Escaping Memories

by Amanda Siegrist

  "I was nervous. You always know how I feel, very attuned, very considerate. I'm not nervous anymore. I was thinking of how I'm going to seduce you tonight." She never wavered her eyes as she said it, looking directly into his shocked expression.

  His hands slightly jerked on the wheel, straightening the truck before he veered off the road. "Are you trying to make me run the vehicle off the road, honey? You can't just say things like that to a man."

  "Why not? You asked what I was thinking and I was just being honest. Honesty is important." She smiled as she watched him twitch in his seat and grip the wheel tighter.

  "Honesty is important, you're right. But still. Just throwing things out there like that…I…give me a little warning next time." He ran a flustered hand over his face.

  "Are you nervous for some reason, Logan?"

  He glanced at her, his expression a strangled one. "You're trying to drive me insane. I just know it. You need to stop smiling at me like that. We talked about this, honey, and I...you're still healing."

  "I'm healed up just fine. I won't pressure you if you're really uncomfortable. But I want you, Logan. And when you kiss me like you do, it just makes me want you more."

  He wiggled in his seat a bit more, adjusting himself as best as he could. He was hard as a rock from her admission. Trying to seduce him. He was such a goner tonight. He would resist her as much as he possibly could. But now, he was dying to know how she planned to seduce him.

  "Uncomfortable?" she asked with a sly tone.

  "You damn well know I am. Saying things like that." He flickered another glance at her. "You know this is a small town, honey."

  "You're changing the subject." The surprise was evident on her face, her brow lifted in amusement as well.

  "No. I'm going to point something out to you. This is a small town. Tongues flap quite easily and quite frequently. I haven't said anything, but you know they're already flapping a bit about a mysterious woman being found and staying at the sheriff's cabin. They're gonna flap even more when you stay at my house. Are you sure you don't wanna stay at Kat's?"

  "Does it bother you people saying things about us like that? Do you want me to stay at Kat's?" Her voice suddenly held a hint of doubt.

  He instantly reached over and grabbed her hand, bringing it closer to his lap. "I don't give a shit what people say about me. Never have and never will. Although, I am the sheriff. And I should. Being the sheriff also makes it easier to tell them nicely to shut their flaps. But I worry about what that'll do to you. I want you with me, nowhere else."

  "Still worrying about my feelings. And that's why you make it so easy to like you, Logan. How can I resist that?"

  "I never said you should. Just that we should take it slow." He squeezed her hand lightly. "Don't let anyone make you feel uncomfortable. And if they do, you tell me who it is right away."

  "Logan—"

  "No, honey, let me finish. If we're being honest, then I should say something. I just don't want to scare you." He suddenly wanted to run a hand over his face. But he couldn't. One hand held the wheel and the other her soft, luscious hand. He refused to release either of them. One for safety reasons, the other, because the thought to let her go tore his heart up.

  "You escaped wherever you were held. I don't think for one minute this monster let you go. I never imagined monsters living in my town, but they do. The night I found you, I dealt with a monster that killed his own ten year old daughter that same morning. I don't want this person...this monster...to get you again. But if it's someone from town, it's a possibility. I want you to be aware of your surroundings and be with me at all times. If not me, then one of my deputies, my sister or brother, or Charlotte. No exceptions. I trust those people with my life. Anyone else in town, not so much. You mean too much to me to lose you. Do you understand what I'm saying?"

  He slowed to stop at the fork in the road. He didn't notice any traffic, and wouldn't have cared anyway. He turned towards her. "I scared you, didn't I?"

  "Maybe a little. Maybe a lot. But I needed to hear that. How long have you considered this?" she asked, trying to fight off the wave of terror running through her body.

  "From almost the beginning. At the cabin, I wasn't too worried. Now we're venturing into town and I have to go back to work. It'll get a little dicey. I want you safe. I honestly can't bear to think of anything happening to you, honey. You may think me resisting you is a sign I don't care as much, but no, that's not it. I can't lose you. To anyone."

  "You should've told me right away." She tried to hold in her smile at his sweet words about not losing her. The tremors still wanted to consume her body, but as he held her hand, his warmth and safety flowed through those tremors with ease.

  "I didn't think you could handle it before. You're brave, but I see the slight fear enter. Not so much as the days go by. Probably everything sinking in a little better, but...hell, who am I kidding? I didn't even want to tell you now. But I had to. I need you to be aware."

  He unbuckled his belt and scooted over to her side, leaning as best as he could as his foot still held the brake. He grabbed her face and kissed her hard. Brief, but hard. "I can't lose you. I will figure out what happened. I promise."

  "I know you will. I'm glad you told me. I will be cautious."

  "Good. Let's get home now." He kissed her one more time and shifted back over to his side. "I'm dying to see how you're going to seduce me. Any hints?"

  "Nope. You'll just have to wait and see," she replied, a sly smile pasted on her lips.

  He smiled back, liking that look a lot better than the grim terror that had settled when he uttered what he did.

  He turned right, heading towards home, not getting there fast enough. As soon as he pulled into his driveway, he shut off the motor, and shifted his eyes towards her.

  "You okay? Been a little quiet the last stretch there," Logan said, unbuckling his belt.

  She turned her head to him with a sweet smile. "Yep. I was just enjoying the scenery and the town. It's very small. Is it really just a few shops lining the main road we drove through?"

  "It is. Very, very small town. But a great place to live."

  "Trying to sell the town to me, Sheriff?"

  "Do you want me to?"

  "No. You already sold me," she said so tenderly.

  If he hadn't already plummeted his heart to the ground in an emotion he couldn't describe for her, he definitely had in that moment.

  "Well, then it was just a statement of the obvious. I see Kat's car. Hopefully she's started supper. You hungry, honey?"

  "Yes, Logan, I'm very hungry," she said, giving him a look that said it wasn't food she was hungry for. She opened her door and hopped out of the truck carefully.

  He ran a ragged hand over his face, groaning. You are the sheriff! He tried to repeat those words daily, hourly, hell, every minute to stop himself from taking more than what he should from her. The more he repeated that, the more it just didn't matter. He was ready for her to seduce him and take it wherever this situation would lead. How could he resist her when she spoke to him like that? Or gave him those smoldering looks? No woman had ever spoken to his heart the way she does. And so innocently, too. Even as she sounded brave and confident, he saw the hesitation, the slight uncertainty in her eyes.

  "What are you doing, Logan? You going to introduce me to the sweet looking lady walking up to the house or what?" Seth said, knocking on the window of the truck.

  Logan jumped in his seat from the sudden onslaught. So lost in his thoughts, he hadn't realized he was still sitting in the vehicle. He opened the door, jumping out with more confidence than he felt.

  "Watch it, Seth," Logan muttered as a veiled threat.

  "Watch it, as in keep my paws off because she's going through something terrible. Or watch it, as in keep my paws off because you're already staking claim," Seth said with a chuckle.

  "Does it matter which one applies? The important thing is not to go there," Logan said, pointing a finger
at him. "What happened to Stacy?"

  "Stacy who?" Seth started around the truck with an extra quickness that Logan did not let go unnoticed.

  "So you two are fighting again?"

  "I'm done with her. There is no Stacy. There is a beautiful woman waiting on the porch, though," Seth said. He grunted in pain when Logan grabbed him by the back of his shirt.

  Logan whipped him around, grabbing him tightly by the front of his shirt. "I'm only going to say this one time, Seth, so make sure your ears are listening. You will make no moves on that beautiful woman whatsoever. Have I made myself clear?"

  "Geez, Logan. I've never seen you react like this. I was just joking. I got the hint the first time. Not to mention Kat already made the comment how...how close you two seem. Lighten up, bro. Let me go," Seth said calmly, holding his hands up in an innocent gesture.

  Logan gently released his shirt, wiping the wrinkles from Seth's shirt for a moment, then stepped back. He ran another frustrated hand over his face. "Sorry, Seth. I don't know what came over me. Just...don't go there."

  "I won't. Like I said, I was kidding. Stacy and I are done, but, you know, it's hitting me harder than I expected." Seth shuffled his feet a bit, then glanced at Logan. "You like her a lot, I see. You've never reacted that way towards me. Or that way about a woman...ever. You barely know her."

  "I know plenty, Seth. She barely knows herself. But I know all I need to. Just drop it."

  "Okay."

  Before Seth could say more, he heard a soft, gentle voice speak behind him. "Is everything okay, Logan?"

  Seth turned around to see Doni wringing her hands in a nervous gesture and darting glances between the two of them.

  Logan took two long strides and stopped right in front of her, almost reaching for her hand. "Everything's fine, honey. Nothing to worry about. Just brotherly love. Nothing to it. Doni, I'd like you to meet my brother, Seth."

  Logan looked over at Seth and gestured towards Doni. "Seth, this is Doni. That's what she likes to be called. Kat almost had her going with Kit."

  "Well, thank goodness that didn't happen. The way her brain operates sometimes, I just don't know what she's thinking," Seth said with a laugh. He held is hand out towards her. "Nice to meet you, Doni."

  Doni gave him a shy smile and tentatively shook his hand back. Confusion muddled her mind when she first saw the exchange between the brothers, especially not hearing what they were saying. A deep worry had instantly entered her stomach, making her forget all talk about seducing Logan. What upset him? She had seen it in his face.

  She stood there staring at Seth, seeing the similarities to Logan. While Logan was taller with brown eyes, short brown hair, and the softest hands known on the planet, Seth's hands were much rougher. She could feel the calluses, the hard work displayed in his grip. His eyes were a pale green, his hair brown, but held a slightly lighter tone than Logan. He also wore his hair long, combed back in one long slick position. It made her wonder how he got it to stay that way. Gel? Hairspray? Did men use hairspray? She almost blurted that out when she realized she was staring and not answering him.

  "Umm...yes, Seth, nice to meet you as well," she said shyly, pulling her hand from his.

  "Seth and I will grab the bags. Why don't you go inside and see what Kat's up to. Rest your feet a bit, maybe," Logan said, shoving a hand in his pocket before he grabbed her in front of his brother. She started nervously wringing her hands together.

  "Okay. Are you sure everything's alright? Did something happen? You looked upset, Logan. You're not leaving, are you?" she asked suddenly panicked, looking up at the sun that was starting to dip down towards the horizon.

  Logan couldn't resist at her frightened expression. He pulled his hand out of his pocket, grabbing her hands to stop the nervous twisting she was doing.

  "I'm not leaving. I swear. Nothing happened...nothing. Just a word or two between brothers, honey. Nothing serious. Please, don't worry about a thing."

  "You just looked so upset. The sun's going down and..." A corner of her lip tipped up as the shaking stopped in her hands. "I'll wait for you inside."

  "Hey, Doni. I broke up with my girlfriend. I said some things that I didn't mean. I'm feeling a bit raw right now. She meant a lot to me. Logan's not going anywhere," Seth said, feeling like he had to add in something for her benefit.

  Doni glanced at him, frowning a bit. "I'm sorry to hear that, Seth. Logan's a very kind man. I can only assume you are as well. I imagine she has no idea what she lost."

  "Wow, thanks, Doni. That makes me feel a bit better," Seth said with sincerity.

  "I'll go see if Kat needs my help with anything," Doni said, glancing back at Logan.

  His eyes had been trained on Seth, an unreadable expression pouring out. As soon as he turned his eyes back to Doni, a tenderness she had come to cherish flickered at her. "Sounds good, sweetheart. We'll be right behind you with the bags."

  Doni nodded, reluctantly letting go of his hands, and headed towards the house. Logan went back to the truck as soon as she entered the house.

  "So Kat's mentioned a thing or two about her, but I hadn't realized...what was that, Logan?" Seth asked, joining him by the truck.

  "She hates the dark, Seth. Like, really hates it. Perhaps she relies on me too much, but I'm okay with that. Just the thought of me not with her when the sun goes down freaks her out." Logan grabbed a bag from the back of the truck as Seth grabbed the other one.

  "Freaking out is an understatement. She was shaking like an earthquake, Logan."

  "Just one, Seth. Just hearing one tiny nightmare of hers and you would realize why. Based on those nightmares, I know she was held in a tiny, dark room. Dark. She's entitled to freak out as bad as she wants."

  Seth, mimicking his big brother as before, ran a ragged hand over his face. "I suppose you're right. I thought she liked to be called Doni."

  Logan started heading towards the house, Seth keeping in step with him. "Yeah, she does. What's your point?"

  "You called her honey...and sweetheart. The only time you called her Doni was to introduce us."

  Logan stopped walking and glared at Seth. "I repeat, what's your point?"

  "You know, for being known as such a softie around these parts, you sure harden up real quick when it comes to talking about that woman. I have no other points to point out to you," Seth said as he continued towards the house, Logan slowly following him, having no response to that.

  ***

  "So, are you going to visit me tomorrow? Or are you staying with that hunk of junk all day? Dr. Matthews still wants to see you one more time to see how you are healing," Kat said to Doni as she stood by the front door with a hand on her hip, gesturing with her head towards Logan, who was putting dishes away in the kitchen.

  "I'm standing right here. I can hear you, you know. Why am I a hunk of junk?" Logan asked as he wiped a plate dry and put it in its place in the cupboard.

  "Because you're my big brother and I can call you whatever the hell I please." Kat glanced back over at Doni, her eyebrow raised, waiting for an answer. "Well, do you wanna see where I work or what? I'm way cooler than he is."

  "How about we meet for lunch?" Doni said with a small smile. "You are definitely cool, Kat." Doni chose to ignore the comment about Dr. Matthews. She didn't want to go into the clinic. She wasn't even sure she wanted him examining her again. He was nice, but he was still a doctor. She could feel her nerves just jumping at the prospect.

  Kat stepped closer to Doni. "Are you afraid of the clinic? You still jump a little when the word...doctor is said."

  Doni suppressed the urge to jump right in that moment when she said that dreadful word. "I...my first day in town...and..."

  Kat laid a reassuring hand on her shoulder. "I won't pressure you. But sometimes facing your fears head-on is better than taking two steps back. The more you let that fear consume you, the more your memory is going to stay buried."

  "I know, Kat. I just..."

  "I get it. D
on't worry. Lunch is cool." Kat took a step back towards the door. "Bye-bye, Logan."

  Logan turned his head as he placed another plate back in the cupboard. "Bye, Kat. Thanks for cooking."

  "Anytime lug nut." Kat looked over at the couch, piercing a hard glare at Seth. "It's getting late. Perhaps past your bedtime."

  "Considering I haven't had a bedtime in over fifteen years...I think I'm good, Kat." Seth barely glanced at her as his eyes watched the baseball game going on the TV.

  Kat cleared her throat. "Maybe you need to cry some tears over Stacy then."

  At that, Seth whipped his head towards her. "I'm not shedding one tear over her."

  Kat gave him a look that could fry an egg without heat and a subtle tilt of her head towards Doni. "You dated for over two years, on and off. Perhaps one little tear would suffice."

  Seth took a deep breath getting the drift and stood up from the couch. "Yeah, whatever. It's getting late anyway and I gotta work early tomorrow."

  "You wanna join us for supper tomorrow?" Logan asked.

  "No. I got plans with Evan. Told him I'd help put in new brakes on his car. Just...let's quit talking about Stacy already. We're like oil and water...we just don't mix."

  He had stepped within reaching distance of Doni, feeling her light feathery hand touch his shoulder. "They may not mix well, but sometimes they draw a beautiful picture within the turbulence. Two years is a long time. Something held you two together. Don't forget the good times. Memories are precious, Seth. Don't hate her." Doni dropped her hand from his shoulder.

  Her face panicked. "Unless she cheated. Then you can hate her."

  Seth pulled a grin up with a slow manner. "She didn't cheat. But thanks, Doni. You're right. We did have some good times. I don't know why we keep breaking up. But I'm done. I'm not going back to her."

  "And that's okay. I just don't like seeing you unhappy. You look so much like Logan sometimes and I hate when he looks unhappy," Doni said, blushing from that admission.

  Seth stepped closer, pulling her into a hug without asking. He wrapped her tightly, bending his head to her ear as he whispered, "My brother found a beautiful, amazing woman. He's a lucky man. You ever need me, just ask."