Healing

by Kennington, Belinda

  She opened her arms and Trent pulled her into a hug. “Good. It’s nice to be here. How are you?”

  “I’m great.” Becca was a pretty little thing, standing at 5’3”, a couple of inches shorter than Allison. There I go. This trip was to let heads clear. Allison was all he thought about on the plane. She was so adorable standing outside her building watching him leave. She won’t admit she liked him right now but her body language said otherwise. He hoped when he got back things would advance, but right now it was about family. “Where’s my granddaughter?”

  “Faith’s in her playpen.” Becca pointed into the living room. “I’m going to check on dinner. It’s almost done.” Becca excused herself.

  Trent bee-lined it to the living room. She was getting to the fun age. “How’s my beautiful granddaughter?” He reached in and picked her up, raising her above his head. She giggled and reached out to him. Pulling her into his arms, he gave her a tight squeeze. He took her to the couch and tickled her tummy, listening to her wonderful laugh.

  “So, how’s work going, John?”

  John joined him on the couch. “Really good. We’re getting ready for the next show. We talked a famous artist into showing his work with us.”

  “Good for you.” John kept the details at a minimum. Trent was thankful, he understood little about what his son did. Early in John’s life it was a stressor between them. He didn’t know how in the world he’d make a living, but when Trent accepted and supported John’s artistic side they were able to move forward.

  “How’s things in Lincoln?”

  “Good. The new plant is coming along and we should be able to start operations on time.” Trent kept his info short and sweet too. John got bored with business details.

  Becca came into the living room. “Dinner’s ready.”

  Trent handed over Faith and followed them into the dining room. Becca put Faith in the highchair and began passing the food around starting with small portions for Faith. Trent watched Becca feed her baby. She smiled and giggled with her.

  It reminded him of Ruth with John when he was a baby. She was so good with him, taking care of him every minute of the day. But as the years went on she became more distant. If there was one thing he wanted from Ruth, it was to know why she left her son.

  After dinner, Trent and his son went out on the front porch and sat on the swing staring into the night sky. Trent needed to tell John his mother came back. How do you bring up a difficult topic? He sighed. “John?”

  “Yeah?”

  “You’re mom came to see me.” He looked at his son. He expected to see surprise, but John’s expression stayed calm.

  “I know, she called me.”

  Trent was the one surprised. “What? Wait, how’d she get your number?”

  “She said from you.”

  “I didn’t give it to her.” He sighed and slapped his hand on his forehead. “My address book. I should have told you on the phone.” What else did she go through in my office? He couldn’t figure out what she was up to. How wrong in the brain could she be, to think she could walk back into their lives like nothing happened? Where had she been all those years?

  “What did she say? No, wait, you don’t have to tell me. It’s none of my business.”

  “It’s okay, Dad. She said she wanted to start over. She knew she screwed up and hoped I would forgive her.”

  Trent worried she had other motives for coming back. After so many years he didn’t trust her but hoped her words were honest.

  “She asked about you.” John said.

  “I’m sure. She wants us to pick up where we left off.”

  “She asked if you were seeing anyone. I didn’t know what to say.”

  Trent’s thoughts went automatically to Allison.

  John bumped Trent lightly with his elbow. “From that smile, I’d would say that’s a yes.”

  “I’m working on it.”

  “Who is she?”

  “Isn’t this weird for you? Talking to your dad about him dating?”

  “No, talk to me. It would be nice to know you’re not alone.”

  “Her name is Allison. We went to high school together. I liked her back then, but we lost contact. Years later we reconnected on Facebook. Her husband died a couple of years back. I know this sounds horrible, but I feel it’s our turn. I’ve kinda been waiting for her to finish mourning.”

  “It’s not horrible. I say go for it.”

  “She lives in Lincoln.”

  “Thinking about moving?”

  “Possibly. I could get a job there.” Trent had thought of the possibilities that Lincoln could bring. It was a large city with many business choices.

  “What about the new plant? You could work there.”

  Trent shrugged. “Maybe.” Trent smiled and patted his son on the back. “I told your mother it was over between us but hopefully you can rebuild a relationship with her.”

  “I don’t know. It’ll be a while before I can trust her. I guess I’ll try as long as she does.”

  “Just be careful. She’s different.”

  ***

  “See you soon. Love you.” Allison put the phone on the hook. Her father’s plane had landed and they were finishing up at the car rental. He was such a stubborn man, not telling her when his flight would arrive so she could meet him. He didn’t want her to waste gas when they would be driving to her house anyways.

  “Liz, Stephen. Grandpa and Cindy will be here shortly. Make sure you’re ready to go.”

  Fifteen minutes later Allison’s father pulled up. He jumped out, pulled the suitcases out, and walked with Cindy in tow up to the door as Allison opened it.

  He father grabbed Allison up in a bear hug. “It’s great to see you.” He pushed her back to arm’s length. “You look great.”

  “Thanks, Dad.”

  He let go and stepped into the living room where Stephen and Liz were standing. “There’s my grandkids.” He ruffled Stephen’s hair then put an arm around his shoulder. “Wow, you’ve had to have grown a foot since last I’d seen you. How’s school?”

  Stephen squared his shoulders. “Good. I made next year’s football team.”

  “You’ll be great.” He held his hand out for a high five, which Stephen reciprocated.

  “Hey, grandpa.” Liz stepped up to them with her arms out to the side.

  “Liz, my girl. You’ve grown into a beautiful young woman.” Her grandfather pulled her close and gave her a big hug. “I can’t believe you’ll be an adult next week. Speaking of which, everyone ready for dinner?”

  “You don’t want to rest first?” Allison asked.

  “No, we rested plenty on the flight.”

  Liz got to pick where they went for her birthday dinner and she decided on Chili’s. Sitting around the table, out of the blue, Cindy asked. “So Allison, do you have a special gentleman in your life yet?”

  Allison coughed, bringing the bite of food back out of her windpipe. “No.”

  “Mom has a guy who’s interested.” Liz blurted out.

  Allison’s face flared. Why does Cindy think she has the right to ask such a question? She wanted to run into the bathroom and splash water on herself to cool down.

  “Who is he?” Her father asked.

  Allison looked into his smiling face, then glanced at everyone else. Everyone stared waiting for a response with excitement in their eyes, except Stephen. He stared intently at his food. He’s not ready. I should talk to him. If she was going to have the possibility of a future not alone she’d need to know he’d be okay.

  “Everyone thinks my friend Trent, likes me.”

  “Is he cute?”

  Ugh! Another inappropriate question from Cindy.

  Liz spoke up. “He is. He’s been in town cuz he’s heading up an expansion for his company.”

  How did Liz know that? “Okay people, I think it’s time to change the subject. Liz graduates from high school next month.”

  That did it. Everyone turned their
attention to Liz, instead of Allison’s love life or more accurately, lack thereof. She still wondered how Liz knew why Trent was here. She must have talked to Emily.

  Sixteen

  Liz headed to the bathroom. Everyone was settled in. Grandpa and Cindy were set up in the guestroom at the end of the hall. Mom had called it an early night, saying she needed to be up early. It was a good first night, even though for a moment at the restaurant, she was worried her mom would go over the table and strangle Cindy. She was always tense when Cindy was around and even worse, she hated when people got into her business.

  Going back to her room, she passed her mom’s room and pressed her ear quietly to the door. Down the hall, Stephen’s door opened. He stepped into the hall and joined Liz. Most nights they heard their mom crying. Liz put her hand on Stephen’s shoulder and patted a couple of times. He continued down the hall to the bathroom.

  She didn’t understand why her mom was holding onto their father. It had been two years. Shouldn’t she have gone through the mourning process already? Liz had so many grief counselors talk to her the first year she knew the process by heart and hadn’t seen her mom go through the full cycle. It seemed she was stuck at the denial stage.

  Liz shook her head and went to her room. She wished her mom would let them in. Her mom thought she was protecting them from the pain, but really it caused more. Liz would be moving soon and wouldn’t be around to take care of her. She worried that when she moved out, her mom would become even more reclusive. Liz was rooting for Trent. He seemed to wake her up.

  Dressing in her shorts and t-shirt she wore as pajamas, she climbed into bed. She lay in bed trying to think of a plan to help but sleep finally won out. Her eye lids closed but a moment later she awoke with the sensation of rushing wind. She stood at the end of the backyard looking at the back of her house. She looked down at her bare feet and wiggled her toes. She felt the grass beneath her feet. She scanned the area curious how she’d gotten outside. “Dad?”

  Her father smiled and opened his arms. She ran to him and he wrapped her in his safe embrace. “Dad, I’ve missed you so much.”

  “I’ve missed you too, sweetheart.”

  “It’s been so hard without you around.” She cried on his shirt while he patted her on the back. She’d forgotten how good it was to be held by her dad.

  “I’ve been watching over all of you. You know, it’s not so bad on this side.” He let her cry and get the tears out.

  “You’re not really here, are you?” She leaned back. He seemed real. “Am I?”

  “You don’t overlook anything, do you?”

  “Nope, I wouldn’t be any good in forensic science if I did.”

  “That’s my girl. I’m so proud of you.” He put his hand on her shoulder and pulled her in for another hug.

  She wrapped her arms around his waist then looked into his face. “I’m waiting for an answer.”

  He smiled. “Okay, this is the only way I’m able to communicate with any of you.”

  “Interesting, why?”

  He pushed her out to arms length and held her shoulder. “I’m worried about your mom. She hasn’t let me go. She’s not living.”

  “Yeah, everyone’s worried.”

  “Dad?” Liz spun around. Stephen stood a few feet away, eyes wide. Liz stepped back to give them a moment.

  Their dad wrapped his arms around Stephen and held tight. “Hey, son.” Stephen buried his face in their father’s chest.

  Liz saw the track of moisture run down Stephen’s cheek. Stephen had really shot up in the last couple of years. Less than half a foot difference in their height. After a moment, Rick opened his arm to Liz. She rushed to them and joined the reunion.

  Stephen stepped back, wiping at his face. “What’s going on? Am I dreaming?”

  “Kind of.” Liz stepped up to Stephen. “Astro projection.”

  “Sure…” He said slowly, nodding his head. “I think I’ll stick with dreaming.”

  Rick put one hand on each of their shoulders. “It’s good to be able to talk to both of you. I’m worried about your mom. I think your mom needs a little…nudge.”

  “I’m thinking more like a shove.” Liz said thinking of all the times she has hinted to her mom about getting a life and the blunt times that were ignored. Liz tried many times to get her to go out and have fun instead of staying locked inside cleaning or reading. That’s all she did anymore. “She’s stubborn.”

  “I agree, but I think her excuse right now is you two. If you both show her you’re fine…”

  “She did go out a couple of nights ago.”

  “I know. She went dancing with Emily.”

  “How did you know?” Stephen folded his arms in front of himself.

  “I’ve been looking out for all of you. I need to know you’re all happy.”

  Liz fought back the emotions. Her dad cared so much about them and loved their mother so deeply but was he really okay with her dating again? Liz had to know for sure their father was ready. “I think there’s someone that likes Mom.”

  “Yes, Trent. A friend from high school. He’s liked her for a long time. I’ve been trying to get her to open her eyes to what’s in front of her.”

  “You’re okay with it?” She was shocked her father would want this.

  “Yes. It’s not easy to think about your mom with someone else, but it’s harder to see her suffering. Trent is good person and he can make her happy.”

  “What can we do?” Liz asked.

  Stephen threw his hands in the air. “No. No one will replace you.”

  Liz and their father looked at him for a moment. Rick reached out to him. “Son.”

  Stephen stepped back. “No. Mom doesn’t need to date. She’s your wife and our mom.”

  Rick grabbed him by the shoulders. “Listen. Your mom is suffering. I know you all are and it’s hard to let me go, but you have to. Go easy on her.”

  Stephen nodded, but didn’t speak, his face twisted in pain. Liz saw the strain in him as he tried not to cry. Her throat tightened with her own effort.

  “I love your mom and I want her to be happy. I can’t be here for her. Liz is going to college soon and you only have a few more years at home. Then she’s alone.”

  “I don’t want her to be alone.” Barely a whisper escaped Stephen.

  “I want your mom to smile and have it reach her eyes. For her to laugh and truly feel it. I hope for her to be loved and let it fill her with joy. It pains me to see the woman that was once so full of life, to now only be a shell of her former self.”

  “I thought we would betray you, if Mom found someone else and we liked him too.” Stephen took a step towards them again.

  Rick messed Stephen’s hair and patted him on the back. “No, your mom and I love each other. There’s nothing that will ever change that.” He grinned. “You have my permission, even though you didn’t need it, to let Trent be in your life.”

  Stephen nodded his head, a smile lifting his mouth. “What do you want us to do?”

  “I don’t know. I’m sure you two will think of something.”

  Liz rolled her eyes. “Thanks, Dad.”

  “Whatever you come up with needs to come from your acceptance, from your heart.” He pulled them in again and hugged them tight. “It’s time for me to go.

  “Oh, Dad, do you have to?” Liz asked wrapping her arms around him.

  He kissed the top of her head. “Yes, but remember, I will always love you.”

  “I love you. Goodbye.”

  “Son, be the man I know you are. I love you.”

  “Love you, Dad.”

  ***

  Liz woke with a start. She scrambled out of bed and ran to her window. She looked down into the dark. Scanning the backyard, she hoped she’d see her dad one last time.

  Liz’s shoulders slumped. It was a long shot. She climbed back in bed, propping her back against the headboard. Putting her pillow in her lap she brought her knees up, hugging them as she sat in t
he dark staring out the window.

  A light knock on the door, then it opened slowly. Stephen’s head emerged around it.

  “Hi.” Liz whispered.

  He entered without a word and sat on the edge of her bed.

  “Couldn’t sleep?”

  He shook his head.

  Liz looked back out the window waiting for him to talk. She wondered if he was questioning what he’d woken up from. She needed to know it really happened.

  He stood and walked over to her window staring out into the backyard. “I dreamt about Dad.”

  “I don’t think it was dream. Dad visited us.” She leaned forward hugging the pillow tighter. “I miss him so much.”

  “Me too.” He rested against the wall, continuing to stare out into the backyard.

  Liz sat back again. They stayed in the dark silence for a while. Then suddenly, Stephen straightened and leaned close to the window then waved Liz over.

  “What’s going on?” Liz asked, as she scrambled out of her bed and stood next to him.

  “Be quiet.” He whispered, then pointed out the window.

  Liz eagerly searched for their father. How amazing would it be to see him again, and not in a dream. She scanned the yard, but didn’t see anything. “What?”

  He pointed again. “At the end of the yard, in the bushes.”

  Focusing her attention to the bushes she squinted, trying to find what Stephen was talking about. Then she saw something move. “Oh. Is that an animal?” Going down onto her knees she peeked over the window ledge, then grabbed Stephen and pulled him down next to her.

  “I don’t think animals walk on two legs.”

  “Very funny.” Liz elbowed him in the ribs. The movement kept in the shadow and Liz couldn’t tell what it looked like. They watched as the person moved around the bushes. It even appeared the person looked in the direction of the house several times. “What’s he doing?”

  “I don’t know. But I’m not going to wait.” Stephen stood and walked over to the wall.

  As Liz watched the person out the window, Stephen flipped on the light. Automatically, the person’s head snapped towards the light, and then he took off running through the alley. Stephen turned the light off again and came back to the window. They watched till the person disappeared down the block.