110-Million Bride

by Natsume Akatsuki

  Copyright

  Konosuba: God’s Blessing on This Wonderful World!, Vol. 7

  NATSUME AKATSUKI

  Translation by Kevin Steinbach

  Cover art by Kurone Mishima

  This book is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, and incidents are the product of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously. Any resemblance to actual events, locales, or persons, living or dead, is coincidental.

  KONO SUBARASHII SEKAI NI SHUKUFUKU WO!, Volume 7: OKUSENMAN NO HANAYOME

  Copyright © 2015 Natsume Akatsuki, Kurone Mishima

  First published in Japan in 2015 by KADOKAWA CORPORATION, Tokyo.

  English translation rights arranged with KADOKAWA CORPORATION, Tokyo, through TUTTLE-MORI AGENCY, INC., Tokyo.

  English translation © 2018 by Yen Press, LLC

  Yen Press, LLC supports the right to free expression and the value of copyright. The purpose of copyright is to encourage writers and artists to produce the creative works that enrich our culture.

  The scanning, uploading, and distribution of this book without permission is a theft of the author’s intellectual property. If you would like permission to use material from the book (other than for review purposes), please contact the publisher. Thank you for your support of the author’s rights.

  Yen On

  1290 Avenue of the Americas

  New York, NY 10104

  Visit us at yenpress.com

  facebook.com/yenpress

  twitter.com/yenpress

  yenpress.tumblr.com

  instagram.com/yenpress

  First Yen On Edition: December 2018

  Yen On is an imprint of Yen Press, LLC.

  The Yen On name and logo are trademarks of Yen Press, LLC.

  The publisher is not responsible for websites (or their content) that are not owned by the publisher.

  Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data

  Names: Akatsuki, Natsume, author. | Mishima, Kurone, 1991– illustrator. | Steinbach, Kevin, translator.

  Title: Konosuba, God’s blessing on this wonderful world! / Natsume Akatsuki ; illustration by Kurone Mishima ; translation by Kevin Steinbach.

  Other titles: Kono subarashi sekai ni shukufuku wo. English

  Description: First Yen On edition. | New York, NY : Yen On, 2017–

  Identifiers: LCCN 2016052009 | ISBN 9780316553377 (v. 1 : paperback) | ISBN 9780316468701 (v. 2 : paperback) | ISBN 9780316468732 (v. 3 : paperback) | ISBN 9780316468763 (v. 4 : paperback) | ISBN 9780316468787 (v. 5 : paperback) | ISBN 9780316468800 (v. 6 : paperback) | ISBN 9780316468824 (v. 7 : paperback)

  Subjects: CYAC: Fantasy. | Future life—Fiction. | Adventure and adventurers—Fiction. | BISAC: FICTION / Fantasy / General.

  Classification: LCC PZ7.1.A38 Ko 2017 | DDC [Fic]—dc23

  LC record available at https://lccn.loc.gov/2016052009

  ISBNs: 978-0-316-46882-4 (paperback)

  978-0-316-46883-1 (ebook)

  E3-20181109-JV-NF-ORI

  Prologue

  “You impossible—impossible—impossible man! Why do you always have to be like this?!”

  “Me?! Why do you always have to be like this? I’m the only one you ever get this angry with! What is it about me that ticks you off so badly? Wait—are you trying to get me to notice you? Like some kind of hot-cold type? If you’re in love with me, just say so already!”

  I fired my retort at Darkness from the sofa, where I was lounging on my stomach. Her eyebrow arched dangerously.

  “And just what makes you think I would ever fall in love with a layabout virgin shut-in like you?! That’s the dumbest, stupidest thing I’ve ever heard, and I’m not afraid to let you know it!”

  “Aww, leave me alone! This is my special ring-polishing time! I got this ring from Iris! If I lose it because we were fighting, what am I gonna do then? This thing’s irreplaceable, you know!”

  This was of particular concern to me because at that moment, Darkness had me by the collar.

  “That’s exactly why I’m so upset about this! It’s a national treasure that was with Princess Iris every waking moment until she gave it to you. You can’t polish it with a dirty handkerchief!”

  “That hurts! Even I have my pride, you know. I admit this handkerchief isn’t the fancy kind, but I am taking care of it in my own way. This ring is precious, the touchstone for all my memories of Iris!”

  “You think I’m worried about how much that rag cost?! I’ve seen you blow your nose on it! Go get a nice new polishing cloth this instant!!”

  With that last belligerent shout, she finally put me down again. A second later, she collapsed onto the couch herself, looking drained.

  “Sheesh. Being around you is the most exhausting thing,” she said. “We’re finally back home, and I can hardly even relax.”

  “You can’t relax? It’s practically your hobby to cause trouble for me, and you think you can stand there and lecture me? I know you only barely qualify as upper-crust, but you are supposed to be a blue blood, right? It wouldn’t kill you to act just a little more refined and, you know, noble.”

  “‘Only barely’?! The Dustiness family, the house people call the kingdom’s confidant, ‘only barely’ noble?! In the whole wide world, I think you’re the only man who could insult me so thoroughly!”

  “Look, if you’re trying to compliment me, you’re not doing a very good job. You need to be clear and precise when praising someone.”

  “I’m not praising you!” Darkness leaned back against the sofa and took a sip of the black tea sitting on the table. “I know, I know. You’ve always been this way. Even when I told you who I really was, you cared less about my background than my name. You’re weird that way.”

  “Whoa, what’s this, Lalatina? You of all people have no right to call me weird. A sheltered rich-girl-cum-adventurer-cum-masochist? You want all the archetypes you can get your hands on, don’t you, you greedy lady?”

  Darkness set the tea back on the table. “I can see I’ll have to settle things with you eventually.”

  “Yeah, sure. Let’s have us another duel sometime, my lady.”

  She looked regretful, but I didn’t pay much attention to her. Instead, I also picked up a cup of tea and took a sip. “Hey, this is pretty good. Despite all the things you suck at, you make a pretty mean cup of tea.”

  That seemed to placate Darkness a bit. “Heh-heh! People don’t tend to think much of my cooking, but I’m confident in my tea-making abilities. The trick to a good cup of tea is warming up the mug first, then pouring the tea out to the last drop. If you apologize for the nasty things you said to me, I might see my way to making you another cup.”

  “Okay, okay. I’m sorry for teasing you. Tell you what—to make it up to you, when your household falls into disgrace, I’ll hire you as my maid.”

  “Disgrace?! Sheesh. You really are hard to fathom. Just when I think you’re a lazy good-for-nothing, you show a bit of courage. Sometimes you help people out, and sometimes you spend all night partying with the weirdest crowd and doing all sorts of other things I can’t approve of. For goodness’ sake, which one is the real you?”

  “The real me? Whatever. Everyone does the occasional good deed when they’re in a good mood. But then they get a little upset, and suddenly they’re peeing on a wall somewhere. I’m just a normal person like that. Sorry I’m not the big-shot, serious hero you wanted.”

  “Hmm? You don’t have to be sorry. I like average guys better than princes or heroes or whatever. Guys just like you…”

  “H-hey, what’re you implying? What are you trying to say? First Megumin, now you—what is it with you girls and these ambiguous declarations? How’s a virgin supposed to understand you if you don’t
speak clearly?”

  My words only brought a thin smile to Darkness’s lips. “Hmm. Now, what do I mean…?”

  And then she sipped her tea, looking rather pleased.

  Chapter 1

  May Even These Rising-Star Adventurers Catch a Break!

  1

  The letter summoning us to the Adventurers Guild arrived a few days after we had gotten back to Axel.

  “Now then, Adventurer Kazuma Satou. Regarding the matter that led us to bring you here…”

  One of the Guild’s front-desk girls was holding a heavy bag and beaming at me.

  “…as the amount this time is so large, it’s taken us a while to get the money together. However, here is your reward for the defeat of the Demon King’s general Sylvia—three hundred million eris! This makes four generals of the Demon King you’ve vanquished, Mr. Satou! You’ve become a real veteran of our guild! Please accept this reward!”

  “““““Oooooooh!”””””

  There was a cheer from the gathered adventurers. Smiling generously, I reached out for the bulging sack, which was indeed very heavy.

  “Hey, you guys, take it easy. You act like I’ve never taken out a major bounty before. Three hundred million eris is hardly worth all this ceremony… Huh? Um, Miss, you can let go of that bag anytime now. I’ve got a good grip on it—I won’t drop it. Hey, c’mon! Leggo! G-get your hands off that!”

  The guild girl seemed loath to part with the money.

  The building echoed with the murmuring of adventurers.

  “Man, Kazuma and that party of his have taken down four generals! When they started out, I wondered how long it would be before they all got slaughtered. But look at them now!”

  “Yeah, no kidding. They couldn’t even manage a few frogs before, and now Kazuma is one of the richest men in Axel. Some things just don’t make any sense.”

  “Hey, I’ve always said Kazuma is a guy who comes through when it counts.”

  “Weren’t you the one who said we should take bets on how long it would be before his party got wiped out? Well, it doesn’t change how impressive they are. Kazuma’s an Adventurer; they’re supposed to be the weakest class. He’s got zilch in the way of equipment, and he still goes toe-to-toe with the Demon King’s generals!”

  I had finally managed to wrest the money away from the guild girl and started hugging it protectively. I looked around at the peanut gallery whispering about me.

  Keeping my face as straight as I could, I said, “Gosh. You think you’re going to get anywhere with flattery like that?”

  Then I exclaimed:

  “Well, you’re right! I’m ordering a round of the finest wine in the house for everyone here!”

  “Yeaaaaaaah! Ka-zu-ma! Ka-zu-ma! Ka-zu-ma!”

  “Yessss! You’re wonderful, Kazuma! Marry me! And then take care of me for the rest of my life!”

  “Best nouveau riche in Axel!”

  “That’s Nothing-but-Luck Kazuma for you!”

  “Ha-ha-ha! Praise me all you want, guys, but you won’t wheedle anything else out of— Hey! Who called me Nothing-but-Luck Kazuma? I have all kinds of things besides Luck!”

  It had been close to a year since I came to this place. It was a long time coming, but it was finally here:

  My moment.

  “You’re the worst! Kazuma, you are the worst! Here I am, sick with worry because you’re late getting home, and then I find out you’re secretly having a party without me? I was right to come and check on you!”

  Aqua was sitting across from me at the Guild, which was 20 percent noisier than usual.

  “Look, I’m sorry for staying out so late, but you were the one who said that when our party gets summoned to the Guild, it’s always bad news, and sent me here by myself. Oh, hey, look. Here’s a nice cold Crimson Beer. Come on, have a drink.”

  I took the Crimson Beer that I had ordered for myself and set it in front of Aqua.

  “Hey,” she said, “if you think a little alcohol is all it takes to get rid of me, you’ve got another think coming. Megumin was wandering around the house like an angry bear, muttering, ‘He still hasn’t come back…’ every five minutes. And Darkness kept holding her head and exclaiming, ‘Was it because of what happened before?! Surely Lady Iris must have realized who the thief really was! Argh, what am I gonna do?!’ …Glug, glug. Ahh! Say, bring me another Crimson Beer!”

  Aqua downed her drink in a single gulp, so excited she was practically pounding the table. Another beer was swiftly ordered.

  Beside me, Megumin took little sips of her drink and said, “Still, I’m glad to know we were summoned for something good for once. Aqua said we should have a wager about whether the news would be good or bad. She wanted to bet three thousand eris that you had committed some awful crime and were being held in detention at the Guild right about now.”

  Hey.

  “Then she said we should get our stuff together so we could make a quick exit if it turned out you’d gotten caught up in some kind of trouble,” Darkness added. “I can prove it. Just check out that backpack by her feet.”

  As Aqua merrily ordered another beer, I inspected the contents of her pack, then lit into her.

  “You jerk, acting like you were all worried about me! What’s with this backpack?! Hey, that next Crimson Beer is mine!”

  “No way—get your own! And it’s true I was a little worried! Think how hard my life would be without you! Like…! Okay, well, what about…? I mean, there’s always… Huh? Hey, Darkness, remind me what problems we would have if Kazuma disappeared.”

  “You unbelievable jerk! Do you have any idea how much I put up with from all of you?! I’m about ready to strangle you—how’s about we step outside?!”

  “Hey, what do you think you’re pulling on, you boor?! You’ll stretch my divine raiment out of shape! Stop it! Stop it already!” Aqua beat at my hand, which was clutching a fistful of her feather mantle as I tried to drag her out the door.

  Beside Aqua, Darkness took a long sniff of her wine and said tiredly, “Gosh. What Lady Iris saw in such a brutish and immature man, I’ll never know… Maybe it was his exotic appeal, plus a touch of temporary insanity…”

  A lot had happened in the capital. Some other adventurers and I had repelled an attack by the Demon King’s army, and I had protected the nobles of the city from a thief. I had even saved the entire country from a near crisis, although nobody knew it. And above all, I had gained an adorable little sister named Iris…

  “I wonder how Iris is doing anyway?” I mused. “I worry sometimes that she spends her nights weeping from loneliness… Oh, I know! I’ll ask Vanir to make a doll that looks just like me. He said his Vanir dolls that laugh in the night are a big seller. How about a Kazuma doll that laughs in the night? I could send it to Iris, and then she wouldn’t have to be lonely.”

  “Don’t you send her any bizarre gifts like that, Kazuma! Stick to letters. I can have my messenger deliver them. Try anything else, and you might be branded a terrorist and thrown in jail!”

  2

  And so a week passed after I received my reward from the Guild. We had done nothing but travel recently, and it felt good just to stay in Axel for a while.

  “Hey, who made this?! Find the chef who cooked this and tell them that Kazuma Satou, super-rich adventurer who is currently the talk of the town because of how rich he is, is asking for them!”

  “Yeah! And tell them the Arch-priest Aqua is asking for them, too!”

  With our newfound wealth, Aqua and I had quickly become patrons of Axel’s finer dining establishments, enjoying gourmet meals on a daily basis.

  A young man I took to be the chef came over to the corner of the restaurant we had claimed as our territory.

  “I-is anything the matter, honored customers? Is there a problem?” He was practically shaking at the abrupt summons.

  “Oh, no,” I said. “This meal is exquisite, and I just wanted to thank you personally. I spent a fair amount of time in the ca
stle in the capital recently, and I’m impressed that you managed to please even my discerning palate.”

  “Th-thank you very much, sir,” the chef said, bowing to us.

  Aqua wiped her lips with her napkin and said, “I’ll bet the secret ingredient in this stew is wine, correct? This richness could only come from red wine. I would say…thirty-year-old Romanée-Conti. Yes?”

  “It’s just vinegar, ma’am. I got a special deal on it earlier.”

  “Goodness. Who knew one could extract such fine flavor from cheap vinegar? Excellent work.”

  “Oh, how gracious. Thank you very much.” The chef bowed to Aqua. Now that he knew we weren’t going to yell at him, he had regained his composure.

  While the chef stood there smiling, I brandished a piece of meat on my fork at him. “The stew was good, but what really got my attention was this. This softish stuff. If I had to compare it to something, it would be… Hmm. Sneaking into the room of a girl you like, your heart pounding, and opening her closet only to discover it’s a Mimic. It’s got that powerful impact, the sort of thing that throws you off balance. You understand what I’m saying, my good chef?”

  “Not a word, sir.”

  “I see. Well, the point is, this is absolutely delicious. The Adventurer Kazuma Satou gives this restaurant three stars.”

  “I also give this restaurant three stars,” Aqua added.

  “Thank you so much,” the chef said with a broad smile. “I’ll do my best to make this shop worthy of four stars in the future.”

  I gave him several eris bills. “Ha-ha, that’s what I like to hear! It was delicious. We’ll be by another time. These bills represent our appreciation for a fine meal. Keep the change as a tip. Thanks again.”

  “Yes, thanks!” Aqua said.

  “Exact change. Well, we hope to see you again anyway. Thank you very much!” The chef remained upbeat as he saw Aqua and me out of the store.

  This was how I had spent the days since becoming a newly minted rich man with Sylvia’s bounty: living in the lap of luxury. We’d split the 300 million among the four of us, and as for me personally, I had even more cash coming to me because of my business deal with Vanir. I had enough now that I never needed to work again for the rest of my life, even if I splurged a little.