After the Fire

by Felice Stevens

  An hour later, they tumbled back into the house. Luke let Sasha off her leash as soon as they were inside the front door, and she made a beeline for the kitchen. He could hear her slurping the water from her bowl. Cold water sounded like heaven, so he grabbed a bottle from the refrigerator and wandered back into the front room, where Tash stared at his phone, taking notes in a small notepad.

  With a satisfied grunt, he dropped into a chair and stretched out his legs. It had been a jumbled, nerve-racking day, and Luke was glad Jordan could sleep. Hopefully when Jordan woke up, his body could better adjust to the treatment. Luke closed his eyes.

  “Luke, Luke.” From a distance, he heard his name. Blinking and yawning, he stretched, then opened his eyes to see Tash standing over him, silhouetted by the glow of the sconces that flanked the door. The light glowed soft and golden, glinting off Tash’s glasses, which he’d pushed up to rest on top of his head.

  “Hmm, what time is it?”

  “After six. You were in such a deep sleep I didn’t want to wake you. I checked on Jordan, and he’s still sleeping. I need to run home, feed my cats, and check my mail. I’ll be back later tonight. Jordan should sleep awhile longer; then he can eat a light meal.”

  He could handle that. And the guys were coming over, so he wouldn’t be alone in case Jordan needed him. “I can run out for a few minutes, right? Like to walk the dog and around the corner to the store for a little while?

  “Sure. He’s not ill, understand that. He simply needs looking after, and you’re doing fine.” Tash slipped the glasses back on and met his gaze. “For a while I had my doubts about you. It hurt Jordan when you left him that night.”

  “I know. You needn’t go into it.” His reaction still shamed him, and Luke’s anger rose a bit at Tash’s lecture. Then Luke remembered Jordan sleeping upstairs and how Jordan had suffered over the past year. “I’m sorry I was short. We’ve made our peace, and we’re in a good place now. He doesn’t ever have to worry about me again.”

  “Well, that’s good to know.” Jordan leaned against the doorway, his hair mussed and sticking up in several directions, but his eyes shone clear and bright.

  Luke jumped out of his chair and rushed over to him. “Why didn’t you call out for help? You could’ve fallen.”

  Jordan made a face. “I’m not sick; you heard Tash. I feel much better now that I’ve slept. And yeah, you need to walk Sash and get stuff for everyone else when they come later. I’ve got nothing in the house, not even beer.” He kissed Luke. “Go on, seriously. I feel good and I’m going to take a shower.” With Sasha following at his feet, he trudged up the stairs.

  Tash had already put on his jacket. “He’ll be fine, Luke. Give him some space.” He checked his watch. “You’re okay with me leaving, right?”

  “Yeah. I’ll run out now while he’s in the shower. It shouldn’t take me longer than half an hour.” Luke walked Tash to the door. “Thanks for everything.” He held out his hand. “I was wrong about you as well. You’ve been a great friend to both of us.”

  Tash shook his hand, a rueful smile on his lips. “I’m not that nice. If you hadn’t come back, I would have waited until Jordan was no longer in my care, then asked him out.” Laugh lines fanned out from the corners of his eyes. “Don’t worry, though. I know when I’ve lost.”

  Well, damn. Give the guy points for honesty if nothing else. Luke closed the door and sprinted up the stairs, calling out to Jordan. “Hey, Prep School. I’m heading out to the store.”

  Jordan started the shower and yelled out over the spray. “See you when you get back.”

  Sasha sat at the foot of the stairs, giving him pathetic doggie eyes. “Yes, I’m taking you for a walk, but you can’t come into the store.”

  Obviously, she didn’t care, as she raced to the front door, stubby tail wagging. He snapped on her leash, and they headed outside into the darkening night.

  Unfortunately, everyone else in New York City seemed to have picked the same time and place to shop, so it was closer to an hour by the time Luke escaped the supermarket and he hurried down the block, anxious to get back. As they approached the house, Sasha growled and whined, pulling at her leash.

  “Stop it. We’ll be inside in a moment.” Luke, juggling two bags, didn’t have the strongest hold on her leash, and with one strong tug, she pulled free and raced to the house, barking her head off. The hair on the back of his neck stood up as he saw her enter through the open front door he remembered locking before he’d left.

  “Fuck.” He dropped the bags on the sidewalk, unconcerned about the food spilling out. “Jordan.” He pounded up the steps to the house and ran inside. “Jordan, where the hell are you?”

  Chapter Twenty-Three

  Luke’s sneakers crunched on the broken glass in the entranceway. He nearly tripped over himself as he sprinted up the stairs. Following the sounds of Sasha barking and crying, he skidded into the bedroom and stopped short. “Fuck me, no.” Jordan lay crumpled on the floor, his face battered and bloody. His arms rested over his head as if he’d tried to protect himself from further blows. Fortunately, Luke could see the subtle rise and fall of Jordan’s breath in his chest.

  “Hey, Prep School, can you hear me?” He dropped to his knees next to Jordan’s too-still body. It was only then that he saw the blood seeping into the rug beneath Jordan’s head, and he froze. “Shit, fuck.” He pulled out his cell phone and dialed 911, reporting the break-in and that they needed an ambulance. The next call he made was to Tash.

  “Hey, Luke, what’s—”

  “Listen.” There was no time for small talk. “There was a break-in while I was gone. Jordan’s been attacked, and he’s unconscious. I called the ambulance, and they’re on their way.”

  “Okay. They’ll take him to Beth Israel, so I’ll meet you there.”

  Luke disconnected and listened for the wail of sirens but heard nothing. “Come on, you fuckers. What’s taking so long?” Luke checked Jordan again and let out a relieved sigh to see he still breathed steadily.

  He remembered that Jordan’s friends were coming and knew he’d have to call and tell them what happened. Since he didn’t have Drew’s number on his phone, he picked up Jordan’s cell phone from the floor and scrolled through until he found it. After only a split second hesitation he hit the Call button.

  “Hey, Jordan, we were about to leave. What’s up?”

  And of course, since this was the worst fucking day of his life in years, Ash had to answer Drew’s phone.

  “It’s Luke. I need to speak to Drew.”

  “Luke.” Ash’s voice turned sharp, all humor gone. “What’s wrong?”

  Fuck it. “It’s Jordan. The house was broken into while I was out, and he was attacked.” Now he heard the sirens. “Look, the ambulance is here; I have to go. They’ll take him to Beth Israel.”

  “We’ll meet you there.”

  Luke clicked off and ran downstairs. He’d never been so happy to see the red-and-white FDNY EMS truck as he was at that moment. “In here,” he yelled as he watched the two EMS techs jump out. “He’s upstairs.”

  After pulling out a collapsible stretcher and a medical bag, they followed him up the stairs to the bedroom. Luke stepped aside as they took over. One of the guys, heavily tattooed and bald, knelt at Jordan’s feet; the other, lanky with a thin goatee, stood by his head.

  “Is he on any medication that you know of?” This from the tattooed EMS worker, whose name tag read Caruso.

  “Yeah. He started taking flumazenil this morning. He’s being treated for Xanax dependency.”

  “Okay. Anything else? Who are you, a friend?” The guy with the goatee, Hernandez, was taking notes. “Were you the one who called it in?”

  “Yes. I’d gone out to the store. We were having friends over for dinner. When I got back, the dog went crazy and ran up here and I followed her.” He swallowed hard. “Is he going to be all right?”

  Caruso didn’t answer. “Luis, get the stretcher.” Hernandez spe
d out to the hallway, and Caruso snapped on a pair of thin rubber gloves.

  After checking Jordan’s pulse and blood pressure, Caruso turned to him. “Any other medical issues?”

  “No, none.”

  Hernandez came back in then, and begrudgingly, Luke had to admit they got Jordan on the stretcher and down the stairs within minutes. Except for a few moans, Jordan didn’t make a sound. When Luke tried to get into the ambulance, Hernandez stopped him.

  “Sorry, sir, you can’t come with us. Family only.”

  Unwilling to hold them up, Luke merely nodded and watched them drive away, the red taillights receding, taking his heart with them.

  By the time Luke arrived at the hospital, Jordan had already been whisked into an examining room in the ER. He jammed his hands into his pockets and nervously rocked back and forth on the balls of his feet as he waited to speak with the woman at the desk.

  “I’m sorry, sir, but I have no information on his condition at the moment.” She offered him nothing more than a sympathetic smile. “Have a seat, and I’ll let you know when his status changes.”

  Frustrated, he jerked a nod of thanks and stalked back to the row of uncomfortable plastic chairs and slumped down in one of the few vacant ones available. As usual, would-be patients and their families crowded the emergency room. It had been over ten years since he’d set foot in a hospital and the harsh, antiseptic smell remained as familiar as his aftershave, overtaking his senses. It evoked the dark memories of the night he’d been brought in, broken and bloodied after that cataclysmic fight between him and his foster father. Even now, he struggled for air, recalling the days of pain that followed. How alone he’d been when only Mrs. Cartwright from down the road had come by to see him, to tell him his “family” had left in the middle of the night and no one knew where they’d disappeared to.

  No fucking way would he allow his head games to start now. Luke squeezed his eyes shut, willing away thoughts of the past. All his concentration needed to focus on Jordan.

  “Luke.”

  He opened his eyes to see Drew and Ash in front of him.

  “I don’t know anything. They won’t tell me. You could find out though, Drew.” Luke jumped out of the chair and grabbed the man by his arm. “Come on. You’re a doctor; they’ll let you in to see him. Excuse me.” He pulled Drew over to the woman behind the desk. “This is Dr. Klein. He’s a friend of Dr. Peterson, who I came in with. He can go in and see him, right?”

  Drew showed her his credentials, and she nodded. “He’s in room three, Doctor. Through those doors and past the nurses’ station.”

  “Thank you.” Drew gave her a brief smile, then led Luke back to the waiting area. And Ash. “You wait here, and I’ll be out as soon as I can.” Drew surprised Luke by pulling him close in a short, hard hug. “Don’t worry. Jordan’s not going anywhere except home with you.” He walked swiftly through the swinging doors, and then Luke was alone.

  With Ash.

  He expected to have to make excuses not to talk to Ash, but his fears were unwarranted as Ash sat in a vacant seat. A faint yet sardonic smile crossed his lips. “I’m not going to try and speak to you; don’t worry. There’s a time and a place for everything, Luke. This qualifies as neither.”

  Feeling as if a small weight had been lifted from his shoulders, Luke collapsed into a chair. “Thank you for that.” Jordan’s face rose in his mind.

  See? You can do it. Remember what I said the other night. I fucking love you. Own it; take control of it. You’re stronger than your fear.

  As if a switch had turned on inside him, it all clicked into place. Not knowing Jordan’s condition, whether he was critically injured, made Luke take stock of himself and his own life. What purpose did his hatred of Ash serve? They couldn’t go back. But maybe they could use this tragedy—or he could, at least—to make himself stronger and move on from his anger. He loved Jordan. He was certain of that fact, and if loving him meant putting up with seeing Ash occasionally, it was worth it to keep Jordan in his life.

  “Hey, Ash?” Luke almost laughed at the look of shock on Ash’s face.

  “Yes?” Ash’s cautious voice wavered.

  “Hopefully, Jordan will come out of this and be home soon.” Luke took a deep breath. Although he’d made the decision to put it out in the open between them, the reality of saying it proved harder than he’d imagined. A drop of cold sweat trickled down his back. “I’d, um, I’d like us, along with Drew and Jordan, to get together one night. To talk.”

  Ash blanched, turning into a marble statue. His pale eyes glittered in the harsh fluorescent light of the waiting room. “This isn’t some sort of cruel joke you’re playing on me, is it?”

  “No.” Luke shook his head. “Sometimes it takes a crisis to see what’s important.” He stared off, unseeing, into space. “Nothing’s more important to me now than making sure Jordan is all right. I finally get what you feel for Drew.”

  Ash’s lips curved. “Scary as shit, isn’t it?”

  Luke joined him in that smile. “Yeah. It sure is.”

  They sat in silence. Luke remained fixated on the swinging doors where he’d seen Drew disappear. One hour turned into two. Before he’d come to the hospital, Luke had contacted Mike and Rachel, and they’d picked up Sasha to bring her home with them. Rachel had texted him, letting him know Sasha had settled in fine, and that Mike was on his way over to the hospital.

  After another half an hour, where Luke thought he’d jump out of his skin every time the door swung open, Mike had shown up, so the three of them sat around together, feeling useless, Luke thought bitterly.

  “What’s taking so fucking long?” Lucas couldn’t stand sitting anymore and paced the small waiting area. “It’s been hours already. He must be worse than we thought.”

  “He isn’t the only patient. They probably had to take him for X-rays and then wait to read the results.” Mike’s attempt to reason with him failed, as he felt no better.

  “He’s too damn stubborn to let a knock on the head keep him down.” Ash flashed him a quick smile. “He’s probably being his usual obnoxious self to the nurses.”

  Luke remained unconvinced. “I have a bad feeling.” The doors swung open, and Drew made his appearance, looking worn-out and disheveled, but ultimately all Luke could see was the smile on his face. He ran over to Drew and skidded to a stop in front of him.

  “Well, tell me? Is he going to be okay? Is he awake?”

  Drew put up his hands. “Whoa. Let me tell you what I know.” He waved to Mike and Ash. “Both of you come.” He led the three of them to a more secluded section of the waiting area.

  “He has a slight concussion and severely bruised ribs. They kicked him pretty badly in his side, so the doctor needed to make sure he wasn’t bleeding internally from any ruptured organs.”

  “Was he?” Luke held his breath.

  “No, thank God.”

  Drew paused and took a moment to rub his eyes. Luke could tell how drained he was, not only physically but emotionally. It struck him then that by falling in love with Jordan, he’d inherited an entire family in Mike, Rachel, Drew, and Esther. Funny how that didn’t seem to rankle him as much as it had before.

  Ash put his arms around Drew, and Drew sank back into the larger man’s embrace. The tenderness between them went beyond anything physical. It spoke in the way Drew relaxed against Ash’s chest and the brief brush of Ash’s lips in Drew’s hair. Something about the unassuming Drew Klein had so ensnared Ash he’d completely turned his life around and, more importantly, fallen in love.

  Now the same thing had happened to him. Jordan completely shocked his senses, giving him something he never thought to have. A second chance. A home. They’d both been burned so badly, so hurt and beaten down by what life had thrown in their paths, that they’d scarcely recognized when the real thing hit them in the face.

  “Is he awake? Can I see him?” Luke bounced on his feet, nervous and dancing as if he stood on the head of a lit match.<
br />
  “Yeah. Tash is back there with him now.” Drew kissed Ash and took Luke by the elbow, leading him through the swinging doors. “You won’t be able to stay long, but I know he’ll be happy to see you.”

  Luke swallowed hard, breathing through his mouth, so he didn’t have to smell the noxious fumes of ether, antiseptic, and bleach. He kept his eyes trained on the top of Drew’s dark head. The beeping of the machines, the moans of the patients, and the blare of the overhead speakers melded together until he could only hear a low whine playing in his head.

  Shit. I hope I don’t get sick.

  They came before a curtained-off area. “He’s in here. They don’t have a room for him yet.” Drew pulled the curtain and stepped aside. “Jordy. Someone’s here to see you.”

  Luke hesitated, then grinned to himself when he heard Jordan’s irritable voice. “Who is it? Christ, D. You didn’t let Ash in here, did you? My head already hurts.”

  Peering around Drew’s shoulder, Luke winced at the sight of Jordan, pale and bandaged. “Hey, Prep School. How’re you feeling?” Black anger welled up inside of him at the thought of anyone laying hands on Jordan, touching him, hurting him. For everyone’s sake, he swallowed down the rage threatening to swamp him with bloodlust.

  “Like shit. I have a massive headache, my side is killing me, and I’m freezing.” The smile Jordan aimed his way belied his complaints. “But I wouldn’t mind if you came closer, you know.”

  As he entered the small space, Luke saw Tash standing off to the side, and acknowledged him, but focused his attention mainly on Jordan. “Try not to talk. You need your rest.” It hurt his heart to see Jordan laid out in the bed, on sheets merely a shade whiter than the pallor of his skin.

  “Yes, I know. But I need you to rest properly, so come here already.” In his typical impatient fashion, Jordan waved his hand at Luke, beckoning him closer. “I’m not going to break. Tell him, D.”