Escaping Memories

by Amanda Siegrist

  "No." Logan held up a hand to let Derek and Kat know to keep quiet. "What were you thinking, Doc? We had an agreement."

  "I was thinking that I assessed a situation and decided she could handle it. She's been through an ordeal, a very traumatic one. She's scared, I know. But she's also tough. I could tell. She took it just fine."

  "I wouldn't call that fine. I would call that lucky. And it pisses me off what you did."

  "I can see that. My apologies, Sheriff. It's done, though. Does it ease your conscious I'm not the culprit? It eases mine," Dr. Matthews said.

  "I honestly never thought you hurt her. Why does she fear doctors?" Logan asked, wanting to apologize for his behavior, but couldn't find it in himself to do it.

  "I don't know. I'm sure that answer is buried with her memories. Give it time. She'll gain them back. She's repressing them for a reason. Call me next week. I want to see her again."

  Dr. Matthews stepped off the porch and made his way to his car.

  "Thanks, Doc," Logan shouted out before Dr. Matthews closed his car door. That was the closest he would get to apologizing. Or at least expressing that his anger was mellowing down.

  "You're welcome, Sheriff."

  "What the hell happened in there?" Kat demanded, her hands splayed on her hips. She chose to keep quiet around Dr. Matthews. He was her boss. She respected him. She trusted him. She also had been teetering on the edge of pulverizing him for upsetting Doni, which is what she assumed happened. She figured keeping her mouth closed would be the best option. She'd hate to lose her job over her loose tongue.

  "Nothing brutal, I suppose. Enough to piss me off." Logan turned around, running a hand down his face.

  Kat opened her mouth to demand more, then shut it. Her brother looked positively drained. He looked worried. He looked like he cared deeply for the woman inside the cabin. Not as the sheriff, but as a man.

  Chapter 6

  "Do you have to go again?" she whispered close to his lips.

  His self-control was slowly weaning down to nothingness. But the sound of his sister closing the bathroom door had him backing away just a little. "I told you we were checking out the woods again today. Taking some four-wheelers out to cover more ground. You didn't mind Kat yesterday, right? And I apologized about Dr. Matthews. I really hope you're not mad at me."

  "I'm not. I didn't like it, but I understand, I guess. I like your sister. I just...I feel better with you around. Don't leave me, Logan."

  "I know. I enjoy spending time with you as well. I shouldn't, but—"

  "Why shouldn't you?" she asked, confused.

  Logan took a deep breath as he ran a ragged hand over his face. "Honey, I'm the sheriff. I...I'll be back later this afternoon. You're in good hands with Kat."

  She studied his face, noting the tension that poured from every corner. "Be back before it's dark?"

  "I promise. And Kat brought rolls. We'll have rolls tonight," he said, curling his lip up in delight. "Hamburgers or hot dogs?"

  "Hamburgers."

  "Ketchup or mustard?"

  "Mustard."

  "Hot or cold?"

  "Hot."

  "I think you're pretty hot, too," Logan said with a wink. He stood up before he gave in to the urge to kiss her.

  She started giggling at that. "Is that what you meant?"

  "No. But I like hearing you laugh."

  "Whatchya laughing about?" Kat asked, walking back from the bathroom.

  "Rolls," Logan said as he winked again at Doni and made his way to the door.

  "Promise you'll be back before dark?" she asked again, the fear touching her voice.

  He glanced back at her, his hand tightening on the handle. "I promise. Now give me a sweet smile to get me through the day."

  She slowly raised her lips in a delightful smile. Logan opened his mouth as if he wanted to say something, but turned his mouth into a smile instead. Before he could change his mind about staying with her, he stepped outside, and closed the door with a quiet thud. Doni glanced over at Kat, who had taken a seat on the lounge, and gave her a shy expression.

  "If I'm not mistaken, I'd say you guys weren't laughing about rolls," Kat said with a mischievous gleam in her eyes.

  "Why do you say that?" Doni asked, suddenly fiddling with the blanket.

  "Just a hunch," Kat replied, with a sly smile.

  "Everything okay? I hope you were okay in here with Dr. Matthews. He's a great boss, a very kind man. He can be point blank in his words, but he means the best."

  "I'm fine. I survived. He didn't scare me. I don't know why the thought of one does. He was very nice. I wish I could remember. I hate not remembering."

  "Don't push it. It'll come back to you. Just let it come naturally." Kat smiled, hoping to give her some reassurance as Doni didn't look very convinced that her memories would resurface. "Well, not much to do but let you rest. Wanna play a game?"

  "Can we forgo the memory game awhile? Logan and I did a bit of that this morning over breakfast. I sort of want to rest my brain right now."

  "Sure. How about a card game? Have you ever played the game War?"

  "I don't know."

  Kat stood up, a wry smirk on her face. "Girl, come up with a new way to say that."

  "Why? I enjoy the smiles I get when I say that."

  "Oh, so it's not just Logan's smile you enjoy. Good to know," Kat said, walking by her as she ventured into the kitchen.

  Doni blushed, but feigned innocence. "I have no idea what you're talking about."

  "Hmm, mmm, sure you don't," Kat said, cocking her head to the side with a hand on her hip. "Coffee?"

  "Sounds good. I do find I enjoy that much better than tea. And then I would like to try this game out," Doni said, the redness still smothering her neck to her cheeks.

  "Alright. Let me brew a pot, and then I'll grab a deck of cards. Do you like the clothes I brought? Do they fit okay?"

  Doni fixed an appreciative smile at Kat. "They're wonderful. Thank you for lending them to me. You shouldn't have brought so many. A whole suitcase, Kat?"

  Kat shrugged her shoulders. "I have a lot of clothes. I won't miss them. The underwear I bought, though. Not sure even I would wanna wear someone else's undies."

  Doni laughed as Kat gave her a mock grimace. "I think I agree."

  Kat went to work getting the coffee ready. As the coffeepot filled up, she dragged a small corner table that was near the wall until she had it positioned directly in front of Doni. Next, she grabbed the lounge, giving a few heavy tugs until she had that set up on the other side of the table. She went to the left side of the bookshelf, pulling open the cupboard on the bottom and grabbed a deck of cards, setting it onto the table. Once finished with that task, she checked on the coffee. She poured two cups and took a comfortable seat across from Doni.

  "Okay, the name of the game, win all the cards and try not to lose. I'm a shark and I hate losing. That's the only warning you'll get," Kat said, raising a brow at her.

  "Well, I have this strong feeling that I hate losing as well," Doni said, raising a brow right back. "How exactly do I win all the cards?"

  "Easy. I'll deal the entire deck out between us. We'll each lay a card face up. The person with the highest card wins. Now if we both lay the same card, war is declared," Kat said with flair, fanning her hands in the air. "If that happens, we both lay three cards face down and then we flip another card face up. The highest card laid wins the entire stack. We play until someone wins every single card. Everything make sense?"

  "I think so. Sounds easy enough."

  "Great! Nobody else will ever play this with me. You're in for it."

  "I can't wait. Bring your game, Kat."

  Kat's smile widened as she started to shuffle the cards. Five hours later, when Logan and Derek walked into the cabin, they were still playing.

  "Ha! That's what I'm talking about. I win this battle. And I'm getting close to winning the entire war," Doni said as she scooped up the pile of cards from the r
ecent battle where they both flipped over five's.

  Kat moaned in defeat as she watched Doni organize her cards. She saw Logan walk over to them out of the corner of her eye.

  "Logan! You're back," Doni said with a bright smile as she finally noticed him.

  "I should've warned you about this, honey. Kat's very ruthless when it comes to playing cards," Logan said, sitting down on the couch near her legs.

  "Ha! She's just as ruthless. She's been beating me a lot," Kat said with irritation.

  "Oh, yes. I enjoy this game a lot. We're having so much fun. You weren't gone very long. I'm glad your back," Doni said, adjusting her cards in her hands, then glanced back at Logan.

  Logan tipped the corner of his mouth up glimpsing at Kat, then bringing his eyes back to Doni. "Honey, we've been gone for five hours. Are you telling me you ladies have been playing this game since we left?"

  Doni's eyes bulged a bit, glancing at the window, noticing that it still held daylight.

  "I promised I'd be back before dark. It's not dark yet, but it's nearing supper time," Logan said, itching to grab her hand to prevent the panic to spread any further.

  "I hadn't realized the day went so fast. I feel like we just started playing," Doni said, calming down a bit, his mere presence by her legs enough.

  "And we aren't done. Go make supper. We have gaming to do here. And just so you know, we played other card games besides War, but this seems to be our favorite. Now go," Kat said, shooing Logan away with her hands.

  "She's right. I'm getting there. I almost have the entire deck in my hands," Doni said with a triumphant smile.

  "I never lose this much. I'm not starting today," Kat said, laying down a card face up.

  "Oh, boy, I think this is bad. You're both crazy when it comes to playing cards," Logan said with a chuckle.

  "Crazy can be good. Right?" Doni asked, a smile piercing in her eyes.

  Logan's face softened, his eyes crinkling into thought as he held her gaze. "I guess I can handle a little crazy."

  "Go away. You have supper to make," Kat said.

  Logan looked over at Kat, changing his look to feigned annoyance. "And this is why I won't play cards with you. I'll go and make supper."

  "Will you play with me? I like this game," Doni said with a gentleness that would've brought him to his knees if he had been standing.

  He placed a soft hand on her leg. "I would love to play with you. Like I said, I can handle a little crazy."

  "You're in for it. She's more than a little crazy. Trust me," Kat said with a laugh as she held her hand out to Doni. "It's your turn. Lay a card down and quit making eyes with my brother. He has supper to make...and I have a game to win."

  If Doni hadn't been so engrossed in the game, she might've blushed at that statement. Instead, she placed a card face up, smiling triumphantly at Kat when she won the round. "Don't forget the rolls, Logan. I have to beat your sister now in this game. Is that okay?"

  "Honey, you can beat her in the game anytime you please. She needs to lose for once," Logan said, lightly squeezing her leg before standing up from the couch. "Don't mind me, ladies. I'll holler when I'm done. You staying for supper, Derek?"

  "Uh, yeah. I ain't missing this for the world. I swear the last time I played with Kat, she was gonna slit my throat," Derek said with a mangled laugh.

  "Playing cards is serious business, Grahamikins. Don't mess with me," Kat said, as she kept her eye on the cards and scooped up the cards this time as she beat Doni's three with an eight.

  "I'd never mess with you, Kitty Kat," Derek said, heading further into the kitchen to help Logan.

  Logan was by the fridge, pulling out ingredients for hamburgers when Derek whispered, "Well, good thing they were occupied. I guess she didn't worry as much as you thought she would. Kat does a good job of distracting her."

  "I'm glad. I was really worried leaving her again. You should see the fear every time I step out of her view. She kept asking if I'd be back before dark. She really hated the thought I'd be out in the dark."

  "I don't think it's so much you being out in the dark. I think it's her fearing the dark without you around. You were sorta flirting, sorta a bit. You sorta, kinda like her, Sheriff?"

  "You sorta, kinda have a way of asking that, Derek," Logan snapped quietly. "You sorta, kinda have a thing for my sister?"

  Derek's smiled dipped. "No! Just making sure you know what you're doing. Another day with no answers, no clue where she popped out of the woods from. What happens if we never find the answers?"

  "I will find the answers, Derek. And I know what I'm doing. Don't worry about it. And keep your opinions to yourself. I don't want rumors running around town."

  "I'd never do that."

  "Good. I'd hate for everyone to know you're soft on Kat," Logan said, as he went back to preparing supper.

  "Low blow, Sheriff, low blow. But well played," Derek said with a laugh. "Need help?"

  "No. Go monitor the game. I have this strong feeling Doni's gonna be just as ruthless as Kat," Logan said just as Doni whooped with laughter. "Yeah, definitely gonna be just as ruthless. Admit it, you like that about Kat."

  Derek gave him a wary eye, weighing his words. "I suppose I like it just as much as you like it about Doni."

  "Fair enough, Derek," Logan said with a smirk. There were suddenly so many things he liked about her. He was glad to be back; just as happy as the smile on her face indicated she was glad he came back. He was sinking fast into her clutches.

  The night went fast. Doni beamed with happiness that she won the game. Kat tried not to grumble too much because it was nice to see Doni so happy. And Kat did win a few of the games earlier in the day.

  Logan had already brought Doni to the bathroom for the last time, where she managed a bath on her own, and applying the salve as well. He did help with her feet, applying the soothing salve, and wrapping her up with gauze.

  He had just deposited her on the couch, flipped the light out, the fireplace providing a nice glow around them, and plopped down onto his bed on the floor.

  "Logan?"

  He looked up at Doni, her face illuminated softly by the firelit glow. "Yeah, honey."

  "Um...you know...I would..." She took a deep breath and closed her eyes.

  He scooted closer to the couch and grabbed her hand that hung loosely over the side. "Don't ever be afraid to tell me something. I'll always understand."

  "Thank you for sleeping out here with me," she finally said, opening her eyes as the last word left her soft mouth that always invited him in.

  "Of course. I understand why. I don't ever want you to worry or be scared about anything. I'm sorry we didn't find anything today…and that your prints weren't in the system. You could've had answers by now."

  "I'm not that sorry."

  His face contorted into confusion. "Why? Don't you want to know who you are?"

  "Yes. But not if I'm a criminal," she whispered with a strained breath. "You wouldn't like me if I was a criminal."

  Logan sat up, scooting even closer to the couch until he was mere inches from her face, his hand still holding hers near the floor. "It wouldn't matter. I'd like you no matter what. And your prints could be in the system for a multitude of reasons. Sure, being a criminal is one of them. Applying for a job is another. It doesn't mean you did something bad if your prints are in the system. But like I said, it wouldn't have mattered."

  "Are you sure?"

  "I'm positive. I'll figure this all out. It's not going as fast as I would like it. I sent your dress down to the lab in the Cities for analysis. My department is too small. We don't have the capabilities to process the evidence ourselves. I wish we did. They told me it could take a couple of weeks to hear anything back. I don't seem to be helping as much as I want to."

  Her eyes shined with amazement. "You've helped, trust me. I don't think I would be sitting calmly on this couch if you hadn't."

  He brushed a lock of hair away from her cheek as he kept his ga
ze with hers. "There's something about you, honey, that tears me up inside. I don't just mean in the sense of helping."

  "What do you mean?" she asked, trying to keep her head planted on the pillow and not reaching for his lips that stood a breath away.

  "I mean, when you look at me like that. I have a hard time looking away," Logan said, brushing another tender caress across her cheek. "I shouldn't do anything about it because I'm the sheriff."

  "Do what? What shouldn't you do?"

  "Are you trying to drive me insane with your sweet innocent questions?" Logan asked, running a hand over his face.

  "You do that a lot. It's quite adorable," she said with a tender smile.

  "Do what?"

  "Run your hand over your face when you're frustrated, nervous, agitated. Am I making you feel that way? I didn't mean to."

  "I never noticed. Maybe I am a bit. When you have a beautiful, sweet woman on your couch in your cabin, it's difficult not to be a little frustrated, nervous, and slightly agitated. Nothing you did, sweetheart. I promise."

  "Do you really think I'm beautiful?" she asked shyly, glancing away from his look.

  Logan gently touched her face, tipping her chin back to his eyes. "Yes. I told you before. Beauty isn't just the outside of a person, even though you are. You're so beautiful inside. Sometimes it hurts just thinking about it. You are lost in this world, no idea who you are, and yet, so brave. That is beautiful as hell."

  "I freak out anytime you want to leave. How is that brave? I'm pathetic, if anything," she said in a tiny voice, wanting to lower her eyes. But he refused to let her as his hand cupped her chin firmly, yet gently.

  "Brave. Trust me, darling. Nothing but brave. Maybe you freak out verbally, I just freak out internally when I leave you. Same thing. Guess that makes me pathetic, too," he replied, the truth of those words pouring out in waves from the tender look in his eyes.

  "Really?"

  "Really. Even when I find the answers about you, and I will, I'd like to stay as a friend in your life," he said, tentatively.

  "Just a friend?"

  "Yep, you're driving me insane with your sweet innocent questions," Logan said as he gave a small laugh. "Do you want more than friends? I'm the sheriff."