Agate- Then and Now

by M. D. Grimm

  I cleared my throat, my own eyes burning. Blinking rapidly, I pulled back and lifted Drasyln again, using the force bubble. I grabbed his hand, his calluses scraping against mine. The familiarity calmed me.

  “Come on.”

  ***

  We took our leave of the ludkis. They understood my reason for departing so quickly and didn’t take offense, for which I was very grateful. I had to get Drasyln into the council’s hands. If I kept her any longer, I feared I would transition back into someone I didn’t want to be. Well, that wasn’t completely true—part of me did want to become that mage once again, which was why I had to remove temptation.

  We teleported back to Geheimnis, much to Aishe’s discomfort, and appeared on the landing outside my fortress’s front doors. I dragged Drasyln across the rocky surface, fully aware I was being horribly vindictive. She groaned through her gag, twitching now and then. I didn’t feel pity. Or remorse. Or guilt. Or mercy. What I felt was cold justification. I didn’t allow myself to indulge in it too much.

  Aishe watched my treatment of her but said nothing. I think part of him was satisfied with her punishment. He pushed open Geheimnis’ doors and we walked inside. Grendela and other boygles immediately came to greet me home. I roughly shoved Drasyln in front of me, still bound, and she rolled on her stomach across the carpeted floor, coming to rest on her side facing me. She grunted, her eyes red-rimmed, trying to glare at me. I ignored her.

  “Take that to the caverns,” I ordered. “Give her water but no food. Do not untie her. And I need her alive.” I added that last bit as an afterthought. I hadn’t had a prisoner in some time, and I could see the eagerness in the boygles’ eyes, the greedy tilts of their mouths. I thought I should make myself clear about what I wanted done with her. “She will soon be the Hand’s problem. Until then, she should remain unharmed.”

  The boygles would obey me; I had no doubt of that. Grendela snapped out orders in her native tongue, which sounded like hissing and gurgling. Five male boygles came forward, lifted Drasyln above their heads and marched off, Grendela behind them.

  “I need to send a querian to Master Ulezander.”

  “That can wait until morning.” Aishe slipped his arms around my waist, pressing me back against his chest.

  I closed my eyes, indulging in his strength, his desire, and his arousing scent. I let my head fall back, and Aishe proceeded to kiss my neck, sucking my skin gently. I reached around his back and gripped his ass. He shuddered as his hands descended to my groin, cupping me with both hands, massaging gently. My breath quickened, my pulse spiked.

  “You don’t know how hard it was for me,” he whispered near my ear before nipping my lobe. “To wait. To be patient. To train and believe in the promise you made me. There were times I nearly despaired, almost giving up.”

  “I’m glad you didn’t.” My voice was hoarse.

  “So am I.” He cupped my face, turned it, then kissed me slowly. I let him take control, I wanted him to. I let him direct the touches; I let him say what he needed to, what he’d been so long denied. I owed him that.

  “How I wanted to touch you—” he kissed my eyes, “—how I wanted you to touch me. No one ever believed in me before, not like you did. No one ever pushed me to train. Most probably didn’t think I had any hope of becoming a warrior.”

  “You proved them wrong.”

  “Yes, I did.” His hand continued to rub me through my trousers, even as his other held my face close to his, tilted up to receive kiss after kiss. “I’ve never felt this way about anyone, Morgorth. Not then and not now. Perhaps it was a child’s love I felt for you, but it grew into something else; something stronger, something able to weather anything.”

  I opened my eyes, instantly blasted with his green ones. I adored his eyes. I reached my hand up, stroking his cheek. His eyes fluttered, and he pressed into my touch, just like he did then. He was drawn to me, then and now.

  “I’m sorry to make you wait.”

  He smiled, kissed my palm. “You are worth the wait.”

  My heart drummed in my chest, my blood burning hotter with his words, his touch. My magick bubbled just below the surface and shimmered as my arousal grew and grew. My trousers would have to come off soon, they were becoming painfully tight.

  “I guess, in some ways, we were each other’s inspiration,” I said, realizing my words rang true.

  “I agree.” He suddenly spun me around so I faced him. Then he swooped down and devoured my mouth. My arms twined around his neck. This kiss was hungry, desperate, so different from the sweet, seductive kisses of before. His hand tangled in my hair, keeping my head immobile, while his other hand snuck into my trousers and touched my bare ass. His fingers slid inside my crack, over my hole. I moaned into his mouth. My own hands gripped his hair, delighting in the silky strands and the way they caressed my skin. He pulled away from the kiss but before I could complain, I was in his arms, one under my legs, the other around my back. The suddenness of the move made me slightly disoriented.

  But I still managed to scowl, even though I kept my arms around his neck. “Why do you do that? I can walk, dialen.”

  He grinned, and despite the tragedies in his life, the pain and sorrow in his heart, his smile still made his face beam like a shard of sunlight. It made me remember, acutely, what he was like as a child. He hadn’t changed much, really; he was still that same sweet, playful Aishe. He was still a bundle of energy, someone who wanted to laugh, curious and comforting. Only now he had skill and grace to add to his warrior’s heart.

  “Because I can,” Aishe said, walking up the stairs. “I can be strong for you. I can finally show you how much I’ve grown. You can finally see that I followed your orders with everything in me.”

  I did see that and the weight of guilt only became heavier. I pressed my face to his neck, trying to rein in on my emotions. He was happy. He didn’t resent me or blame me for anything. I’d put so much weight on his shoulders, in his present and past, and I hadn’t told him or tried to prevent the massacre of his tribe. And yet, here he was, carrying me to our bedroom, loving me with everything inside him. He was the only creature alive who humbled me just by being who he was.

  We entered the bedroom and Aishe set me on my feet. I stared at him for a moment before lowering my arms and taking a step back. He frowned.

  “I had no right to put so much on you.”

  He smiled slightly. “Morgorth—”

  “No, Aishe.” I shook my head and turned away, running my fingers through my hair. “What right did I have to tell so much to a child? To demand so much of you when you were so young?”

  “You had to, my love.”

  “That doesn’t make it right.” I whipped around, glaring. “It doesn’t matter if all this is what the Mother wrote for us. It doesn’t make what I demanded of you right. Or fair. You were a poor kid with major self-confidence issues and—”

  “Exactly!”

  I stopped, stared. “What?”

  Aishe was smiling. Why? “Morgorth, you just hit the point. I was a child and I had no confidence in myself. But you changed all that. Don’t you understand? You told me I was to become your mate. The mate of a mage. You told me exactly what I had to do to accomplish that. You believed in me, Morgorth. You helped me believe in myself.”

  I knew I gaped but I couldn’t close my mouth. Aishe grabbed my hands, pressing them between his.

  “You gave me a purpose, my love. A goal, something to strive for. You were my motivation, my reason for struggling so hard to overcome my clumsiness. Because of you I made my parents proud, I gained my tribe’s respect. I was on equal footing with my brothers. Where would I have been without you?”

  My eyes burned. He was giving me far too much credit. He was giving me praise I didn’t deserve. “It wasn’t me, Aishe,” I whispered. “You had the strength inside you. You didn’t need me.”

  One of his hands cupped my face, wiped away and errant tear. “But I did. I still do. Please accept t
hat, Morgorth. It’s the truth, I promise. You are my reason, just as I’m yours. I don’t regret the pain of my training, the sweat and blood I’ve spilled, because I found you at long last.” His smile deepened. “I found my prize.”

  There was no way my mind would ever accept that I was a prize. But I could see the truth, Aishe’s truth, in his eyes. He believed what he told me. He believed the words he said. I would respect his wishes and try to accept them. But I doubted if I ever fully would.

  “But the weight, Aishe,” I said softly. “All the weight I put on your shoulders. Not just then, but now. My damn destiny.”

  Aishe pressed his forehead to mine. “My love, you haven’t put all the weight on me. It isn’t just for you or me to bear. Let us share the weight, yes? You have to know we’re stronger together.”

  I closed my eyes. Nodded. “You’re amazing.” I swallowed hard. “I’m so proud of you.”

  Aishe’s breath hitched right before he kissed me again. His fingers made quick work of my belt and jacket. We undressed each other quickly, our touches frenzied and desperate. Soon, he was only wearing the amethyst pendant. It shined against his pale chest, a testament to my love for him. I’d been without him for far too long. I’d been thrown into something I was still trying to comprehend, still trying to make sense of. I needed familiarity, release. I needed to be reminded of the good I had, the joy that had unexpectedly come into my life.

  I needed to remember Aishe.

  He pushed me on the bed, the blankets cool against my heated skin. His weight, his muscle, thrilled me, my hands unable to stay still. I trailed them over his skin, the hairs tickling my palms, a few scars marring his soft skin. But even as he devoured my mouth, dominating me with skill enough to send my head spinning, my fingers found the scar across his back. The scar I’d watched him get. That scene burst to the forefront of my mind, my guilt and horror flooding over desire. I stilled. Aishe sensed my change of mood and pulled back, panting. His eyes skimmed my face. I could only stare at him, speechless, my fingers tracing that scar. Understanding dawned in his eyes.

  “I told you I got it while doing something foolish.” His smile was small and self-deprecating.

  “You were trying to prove yourself,” I whispered.

  “Yes. My heart was in the right place, but not my reflexes.”

  My throat threatened to close. “I’m s—”

  He put his fingers over my mouth. “No more apologizing, Morgorth. Let us live here, in the present. Make love to me.”

  I took a deep breath and shoved aside, with considerable effort, those few days in the past. How could I deny him anything, especially after all he’d done for me? I focused on here, right now, on Aishe; on the feel of his body against mine, the light of his eyes shining on my face, the way his scent enveloped me, like a warm, comforting cloud. With a burst of magick, I changed our positions, shoving him under me. He laughed, nipping my chin. My magick flared in my gut as I lowered my mouth down his neck, to his chest. I took my time, sliding my tongue over both rosy nipples, nipping, then suckling each in turn. His fingers stroked through my hair, his body thrumming with tension and energy beneath me.

  I loved him. I loved him insanely. I continued my descent, my tongue passing over his abs, the evidence of his discipline, his training. There was no fat on him, no give. He was toned and lean, swift and agile. His body was a weapon, but also an instrument. My instrument. My hands found their way to his groin before my mouth. I cupped his balls with one hand, while gently squeezing his erection with the other. He groaned and gripped my hair tighter.

  I pulled back, kneeling between him, his legs bent on either side of my hips. I could stare for eternity at the beauty before me, the way he gave me everything, holding nothing back. His body, his mind, his heart, it was all mine. He gave me everything willingly. I was sure, that if his life force, his spirit, hadn’t already been the Mother’s, he would give me that as well.

  He lay open to me and his hands gripped the pillow on either side of his head, his eyes dark with lust and need. He even spread his legs farther, giving me all the access I could want. My heart clenched in my chest, my magick burned hotter. I looked at his pulsing cock in my hand, the nest of white, curly hairs that surrounded it, half hiding his balls, which I fondled, squeezed. He truly was mine.

  “Morgorth,” he said, panting.

  I smiled at him, squeezing his cock a little bit more, sliding my hand up and down a little faster. “You like that?”

  He nodded, his legs trembling. Then he smiled. “I can’t tell you how many times I fantasized about this.”

  I grinned. I jerked him a little harder than needed. He sucked in a breath. Then I lowered my head and swiped my tongue, briefly, over his hot tip. He moaned.

  “You fantasized about us having sex?” I asked, riding on the power I felt, the sensation of him, heavy in my hands.

  He nodded, panting harder as I picked up the pace. “At first, it was just us, naked together, touching.” He suddenly cleared his throat. “I saw you, you know.”

  I raised my eyebrow. “What do you mean?”

  “When you were swimming, and you used your magick to find my hiding spot. I saw you. Naked.”

  I had wondered. “You most definitely have to be punished for peeping.”

  He laughed breathlessly. I stroked him harder, squeezing his balls just a little bit more. His laugh turned into a moan.

  “It’s funny,” I said suddenly, “that the first time we both saw each other naked was in the water.”

  Aishe smirked at the memory of our hunt for Kayl, and when I’d come upon him naked in the river. It was the first time I saw his scar.

  “I find it wonderfully symmetrical,” Aishe said.

  “You would.”

  Aishe chuckled.

  I continued to stroke him, relishing his sounds of pleasure. “What other fantasies did you have?”

  “Countless. Morgorth, please.”

  “What?” I smiled, knowing I tormented him.

  “Please, let me come.”

  “I don’t think so.” I lowered my head, touching the tip of his cock with my lips, taking only that part of him inside, sucking while stroking him. I didn’t stroke him fast enough to come, but just enough to keep him hard. He grabbed my head and tried to push me down farther on his cock. I resisted. I flicked my tongue over his tip as I continued to suck. He hissed, his hands like a vise on my head.

  “Dammit, Morgorth, you’re not fair.”

  I chuckled, releasing him. He scowled but it only seemed half-hearted.

  I licked my lips. “I love you.”

  He reared up, grabbed my face and kissed me hard, bruising my lips. I gripped his shoulders, thrusting my tongue into his mouth, and he opened eagerly, stroking my tongue with his. It was my turn to groan. He tricked me, though. Before I knew it, I was under him, his weight pressing me down once again. His erection pressed against mine, hardening mine even farther. Aishe wasn’t the only one who needed release. My cock begged for attention and it seemed it would get what it wanted.

  Aishe’s hand gripped my shaft, tugging hard, his thumb rubbing my sensitive tip. I grunted, reaching down to grip his wrist. Our eyes met.

  “Two can play at that game.”

  I chuckled. “Do I rightly guess you fantasized about this as well?”

  “Constantly. First it was you, dominating me, your cock buried deep inside.”

  Heat surged into my groin at his words, and I had to remove his hand, or else I would come. I didn’t want to come yet. He must have sensed or seen something because he left my erection in peace, and dipped his head, lapping at my nipples.

  “Then I thought about what you might feel like inside,” he continued as his touch, his words burned me, making me slightly delirious. “As I grew older, had lovers, I learned a lot. I imagined what I would do to you. How I would claim you again and again. Make you scream.”

  “I think you became slightly obsessed,” I said as an observation.
It was hard to talk, though, since his fingers were stroking and probing my asshole while his other hand cupped my balls as his lips tormented my nipple.

  “Indeed, I was.” He lifted his head, met my eyes. He wasn’t smiling. “You are my obsession, Morgorth. Now you know why I must be with you. Why I clung to you so hard on our hunt for Kayl. Now you know everything. All my secrets are laid bare.”

  But mine weren’t.

  “I need your promise, now, Morgorth.”

  I frowned. “What promise?”

  He cupped my face with both hands, staring so deep, I thought he was staring right into my core. “Promise me that you’ll never cast me aside. Promise me that I’ll always be in your life, no matter what the future brings. You and I are one, Morgorth. We must be together. We are meant to be together. Our destinies are intertwined, you know that now. I know you see it just as I do. The Mother has meant us to be together.”

  I couldn’t argue with his words, and the very idea of casting him aside caused my magick to burn with possessiveness, with the urge to keep what was mine.

  I touched his face. “I promise you, Aishe.”

  He closed his eyes for a moment, then kissed me. We kissed leisurely for some time before things heated once again. Our touches became more urgent, more fevered. I rolled him under me again, probing his asshole. He spread his legs, lifting his knees to his chest. I took full advantage, and with a murmured word, conjured the lube. His eyes burned as I slicked my fingers and probed him again, pushing deep. His eyes closed for a moment as a moan escaped him. He gripped the back of his knees and spread his legs even wider, pulling them even higher.

  I probed him deeper, stroking, caressing, adding more fingers, and relished his strong muscles as they clenched my fingers. He was so soft inside, so warm. I stroked his cock, wanting to give him so much pleasure, he became blind with it. I wanted to give him everything—everything he deserved. He was the most worthy of both of us. I pulled back enough to slick my own erection.