Rise From the Ashes

by Noah Harris

  “Why is that so surprising?” he asked, shooting her a smirk.

  Her smile remained in place. “You just never seemed like the type to like children. I don’t think I’ve ever seen you play with them before.”

  He shrugged. “I don’t think I’ve ever had the chance.”

  “That’s true. You never did come around here much...” It wasn’t a judgemental or a barbed comment, like those he often received from others. It was simply an observation, a fact.

  He let his gaze sweep out across the wide lawn, over the pack, old and young. “I never really had a reason to.”

  “We’re pack,” she said, as if that were reason enough.

  “Yeah, but I had no business in pack politics. I like living on my own, and I only had reason to come here when there was an event. And during those events, there were times when I snuck away to play with the kids. It’s not surprising you never noticed. I wasn’t exactly advertising my presence.”

  She looked thoughtful as her hands rubbed her belly. “I suppose that’s true. Unfortunately, now you have plenty of business with pack politics.”

  He chuckled. “Unfortunately, indeed.”

  “I wasn’t sure you’d step up to the challenge,” she admitted softly. “Eddie always had high hopes for you, and he wanted you to fill his place when he stepped down. I think he assumed he’d have more time to groom you for the position...”

  He reached out, putting a comforting arm around her shoulders and pulling her in close. “I know,” he said. “And for what it’s worth, I wasn’t sure I’d be right for this position, but Eddie’s faith in me is a driving force.”

  “He believed in you.”

  “I know. It’s what keeps me going some days. I think he saw a part of me that I’ve been afraid to see myself.”

  “He was good like that. Could see right into the hearts of people. Could read them like a book. It’s one of the many reasons he made a good Alpha.”

  “He did, indeed. Whenever I find myself questioning anything, I ask myself what Eddie would do.”

  “I think you’re doing a wonderful job as Alpha.”

  He looked at her then, honestly surprised. He examined her face, but there was no hint of sarcasm. “Really?”

  She laughed then, eyes dancing with amusement. Her laugh had been so rare since Eddie’s death. It was good to hear it. “Yes, really. You rose to the position after very unfortunate circumstances and in a time where the potential for strife is high, but you’ve been handling it all very well. I’m impressed.”

  A ball of tension seemed to melt from his shoulders. “Thank you. I’m trying.”

  She nodded. “There are, of course, going to be more trials and tribulations. Not everyone is happy with the peaceful route you’ve been taking, and there are those who would love to jump at the chance to be Alpha.” Her eyes wandered the lawn, stopping when she reached a group of men huddled close.

  Adam followed her gaze and sighed. “Yeah, I know. But I can’t please everyone, so I might as well do what I think is right.”

  She leaned her head to his shoulder. “And that’s why I believe you will be a good leader. But I don’t think it’s wise to do it alone.”

  He stiffened. “What do you mean?” he asked, trying to keep his voice neutral and curious.

  She straightened, stepping a little away so she could turn to face him. His arm dropped from her shoulder. “You know what I mean. An Alpha by himself must be strong, but his mate has plenty of responsibilities of her own.” She smiled kindly. “Trust me, I did plenty to help the pack so Eddie didn’t have to do it all alone. I was his strength and his support, and the pack respected me as his voice when he wasn’t around. It’s a very helpful thing to have when you can’t be everywhere at once.” She reached out and laid a hand on his arm, squeezing gently. “And it’s nice to not be alone.”

  He put a hand on hers and squeezed. “I know you’re worried about me, but I’m fine.” He went back to drying himself off as best he could. “Besides, I know this is about Millie.”

  “She would make a very good mate for you,” Sarah said. “She is very capable, and she’s been grooming for this. She cares deeply for the pack, and the pack respects her. She’s more aggressive and firm than I was, but I think it’s something that would be good for the pack. She would do wonders by your side.”

  He sighed. “I know, but it’s more complicated than that.”

  “You two have known each other for years. Once upon a time, you two were close. Everyone assumed you’d be mates sooner rather than later, but then you drifted apart. And I don’t think it was her decision.”

  “It wasn’t, but she gave me no choice. She wanted to be my mate, and I didn’t want her. It came between us.”

  “Why don’t you want her? She is the perfect mate.”

  He gave her a wry smile. “On paper, perhaps, but life is more complicated than that.”

  Her plump lips pursed into a confused frown. “Eddie used to say the same thing. He was on your side about the matter, but I never understood why, and he wouldn’t tell me.”

  “Eddie knew me better than most,” Adam mumbled. “His friendship meant the world to me.”

  “He would say the same about you, if he could.”

  “Thank you.”

  “Do you want kids, Adam?” She asked suddenly.

  He started, looking at her with wide eyes. “What?”

  “Do you want kids?” she asked again, patient and kind as ever.

  He shrugged, looking away. “Someday, yes. I don’t think now is the time, but... someday, I would like to.” He scratched the back of his neck, thoughts drifting to Josh. He imagined the omega bouncing a child on his knee, the product of their union. He imagined having a family with him, coming home to them every day. His neck heated up, and he bit his cheek to keep the flush from rushing his face.

  “I think you would make a good father,” she offered, not unkindly. “You just need the perfect mate.”

  “I know, and I think I’ll find one soon.”

  Her eyebrows rose in obvious surprise. “Oh?”

  He nodded. “Just give me time. As I said, now isn’t quite the time for family.”

  She looked at him with a sly smile, eyes calculating. “You look like you already have someone in mind. Who is she?”

  “That’s a secret for now,” he said, putting a hand on her shoulder as he passed.

  “Will I get to meet her someday?” she called after him.

  He turned on his heel, walking away backwards. “Someday.” He promised.

  The room was lit by nothing more than the dim glow from the television screen. Music played softly, something nondescript and instrumental, while the credits rolled. It faded to background noise. Both of them had stopped paying attention long ago.

  Adam laid on his back on his couch. It was an old, worn thing, not exactly the prettiest couch to look at, but boy, was it comfortable. Even more so when he had Josh curled up on top of him. The couch was long enough that he could stretch out comfortably, head propped up on a pillow against the arm rest. He had one hand behind his head while the other arm was around Josh, hand beneath Josh’s shirt as he idly rubbed his back. With their legs entangled, Josh was curled into his side, one hand resting on Adam’s chest and head on his shoulder.

  “They want to meet you, you know,” Adam said, finally breaching the silence that had fallen warm and peaceful around them. His voice was thick and hoarse with disuse and drowsy contentment.

  “Hmm?” Josh hummed after a moment. He sounded half asleep, though when Adam looked, his head was turned away. He couldn’t tell if his eyes were opened or closed.

  “They want to meet you,” he repeated.

  “Who?” Josh asked after a moment. He shifted, tilting his head up to set his chin on Adam’s chest, gazing up at him. “Your pack? Do they know about us?”

  Adam let out a surprised chuckle. “No, not my pack. They don’t know about us. About me. Yet...” He shook hi
s head. “No, I meant— well, I guess they’re part of my pack— I meant my friends.”

  Josh stilled against him, fingers curling just a little into the fabric of his shirt. “Your friends?”

  “Yeah, is that a problem?”

  “No, no, no, it’s not.” Josh said quickly, shifting so that he was lying more fully on top of him. He crossed his arms over Adam’s chest, resting his chin on his wrists. His lips were curled in a small, soft smile. “I just... I’m happy you want me to meet your friends.” He spoke so earnestly and his voice was so full of warmth that Adam’s stomach fluttered.

  He grinned, both hands going to Josh’s waist, slipping beneath the hem of his shirt that was riding high anyway. He had such a small waist, and he felt so fragile beneath his hands. His skin was so smooth and warm and tantalizing. “Yeah, I do. I think they’d like you.”

  Josh ducked his eyes, staring at Adam’s neck as his fingers idly traced his collar bone. “You said they want to meet me...” he mumbled, then glanced up through his lashes. “Does that mean they know about us?”

  Adam cleared his throat, giving him a sheepish smile. “Uh, well... not exactly. My closest friends are the people who live in the other apartments here.”

  Josh blinked. “All of them?”

  “Yeah, all four apartments here are rented by my pack. We’re all pretty close.”

  Josh opened his mouth, then closed it, brows furrowing. Adam watched as he thought, pieces falling into place. Finally, a small smirk curved his lips. “That explains why I’ve caught them staring when I come over.”

  Adam chuckled. “Yeah, they’re curious. I’ve never had anyone over, and we’re all incredibly nosey with each other.”

  “One time, when I was leaving, the guy on the first floor was standing in the open doorway of his apartment, smoking, and he winked at me. It didn’t feel like he was hitting on me, but it did feel like he knew something...”

  Adam groaned lightly, rolling his eyes. “That was Tom. Ignore him. He’s a douchebag.”

  Josh chuckled. “You sound fond of that douchebag.”

  “I am,” he confessed. “I’m fond of all of them.”

  Josh tilted his head to rest his cheek on his arms. “Then I can’t wait to meet them.”

  Adam grinned, hands pushing up beneath Josh’s shirt to let his fingers idly trail along his spine, memorizing each and every bump. Josh repressed a shiver and shifted happily atop him. “Karen knows.”

  “Karen?”

  Adam nodded. “Two sisters live in the apartment below me. Karen is the oldest, and she knows.”

  “You told her?”

  “No, but she guessed, and I couldn’t deny it. She admitted that she’s in the same boat, so it was easy to confide in her.”

  “She’s gay, too? Well, at least you have someone to confide in.”

  “Yeah, it helps a lot, even if we don’t really talk about it.”

  “I can imagine.”

  “So you’d be willing to meet them?”

  “Yeah.” Josh scooted forward, nuzzling his face into the crook of Adam’s neck. He could feel the smile against his skin. “Yeah, I think that would be nice.” He kissed Adam’s neck, and Adam shivered, hands tightening on Josh’s back.

  Josh froze, feeling the tension in the body beneath him. Adam felt his breath speed up and go shallow. For a long moment, neither of them moved. Then, hesitantly, almost cautiously, Josh leaned forward again, pressing his lips to Adam’s neck once more. Adam tried to keep from reacting to such a simple and innocent touch, but his body betrayed him. His breath hitched. He hoped Josh didn’t hear it, but the grin he felt against his skin said otherwise.

  The omega relaxed on top of him, his weight settling as he melted into Adam’s warmth. His lips, however, didn’t stop. He trailed soft, chaste kisses along the column of his neck, down to his shoulder, before moving back up. Then his lips latched onto the sensitive flesh beneath his ear, sucking lightly, nose brushing his ear.

  Adam had to bite his lip, but even that couldn’t stop the deep groan from rumbling out of his throat. His hands on Josh’s back became more insistent, roaming with a mind of their own. He desperately groped the soft flesh, fingers spread wide, reveling in the feel of him, up and down his back, his sides, his waist.

  Josh shifted his head again, sucking his earlobe into his mouth and nibbling gently.

  “Josh...” The sound of his name was one of warning, of pleading.

  Josh released his earlobe and whispered, breath caressing his sensitive skin. “Do you want me to stop?”

  “Dear lord, no,” Adam breathed out, voice rough. His hands slid down to Josh’s waist, moving past to settle on his hips. He arched his back, pushing his own hips up and making his hardening erection known. It was almost embarrassing how easily Josh could get a rise out of him, how quickly his body reacted to the omega. He wasn’t sure if it was the fact that he hadn’t been touched like that in years or if it was Josh himself. He was willing to bet it was a combination of both.

  Josh gasped, hips automatically jerking to grind down against him. They both let out shuddering sighs at the contact.

  “Josh...” Adam repeated, running his fingers through Josh’s hair. “If you keep this up, I don’t know if I’ll be able to stop...” The omega let out a pleased whine, leaning into the touch. His back arched, pushing certain parts of his body more firmly against Adam. Adam’s other arm tightened around him. His voice was breathless, hoarse. It was the only warning he could give. He didn’t want to push Josh past his comfort zone, but Adam could feel a fire beneath his skin, a need rising in him, predatory and primal. He knew that once he got a taste, he wouldn’t be able to hold back.

  Josh bent his head again, running tongue and teeth along Adam’s neck in kisses that were anything but chaste. He came teasingly close to Adam’s scent glands, toeing that line without crossing it. Adam bit back another groan, automatically turning his head to the side to allow the omega more access. He only hummed pleasantly and dipped his head to nip at Adam’s collarbones. His hands dug into the fabric of Adam’s shirt.

  “I don’t want you to stop,” he breathed, voice low and ragged, thin with need and desire.

  Adam stilled, feeling the breath leave his lungs. His ears felt like they were ringing, and his mind went dizzy with anticipation and adrenaline. “Are you sure?”

  “Yes,” Josh whined, squirming atop him. His hands moved, smoothing down Adam’s chest, down his sides, coming up to grasp at his shoulders. He nuzzled into his neck, nosing and nipping at the sensitive flesh. He breathed, hips squirming, pressing against his own. “Adam, please... Please, touch me.”

  Adam didn’t need to be told twice.

  His fingers tightened in Josh’s hair, pulling his head up so he could crash their lips together. It was hard and desperate. They’d kissed plenty of times before. They’d kissed softly, hesitantly, fondly, eagerly, but nothing like this. This was sloppy, uncoordinated, and raw. There were teeth and tongues and lips caught between. He pushed into Josh’s mouth with little preamble, and the omega opened up instantly, tilting his head into it and whining into his mouth. His hands scrambled at Adam’s chest, shoulders, neck, and hair, trying to gain purchase. Adam kissed him hard and without mercy, reveling in the sounds he made and enjoying the way he melted against him, body shaking and writhing on top of him.

  His hand left Josh’s hair, both hands scrambling at the material of his shirt. He pushed it up, breaking their kiss only long enough to rip it over Josh’s head and toss it to the floor. He dove forward for the omega’s lips again, but Josh pulled back, pouting and making pitiful sounds as he leaned back to tug at Adam’s shirt. It barely had time to hit the floor before their lips were locked again.

  He grabbed the back of Josh’s thigh, hooking it around his hip before flipping their positions. Josh gasped against his lips, but Adam didn’t break the kiss. He pressed the omega into the couch, settling his weight between his legs. Josh sighed happily, wrapping his ar
ms around Adam’s neck and shoulders, kissing him back with uncoordinated fervor. One of Adam’s arms slipped beneath his back, holding him tight, while the other hand ran up and down his thigh.

  He broke the kiss to trail his lips along Josh’s jaw, nipping down his neck, sucking roughly to bring bruises to the surface. Josh gasped and moaned, squirming beneath him. His fingers dug into Adam’s hair, tugging hard enough to feel good but not enough to pull him away. Adam growled, nipping at his jaw. His hand left Josh’s leg, trailing up his chest, fingers spread wide to feel everything. Josh’s muscles jumped and squirmed beneath his touch.

  He dipped his head lower, trailing open mouthed kissed along his collarbones, down his chest, reveling in the taste of him. When his lips latched onto a nipple, he sucked hard, and Josh’s head snapped back into the pillow, body arching into the touch. Adam’s hand moved up to play with the neglected nipple, and Josh gasped and squirmed, hips pushing relentlessly against him, hands grabbing at his shoulders and back, nails biting into his skin.

  When he looked up, Josh was biting his bottom lip in a weak attempt to stop the sounds escaping, his eyes squeezed shut. His pale skin was flushed. Adam had never seen a more beautiful sight.

  Something uncurled in his chest, something primal that had long been dormant: the need to claim, to take Josh relentlessly and without mercy, to hold him tight and make him his. He wanted Josh with a single-minded desire that threw all rational thought out the window.

  His hands were at Josh’s jeans before he really realized what he was doing. Fingers fumbled with the button and zipper in his haste to remove them. It took Josh a moment to catch up, but when he did, his hands were between them, helping Adam take off his pants before moving to his own.

  With their pants finally shed, Adam took a moment to simply gaze down at him. He was beautiful. Small shoulders and small waist, creamy skin flushed and bruises forming on his neck and chest. His lips were parted and kiss-swollen, moist and gleaming. His hair was tousled and mused, eyes dark in the dim lighting. His legs were spread to accommodate Adam, arms lying beside him on the pillow, sprawled out to his sides. He waited, watching Adam watch him. He looked vulnerable, beautiful, trusting, and eager.