by Zoey Gong
I scoff a laugh. “I suppose so.” Honghui laughs with me.
“I’m not sure I could handle two of you,” he says, and his eyes go to the other girl, one who is more in line with the other girls he has chosen today. Girls who look nothing like me. Thinner, smaller, meeker, prettier.
Lihua shoots a look at me, commanding me to intervene. I wave to Fiyanggu. “Which of these girls has birth charts more in line with his majesty’s?” I ask.
Fiyanggu quickly checks the two girls’ information. “The girl Liling, your majesty.”
“Girl?” Fenfeng asks, speaking up for the first time today. “Not lady?”
“No, your highness,” Fiyanggu says. “Her father, Huizhong, is of no importance.”
I see Lihua blush at this. She has impersonated a poor man’s daughter just to be here. She must want to be chosen very badly indeed.
“Still,” I say, “she would be an auspicious match.”
I notice Fenfeng watching me from the corner of her eye. She looks from me, to Lihua, and back to me. Surely, she cannot suspect the truth, but she must sense that something is going on. I have said little all morning other than to say which girls I don’t want him to pick. I have not encouraged him toward any particular girls until now. But I’m running out of things to say. It is clear that he prefers the other girl. If I push any more, he is bound to grow suspicious.
“Auspicious, but ugly,” Fenfeng mutters loudly for all to hear.
I see Honghui’s nostrils flare. “I will take Liling,” he says, but from the tone in his voice, I can tell he has done it more to irritate Fenfeng than please himself. I see the other girl’s shoulders slump in disappointment.
I place my hand on Honghui’s arm. “Take them both, dear.”
“Are you sure?” he asks me hopefully.
“Yes,” I say even though in the pit of my stomach I know that this is a disaster.
Honghui cheerily motions to Fiyanggu to tell him the good news, and the other girl begins to cry joyfully.
“Thank you, Majesties!” she says as she is led away.
Lihua, though, stays and watches us, a self-satisfied grin on her face, until the curtains are drawn and Honghui, Fenfeng, and I are alone again.
“Eleven new consorts, Yanmei, and my darling empress,” Honghui says thoughtfully. “Truly, I am a blessed man.” He kisses me on my cheek before leaving with Fiyanggu to work out some details of the girls’ appointments.
I turn to go back to the inner court where the new girls are supposed to be waiting for me to pay me respect as their empress and head of the harem, but Fenfeng’s voice stops me.
“Who is that girl to you?” Fenfeng asks me.
“Who?” I ask.
She shakes her head. “Don’t play stupid with me. You know her, that much is clear. But why you would pretend not to… Well, that is a puzzle, isn’t it?”
“Stop trying to catch me out,” I tell her. “Honghui will never listen to a word you say.”
“Oh, but he does, doesn’t he?” she says. “He was about to send Liling away until I spoke up.”
I feel sick as I realize that she is right. Even now, when she should not have an ounce of power, her influence over the court is strong.
“Keep lying to me, dear,” Fenfeng says. “It will only make the truth more sweet when I discover it.” She laughs as she leaves the room and me alone with my very dark thoughts.
13
I had intended to do things differently as a new empress. Instead of sending the girls to their new homes, alone and confused and afraid, I wanted to make them feel welcome. Make them feel that this was their new home and their new family. But the plan has backfired, and as I am carried to my palace in a sedan chair, it is I who feel alone and confused and afraid of what will await me when I get there.
Why is Lihua here? What is her plan? What will she say to me now that she is a consort and I am the empress? Will my secret have already been exposed by the time I step out of my chair?
When I arrive, nothing seems out of sorts at first. Yanmei, Lihua, and the ten new consorts all await me in the courtyard, and they curtsey at my approach.
“Sister!” Yanmei says, trotting to me and taking my hands in hers. “Jinhai told me the news, that I am to be a consort again! Thank you! Thank you so much!”
We hug and I kiss her on both cheeks. “There is no need to thank me,” I tell her. “You are my dearest friend, and it is my greatest wish that you should have a child as soon as possible.”
Her eyes water as she steps back and curtseys again. “My lady is most kind and generous.”
I look around at the other girls and all of them, even Lihua, are still bowing respectfully. It would appear that Lihua does not intend to draw attention to herself for the moment, which helps me breathe a little easier.
“Ladies,” I say, addressing them all, “welcome home and into our family. I know that tradition would have you view me as a mother, but it is my desire that you see me more as a sister and friend. I appreciate your respect, of course, but I will not rule over you, but with you. All of us have the same goal—to keep his majesty happy and to give him as many children as possible. To that end, I hope to have no fighting or jealousy, but love and cooperation.”
“Thank you, your majesty,” all the ladies say in unison.
“In celebration of your arrival,” I go on, “I would like all of you to join me for supper. Until then, please, go to your new homes, unpack, and relax. Your worries are at an end.”
“May her majesty live ten thousand years!” the ladies all say. One by one, they file out of the courtyard, escorted by their new maids and eunuchs. All…but one. Lihua stays behind and we stare at each other for a moment as I wait for her to speak.
“Daiyu!” Lihua finally exclaims as she steps forward and takes me into her arms in a generous hug. I stand stone still, waiting for her to stab me in the back. She then looks at me with a pained expression. “What is wrong? Don’t you remember me?”
I see Nuwa’s eyes grow big at this. “Leave us,” I say to all the servants. I can’t have them overhearing anything that Lihua and I might have to say to each other. I then lead Lihua to a table in the middle of the courtyard so that I can see all around us to make sure no one is eavesdropping. Even if we went into a room with closed doors, people could listen at keyholes. It is safer out in the open.
“Of course I remember you,” I tell her once we are seated. “I am only confused that you are here at all. I took your place. You were free. Why would you come here? And who is Liling?”
“So many questions!” she whines. “And it has been such a long day. I’m so tired. Can we at least have some tea?”
I exhale in frustration and then wave a maid over, asking her to bring us tea and sweets. “Now,” I say as soon as the treats have been delivered and I have made sure that the maid is again well away, “tell me what is going on. Why are you here? I thought you didn’t want to be selected as a consort.”
Lihua scoffs. “That was all the work of my mother, surely even you could figure out that much.”
“I had my suspicions,” I say. “But still, why would she allow you to be here now?”
“She’s dead,” Lihua says without any feeling.
“What?”
“The old bat gave away my life and then had the audacity to up and die. Can you believe it?”
I have to shake my head, both at the news that Mingxia is dead and at Lihua’s attitude about it. She doesn’t seem sad, or even very angry. More, inconvenienced.
“I’m sorry for your loss,” I say politely, though I hardly feel sorry. It seems she manipulated both of us into getting what she wanted without a care for anyone else. “Why didn’t you marry someone else in all this time? You could have married for love.”
“Love?” she asks in almost a sneer. “You really are a foolish peasant, aren’t you? The whole point of marriage is to elevate yourself and your family. To make the best match possible. But how could I
make a good match when my mother had given my identity away to someone else? I was forced to pretend to be my mother’s maid, a companion. Can you believe it? It was so demeaning!”
I nod along even though I doubt Lihua ever had to do anything demeaning. She might have been called a maid, but surely she was never treated like one. She never had to cook or clean or bow and scrape.
“When Mother died, I was completely alone,” she goes on more seriously, setting her teacup aside and wiping the crumbs from the side of her mouth. “I had no family and no marriage prospects. But then I heard that Emperor Honghui, may he live ten thousand years, had already selected his empress. Empress Lihua, the same woman who had been empress to Guozhi, and her new regnal name was Empress Daiyu. Well, I knew it had to be you. I don’t know how you did it. When Emperor Guozhi died, I thought you would be consigned to the Temple of Grief for the rest of your life. But when I hear that you were back, that you’d been given a second chance, well, I wondered if this was my second chance as well. It has to be fate, don’t you think?”
“Things certainly have worked out differently than I expected,” I say cautiously. Lihua appears to be speaking honestly, respectfully, but I still have my guard up. I feel like a mouse being circled by a clever snake. If I do not keep my wits about me, she will strike. “So, you used your new identity as a maid to stand in during the new selection process.”
“I followed my mother’s example and used my inheritance to pay a maid to let me take her place,” Lihua explains. “Then I paid a scribe to…make my birth chart more in line with that of his majesty.”
“I see. Well, now that you are here, what happens next?” “What do you mean?” she asks innocently.
“You aren’t going to…tell anyone what we’ve done, are you?” I ask. “Who we really are?”
Lihua laughs, hiding her open mouth behind her hand. “Why would I ever do that? Why, if I told everyone who you were, then I could get in trouble too, right?”
I shrug. “Things never seem to work out the way I think they will.”
Lihua reaches over and places a hand on my arm. “You have nothing to fear from me, Daiyu,” she says with a sweet smile. I nod and smile back, but the fact that she called me Daiyu and not your majesty tells me the truth. She might not intend on exposing me for the moment, but she could. I do not hesitate to think that she would reveal the truth about me if she thought it would be advantageous to her on some way.
“Well, I’m glad we had this talk,” I say, standing up, indicating that it is time for her to leave. “You should visit your palace and have a rest. I’m sure it will be to your liking, must more beautiful than you are used to.”
She lets out a little snort. “How can it be when I’m only a rank four concubine?” she asks me, pouting her lower lip. “Me? Such an old and dear friend. Surely you can elevate me to a higher rank. There are no rank two consorts.”
She certainly wasted no time in making demands of me. What else can I do but try to keep her happy?
“Rank two is reserved for concubines and consorts who give the emperor a son,” I say. “Even rank three is supposed to only be for women who have given the emperor at least a daughter.”
“But Yanmei is rank three,” Lihua protests.
“She has been here a long time,” I say. “As long as I have. And she is my chief lady-in-waiting. Her position was a special circumstance.”
“Then make me a lady-in-waiting,” Lihua says, growing irritated. Her kind demeanor is nearly gone and she looks at me with hard eyes. I don’t want to give in. I don’t trust her. If I give her what she wants now, the demands will continue. It won’t take long for people to grow suspicious about why I have shown this girl, this man of no consequence’s daughter. But what else can I do?
I smile and nod, pretending that I think her request is a splendid idea. “Of course. I will let Fiyanggu know of the change immediately.”
“Oh, Daiyu!” Lihua says, hugging me and kissing me on each cheek. “Everything is going to work out beautifully, you’ll see!”
I raise a hand and summon Jinhai to me. “Please inform Fiyanggu that Lady Li…umm Lady Liling—” For a moment I had forgotten what her new name was. “—has been promoted to rank-three consort and is now one of my ladies-in-waiting. Be sure that she is housed accordingly.”
“Yes, of course,” Jinhai says, but I see him eye me wearily, as if he suspects something is wrong. I do my best to keep my bearing, to appear confident in my decision, and Jinhai soon rushes off to find Fiyanggu. Nuwa then approaches me, and Lihua’s new servants inch their way to her side.
“I’m sure it will take some time to prepare a new palace for you,” I tell Lihua, trying to steer us into our proper roles as empress and concubine. “You will have to rest in your current palace until it is ready. I’m sorry for the inconvenience.”
“I thank you for your kindness, my lady,” Lihua says with a deep bend of her knees and neck. “I will see you at supper.”
I nod and she takes her maid’s hand as she walks away, swaying perfectly on her pot-bottom shoes. She has a gracefulness that even now I do not possess.
“Are you in trouble, my lady?” Nuwa asks me, keeping her voice low.
“What?” I ask. “What do you mean?”
“I know I’m not Suyin, your majesty,” she says. “But you can still trust me. I promise.”
I laugh and slap playfully at Nuwa’s arm. “Honestly, I don’t know what you mean. Today is a great day for all of us. Our family has grown by leaps and bounds.”
Nuwa watches me for a moment, and it is clear she is not fooled. Still, she cannot argue with me. So, she bows her head. “Yes, my lady. Of course.”
I tell Nuwa that I am tired from the day’s activities and wish to lie down. As soon as she is gone, I curl up on my bed and cry for the fleeting moment of peace I enjoyed as empress. How will I ever find peace now?
14
“The emperor is the kindest husband a woman could wish for!” one of the new concubines, a girl named Xiuying, says. Xiuying, Yanmei, Lihua, another concubine named Chanhui, and I are all sitting in my courtyard, embroidering warm insoles for shoes that will be distributed to the poor of Peking once winter comes. The new girls have been settled in the Forbidden City for a few weeks, and I have asked them how they are feeling about their new lives here.
“I heard you were summoned to his bed last night,” Lihua says, her face looking a little sour, “for the second time.”
Xiuying blushes a little. “Yes. He gifted me with this jewel.” She reaches up and touches a butterfly pin in her hair. “Isn’t it beautiful?”
“That is a meaningful gift,” I tell her, trying to suppress a tinge of jealousy in my stomach. “His mother’s name was Hudie, butterfly.”
“He must really enjoy your company,” Yanmei says.
Lihua snorts. “That’s a kind way of putting it.”
“Stop—” I try to say, but Xiuying doesn’t hear me.
“Of putting what?” Xiuying asks.
“Of saying that the emperor enjoys whatever it is you do to him in bed,” Lihua snaps. The maids gasp and Xiuying’s face turns red as a plum.
“Enough,” I say. “There is no reason to be vulgar. All of us are here for his majesty’s pleasure. I am glad to see that Xiuying is performing her duties admirably.”
“Thank you, your majesty,” Xiuying says even though she is near to tears.
It is a strange situation that many concubines seem to find themselves in. Growing up, most young women, especially women from good families, are taught nothing of what happens between a man and wife in bed. They are only taught that they must obey their husband and give him sons. But most of them are completely ignorant about how babies are made. It is never spoken of between mother and daughter, must less in polite company. Even after a woman lays with her husband, it is still treated as a sort of secret. It is something everyone does, yet no one speaks about except in the strictest of whispers, and only in ref
erence to making babies. I had a vague idea of what men and women did in bed because I grew up so poor that I shared a room with my parents.
“Disorder is produced by women,” Yanmei says, looking at Lihua as she stabs at her embroidery. “Stop this,” I say to Yanmei.
“You would let her sow jealousy among us?” Yanmei asks me plainly.
“You would let her speak to me that way?” Lihua says to me.
“Who are you?” Yanmei asks. “A fisherman’s daughter? No, not even that. A fisherman has an honorable and useful trade. How was it your father was described? As a man of no consequence?”
Lihua jumps to her feet and lunges toward Yanmei. Thankfully, I was closer to Yanmei, so I am able to stand between them and hold Lihua back. The maids rush forward and hurry their ladies apart.
“Everyone leave except Lihua,” I say.
“How dare you let Yanmei speak to me like that!” Lihua yells at me when everyone is gone. Though, I am never truly alone. I glance around and see Nuwa not far away. I hold my hand up to tell her to stay back.
“Lower your voice,” I say to Lihua with more authority than I feel. I wonder if she knows just how afraid of her I am. Lihua scoffs and returns to her seat with her arms crossed in a huff.
“Now, what is wrong?” I ask, taking my own seat. “Why are you so hateful today?” In truth, she’s been hateful nearly every day. Nothing is ever fully to her liking. Her food isn’t good enough. Her silk robes are scratchy. Her eunuchs are too ugly. She complains incessantly, and the other girls have taken notice. I am afraid that it is becoming clear that I am showing Lihua favor, but no one can understand why. When I give gifts to Yanmei, everyone knows that it is because we are friends and I enjoy her company. But Lihua… Sadly, I cannot even pretend to like her, and she makes no efforts to be likable.
“How can you not know?” she asks. “The emperor has yet to summon me to his bed!”
“I’m sorry,” I say. “But he has thirteen women to choose from. You are lucky that there are only thirteen. When I was a concubine for Guozhi, there were hundreds of women. When he died, most of his concubines were sent to the Temple of Grief as virgins.”
