Within Reach

by Talie D. Hawkins

  I watched him going back and forth, feeling a tiny bit dizzy as he moved.

  “You can’t do that,” he snapped. I flinched at the anger in his voice.

  “Do what? I didn’t do anything?” I was suddenly on the verge of tears. He heard the crack in my voice and stopped pacing.

  “We aren’t here yet. It’s okay if we’re not. I’m not complaining because I’m missing out on concerts with my girlfriend. Please don’t do things you’re not ready for because of me.”

  “That’s not how this works, Riley. How long do you think you’ll be fine with this? With a girlfriend who can’t function like a person?”

  “For as long as you’ll have me,” he said as he moved closer.

  “You say that now.” I wrapped my arms around myself. I was saying things I had been afraid to admit since we became a couple.

  “It’s just a concert. We do plenty of other stuff together.”

  “Sometimes I feel like there are more limits than we like to admit.”

  “I disagree.” He had been hesitant to touch me as he attempted to let me recover from all the strangers I had encountered, but now he was right in my reach, waiting for me to give him a signal. I wrapped my arms around his waist and rested my head against his chest.

  “Can we leave here?”

  Moments later a ride share car showed up. We sent a text to Gwen and Jake letting them know we took off and Riley surprised me by talking me back to carousel park. I had expected him to call it a night for my sake, so this was a nice surprise.

  “Why are we here?”

  “You’ll see.” He took me by the hand and led me to the very spot where he took my blindfold off. He held both of my hands in his as he looked down at me. “This is where I knew.”

  “Knew what?” I asked. My heartbeat raced a little as I thought about the night he made my wishes come true.

  “Remember when I said you didn’t feel new to me? You feel like home Jane. Something about you and being with you feels right. Nothing could ever convince me otherwise. You could tell me that our time together was limited to one five minute visit a year with no touching and I would say hell yes. I love you Jane. Nothing is going to change that. Not the fact that you get overwhelmed or that we need to think about crowds before we decide to do something. I don’t care what we’re doing as long as we do it together.”

  I took in what he said as the tears started to spill from my eyes. Nothing I could think of to say felt like an adequate response to the way he melted my heart.

  “The moment you confronted me when we were paired up for class I had a feeling about you. That little spark had me awake at night. Everything around me turned invisible because all I could see was your face and then we came here. When you giggled on the unicorn and I saw your smile, that’s when I knew I was in love and I needed to kiss you. I’m feeling just like that right now.”

  He didn’t give me a chance to speak or return the proclamation of love. He lowered his lips to mine and stunned me with a kiss that made heat rush to my cheeks. I whispered into his lips and felt him try to pull away, but this time I didn’t let him. I wrapped my arms around his neck and pulled him closer. I moved my lips away from his and kissed along his stubbly jawline then down to his neck. He squeezed me a little tighter and let out a low moan that made my heart race faster.

  “Jane,” he pleaded. “I can’t remain a gentleman if you don’t stop,” he said, a little out of breath. “Believe me, if we weren’t in public this would escalate quickly.” I remembered myself and even though the park was almost empty and it was dark, I pulled back a little to catch my breath.

  “Sorry.”

  “Jesus. Don’t be,” he said as he ran a hand through his hair. “This time my reluctance had nothing to do with overwhelming you.” I turned bright red as I thought about what he said. “I’d like to take you home now,” he said as he pulled up the ride share app.

  “Oh, I’m going home?” I couldn’t hide the disappointment in my voice.

  “No.” He looked at me and my heart flip flopped in my chest. The intensity on his face made me shake. “That’s not what I said.”

  I had to catch my breath again. He kept me tucked close as we rode to his house, not once pulling away to make sure I was okay.

  His house was dark when we stepped inside, but we didn’t pause long in the entry way. He pulled me in for one kiss that made my head spin before leading me to his bedroom. Once the door was closed he pushed me against it, gently, but with enough force to make me gasp. He leaned into me as his fingers traced the outlines of my face and collar bone. I got goosebumps from the way he was studying my me.

  “What am I feeling?” he whispered into my ear. I shook my head no. “Tell me,” he whispered.

  “Desire,” I said, my voice almost giving out. “Weakness,” I whispered. His lips landed on my collar and I gasped. “Riley,” I murmured.

  “Oh god,” he moaned just before his lips took over mine. Moments later we were on his bed, only separated by the thin layers of clothing we had on. Our hands and lips explored one another until our emotions became a tangled mess and I couldn’t tell my need from his.

  “I have been holding back for so long,” he said as he kissed the top of my head. “But tonight I...I don’t know. I almost couldn’t stop.” I was tucked under his chin with our arms and legs wrapped around each other. “I needed to be lost in you. Just to not over-think.” I tilted my head up and kissed the underside of his chin. “Don’t press your luck, Janey. I’m not sure I’m completely cooled off yet and I already came terribly close to not stopping.”

  “You don’t have to protect me from myself all the time.”

  “And you don’t have to pretend that everything is fine when I can clearly see it’s not,” he countered.

  “Fair enough.” I hated it, but he was right and the only way this thing between us would work is for both of us to be honest. “But please ask me before you assume I’m losing it.”

  “Seems reasonable... as long as you tell the truth.”

  For someone who didn’t know me for very long he sure did know me all too well.

  Chapter 25

  I never pictured myself going to school dances or getting my make up done, but here I was in a formal dress. Gwen had helped me pick it out. I felt like a ballerina in the ice blue dress. It was fitted at the top with spaghetti straps and flared out at the bottom with layers of tulle. I was tracing one of the tiny gold triangle shaped sequins as I took in the sight of myself all dressed up.

  “I feel weird,” I said as Gwen used a gold clip to pull back one side of my hair.

  “You don’t look weird. You look gorgeous, Pixie.” I turned around and rolled my eyes at her. “Not compared to you.” Her long legs peeked through a slit in the side of her form fitting black evening gown.

  “Let’s put on some berry colored gloss,” she said as she looked in her make up drawer. “There,” she said as she added the final coat. “Damn,” she said as she took in the sight of her handy work. Her doorbell rang and we both looked in the direction of her living room. “Guess the boys are here,” I said, not really knowing why I felt nervous. Everything had been calm for weeks. Riley and I had settled into a comfortable routine and the school was finally getting used to the idea of us as couple. I still got death stares from a few girls, but Riley claimed he had earned a few new enemies as well. I got up and wobbled a little in the simple black strapped heels I was wearing.

  “Most petite girls are experts in heels.” This earned Gwen a slap on the arm.

  “It’s not my fault if I never have a reason to wear them. I’m not prancing down any runways.”

  “Hey! I do not prance!” We both heard the doorbell again and this time she ran to the door in her heels, no doubt just to show off. “Jane, our chariot is here!” she yelled to me. I came out of her room and stopped in my tracks when I saw Riley in a fitted suit. His hands were in his pockets and he was laughing at something Jake has said. I remembere
d why every girl had a crush on him as I watched him, then I saw Jake slap his arm and tell him turn around. He looked in my direction and I saw something change in his piercing blue eyes.

  He crossed the room to where I was and took one hand out of his pocket. He traced my cheek with his fingertip, giving me instant shivers. He didn’t speak, just took my hand and walked me outside to his car. Jake and Gwen were laughing as they got in the back seat, and Riley opened the passenger door for me and helped me up and into my seat. Once we were at the dance I started to tense up and Riley squeezed my hand when he saw the nervousness on my face.

  Gwen was already dancing as she and Jake jogged to the entrance and I tried to keep up, but Riley pulled back on my hand, stopping me in place. We were a little bit away from the crowd in a courtyard they had decorated with twinkling string lights and snowflakes. I wrapped my arms around myself to warm up from the cold night air, but Riley took off his jacket and wrapped it around my shoulders.

  “Thanks,” I said as I looked up at him straightening out his skinny tie. He reached down and pushed a lock of hair behind my ear. I suddenly had goosebumps all over from the way he was looking at me.

  “Each time you happen to me all over again,” he whispered. I had read those words by Edith Wharton over and over again, but to hear them on his lips in his low voice left me feeling dazzled. “I can’t help it. I don’t want to share you with the crowd or the noise. They way you look takes my breath away and I want that all to myself. Just a little longer.” I felt my breath catch just before he wrapped an arm around my waist and lowered his lips to mine. His kiss said it all. He was claiming me and I was completely giving in. When he pulled back he smiled at me then offered me his arm to take. “Shall we?” I had hardly recovered from his kiss as we walked into the dance.

  His arms remained around my waist, keeping me close and protected until we got to the dance floor for a slow song that was playing. I put my hands on his chest and rested my head under his chin as he completely wrapped me in his own arms. It was impossible not to feel the stares of the people around us, but none of that mattered. As long as I was close to him everything else was just background noise.

  “Are you happy?” he whispered against my hair.

  “Insouciant,” I answered. He laughed a little at my choice of word.

  “Only you, St. George.”

  “It’s the perfect word to describe most of what I’m feeling.”

  “Most? What else are you feeling?” He was looking down at me and I was already drowning in his blue eyes.

  “In love.” A smile spread across his mouth before he kissed me and suddenly I was seeing stars. I felt everything and for once it felt perfect.

  Now for the legal mumbo jumbo:

  Within Reach by Talie D. Hawkins

  © 2020 Talie D. Hawkins

  All rights reserved. No portion of this book may be reproduced in any form without permission from the publisher, except as permitted by U.S. copyright law. For permissions contact

  talie.d.hawkins.books@gmail.com

  http://taliehawkins.wixsite.com/author

  This book is a work of fiction. Any similarity between the characters and situations within its pages and places or persons, living or dead, is unintentional and co-incidental.