Hating You

by Beck, J. L.

  Parker emits a deep husky chuckle from his chest. “Why are you looking at it like it might kill you?” Because it might. The thing is long and thick, and there is no way in hell, it’s all going to fit in my mouth.

  “I’m not,” I muster up the lie, refusing to let him know just how inexperienced I am with all of this.

  Licking his lips, he places both his hands behind his head, “I’m waiting, Willow, but soon, I won’t wait. Soon I’m going to just take…” He pauses, and his eyes light up with something, something that reminds me of the way a villain gloats when he’s defeated his enemy. “Or maybe that’s what you want…”

  “No…” I shake my head and move my trembling hand to his cock. Exhaling, I tell myself I can do this. It’s just a blow job. Not rocket science. I bite back a gasp at the softness of his mushroom head, and move my hand lower, till it’s wrapped around his shaft. Then I lean forward to suck the tip into my mouth. I keep my eyes on Parker’s watching his every move as I do so.

  “I want a real fucking blow job, Willow, not some teenage bullshit,” he grits out and moves one of his hands into my hair. His fingers splay through the strands, snagging on a few, but that doesn’t stop him. He tugs, causing pain to lance across my scalp. Placing my hands on his knees, I’m tempted to pull away, but with pressure on the back of my head, I know it wouldn’t do me any good. He has me right where he wants me.

  I’m not prepared for what comes next, though.

  Holding my head in place, he thrusts his hips upward, and his thick shaft skids to the back of my throat. Oh, god. My gag reflex springs to life, and tears form in my eyes at the intrusion. My lungs burn, and I struggle against his hold, trying to pull away. A mumbled whimper vibrates through his cock, and just when I’m sure he’s going to try and murder me with the thing, he pulls back, only to do it all over again.

  “Fuck, your mouth feels like heaven,” he mumbles while I choke around his length. When he pulls back, I suck in a greedy breath of air, saliva dribbling from my bottom lip. He pulls my head down again, and I make a loud, gagging noise as he bottoms out in my throat. Digging my nails into his jean-clad thighs only seems to egg him on, his strokes become more violent, harder.

  He is all around me. Invading every one of my senses. All I can feel is him, claiming me. All I can smell is his rich, exotic scent. He’s wild and rough, and I know if I let him even a little bit, he’ll consume me. He’ll snuff out all the good in me.

  As he continues to fuck my mouth, giving me only tiny moments to catch my breath, warmth starts to pool in my belly. Each stroke moves the warmth further south until I can feel the wetness of my arousal against my panties. Being dominated by him turns me on as much as it sickens me.

  “Shit, Willow, suck me hard, make me come in that pretty little mouth.” The thickness of his voice ripples through me. Oddly, I want to prove myself to him, that I’m stronger than him, that he can’t break me. At the same time, I want to disobey him and tell him that I can’t do this… I want to run out of this house and never come back.

  Tears sting my eyes, the confusion of everything zings through me, appearing in my mind like a bright blinking neon sign. Tugging at my hair, causing my scalp to burn with pain, he bucks his hips a few more times until I feel him pulse deep inside my throat.

  So deep that I can barely taste his come. Only when he releases me and his cock slides out, do I notice the saltiness that’s left behind on my tongue.

  “That was fucking amazing…” Parker sighs and settles back into the couch. His deep brown eyes are closed now, and he looks relaxed like he doesn’t have a care in the world. I don’t know why, but I remain there for a long moment, just staring at him.

  Dread slowly seeps into every pore as I realize what I’ve just done. I let my gaze move to my hands, and all I can see is dirt on them, my skin forever dirty. I’ve never felt so disgusted, so tainted in all my life. Even worse, I feel ashamed because deep down, a part of me liked it. Shaking my head, I will the thoughts away. I’m so fucking confused. I don’t know what to think right now. What I do know is that I need to get out of here. I need to get away from him.

  By the time I manage to get up and stand on unsure legs, I’m doing the one thing I swore to myself I’d never do in front of him… I’m crying. Big fat tears roll down my face, I’m no longer able to keep my emotions in check.

  No. I can’t. I won’t.

  Parker’s eyes pop open and immediately find mine. Instantly, I look away. I don’t want to see how much he enjoys seeing me like this. Breaking down like he always wanted me to. Spinning around on my heels, I run toward the door.

  “Willow,” he calls out to me, but I don’t stop. I can’t. I refuse to. Pushing myself, I open the front door and escape the confines of the house. Once outside, I let my feet carry me down the driveway and away from his house. I don’t stop running until my lungs burn, begging me to slow down or fall over dead.

  This was a mistake, a huge mistake, and one that I’ll have to make again if I have even a chance at surviving my father and Parker.

  10

  Parker

  Every thought I have leads me back to her. I can’t get the way she looked on her knees, between my legs, with my cock in her mouth out of my head. She looked like a pure, innocent angel with a cracked halo. So fragile and perfect. So fucking breakable.

  I’d never come so hard in my entire life. My intentions weren’t to just fuck her face, but one dip inside her hot wet mouth, and I lost it. I exploded, and everything faded away. All I could feel was her mouth wrapped around my cock, and it felt like heaven.

  It wasn’t even her blow job skills that made it good, it was good because it was her, the girl I’d fantasized about since I was fifteen. Frankly, her skills sucked, I don’t think she’d given many blow jobs before, maybe not any.

  Which only adds to her innocent appeal.

  Even though she didn’t know what she was doing, everything was perfect. Right until the moment she got up, and I saw the look on her face. I do my best to forget that part, but guilt is gnawing at me like a starving animal gnaws on a carcass. Maybe I took it too far, maybe I should have been a little gentler. I’m confused about my feelings, all I know is that I’ll have to control myself better next time.

  Next time. Just thinking about it has my cock straining against my jeans. I adjust my crotch before people can notice my hard-on as I walk across campus, then again, no one would dare say anything to me. I could kill someone point-blank right here, and the school would remove the body and pretend it never happened.

  I just make it around the corner of the cafeteria when I come to a sudden halt. My hands turn into iron fists, my nails digging painfully into my palm as I take in the scene before me. Willow is sitting at a table, Warren and two of our friends, Cameron and Easton are with her. She is trying to eat something, but Warren is hovering over her, pulling her tray away from her. One hand is on the back of her chair as he takes the seat next to her, pulling her so close that his arm is basically wrapped around her. It reminds me too much of a typical couple… boyfriend and girlfriend. The thought amps up my rage. Mine. She’s mine.

  With my blood reaching boiling point, I march over there like I’m marching onto a battlefield. People move out of the way, and as soon as I’m close enough, I grab Warren’s neck from behind and pull him out of his seat.

  “What the…” he spins around, fists clenched and ready to fight. When he sees that it’s me, he lowers his fist and stares at me in confusion. Doesn’t he know not to touch what’s mine?

  “What the hell are you doing? Only I get to touch her.” I release him with a shove. Cameron and Easton snicker at the show I’m giving them.

  “Fine,” he sighs, holding up his hands like he did nothing wrong. “We were just talking, no reason to have a mental breakdown.”

  Ha, I’m not dumb. Warren and Nate have both been interested in her since that day in the classroom. Warren was interested from the moment he caught sight of her.
/>
  “You should be glad we’re friends. Because if we weren’t, you would be on the floor right now.” Dismissing him, I look past him to where Willow is sitting. She hasn’t looked up from her food. Using her fork, she picks at the salad in front of her. What the fuck? Her disinterest and lack of response to my presence infuriates me.

  Obviously, she needs another reminder, another lesson in who owns her, and this entire fucking school. Without an explanation, I grab her upper arm and pull her out of her chair. She drops the fork in the process, and it flies across the table, landing on the side of her plate with a loud cling. I can feel eyes on us, but don’t pay them any attention.

  “Hey, I was still eating,” she complains, trying to pull her arm free. Her eyes are missing their usual gleam.

  “Looked like it, but if you’re still hungry, you can eat after,” I tell her as I pull her through the cafeteria and out the door. She doesn’t even try and fight me, and that adds to my newfound level of annoyance. Where is her fight? Her spirit?

  “After what?”

  “After I’m done with you.” Maintaining my grip on her, I walk her across the courtyard and toward her dorm. I don’t have the patience to drive to my place today. I need her, and I need her now. My entire body burns to show her that she is mine, and mine alone. The shit with Warren only made my need to possess her stronger.

  By the time we get into the dorm, Willow is panting, her chest rising and falling in rapid successions.

  “When I said I would do whatever you wanted, I didn’t mean whenever you wanted.” She pants, trying her best to catch her breath. I fish out the key card from my pocket and unlock her dorm room. She already knows I have a key, so there’s no reason for me to hide it anymore.

  “Doesn’t matter, you made a deal with the devil, and in doing so, you gave yourself to me. That means if I want you to suck me off in the cafeteria in front of a room full of people, then you will.” With the door open, I usher her into the room and close it behind us, locking it for good measure. Finally, now that we’re alone… it feels like the pressure on my lungs has disappeared. When I’m alone with her… No. I shake the thought away. She’s nothing, a means to an end.

  Turning back to Willow, I give her my undivided attention. She looks nervous, even more nervous than she did yesterday, but she’s holding onto her pride, using it as a stepping-stone. With her head held high, she’s still too proud to admit how scared she is, even though her body vibrates with the feelings she refuses to submit to.

  Beautiful. Fragile. She’s glass, and I’m the sledgehammer that’s going to come crashing down on her.

  “Strip,” I order, watching her eyes gleam with hatred for me, but hate isn’t the only thing in those green depths of hers. There’s a crackling of embers, a slow-building fire, and that makes me feel a little less guilty about what’s happening here. It makes me feel like maybe, just maybe, a part of her does want this. And that confuses the fuck out of me.

  The bullied shouldn’t want the bully.

  Forcing myself to look anywhere but at her face, I notice her hands are trembling when she slowly grabs the hem of her shirt and starts to pull it upward, revealing her flat stomach, smooth skin, and bra covered tits.

  My mouth waters at the sight, and I stop myself from clearing my throat. In one swift movement, she pulls it over her head and throws it un-ceremonially onto the floor beside her. While stepping out of her sneakers, she starts to undo the button of her skinny jeans. She unzips them and peels them down her slender legs until they’re bunched up around her ankles.

  When she straightens up, she steps on one side while pulling her leg out of the other, then she kicks her pants off, flinging them across the room like a bratty child. I can’t help it, her careless nature calls to me. She doesn’t give a fuck, and while that pisses me off, it excites me, all the same.

  “Very sexy move,” I smile.

  She rolls eyes, “Sorry, if you want sexy moves, you need to go to the strip club.”

  “Oh, but this is so much better. Now the rest…” I motion with my hands to her still covered tits and pussy.

  She visibly swallows, her throat bobbing as she reaches back to unclasp her white lace bra before letting it slide off her arms and down her body. Two glorious pink nipples sitting on two perfectly perky breasts greet me, and I have to fight the urge to close the distance between us and take one into my mouth. The only thing keeping me from doing that is knowing she is about to take off more, and I’m not quite ready to scare her.

  Her cheeks flame and she chews on her bottom lip, giving off that innocent vibe once more. It hits me then, right in the chest. Fuck, she can’t be a virgin, can she? No, no way. I know I joked about it with Warren, but it can’t really be true. Perhaps her nervousness comes from inexperience, but there’s no way some lucky bastard hasn’t got his dick wet inside her yet.

  Dipping her thumbs into the waistband of her cotton panties, she starts pulling them down her legs, giving me a glimpse of her bare pussy as she goes. My mouth waters looking at her glistening folds. Fucking hell. I can’t wait to taste her, to be inside of her.

  “Happy?” She tries to sound strong and defiant, but I don’t miss the tremble in her voice or the panic in her eyes. She’s scared, and like the fucked-up asshole I am, her fear only makes me want her more.

  I shrug, “Get on the bed. I’ll be happier when my cock is inside of you, making you scream my name loud enough for this entire dorm to know that you’re mine.”

  Shivering, Willow takes a hesitant step toward the bed. Will she try and run? Try and fight me? She was the one that asked for this, the one that came to me and made the deal. Surely, she knows what’s to come?

  Reaching the tiny twin-size mattress, she crawls up onto it, giving me another view of her pussy. Pink, wet, so fucking tempting. My stomach tightens at the thought of slamming into her, and without even thinking, I take a step toward her.

  As if she can sense the beast in me, she rolls over on to her back. Her face pales, and I take another step, and then another until I’ve reached the edge of the bed.

  “You should know that your fear only makes me want you more.

  I want to fuck her, sink deep inside her, let the entire world know that she is mine, and mine, a-fucking-lone, but with the way her body is shaking now, and her hands fisting the sheets, I shove that desire down. Her fear turns me on, but this isn’t just fear, this is something else, something entirely different, and I’m not ready to fully break her yet.

  “You’re sick,” she croaks, her voice trembling.

  My lips tip up at the sides, and I’m sure I look like the monster she portrays me to be, in every way. “Yes, but you like it. You might be scared of me, confused and afraid of what I’ll do, but something inside of you enjoys it. Something inside of you clings to the darkness inside of me. We’re two drops of paint on a white canvas, and one of us is going to dull out the other’s color.” Lifting my hands, I bring them to her knees and push them apart. “Will it be me, or you?”

  A whimper escapes her mouth as I stare down at her pink folds. Her pussy calls to me, and I want to worship it, suck it, lick it, fuck it. I want to own it like she owns a piece of me. Wrapping my hand around her ankle, I pull her until her ass is at the edge of the bed.

  “If you were just going to take it from me, then why strike a deal?” For a moment, I stand there, staring down at my snow white beauty. Did she think I was going to rape her? The thought shocks me and at the same time, makes me want to laugh.

  “I could have anyone I want at this school, Willow. If I wanted pussy, I wouldn’t have to rape someone.” It’s then that she almost visibly sinks into the mattress, her chest not rising and falling as rapidly as it was a minute ago. She thought I was going to hurt her… really hurt her. What the fuck? Is that what she thinks of me?

  “I’m an asshole, a crazy bastard who you should definitely stay away from, but I’m not going to take something you aren’t willing to give me.”


  Her thick lashes brush against her cheek as she watches me with caution, “What are you going to take, then?”

  With a honeyed voice, I reply, “Whatever you give me.”

  Using both hands, I slide them under her thighs and then lift, bending her, so her knees come back toward her chest. A tiny gasp meets my ears, but there isn’t a stop or no that follows the action, so I continue.

  “Use your hands and hold your legs back against your chest. If you move, I stop and trust me, you don’t want me to stop, I mean it.”

  Like the good girl she is, she moves one of her arms and wraps it around her knees. With both hands to use, I smile, and gently spread her folds, exposing her tiny little diamond of a clit. My tongue darts out over my bottom lip, and I feel my cock harden to the point of pain.

  “Has anyone ever eaten you out?” I ask, even though I’m certain I already know the answer.

  “N-no…” She stutters, her voice like silk wrapping around me. The fact that she’s so untouched, so perfect, it drives my obsession for her home. It makes me want to possess every inch of her, destroy all the good. Take and take until there is nothing left.

  “Good, I’ll be your first and your last. No one touches this pussy, no one. Not even you. Not without permission. Do you understand?”

  When she doesn’t reply right away, I pinch her clit between two fingers, forcing her attention to me.

  “Y-yesss… I understand.”

  “Good,” I whisper hoarsely watching as wetness drips down her thighs. She likes this, likes my control.

  Rein it in. Calm down.

  Exhaling, I let go of her clit and replace my fingers with my tongue. I flick it against the bud instead and listen as Willow lets out a hitched breath at the contact. It’s music to my fucking ears, and I do it again, just for safe measure savoring the salty tang of her on my lips, and tongue.

  I’m consumed, completely fucking consumed by her, and I’m afraid of what’s going to happen when all of this is over.