Rush

by Deborah Bladon

  “She was going through my wallet.” He dips his chin. “She had a picture in her hand of Pol and me. We had taken it in one of those photo booths in Santa Monica when we went surfing about a year before he died.”

  He’s quiet for a minute before he clears his throat. “I lost it. I told her to get out. I grabbed the picture. She held tight to it, and it ripped in two.”

  I gasp.

  His eyes linger on mine as if to reassure me that it’s all right. “I still have it taped together in my wallet.”

  “Good,” I whisper.

  “That picture represented something.” He shakes his head. “I don’t know how to explain it, but it was a day to end all days. It was one of the best days of my life.”

  Tears well in the corners of my eyes. I feel his loss. My heart breaks because I know how devastated I would be if Drake died.

  He reaches up to swipe a fingertip over my cheek to catch a tear. “I know you understand.”

  I nod. “I think I do.”

  He slides his hand to one of mine. Cradling it, he continues, “I hit a brick wall emotionally that day. I couldn’t take it anymore. I left Manhattan with Pol that afternoon, and I never looked back.”

  My breath stalls as I take that in. Maybe I heard him wrong.

  Pushing a piece of hair behind my ear, he looks into my eyes. “Pol was cremated. I took him home to California. My grandfather and I spread his ashes in the ocean. He loved to surf, so it’s what he would have wanted.”

  ***

  A dark cloud has settled over Manhattan again.

  I stare out the window as rain beats against the glass. People on the sidewalk below are searching for cover. They want solace from the rainstorm.

  It’s what Case wants too. He wants a break from the storm that has been raging inside of him for years.

  I understand why California is home to him now.

  His family is there. His grandfather and in a very important sense, his brother is too.

  “You’re sure I can’t get you anything, Emma?”

  I turn to watch him walk back into the living room. He put on sweatpants and grabbed a glass of water.

  After he told me about Pol’s ashes, he kissed my cheek and told me he needed a minute.

  I didn’t question him, even though all I wanted was to hold him forever.

  I can’t erase his pain, but I can help him carry it.

  Burdens are heavy if they rest solely on your shoulders.

  “I’m good, thank you.” I make my way closer to where he’s standing next to the dining room table.

  He lifts the glass and downs half the water in one swallow. “How are you doing? This was a lot for you to take in.”

  I close the distance between us until I’m standing next to him. “I’m good. I’m glad you shared that with me.”

  “You are?” he asks before he finishes the water. “Why?”

  Watching him place the glass on the table, I take a minute to sort my thoughts. “It helps me understand you. I knew you were in pain.”

  “It’s that obvious?” His gaze darts to me.

  “It’s in your eyes,” I say softly. “There’s a sad story there.”

  With a nod, he reaches to run his finger over my chin. “Beautiful, compassionate, and insightful Emma Owens. I didn’t stand a chance, did I?”

  “A chance?” I search his face for clarity. “What do you mean?”

  Is he falling for me too? Is his heart in free fall the way mine is?

  He glances at the table again. With a step forward, he taps his finger on the edge of the picture of Drake and Jane. “I haven’t seen this. Drake sent it to you?”

  Frustrated that our conversation has shifted in an entirely different direction, I sigh. “He did. I had that printed. I’m going to frame it for a wedding gift.”

  Reaching down, he carefully picks up the print. He tilts it slightly to the right and then the left. “Is this the only picture you have of them?”

  Stepping closer, I nod. “Yes. Why?”

  With a slight shake of his head, he looks at me. “She looks familiar.”

  “Jane looks familiar?” I lean in so I can gaze at the picture too. “You know her?”

  He moves the picture again. This time he brings it closer to his face. “It’s hard to tell.”

  Anxiety pricks its way up my spine. I don’t know anything about Jane other than she’s now my sister-in-law. “I can ask Drake for another picture of them at the wedding.”

  I offer that to appease not only Case’s curiosity but mine too.

  “We’ll meet her soon enough.” He drops the picture. “I’ve never met a woman named Jane, so I think it’s safe to say I don’t know her.”

  It’s not safe to say anything. A month ago, I would have said it’s safe to say my brother would live in New York forever and stay single for years.

  “Enough about Drake.” Case tilts my chin up. “I need to go to work, Emma.”

  I glance at the picture one last time before I focus on him. “I’ll frame the wedding photo and find something else to do.”

  “I’ll have the contract to you by the end of the day.”

  Startled, I search his face for a clue about where exactly I’ll be working. “By the end of the day, today?”

  He nods. “I want you to have dinner with me so we can discuss it.”

  This sounds too business-like to be an invitation to move to San Francisco with him.

  My heart drops inside my chest. “Okay. You’ll let me know where and when?”

  He presses his lips to my cheek. “I’ll text you as soon as I have the contract in hand.”

  Why does this feel like the first step in a very painful goodbye?

  “I’ll be waiting to hear from you,” I say softly.

  With another soft kiss to my cheek, he turns and heads down the hallway to his bedroom. When the door shuts behind him, I look toward the windows.

  As raindrops hit the glass, tears flow down my cheeks.

  I knew this would hurt, but I had no idea how badly.

  Chapter 59

  Emma

  I march up Park Avenue on my way to nowhere.

  After I left Case’s apartment, I sent a group text to Bella and Delaney to see what they’re up to.

  I know both of them have to work today, but I’m hoping at least one of them can spare me an hour at lunch.

  I don’t know that I’ll confess anything to them about what I’m feeling concerning Case and me, but I need a friendly face and a chance to escape from the sadness I feel.

  My time with Case is going to be over soon.

  Drake and Jane will come back to New York, and then the three of us will fly to Seattle to finally tell my parents about the secret wedding.

  I’ll share my news too.

  I’m going to work at Cabbott. I’ll be moving to a new city.

  This is the next chapter in my life. I should be over the moon, but I’m feeling nothing but loss.

  I maneuver around a couple standing in the middle of the sidewalk. Their embrace is beautiful and tender in a way that speaks of deep love.

  I slow as I move past them, taking in the expression on the man’s face as he stares at the woman.

  It’s pure joy.

  “Emma? Is that you?”

  Startled to hear my name, I stop in place and spin in a circle.

  I don’t recognize the voice until I hear it again. “I’m over here.”

  I glance to the left to find Ruth with her hand in the air. She’s exiting the same building she disappeared into the other day.

  “Ruth.” I approach her with a smile on my face. “I didn’t expect to see you again.”

  She steals a look at the couple. They’re now walking down the sidewalk hand-in-hand. “Did you see that? The way he looked at her reminds me of Tommy. He always had that same look on his face right before he kissed me.”

  I want memories like that too.

  I have some with Case, but I want more.
I want a lifetime’s worth.

  “They seem very happy,” I reply. “How are you?”

  “Late,” she confesses on a laugh. “I’m headed to the airport.”

  I glance down at the suitcase by her side.

  Laughing, she jerks a thumb over her shoulder. “The doorman is bringing most of my luggage. I’m planning on staying in Ireland for a month.”

  “Ireland?” My gaze flicks over her face.

  “You’re the inspiration for this trip.” She slides her hand over my shoulder. “When you mentioned your brother getting married in Ireland, it reminded me of a promise I made to Tommy.”

  “What promise is that?”

  “I promised him I’d make our dreams come true.” She glances down at the double heart ring on her finger. “We planned to see the world, but that didn’t happen, so it’s time for me to make those dreams a reality.”

  Speechless, I stare at her.

  “You helped me see that it’s never too late to do what makes you happy.” Her arms reach around to pull me into a quick hug. “I wouldn’t be taking this trip if it wasn’t for you.”

  I take comfort in knowing that I helped her chase after a dream.

  “I hope you’ll do the same.” She reaches for my hand. “If a life with that young man is your dream, make it happen, Emma.”

  She can’t know how much I want my dream to come true. I want a life with Case. “What if it’s not his dream?”

  “Ask him.” She smiles at the doorman as he passes us by with the luggage cart. “My car is here so I do need to run, but promise me you’ll tell him how you feel.”

  I can’t promise that.

  I don’t want to burden Case with my feelings. He has enough to wade through.

  “I promise I’ll think about it,” I say to appease her. “I hope this trip is everything you want it to be.”

  “With my Tommy in my heart, it’ll be the trip of a lifetime.” She rests a hand against her cheek. “I’ll go to a pub and toast to my love.”

  She spins around and starts toward the waiting SUV. Just as she’s about to slide into the back seat, she turns one last time to face me. “Tell him how you feel, Emma. I wish I would have done it when I was as young as you.”

  I wave a hand in response as she gets in the car, and it drives away, disappearing around the corner.

  ***

  “My cousin Chloe Scott is the woman for this job.” Bella’s gaze darts up from her purse. “I’m sure I have one of her business cards in here.”

  “She’s a lawyer?” I ask. “Does she handle contracts?”

  “Yes, and yes.” Bella punctuates her answer with two nods of her chin.

  When I mentioned to Bella that I had been offered a job at Cabbott, she squealed. That turned into a groan when I told her that I might not be working in New York.

  Marti rushed over to see what the fuss was, but Bella played it off as nothing.

  Her grandma didn’t buy any of it, but she’s now in the kitchen of Calvetti’s preparing us each a plate of cheese ravioli with meat sauce.

  “Marti will want to push another of my cousins on you if she thinks there’s a chance you’re about to become a New Yorker.” Bella chews on the end of a breadstick. “I’d tell her you’re not single, but you haven’t said a word about where things stand with you and Case.”

  I pick up a breadstick from the basket in the middle of the table too. “He lives in San Francisco, and I don’t think he’s offering me a job there.”

  “But you don’t know for sure, right?” She tugs her phone closer to her. “I have Chloe’s number. I’ll call and give her a heads-up that you’ll be reaching out to her.”

  I’m grateful that Bella is helping me find a lawyer. I didn’t know where to start. Elias sent me a list of names, but I haven’t looked it over yet.

  “For selfish reasons I’m hoping the job is in Manhattan.” Bella sighs. “But, I want it to be in California, Emma. I want you to have a chance with Case.”

  “Lunch is served.” Marti approaches from the left. “Two plates of spinach lasagna for two beautiful girls.”

  “Marti.” Bella looks up at her grandma as she places the dishes of steaming hot pasta in front of us. “I thought you were bringing ravioli.”

  “Surprise, my Bella.” She laughs. “This is delicious. You’ll thank me later.”

  I laugh as I dive a fork into the cheesy goodness. “I’ll thank you now, Marti.”

  “You’re welcome.” She leans down to press a kiss to my forehead. “You enjoy every last bite.”

  When she walks away, Bella circles the fork in her hand in front of my face. “You have a pink lipstick imprint front and center on your forehead.”

  “Good.” I laugh, reaching for my phone to snap a selfie. “It’s a perfect reminder of how incredible your grandma is.”

  “Take the picture and then eat.” Bella points at my pasta. “After lunch, we’re going to connect you with Chloe, so you have the best of the best on your side when you negotiate with Case.”

  I don’t want to negotiate with him. I want us to be on the same page.

  Working with Case in California is what I want more than anything, but I don’t want a lawyer to help me get that. I want the offer to come straight from Case’s heart.

  Chapter 60

  Case

  As I sit at Drake’s desk, I read Emma’s contract over for the third time.

  “Is it correct, Case?” Maureen Townsend, the lead counsel for Cabbott Mobile, taps her pen against her palm. “You’ve been staring at it for thirty minutes.”

  That’s because I’m taking a leap of faith.

  I feel like I’m about to attempt a jump over the Grand Canyon without a running start and no safety net.

  I read the paragraph about the location of the position again.

  It’s the address for Cabbott Mobile in San Francisco.

  Emma’s office will be next to mine.

  I want her next to me in bed when I wake up every morning.

  “The salary is generous,” Maureen says.

  She wants to fill the silence. It’s the same thing she did after Pol died. She talked and talked about nothing when I asked her to come to my office a week after he died.

  I needed her to work her magic to cancel my purchase of the apartment on Madison Avenue. Before she could do that, Drake worked his magic, and I agreed to move in.

  I’m thankful for that now.

  It brought Emma into my life. There’s no way in hell Drake would have tried to pass the two-bedroom walkup on the Lower East Side off as his own.

  “It’s fine,” I finally say. “I need to order pizza and pick up some cupcakes.”

  Her thin lips perk up in a grin. “Cupcakes? Don’t you detest sweet things?”

  I laugh. “I’ve changed, Maureen.”

  She takes a step forward. “You should thank whoever is responsible for that.”

  Pushing back from my desk, I stand so I can give her a hug.

  “What was that for?” She smiles.

  “For helping me get through the darkness seven years ago.” I point at the contract on my desk. “And for helping make my dreams come true.”

  She pats my cheek. “I’d do it all again in a heartbeat. I know it hasn’t been easy, Case.”

  “Loss never is.”

  She contemplates my words. “Grief runs on its own schedule. I get the sense that you’re edging toward brighter days.”

  Before I can say anything in response, her hand is in the air. “I’m not saying that you’ll ever stop grieving, but you’re turning a corner. I can see it, and nothing could make me happier.”

  “I am turning a corner,” I affirm with a nod. “I have someone special to thank for that.”

  “I think I know who.” She presses a finger to her lips. “I’m bound by client and lawyer privilege. No one will get those details out of me, not even Drake.”

  I raise a brow in response. “He’ll know soon enough.”

/>   He will. I plan on telling my best friend that his sister owns my heart.

  “Are you as surprised as I am that he’s marrying Jane?” She lets a laugh spill out of her. “I thought they hated each other.”

  My brows perch together. “I have no fucking idea who Jane is.”

  The laughter slows as her eyes skim my face. “You know Jane.”

  “I don’t.” I shrug. “I’ve never met a Jane.”

  Something shifts in her expression. “She was an intern at Cabbott, Case. It was years ago.”

  “Seven years ago?” I question.

  Her gaze drops. “I guess it was around that time, yes.”

  “Shit.” I drag a hand through my hair. “Why don’t I remember her?”

  “You had very little to do with her.” She rests a hand on my shoulder. “She was assigned to Drake. They couldn’t get along. She finally left after a couple of months.”

  I try to drag up a memory of Jane, but I come up blank. Grief might be to blame for that, but it’s no excuse.

  “She stopped in last fall to see Drake to apologize for giving him a hard time.” A smile tugs on the corners of her lips. “It wasn’t love at first sight, but there was something there. You know what they say about there being a fine line between love and hate.”

  “Does he seem happy?”

  “Happier than I’ve ever seen him.” She drops her hand in front of her. “Almost as happy as you are.”

  I’ll be happier if things go my way tonight.

  “Have a copy of the contract sent to my apartment.” I adjust my suit jacket. “Seal the envelope. I don’t want the doorman getting his eyes on it.”

  “Done.” She nods. “Anything else?”

  “Take the rest of the day off.” I surprise both of us with that statement.

  “That I can do.” She sets off out of my office with a spring in her step.

  I look down at my phone. I type in the name of the bakery Emma loves into the search bar.

  Sweet Bluebells is on the Upper West Side.

  I’ll head there, grab two red velvet cupcakes, and then make my way to the apartment.