Then, Now, Always

by Mona Shroff

  A couple hours passed and Sam was considering sending Samantha a text to see how her project was going, when there was a pounding at his door. Someone was calling to him from the other side.

  “Mr. Hutcherson! Are you there? It’s Will and I have Samantha!” Panic laced the boy’s voice. More banging. “Mr. Hutcherson? Please be there!”

  Sam’s stomach did a flip as he bolted to the door. He opened it to find Samantha leaning on Will, her hair tousled and eyes half shut. She was barely able to stand.

  “What did you do to her?” Sam shouted at the boy as he grabbed Samantha from him. She reeked of alcohol.

  Will’s eyes flew open. “Nothing, Mr. Hutcherson. I swear. I got a text from Lisa, and she was like this when I got to Stacy’s. I didn’t know what to do, so I brought her here.”

  “Sit!” Sam motioned to Will, as he pointed at the sofa. Samantha was babbling.

  “Aww, hey, it’s Sammy!” She giggled. “Don’t yell at good William.”

  Sam gaped at her, aghast. “She’s drunk!”

  “I know!” Will looked nervous as he noted Sam’s clenched fists. “I told her not to go.”

  “Hey, Sammy! Hey, Dad!” She put her index finger to her mouth. “Don’t tell my mom. She’ll freak.” She doubled over in laughter.

  Sam placed Samantha on the sofa and took out his phone to call Maya. She picked up on the second ring.

  “Hey, Sam.” There was a smile in her voice that any other time, he might’ve been happy to hear.

  “Maya. Are you still in Manhattan?” He couldn’t keep his voice neutral.

  “Yes, I just finished dinner with Ami.” Concern filled her voice. “What’s going on, Sam? Did she have another allergic reaction?”

  “Um, no. Nothing like that, but you might want to come over here.” He hesitated. There was not a gentle way to say it. “Samantha’s drunk.” A small part of him did spark to life when he registered that she wasn’t with Leo.

  “What?” Concern turned to anger. “Did she go to that party?” She was yelling into the phone as if she were talking to Samantha herself.

  Sam was not fazed by her anger. “Party? She told me she was going to work on a school project!” He glared at Samantha on the sofa next to Will. She was trying to kiss him and Will was doing his best to keep her under control, all the while throwing fearful and furtive glances in Sam’s direction.

  “On a Friday night, Sam?” His stomach plummeted at the exasperation in her voice. “Really?”

  Oh. His grip on the phone tightened as he realized he’d been played. “Just come over, okay? We can talk about how gullible I am later.” First anaphylactic shock, now this. He was the worst parent ever. Maya would definitely never leave him alone with Samantha after this.

  “Be there in fifteen.” She disconnected.

  He tapped his phone with such violence, it was as if he was punishing it for his own naivete.

  Sam grabbed a bottle of Gatorade from the kitchen and handed it to Samantha. He got her to take a few sips.

  “Oh, Dad. I don’t feel so good.” Her voice was small and she seemed to forget Will as she reached for Sam.

  “Okay, up you go.” He stood to help her up to the hallway bathroom. Will held her other side. They made it down the hallway and to the door of the bathroom, when Samantha vomited all over the floor and herself, and also managed to get the two of them. Sam grimaced; his reflexes must not be what they used to be.

  “Fantastic, Samantha.” He closed his eyes. “Lucky for you, I’m used to this.”

  He nodded to Will as he finally just picked Samantha up and carried her into the bathroom. “Don’t you go anywhere,” Sam growled at him. “I’m not done with you yet.”

  Will turned pale.

  Samantha was crying now; the tears smeared her makeup and made black streaks down her face. Sam cleaned her up the best he could when she vomited again. At least this time, she made it to the toilet.

  “Dad. Please.” She hiccuped and tried to wipe her face. “Don’t tell Mom.”

  “She’ll be here any minute.” Sam crouched down to where she was seated on the bathroom floor.

  “What? You called her?” Samantha’s indignation amused Sam, because she was in a lot of trouble. “I can’t believe you did that. She’ll kill me.” Her eyes were frantic and she pouted like a petulant toddler. “How could you do that?”

  “Well, she is your mother—”

  “She’ll never let me out again! I thought I could trust you!” She narrowed her eyes at him and spit out her words with as much venom as she could muster in her present state. “I hate you.”

  It actually might have been painful for Sam to hear his daughter proclaim her hate for him, except for the fact that she was drunk, she’d lied to him and, quite frankly, he wasn’t too thrilled with her right now, either. There was a knock at the bathroom door.

  “Sam? It’s me.” Maya’s voice came through the door.

  Sam stood and opened the door.

  She covered her mouth with her hand as she wrinkled her nose. “She got you, huh?”

  He nodded somberly.

  “Who’s that boy?” Maya spoke through her hand. “He’s got vomit on him, too. He was cleaning the floor out here.”

  “That’s Will.”

  “Who’s Will?”

  Sam turned back to Samantha, jaw clenched. “Will Waters, her boyfriend.”

  “Her what?” Maya’s voice rose in pitch as she looked from Sam to Samantha.

  Sam narrowed his eyes at Samantha and shook his head in disappointment. He sighed and turned to Maya. “I’ll get her clothes so you can change her and we’ll put her to bed.” He frowned as he raised his eyebrows. “Then we can catch up.”

  While Maya took care of Samantha, Sam used the shower in his room to clean up. He emerged from the bathroom, a towel wrapped around his waist, to find Samantha passed out, half in, half out of his bed, and Maya futilely trying to get her all the way in.

  “Need some help?” He started toward Samantha.

  “Sure.” Maya turned to face him and quickly turned away, using her hand to shield her eyes. “Pants, Sam! Put on pants.”

  “Oh, yeah. Right.” He grinned at her back as he quickly slipped on jeans and discarded the towel. “Okay.”

  She cautiously removed her hand and turned toward him. “Fine.” She cleared her throat and appeared to be trying to suppress a smile. “Um, you get her legs.”

  “Actually, I got her.” He motioned for Maya to step aside. She stepped back, but he was acutely aware of her presence as he bent over and picked up his daughter like a baby, settling her comfortably in the bed.

  “Thanks.” Maya reached over and pulled the covers over Samantha. “She just stumbled in here and passed out, and I, uh, couldn’t move her.”

  Maya was looking everywhere but at him.

  He studied her a moment. “Are you okay?”

  “Yeah, sure. I’m fine.” She managed brief eye contact. “Why wouldn’t I be?”

  “No reason.” He smirked. The flush on her skin captivated him, and he couldn’t look away.

  Maya cleared her throat. “I suppose we deal with this boy now.”

  “Is he still here?”

  Maya inhaled deeply. “Apparently, you told him to stay.” She dipped her head at him, and wildly waved in the direction of his torso. “But you might want to, um...well, put on a shirt first.” She was suddenly interested in Samantha’s blankets. “And you’re still wet—your hair...” The wave became an abstract motion in the direction of his head.

  “Right.” He toweled off and pulled on an old concert T-shirt.

  Maya smiled. “You still have that?”

  “Hell, yeah. It’s Hootie. Come on.”

  She actually laughed. A real, genuine sound that reminded him of summer—that summer. “Not
hing wrong with Hootie, but that shirt has seen better days.” Her gaze lingered a bit longer than necessary, and when he caught her looking, she flushed again.

  He opened the door and allowed her to walk through first. The scent of honeysuckle wafted by as she passed him and he was momentarily frozen in the doorway.

  She took a few steps and turned back to him. “Aren’t you coming?”

  “Oh, yeah—of course.” He gathered himself and followed her out.

  “Teenagers.” She treated him to her crooked smile and shook her head.

  Will was sitting on the edge of his chair when the two of them came out. Sam noticed that the floor was clean and that Will had done the best he could to clean himself off, too. He had cleats on his feet, and was still wearing his shin guards. Will started to stand as they approached.

  Sam motioned for him to stay seated. He folded his arms across his chest and looked down at Will on the sofa. “What happened?” It was a demand, no doubt. But this boy had just brought home his intoxicated daughter. Sam would be nice when it was warranted.

  Will threw an apprehensive glance at Maya.

  “I’m her mother.” She extended her hand to him.

  He shook her hand. “Nice to meet you, Mrs. Hutcherson. Oh, cr—I’m sorry, it’s Mrs. Rao, like Samantha. Sorry.” Color rose to his face and he wiped his hand on his shorts.

  Sam and Maya deftly avoided looking at one another by concentrating on Will. Maya sat down across from Will, while Sam continued to stand. Sam felt a gentle tug on his T-shirt, and looked down to see Maya nodding at him to sit. Sam bit the inside of his cheek and glowered in Will’s direction, but sat down next to her.

  “Fine, okay.” Will began. “There was a party at Paul Jameson’s and Brittany Stevenson was going.”

  Sam and Maya both groaned at the mention of the girl’s name.

  Will’s smile was sardonic. “Yeah, I know, right?”

  Sam glared at him. Will cleared his throat and continued, “So, anyway, Brittany dared Samantha to show up. I told her it wasn’t worth it and I didn’t think she should go. Brittany always brings alcohol to these parties and they get out of hand. And I didn’t want her to get into any more trouble.” He looked away for a split second. “She was kind of mad at me about that.”

  Sam grunted acknowledgment. He’d known something was up with Samantha and Will.

  Will leaned toward them and held his hands out for emphasis. “See, Brittany never got over the whole shoplifting thing and has had it out for Samantha all year. That whole marijuana in Samantha’s locker thing...everyone knows Brittany put it there.”

  Sam saw fury in Will’s eyes and paid closer attention to the boy.

  Will continued, his voice rough with anger. “Brittany totally deserved that punch Samantha gave her. It was awesome.” The boy looked past Sam and Maya and seemed to get lost in the memory.

  Maya gently elbowed Sam. He cut his eyes to her just as the edges of her mouth turned up into a ghost of a smile.

  “Continue,” Maya encouraged Will.

  “Oh, yeah. So, Samantha said there was no way she was going to back down from Brittany. Especially since Brittany kept going on about how Samantha was only allowed back at school because of gym equipment.” Will shook his head in bewilderment. “Not sure what all that is about. Brittany’s probably just making things up to get to Samantha.”

  Sam shifted uncomfortably in his seat.

  “Samantha wouldn’t listen to anyone. So, she went to the party and Lisa went with her. A little past nine, I got a text from Lisa to hurry up and come over there.” He pulled out his phone and showed it to Sam. “You can check my phone if you want.”

  Sam took the proffered phone, and sure enough the text from Lisa was there. He handed it back to Will.

  “When I got there, Lisa told me Brittany had challenged Samantha to some kind of drinking contest. So, she’d had about four shots when Lisa got scared and texted me to come get her. And I saw beer there, but no one knew if Samantha had had any or not. That’s all I know.” Fear and apprehension flickered over his face and he flicked his gaze between them.

  “Why weren’t you at the party?” Maya asked.

  “I had soccer practice until 9:15. I saw the text from Lisa as soon as I was done, and raced over there. I didn’t know what else to do.” His words tumbled over each other in their effort to provide the answer required.

  “No, that’s fine, Will. You did the right thing bringing her here.” Sam was forced to concede that the boy’s story was legit. “How did you know where I was?”

  “It’s on her phone. And I live in this building, too. Twenty-third floor.”

  Fantastic. What were the odds? “Yeah. Okay. You can go.” He caught Maya’s eye and they stood in unison.

  Will stood and put his hands in his pockets as he passed them. “Well, good night.” He ducked his head and looked at Maya, blue eyes wide with concern. “She’ll be all right?”

  “She’ll be fine.” Maya walked Will to the door, but not before Sam received an elbow to the ribs and a mild glare.

  Sam pursed his lips together. Message received. He offered his hand to Will. “Listen, Will. Thanks for bringing her home. And for looking out for her.” He flicked his eyes to Maya. “Her mother and I really appreciate it.”

  Will shook Sam’s hand, maybe with more enthusiasm than was necessary. “Sure thing, Mr. Hutcherson. Anything for Samantha.”

  Sam couldn’t help but smile softly. “I know the feeling.”

  * * *

  NO SOONER HAD Maya shut the door on Will, than Sam collapsed on the sofa and threw his head back. He pressed the palms of his hands into his eyes. “I’m really bad at this, Maya.”

  She sighed as she collapsed beside him. Along with the flowery scent of her perfume, she brought the warm aroma of burnt sugar. “Well, yeah.”

  “Great. Is that supposed to make me feel better?”

  “No.” She pulled his hands away from his eyes. Her cool touch soothed every part of him. “You just haven’t been doing this very long.” She blew air out of her mouth. “And anyway, I knew she wanted to go to that party. I just didn’t think she’d try to play you. I should’ve at least warned you.” She shook her head. “Next time we’ll be better prepared.”

  “She said she hated me.” Sam sounded more wounded than he intended.

  Maya chuckled. “Well, that’s a good start. If she doesn’t hate me once a month, I feel like I’m not doing my job correctly.”

  “She hates me for calling you. Like I wouldn’t be mad she showed up drunk at my door with her boyfriend. I screwed that up, too. I should’ve at least given you a heads-up. She said she was going to tell you about Will months ago. And I believed her. Just like I believed she was going to ‘study’ tonight.” He dropped his head in embarrassment.

  Maya nodded her head in understanding. She took his hand in both of hers and squeezed firmly. “You’ve only been doing this for a few months. You’re still like a buddy to her. She’s not used to having a real father any more than you’re used to having a teenage daughter.” She trailed off at the end as if she realized again why that was true and attempted to pull her hands away from his.

  Sam held on to one of her hands.

  “I get why you came to me for help with Samantha’s school situation.” He turned on the sofa so he was facing her, and softened his voice. “When Will showed up with Samantha in that condition and I thought he’d done something to her—” he narrowed his eyes and almost growled with the memory “—I would’ve done anything to keep her safe.”

  He held her gaze a beat too long. She looked away and slipped her hand back.

  “So, ‘gym equipment’?” She was suspicious.

  Rightfully so.

  Sam cleared his throat. “Um, well.” He hung his head. “Okay, here’s the thing.” He turned back to Maya
, knowing she was going to be mad. “I was able to intimidate Byron into dropping those charges against Samantha, and the juvenile courts responded to my name and connections. But Mrs. Pappenberger—” Sam exhaled and shook his head “—that woman did not respond to intimidation or connections or anything.”

  “Not even your charms?” Maya snickered.

  “Nothing worked.” Sam raised his arms in exasperation. “Until she happened to mention that the school hadn’t had new gym equipment for fifteen years.” Sam peeked at Maya through his lashes. “So, I wrote a check—but I insisted on being anonymous. Byron must have found out.”

  Maya’s eyes widened. “Are you serious? You had to pay her off?” There was a touch of anger in her words. “Why didn’t you say anything?” Her words were coming fast and hard. “You should’ve told me. I never expected—money—that’s not why I came to you.”

  “Whoa, I know that.” Great. He’d known she would be mad. Sam placed his hand on hers. “Don’t be upset—I wanted to tell you, but then you got upset over the soccer fees...” He trailed off, but was hopeful when she didn’t pull away from him. “Besides, we had to get the school to back down. I was still in shock about finding out Samantha existed—I would’ve done anything you asked. I couldn’t let you down.” It was Sam’s turn to ramble. “Writing a check was something I could do—at the very least I could offer her money.”

  “Sam.” Maya was sharp, her voice a shocked whisper. “Is that what you...” She forced him to look at her. “You have a lot more to offer her than money.” She clasped his hand in hers, as if trying to transfer strength to him. “And you absolutely have not let me down.”

  She smiled at him, her crooked smile. It was a simple thing, but her eyes glowed, her cheeks flushed, and it reached all the way into the part of him that had always belonged to her, and he couldn’t remember why he was angry with her, or why he had let her go in the first place. He was unable to tear himself away from that smile, even though he knew his face revealed everything in his heart. There was, simply, nothing to be done about that. She was as lost in him as he was in her. There was nothing to hide behind here.