The Bull Rider's Fresh Start

by Heidi McCahan

  She glanced at the clock on the mantel. “I was really hoping to get on the road after supper.”

  No. Way. He wanted to stomp his foot like his friend Gage’s son, Connor, did when he didn’t get his way. Instead, he calmly ran his fingertips along his jaw. “How many hours have you been traveling? You must be exhausted. Should you really be driving in a storm at night with a baby?”

  Irritation flickered in her eyes.

  “I’m sure you’re anxious to see your folks and all.” He stopped short of mentioning her stepfather’s stroke. “Get some rest and we’ll map out a plan tomorrow.”

  Kelsey stared him down. His mind raced, already scrambling for a backup strategy to convince her to stay in case she refused.

  “All right.” She relented. “Just for tonight.”

  “I’ll be back as soon as I can.” He sidestepped another confrontation and grabbed his keys on the way out the door.

  Outside, rain spattered his face as he jogged toward his truck parked beside Kelsey’s rental car. Doubt tormented him. Letting Kelsey and Adeline spend some time together was the right thing to do. Wasn’t it?

  He climbed into the truck’s cab then started the engine. Hesitating, he glanced at the house one more time. She’d stay, wouldn’t she?

  Guilt mixed with the doubt, drawing another frustrated groan as he shifted the truck into gear. He had no business questioning Kelsey’s trustworthiness, given the way he’d misled, fibbed and failed to show up too many times while he’d been addicted to pills. Yet she’d kept Adeline a secret.

  Adeline. He was someone’s dad. This news shifted his whole world. Now he had an even stronger motivation to stay clean and sober.

  He wasn’t going to lose his daughter.

  Chapter Three

  Kelsey blinked against the bright light streaming into the unfamiliar bedroom. As the picture on the opposite wall came into focus, reality parted the dense fog of her deep sleep.

  Adeline.

  Kelsey fumbled for her phone buried under the covers. Nine fifteen. How had she slept for almost eleven hours? And why didn’t she hear Adeline cry? Did she sleep through the night? Was she still breathing?

  The questions flooded her mind as she sat up, flung the covers aside and stumbled to the portable crib. It was empty. Panic squeezed her chest. Where was her baby?

  Landon had taken her. He sneaked in during the night, scooped Adeline up and—

  Stop. Calm down. Just breathe. She coached herself out of a full-on freak-out while she yanked a sweatshirt from her suitcase then slipped it on over her pajamas. Her feet slapped against the hardwood as she hurried down the hallway. Pausing in the kitchen, she quickly scanned the groceries that Landon had brought last night still stacked on the counter. The high chair in the corner beside the oval table sat empty. She surveyed the rest of the kitchen, hoping to see a dirty dish or an empty bottle. Some evidence that Landon had been here. Nope. Nothing. A throbbing ache in her forehead reminded her she’d gone far too long without any caffeine. That would have to wait. She had to find her daughter.

  Where had Landon taken her?

  They should’ve exchanged phone numbers last night. She’d been too exhausted to think clearly. He’d left after he dropped off the groceries. She shouldn’t have trusted him. Now he was probably long gone.

  She quickly trounced the negative thoughts. There had to be a more plausible explanation. If he’d left town with Adeline, why leave all the baby food, diapers and formula behind? She didn’t remember meeting Landon’s parents at Wade and Maggie’s wedding, but that wouldn’t stop her from marching over to their house and asking about their son and granddaughter.

  They knew about Adeline, didn’t they?

  She found her flip-flops by the front door and slipped them on. Landon said they lived close. She assumed that meant walking distance. Hopefully it wasn’t far. She wasn’t thrilled about meeting them in her pajamas, but she couldn’t waste time changing clothes.

  She yanked open the front door, and a wall of hot air enveloped her.

  “Good morning.”

  Landon’s deep voice startled her, and she yelped. She turned slowly, following the subtle creaking sound. He sat on the wooden swing at the far end of the porch, rocking with Adeline snuggled in his arms.

  Relief washed over her.

  “Hey.” She found her voice and padded toward them, noting the empty bottle on the porch beside the swing. Adeline slept, her pink mouth wide-open and chubby arms nested across her chest. The picture of contentment. Kelsey tried not to let her gaze linger on Landon’s tanned forearms or the red T-shirt hugging his muscular shoulders. She shouldn’t have allowed her eyes to wander to the appealing planes of his clean-shaven face either.

  Her pulse sped as his hazel eyes met hers. The tip of his mouth curved up in a half smile—almost as if he’d caught her staring.

  “Sleep well?”

  She nodded, crossing her arms over the navy logo on her sweatshirt. “Except I was so worried when I woke up and she wasn’t in the crib.”

  His smile faded. “I came by at five thirty, and she was starting to fuss. I thought I’d let you sleep. I’m sorry if I worried you.”

  His kindness sent a feeling of warmth zipping through her. Now she really regretted wearing the bulky sweatshirt. She had no idea Colorado was this hot in the summer.

  “My mom brought you some breakfast.” Landon held up something wrapped in aluminum foil. “Do you like breakfast burritos?”

  “I’ll eat anything,” she said, resisting the urge to snatch the food from his hands.

  “There’s a travel mug with coffee under the swing.” He passed her the burrito. “If you like cream and sugar, I have both inside.”

  “Thank you.” She took the food. Why was he being so nice? “My head is about to explode from lack of caffeine.”

  “Well, we can’t have that.” Landon tapped the porch with his boot to stop the swing’s momentum. “Grab the coffee and have a seat.”

  She hesitated, then picked up the silver insulated mug and sank onto the wide wooden slats beside him.

  Her heart expanded at the sight of her baby girl asleep in his arms. She couldn’t stop staring at Adeline’s flawless porcelain skin or the rosy-pink color on her smooth cheeks. Even her yellow-and-white-striped pajamas were adorable.

  Landon chuckled and shifted Adeline in his arms like he held a fragile bouquet of delicate flowers. “She’s perfect, right?”

  “Sure is.” Her words fell woefully short of describing the love she felt for her daughter. Their daughter. But thinking for long about the child they’d created together sent her tiptoeing into dangerous territory. Enemy territory.

  She unwrapped the burrito and took a generous bite. Mainly because she was famished and eating kept her from speaking and aligning with Landon any more than she already had.

  They rocked in silence while she savored the explosion of flavors in her burrito. The scrambled eggs, cheese and a hint of spicy sausage tasted incredible. When was the last time someone had brought her breakfast? She couldn’t recall. As she reached for the coffee and took a sip, she sneaked another glance at Landon. While she couldn’t figure out his intentions, she had to admit he looked awfully good holding a baby. It definitely upped his appeal.

  Quit. This is the kind of thinking that only gets you in trouble. Remember?

  She averted her gaze, then savored a long sip of coffee and took another bite of her burrito. Across the dirt road, fields of wheat stretched in every direction, dancing in the breeze. Huge wind turbines dotted the land. Their silver blades caught the sunlight and glinted as they spun.

  Despite the shade of the porch, a rivulet of sweat trickled down her spine.

  “I can hold Adeline for a few more minutes, then I need to get to work,” Landon said.

  “Where do you work?”

>   “Here.” He tipped his head toward the fields she’d just admired. “My family is prepping to harvest all that wheat.”

  “When?”

  “Probably in the next week or so.”

  “What are you going to do with Adeline?” Surely babies weren’t supposed to ride in combines or tractors.

  “I meant what I said last night. You and Adeline can stay here. We—”

  “No way.” Kelsey shot him her best you-have-got-to-be-kidding-me look. “We are not going to play house.”

  “You didn’t let me finish.” Landon kept his voice low but stopped the swing. “I’ll stay with my parents and you can stay here with Adeline.”

  She really, really wanted to say no. Her burrito sat half-finished in her hand. Her appetite had fled. “We aren’t a family, Landon. We barely know each other. Let’s stop pretending.”

  “I’m not pretending anything.” His voice grew strained. Adeline cried out, and they both stilled, paralyzed by the potential interruption in her nap. At least they agreed that her sleep took precedence.

  The chains creaked as Landon set the swing in motion again.

  “I want to go home,” Kelsey whispered.

  “You can go home, but you’re not taking Adeline.”

  Anger surged. “You can’t make that decision.”

  “Please, Kelsey.” His expression softened. “I just found out I’m her dad. Stay until harvest is over. Then we can make a plan, one we can both live with.”

  “I don’t want to stay in your house,” she said. It felt too intimate. Too personal.

  “My sister’s house is close by. I’ll ask her if you and Adeline can stay there for a little while.”

  “I don’t want to stay with your sister, either.”

  “She doesn’t live there. She’s married and has twins. They live in a house her husband already owned. Never mind. Long story. Her house is modern and more convenient for having a baby around and still has a lot of her furniture in it.”

  “Sounds too good to be true.” She tapped her fingertip on the top of the coffee mug. “What’s the catch?”

  Landon’s brow furrowed. “No catch. You can have your own space and we can both see Adeline.”

  She sighed. “I don’t know. This feels like a bizarre custody arrangement.”

  “That’s because this is a bizarre situation.”

  “I really want to go home and see my mom and stepdad, especially if my stepdad isn’t well.”

  “You can leave if you want. But Adeline stays with me.”

  You’re out of your mind. The harsh words zipped through her head. Somehow, she kept them from slipping out of her mouth. That would only escalate into a heated argument. And she didn’t want to fight. They couldn’t keep circling each other like two stubborn mules, though. There had to be a compromise.

  “I’m sorry about your stepdad’s stroke. And I hate that Wade and Maggie are gone,” Landon said. “Adeline’s lost a lot, too. She needs stability. Why not give her what she needs? Here she’ll have her mom and her dad, plus extended family to take care of her.”

  “She has family in Wyoming, too.” Kelsey twisted to face him. “I’m not taking her from you. You can visit whenever you want.”

  “Which means never.” Landon raked his fingers through his blond hair. “Your parents’ ranch is six hours away. I can’t drop by after work. Besides, you don’t get to be the only one who decides what’s best for our daughter.”

  Kelsey couldn’t argue with that. Or the part about Adeline needing stability. Why did he have to be so reasonable? She’d mentally prepared for charming. She’d expected the not-a-care-in-the-world version of Landon. What was she supposed to do with this prudent, logical version?

  “All right.” She pushed out a long breath. “Adeline and I will stay at your sister’s place, but only for two weeks. Then we’re going home.”

  * * *

  Two weeks.

  He had exactly two weeks to convince Kelsey that he was worthy of fatherhood and Adeline belonged with him. Not impossible, right? He’d conquered tougher obstacles than her fierce determination. And she was clearly determined to take Adeline back to Wyoming.

  Uneasiness slithered through him like a rattlesnake in a wheat field. She’d agreed to stay. That was almost too simple. He stole a sidelong glance. Kelsey looked stunning, even in her sweatshirt and gray gym shorts. Her dark hair tumbled in messy waves past her shoulders and her cheeks were flushed an appealing shade of pink.

  Sitting together on the porch swing while she drank her coffee and he held their baby teased him with a sneak peek of the kind of future he’d dreamed about. This nearly perfect scenario almost fooled him. Almost convinced him that he had a shot at a happily-ever-after. With her.

  “What changed your mind?”

  “What do you mean?”

  “When you got here last night, you couldn’t wait to leave and take Adeline with you. What did I say to change your mind?”

  Kelsey’s eyes narrowed. “Don’t give yourself too much credit, cowboy. I’m doing what’s best for Adeline. And you won’t convince me to stay longer, so don’t even try.”

  Ha. Challenge accepted. He dragged a hand over his face to smother a smile. “I was a bull rider, but those days are over.”

  “Do you miss it?”

  “Bull riding?” He lifted one shoulder, trying to dismiss her question. Her inquiry surprised him. And he didn’t want to talk about it. Not now. Not with her. He looked away, trapped in the memory of his last ride. Yeah, he missed doing the thing he was made to do. How could he not?

  The anticipation that hummed in his veins before the gate swung open and the bull shot into the arena in a bone-rattling trajectory. The heady rush of adrenaline as he fought to stay on the enraged animal, then the thrill of victory when the whistle blasted and the crowd roared. Success had brought many blessings, which he’d squandered on foolish investments and a cunning addiction.

  “It was a good ride,” he said quietly. “But that’s all in the past. Now I want to settle down and carry on the family tradition of farming this land.”

  There. He’d told her what he wanted. Now that he knew about Adeline, he’d refine his focus. Getting out of debt and providing for his daughter were his new priorities.

  “We’ll have to figure out how to coparent,” she said.

  Coparenting. Such a hollow word. He hated it already. Along with custody, paternity test and child support. All the unfamiliar terms he’d scrolled through on the internet when he’d stayed up way too late the night before, researching his options. Did he need to hire an attorney?

  “The clock’s ticking.” Kelsey plowed on before he formulated an answer. “I have fifty-seven days to establish a new family care plan and submit it to my commanding officer.”

  “And if you don’t?”

  “If I don’t what?”

  “If you don’t submit the care plan or whatever it’s called. What will happen?”

  “I’ll be discharged without benefits.”

  “What?” Her words slammed into him. “That’s crazy.”

  “It’s the truth. Involuntary separation by reason of parenthood.” She sighed. “I won’t let that happen. I need the health insurance, the housing, all the benefits. Plus, I want to take advantage of the GI Bill when I’m out of the navy so I can go to nursing school.”

  “You lose all that if you don’t prove your child is well cared for?”

  She nodded. “The military wants confirmation that I’ll honor my service commitment and that my child is safe and thriving.”

  “How much longer are you enlisted for?”

  “I can get out in October of next year.”

  He mentally calculated the time. Fifteen months? That was way too long to shuffle Adeline back and forth like a piece of cargo. Yet another reason why
he wanted her to stay here with him.

  His phone chimed from where he’d left it balanced on the porch railing. “That’s probably my dad checking in. We need a part for the combine, and I promised him I’d run to town and pick it up.”

  “Oh.”

  Was she disappointed? Seemed like she’d be more than happy to have some time alone. Time without him around, anyway. He shot her another glance. Her gaze slid to Adeline, still asleep in his arms. “I’ll hold her.”

  He stood and carefully transferred Adeline into Kelsey’s waiting arms. He held his breath, willing her to stay asleep. When his fingers brushed against Kelsey’s, he stepped back, eager to put some distance between them.

  She stared down at Adeline, her mouth tipping up in a half smile. Landon pushed out a long breath and turned to leave.

  “Landon?”

  He hesitated. The sound of his name on her lips halted his steps.

  “Thanks for breakfast.”

  “You’re welcome.” He didn’t turn around. His boots clomped on the porch as he left the house and strode toward his truck.

  The morning sun warmed his skin. He slid behind the wheel, turned the key in the ignition and cranked the air-conditioning. Kelsey had made her feelings and her plans as clear as the Colorado sky overhead. She seemed so strong. So confident and self-assured. He’d felt like that once. Invincible. The king of the world. Oh, how he’d crashed and burned. Evidently, she had her future all planned out, and it didn’t include leaving their daughter in Merritt’s Crossing.

  “Spoiler alert, beautiful girl.” His words echoed through the truck’s cab as he drove away. “You can’t control everything.”

  While he respected Kelsey’s choice to serve their country and the terms of her military commitment were nonnegotiable, they shared a child. Nothing could sever that bond. And no matter what Kelsey believed, he’d prove he could take care of Adeline.

  Doubt nagged him as he drove toward town. An eight-second ride on a ferocious beast seemed easier than convincing Kelsey that Adeline should stay with him.