Forever Christmas

by Cat Cahill

  “Come, help,” Dora said to Penny, who still stood attached to Elizabeth’s arm in a daze. “Working will busy your mind. Then he’ll be here before you know it.”

  Penny nodded slowly. “You’re right.”

  “I’ll be there in a moment,” Elizabeth said. As soon as the girls were gone, she turned to where Landon had been standing before. He was gone now, likely up to his room to gather his coat and other necessities.

  Elizabeth raced up the stairs as fast as propriety would let her, although she doubted anyone was watching or cared at this moment. The entire hotel was in a tizzy. Just as she turned the corner to the south wing hallway, she found him. He wore that same long coat, but also carried his hat, a scarf, thick gloves, and two wool blankets.

  “Thank you,” she said. “I had to find you and tell you that before you left.”

  “I can’t stand by and let people freeze to death,” he said, placing the hat on his head. It sat at a slightly rakish angle, and Elizabeth wondered if that was how he wore it when he was out driving cattle. The mere image of it made her swallow hard.

  “I’ll bring your brother back,” he said.

  Tears stung her eyes, but Elizabeth forced them away. She wouldn’t dwell on bad possibilities; only good. So instead of mourning, she gave Landon a description of her brother as best she could remember him. “I don’t know what his wife looks like, but she should be with him.” She twisted her hands together as the worry she fought so hard to keep at bay tried to claw its way out.

  Landon set down the items in his arms, took her hands, and gently pried them apart. “I told you I’d bring your brother back. Do you trust me?”

  She dragged her eyes from his calloused hands that held hers so tightly and yet so softly, up to those eyes that seemed to know her very soul. “I do,” she said, barely audible.

  “You have my word.” He stood there a moment, not saying anything but holding her gaze.

  If she was braver—if she didn’t carry the baggage of a long and trying marriage—Elizabeth would yank her hands from his and use them to pull his face closer. Instead, she just stood there while he held her hands, her eyes, and her heart.

  He laced his fingers through hers and she thought she could stand in this one place forever, so long as he kept holding her like this and looking at her as if his life depended on her very existence.

  “Thank you again for going,” she said. “Please be safe.”

  “I will. The sooner we can rescue those folks, the sooner the train can get back on its rails, and the sooner I can get to Cañon City.” He smiled at her and rubbed his thumbs on the backs of her hands before letting go. “And now I must go.” He tugged at the brim of his hat and leaned over to pick up the blankets, scarf, and gloves. And then he winked at her and was off, around the corner to the stairs.

  Elizabeth leaned against the smooth wooden wall, barely able to understand what had just happened.

  He was still planning to take that job.

  It didn’t matter how he felt about her—or she about him. He’d taken her for granted. Led her along like a calf on a rope, only to leave her here while he went to do something he despised even though he’d be back to ranch work again as soon as the snow began to melt. He wouldn’t return to the hotel.

  One thing was clear: she cared more for him than he did for her.

  Chapter Eighteen

  The wind snapped the ends of Landon’s blanket against his coat. He had to duck his head against the snow or risk it stinging the parts of his face that were still left bare. He could barely see the horse in front of him as the rescue group rode single file down the railroad tracks. Five miles was beginning to feel more like five hundred miles.

  At least it was easy to tell they were still on the tracks. When Ulysses veered sideways, his hoofs would strike the metal rails. They couldn’t be too far away now. He promised Elizabeth he’d bring back her brother and his wife, and he’d do it, even if he froze to death in the process.

  To keep warm, he imagined the look on her face when he returned. First, her big, beautiful eyes would light up in surprise. She’d clap her hand to her mouth and run to him, ignoring anyone who might be watching. She’d fling her arms around him and press her lips to his and tell him how grateful she was that he was here.

  Of course, to imagine that, he had to ignore that strange, closed-off look she gave him right before he left. It didn’t last long, and it was barely noticeable, but her hands had gone stiff, and her smile had disappeared. It had to be fear. Nothing else made sense. She was already afraid for her brother, and now she feared him going out in this storm. Once he returned, she’d be her usual radiant self.

  A howling gust of wind threatened to tear the outermost blanket from him. He grabbed hold of it and yanked it to him, holding the ends together with one hand and the reins with the other. Next winter, he’d be warm in his own home on his own land. He’d watch blizzards like this from behind windows that overlooked acres that he owned. And if he dared hope hard enough, Elizabeth would be there with him.

  The thought made him both happy and terrified. If she agreed to marry him, and she found out later how he’d gotten the money for his own spread, she would never forgive him. Did he even deserve her if he couldn’t be honest with her? Perhaps Aimee had been right. Maybe he didn’t deserve a good woman—whether he was a poor cowboy or a rancher who’d bought his cattle with stolen money.

  The doubt gnawed away at him as they rode farther north. It was still there, freezing him from the inside out when the stopped train finally came into view.

  “Stay close to the cars if you ride down!” the man in the lead shouted over the wind as the line of riders split up to go from car to car. “Bring the extra horses up here!”

  Landon pushed Ulysses ahead. He needed to find Monroe Hartley. He dismounted at the first car, tying off his horse as fast as possible. Inside, the passengers huddled around the stove in the middle of the car.

  “Oh, thank goodness!” a woman said when she saw him.

  This was clearly a first-class car, with the passengers dressed warmly in fine coats and hats. A few of the other riders entered behind him and began escorting the passengers to the waiting horses.

  “Monroe Hartley?” Landon called out. No one responded. As Landon entered the second car and the third, with no Mr. Hartley in either of those cars either, he began to realize this rescue mission would need more than one trip back and forth to the hotel. There were simply too many passengers and not enough horses.

  In the fourth car, the scene was much like the first, with passengers crowded around a warm stove. Landon called again for Elizabeth’s brother, but this time, someone answered.

  “I’m Hartley.” A dark-haired man moved out from where he stood behind a woman who was wrapped head to toe in a coat and blankets.

  If he’d been the sort, Landon would have dropped down on his knees and thanked God right there in the train car. Instead, he whispered a quick prayer of thanks under his breath and reached out to shake Hartley’s hand. “Someone asked me specifically to look for you and your wife.”

  Hartley wrinkled his forehead. “Might I ask who?”

  Landon shook his head. It wasn’t his place to insert himself into Elizabeth’s reunion with her brother. Instead, he said simply, “I don’t know her.”

  “It must be Penny or Dora,” the woman who’d been crouching in front of him said. She rose to take his arm, and Landon presumed this was Hartley’s wife. “They have to be worried about us, especially after so many delays.”

  “We have horses outside, but not many. If you come with me, I’ll ensure you both arrive at the hotel safely.” Landon stepped back to allow the couple to go before him.

  But Hartley shook his head. “Take my wife to the hotel, please, and these other ladies and the children first. I’ll wait.”

  “I don’t want to leave you,” his wife said, turning toward him.

  Landon averted his eyes to the other passengers, not w
anting to intrude on a private moment. He did admire the man’s honor, though. He would’ve done the same if he’d been in this position.

  “I’ll be fine. You go. You need to take care of yourself, remember?” Hartley said.

  She didn’t respond, and Landon snuck a glance back to them. Hartley embraced his wife and then let go. “Go on,” he said. Then he looked up at Landon. “You’ll see her safely there?”

  “You have my word.” With a nod of his head, he guided Mrs. Hartley, four other women, and two small children toward the front of the car.

  Outside, the storm hadn’t calmed at all. One at a time, he led each woman—and carried both children—to the last remaining horses.

  “I have one more child!” one of the men shouted from the first car. “Is there any room?”

  “I’ll take him,” Landon said, tapping Ulysses into motion. He rode alongside the car, and the man placed the young boy in front of Landon.

  The boy shivered as he waved to a woman standing in the doorway to the car. Landon wrapped one of the blankets around him.

  “Is that your mama?” Landon asked.

  The boy nodded, tears beginning to drip down his cheeks.

  “I’m Mr. Cooper. What’s your name?”

  “William.”

  “Well, William, I’m personally going to make sure your mama gets to the hotel as soon as possible, all right?”

  “All right,” the boy said hesitantly. He must have been no more than five or six. Landon’s heart ached for him. The sooner they got back to the hotel, the sooner he could return for both this boy’s mother and Elizabeth’s brother. He rode back to where Hartley’s wife sat waiting on a horse with another woman.

  “Let’s go!” the man in the lead shouted over the storm.

  Slowly, the line of rescuers and passengers moved forward, into the blizzard. Landon looked back at the train, but it quickly disappeared into the snow.

  He’d heard the passengers say they’d already taken most of the extra coal meant to be used by the engine. They needed to move quickly and return before the remaining passengers ran out of heat. But as the wind blew even harder, and the snow fell faster, doubts crept into Landon’s mind.

  They’d be lucky if the group of them even made it back to the hotel without freezing first.

  Chapter Nineteen

  Elizabeth paced the distance between the fireplaces. Again. And again. And again. It had been hours since the rescuers had left

  “Stop.” A gentle hand grabbed hold of her arm. It was Dora.

  “I’m sorry. I can’t seem to remain still when we don’t know what’s happening out there.” Elizabeth waved her free hand at the hotel doors.

  Dora let go, but she didn’t move. “Penny told me about your brother.”

  Elizabeth stole a glance at Penny, whose eyes hadn’t left the window and whose hands hadn’t stopped worrying the fabric of her dress. She should be upset with Penny for betraying her confidence, but she wasn’t. Not when she couldn’t even remember why she’d kept the secret to begin with.

  “But it’s something else, isn’t it?” Dora asked.

  Elizabeth drew in a breath. Dora watched her with quiet, nonjudgmental eyes. Elizabeth had grown so used to being on her own. Although she’d befriended the handful of miners’ wives in the camp, those friendships never lasted long. The women often grew tired of the rough and dirty camp, and left to return home to await their husbands. Or the men simply gave up, and the family would leave the camp. It had been years since Elizabeth had other women she could truly confide in.

  And if anyone could understand her predicament, it was these women—Penny and Dora, and Caroline at the store—who had risked their jobs, their reputations, and their hearts for the men they loved.

  “It is,” Elizabeth said quietly.

  Dora gave her a knowing smile. “It’s easy to see if one knows what she’s looking for.”

  “What do you mean?”

  “The way you and Mr. Cooper care for each other. You’re worried for him out there, aren’t you?”

  Elizabeth sighed, scared to admit it out loud, but also relieved to share her fear with someone else. “I am. Although I shouldn’t be, I’m so afraid for him.”

  “You can’t deny your heart. I know that well enough.” Dora led Elizabeth to a nearby chair. Although hotel employees weren’t normally allowed to sit in guest areas, the blizzard seemed to blur the lines of propriety. No one had said anything, and even Mrs. Ruby sat in a wing chair near the fire, deep in conversation with Mrs. McFarland.

  “That isn’t it.” Elizabeth glanced out the window. The snow was relentless. She tried not to think about it, but it was hard to ignore the danger everyone out there faced.

  Dora tilted her head. “Then what’s troubling you? Besides the storm.”

  Elizabeth closed her eyes. He’d said those words so loosely, almost as if they didn’t matter. Almost as if they didn’t break her heart upon their impact. “He’s leaving.”

  Dora said nothing. Instead, she reached for Elizabeth’s hand and just held it, letting her know she was there to listen.

  “He has work waiting for him in Cañon City. But he said it wasn’t anything he cared to do. His regular work will be available again in spring. The longer he remained here, the more I believed he’d decided not to take on that other job. I thought, perhaps, he stayed here because of me. I’ve been so foolish.” She shook her head. She wouldn’t cry. She hadn’t in years, and she wouldn’t now. Not in the hotel lobby in front of everyone.

  “Perhaps he means to return after he finishes his work?” Dora said.

  “But wouldn’t he have said as much? Why would he tell me he was leaving, then give me a smile, and go? He had to know what he was doing. He was letting me down, telling me that what we have isn’t . . . isn’t what I thought it was.” Her voice broke on the last word, and Elizabeth clamped her mouth shut.

  “I don’t know,” Dora said. “Men are strange with their words at times. They don’t say things they should, and say things they shouldn’t.”

  “He had to know what he was saying.” Elizabeth turned her gaze to the window again. “He never says much, but what he does say always matters. If he intended to return, he would have told me.”

  Dora squeezed her hand. “He’ll be back here soon with the passengers. Maybe you can speak with him then?”

  Elizabeth shook her head. She wouldn’t seek him out. She’d already embarrassed herself enough, falling for yet another heartless cowboy. She’d been nothing but a passing entertainment for him. And the sooner she came to terms with that, the better off she would be. At least he was honorable enough to help find her brother. “I have my work here. I hope I’m proving to Mrs. Ruby that I’m worthy of becoming a Gilbert Girl.”

  “Oh, I have no doubt about that. Mrs. Ruby has praised your initiative more than once. And you’ve caught on quickly at the lunch counter. Before you know it, you’ll have a contract and a place in the dining room,” Dora said.

  A knock sounded at the door, and the entire room went still for a solid second before it burst into motion again. Both Elizabeth and Dora jumped up.

  “It’s the passengers!” someone shouted.

  “Quick, girls!” Mrs. Ruby leapt up faster than Elizabeth had thought she was capable. “Help the maids get these people to their rooms, and then come to the kitchen to fetch them some soup.”

  Elizabeth remained planted in place as the other girls moved forward. She held a hand to her mouth as she searched the people streaming inside from the storm. He had to be there. He simply had to.

  She didn’t even know which he she was hoping to see as she scanned the faces. They were all women, and some children, except for the riders who’d gone to find them.

  “Is that everyone?” Mr. McFarland asked.

  “No. There are still some women and all of the men onboard. We need to go out again,” a man said, his face bright red from the cold.

  “I’ll go with you. The hote
l can watch itself.” Mr. McFarland disappeared, as his wife trailed after him, begging him to dress appropriately for the storm.

  Beside her, Penny slumped into a chair. “He isn’t there.”

  “Of course he isn’t,” Adelaide said. “Didn’t you hear the man?”

  “I know.” Penny shut her eyes. “I just hoped . . .”

  Elizabeth had hoped too. She scanned the faces one more time until her eyes landed on Landon in the very back. He was wrapped in a coat and blanket and carried a child who appeared to be asleep in his arms.

  “Landon!” she said without thinking. She ran forward, ignoring the sensible part of herself that promised not to seek him out again. She didn’t intend to ask him about his feelings for her or his future plans; she wanted only to know if he’d seen her brother or Sheriff Young. And to find out why he was carrying a child.

  “Elizabeth. Follow me.” He led the way down the north wing hall, and Elizabeth rushed to keep up with him. One of the maids ushered them into a room. She pulled down the bedcovers as Landon set the boy on a chair. “He needs to get these wet clothes off. Make him as warm as possible. He passed out about halfway here. I’m afraid . . .” He didn’t finish the sentence, and he didn’t need to.

  Elizabeth jumped into action, helping the maid peel off the boy’s snow-soaked coat and clothing. She wrapped him in a towel and laid him on the bed. “Do we have any hot irons?”

  The maid nodded and ran from the room.

  Briefly, Elizabeth realized she was breaking the cardinal rule in the hotel by being alone with Landon, but surely no one cared right now. Besides, this little boy was here too. Not to mention she had no intention of letting Landon get close to her again. He’d already made his plans quite clear, and Elizabeth refused to be taken for a fool again.

  “His name is William,” Landon said. He reached out and put a hand on the little boy’s arm.

  Elizabeth’s heart ached. “We’ll do everything we can. I promise.”

  Landon stood for a moment, quiet, with his hand resting on William’s arm. “I know you will,” he finally said, shrugging off the blanket.