Not Yet

by Alexa Riley

  Her eyebrows rise high on her forehead.

  “What? Why does it matter if Drake’s seen me?”

  “Nothing.” She grabs my arms. “I wanna watch this.” She tugs me from the room and I almost trip over my heels. She’s way too excited about this. “And fuck the Blonde Brigade. They need to mind their own fucking business,” Lindsey adds. I have no clue what she’s talking about.

  I see Dad first when we reach the top of the stairs and I give him a big smile because he’s already got his camera out. He records everything, which is kind of adorable. I’ve even caught him recording me while I was studying. He thinks everything is a moment to be captured, which is really sweet. I wonder if Drake will be a dad like that. The random thought almost has me falling in my heels, but Lindsey has a tight hold on my arm and saves me.

  Drake steps out of the living room and into the main entryway at the bottom of the stairs. Our eyes meet, and for a moment as I descend the stairs, I forget about him leaving last night. I get lost in him and he gives me a warm smile. But it doesn't touch his eyes and I know something is wrong. I can feel it because I can read his moods.

  Mom and Dad make us pose for a million pictures before we finally leave and drive to dinner. The ride is eerily quiet and Lindsay does her best to make small talk that doesn’t get far.

  “Are you not answering your phone anymore?” Drake asks when we finally pull into the parking lot of the restaurant.

  “She was busy getting ready. Look at her.” Lindsey shocks the hell out of me when she smacks Drake right in the back of the head from the backseat. “You didn't even tell her she looked pretty.”

  Drake’s face turns to shock to match my own. I’m not sure if it’s because Lindsey smacked him in the back of the head or because it dawns on him that he hasn't said it. He hasn’t really said anything, though, to be fair.

  “Let’s eat,” I say to change the subject as Drake pulls up to the valet.

  He walks around to my side and opens the door. He leans in close. “I always think you look beautiful, Ali.”

  I can hear the regret in his voice and I don’t know if it’s for not saying something about how I look tonight or for agreeing to this dance. I nod. What do I say to that?

  When we sit down at our table, silence falls over the four of us. I feel like everyone else knows something I don’t and it’s bothering me.

  We order our food and Lindsey tries her best to get the conversation going again. I notice that Liam can’t stop touching her now. My, how the tables have turned. I also notice Drake keeps openly staring at me but not saying anything.

  “What?” I snap when I’ve finally had enough.

  It’s not like I can ask anything else with other people here. What Drake and I did was wrong, but I wanted it so badly too. More than anything I want him to want it and to fight for it. He woke something inside of me that I don’t think I can get back under control. On some basic level I know he can handle my body and give it and me what I need.

  His hand reaches for the back of his neck and he squeezes. He does that when he’s thinking hard on something.

  “We should skip the dance.” He tries to play it nonchalant as he says it.

  “You can’t skip it, you’re the king,” Lindsey reminds him. I look down at my lap and play with the napkin.

  What I really want is a black hole to open up and suck me in. He’s changed his mind and doesn't want to go with me.

  “I need to use the restroom.” I go to stand up but Drake beats me to it and pulls out my chair. I give a quick thanks before grabbing my purse and heading for the ladies’ room. I’m not sure what my plan is when I get there because it’s not like I can ditch Drake. I not only live with him but he drove all of us.

  I’m going to have to suck it up. I’m not going to get something new with Drake. I don’t know what this was, but my heart aches at the loss of something I didn’t know I wanted so desperately.

  I think I’m in love with my stepbrother and he can’t seem to get far enough away from me. He isn't touching me like he was yesterday and he still hasn't told me why he left like he did. When he said we should keep it a secret for now I agreed, but now it feels shameful, like I’m being hidden away. I hate that he wants to hide me, but a small part of me prays he’s only doing it to protect me. That’s the Drake I remember and I hope it’s the Drake he still is.

  Chapter Fourteen

  Drake

  I feel like a complete piece of shit but I’m trying my best not to ruin this for Ali. She looks utterly breathtaking and all I want to do is pull her into my arms. But I can’t and it’s absolutely killing me.

  “Maybe you should go talk to her,” I say to Lindsey. She nods and goes after her.

  I want to be the one to rush into the bathroom, but all Ali needs now is me ruining things for her.

  “You have to tell her,” Liam says.

  “Fuck, this is a mess.”

  Last night I went to Kira’s house and the place was packed. Everyone from our grade and several below was there and it was out of control. It was like something out of a movie and the second I got there I knew it was a bad idea. But I had to find Court and tell her to keep her mouth shut.

  When I walked out back Court was next to the hot tub in what had to just be a couple of strings tied together, because it didn't cover enough to be called a bathing suit. I kept my eyes on hers as I grabbed a towel and shoved it at her. I told her we needed to talk and she took that as an invitation to get me alone.

  I made sure Liam was with me the whole time so she wouldn’t start shit, and when I confronted her about the picture and rumor she was spreading she didn’t deny it. She’d already showed everyone and said that our big secret was out and that’s what I got for fucking my sister.

  I went into a rage and lashed out, but luckily Liam was there to grab me and get me out of there. But it was too late and the damage was done. Everyone saw my reaction so they knew there was some truth to what Court was saying. There was no way to close Pandora’s box, and the secret I’d kept in my heart for so long was out in the open. In the blink of an eye.

  “You have nothing to be ashamed of, but she can’t go in that dance blind.” Liam’s voice is solemn as he shakes his head. “Give her a chance to stick up for herself. I think you’ll be surprised.”

  I think it over for a second and realize he’s right. If I don’t give Ali the opportunity to arm herself from the backlash, then I’m going to end up hurting her further. I push away from the table and toss my napkin down.

  Walking to the back of the restaurant, I see the sign for the women’s restroom. I push open the door to find a small, empty lounge. I walk through another door and see Ali at the sink with tears in her eyes and Lindsey beside her with her hand on her shoulder.

  “Can I have a second with my sister?” I ask, and Lindsey looks at Ali for confirmation.

  When Ali nods I wait for Lindsey to walk out before I step closer to her.

  “I fucked up,” I say, and Ali blinks at me a few times in surprise.

  “How?” Her eyes are pleading as I step closer to her then shove my hands in my pockets to keep myself from reaching for her.

  “Because I want you and I didn’t want the outside world to mess that up.” I shake my head as I try to make her understand. “Court texted me last night. That’s where I went.”

  “You went to see Court after we…” She trails off and an image of me on my knees eating her pussy pushes into my mind.

  “I went to see her because she had a picture of us kissing outside Joe’s.”

  “Oh God.” Her face pales and she brings her fingers to her mouth.

  “It’s out,” I say, but I’m surprised at how much better I feel now that I’ve told Ali.

  “Mom and Dad?” she asks simply, and I shrug.

  “I’m sure it’s only a matter of time, but for now I don’t think they’ve heard.” I take another step forward and this time I’m right in front of her. I put my finger und
er her chin and tilt it back so she can look up at me. “If we go to this dance tonight, everyone will know we’re together.”

  “And you don’t want them to know,” she says softly. I can see the hurt in her eyes.

  “No.” I shake my head. “I don’t give a fuck who knows anymore. All I’ve ever wanted was to protect you. I love you, Ali. I’ve loved you since I was a boy, and now I love you as a man. I’m tired of hiding what I feel and pushing you away to stop it from happening because I’m worried about the fallout. I’m not doing that anymore and I won’t let you do it either.”

  “Drake.” My name is a whisper on her lips before I lean down and kiss her.

  She grips my tux as my arms wrap around her waist. Her mouth opens and she tastes warm and sweet. My cock throbs between my legs. I touch her tongue with mine and it’s soft like her pussy. I don’t think I can wait until tonight to have her. Because I will have her before the night is over.

  I pull her against me and turn her so that her back is against the door. I flip the lock and get down on my knees as I start to push her dress up.

  “What are you doing? We can’t do this here,” she says but holds the beaded material up around her waist.

  “Don’t tell me when to eat this pussy,” I growl, yanking the cotton material to the side and sucking on her sweet, soft lips. “You’re mine.” I’ve waited long enough. The floodgates have opened and there is no going back. I won’t be denied my Ali girl anymore.

  “Yes,” she gasps, rolling her hips against my mouth and pushing her pussy close to me.

  “We’re going to this dance tonight hand-in-hand and I’m going to let everyone see that you belong to me.” I swipe my tongue over her clit and she hisses.

  She spreads her legs wider and grabs my hair as she takes her pleasure.

  It doesn’t take long before her breath catches and her legs tense. I feel her release, tangy and sweet on my tongue, and I lick her clean. This time when she comes, her whole body relaxes against me and I have to hold her up.

  “I’m going to have you on my cock tonight,” I say and pull her dress back down into place. I reach down and grip my cock to squeeze it. “No matter what happens, I’m ending the night inside of you.”

  Her lips part as I lean in and kiss her hard. I can still taste her pussy on me and she moans at the flavor. I think about what it would be like to come in her mouth and then kiss her after. Maybe we can sixty-nine and then I can have both. I growl against her and then force myself to break the kiss. I rest my forehead to hers to catch my breath and she wraps her hands around my wrists.

  “I love you, too, Drake,” she says, smiling at me.

  “How about we go eat dinner and then we make our entrance?”

  “No more hiding?” She bites her bottom lip and looks at me nervously.

  “No more hiding.”

  She lets out a deep breath and then steels herself. “Let’s do it.”

  Chapter Fifteen

  Ali

  Drake pulls out the chair for me and I sit down at the table. I feel lighter and I know it’s not only his words but the orgasm he rocked my body with. The edge I was riding all day is gone and for now I feel relaxed and calm. There’s still an ache that needs to be filled, but I know Drake is going to take care of that later. For now we’re going to enjoy our night together.

  “Why are you blushing?” Lindsey asks with a knowing smile on her face. I didn't know I was but my cheeks feel warm. It’s not from blushing, it’s from what Drake did to me and this time I got to enjoy it a little longer.

  “Hush,” I say under my breath, making her laugh as Drake sits next to me. Unlike last night when he sneakily pulled my chair closer to him under the table, tonight he grabs it openly and tugs it as close to him as possible.

  “Finally.” Lindsey drops her head back dramatically and lets out a long sigh of relief.

  “What do you mean ‘finally’?” She’s made plenty of comments about Drake before, but I’m surprised she thought this would actually happen.

  “I knew this was coming.” She points back and forth between Drake and me. “It took forever before you guys finally caved to this.”

  “You knew something was up?” I glance over to Liam and as always I can’t read his face.

  “Yes, I knew something was up. You two avoid each other like the plague and I know you don’t hate each other, so it had to be something else. I think we all know now.”

  Liam nods in agreement with her. “All the guys except dumb fuck Eric know not to talk about Ali or you lose your shit.”

  “You do?” I look over to Drake, who shrugs like Liam. No one asked me to the dance expect Eric and he only asked because Drake got all pissy.

  “He avoids you but doesn't want other men near you and he goes out of his way to make sure you have stuff you need to make you happy. All those little things add up.”

  “I know we avoid each other but…” I trail off, not knowing about the other stuff she’s talking about.

  “He texts me about you,” Lindsay says and I look to Drake in surprise.

  “You text her?” I didn't think they talked at all except to be nice when she was over at our house.

  “Sometimes,” Drake answers with another one of those shrugs. He and Liam really have those down.

  “He’s full of it. He’s always asking if we get to where we were going safely and if we’re out and about. He asks if you ate all your lunch or even why you look so grumpy sometimes.” She mouths “period” and my face heats again. “I didn't say anything because I thought you two should figure it out. On the small chance I was wrong, I could have made things really weird for you.”

  I’m stunned by her words.

  “I told you, Ali, I’m in love with you.” My heart skips a beat the same way it did when he told me the first time.

  “Some people can’t see what’s right in front of their faces.” Lindsey glares over to Liam. How things change. He keeps trying to touch her and she shies away. She’s really going to make him work for it now.

  “I see.” Liam’s voice is low and rumbling like a growl. “Trust me, I fucking see.” This time his expression actually changes and I see that same glint in his eyes Drake got when he put his hands on me. “Stop moving away from me.” My mouth falls open when he plucks her from her chair and puts her right into his lap. You can’t run from a guy like Liam and I think we’re all seeing that now. “I’ve been waiting for football to be over,” he tells her. “I knew once this started—”

  Lindsey cuts him off. “What about next season or the season after that?” Oh, she’s already planning years ahead. It makes me think about where I’ll be this time next year and where Drake will end up.

  He leans over and his mouth brushes my ear. “Don’t overthink, Ali. We’ll be together.”

  I let out a breath I hadn't realized I was holding. God, he really does know me. Not only that but he can handle me. I didn't know I needed handling until he did it. I think I’ve been missing that, too, but Drake’s doing it on the sly and it’s actually really adorable. If I could possibly fall more in love with him than I already am, that would have done it.

  “I was getting there,” Liam offers, but still Lindsey isn’t having it.

  “He’s a planner,” Drake says in Liam’s defense.

  “Well, I’m impatient. It’s something you’ll have to learn to deal with.” She lifts her chin defiantly but doesn't make a move to get off Liam’s lap. The waiter comes over to our table but Liam gives the man a look and he turns around and walks away.

  “I’m never getting food,” I whisper to Drake, and he chuckles as he wraps his arm around me. Lindsey can fight all day with someone when she gets mad. His fingers drift back and forth on my bare shoulder.

  “I had to talk to your dad, too,” Liam adds, taking us by surprise.

  Lindsey is super tight with her dad since it’s only the two of them. Mom even asked Lindsey if she wanted to join us for our spa day but she turned us down
because her dad made plans for them already. Lindsey may not have a mom but her dad makes sure to fill both roles.

  “You talked to my dad?” She softens in his hold as my eyes bounce between them.

  “Yeah. Why do you think he wasn't an asshole when I got there to pick you up?”

  “Because he was in a good mood?” She blinks, a little shocked herself that she hadn't thought of it.

  I thought Mr. K was cool with everything because he thought it was a group event, so no biggie. Looks like Liam is paying a lot more attention than we thought if he knew to talk to her dad first.

  “Yeah.” He smirks before he leans in and kisses her.

  I can feel my own goofy smile as I watch them until Drake clears his throat after they don’t relent.

  “Can you do that later? My girl is hungry.”

  Liam reluctantly leans back and Lindsey gets into her chair, looking smitten. I lean into Drake and let him order for me because he knows all my favorites, then we fall into easy conversation. We laugh and talk and it feels so natural.

  For a moment I think we’ve been missing out on doing this the whole time, but really it’s a part of growing up. We’ve learned who we are and found our way while swimming through a pool of emotions. I’m just happy everyone is on the same page. I let myself enjoy dinner and all of Drake’s touches before we head off for the dance.

  “Are you ready for this?” Drake asks.

  He kisses my shoulder as I step out of the car and his hand locks with mine. I can tell he’s tense, not because he cares what people might say about him, but because he’s thinking about me and how I’ll handle it.

  “I’m ready to get it over with.”

  “Fuck that,” Lindsey chimes in. “We didn't get dressed up to get this over with. We’re going to enjoy ourselves and everyone else can kiss our asses.”

  Liam pulls her closer and mumbles something about him being the only one to kiss her ass. Drake doesn’t hide that we’re together as he puts his arm around me.