Book Read Free

Yolo

Page 13

by Lauren Myracle


  SnowAngel:

  uh-huh. that’s why I’m on the fence about whether to depledge or not. I JUST CAN’T DECIDE.

  SnowAngel:

  like, I’ve met some super-nice girls, esp Anna, and I love the times when a bunch of us get together and paint each other’s nails and eat popcorn and just hang out. I have fun at the mixers too.

  mad maddie:

  that sorority leader girl called u a twat, Angela.

  SnowAngel:

  and a fucking diaper-wearing baby

  mad maddie:

  wha . . . ? you didn’t tell me the diaper-wearing-baby one

  SnowAngel:

  a *fucking* diaper-wearing baby. get it right. god.

  mad maddie:

  hey, I know. you shld depledge and move to Santa Cruz and be with me. I wld even paint yr nails.

  SnowAngel:

  *pinches Maddie’s cheeks*

  SnowAngel:

  awww, sweet Maddie. if only!

  Wed, Oct 16, 10:00 AM P.D.T.

  mad maddie:

  ooo, wait! what’s the latest on Lucy what’s-her-face? yr roomie?

  mad maddie:

  is she still stealing Q-tips and raisins? have u reported her to campus police?

  mad maddie:

  An-ge-la!!!!

  mad maddie:

  seriously? yr gone? where did u go and why aren’t u coming back?

  mad maddie:

  grrr. curse yr oily hide!

  Thu, Oct 17, 12:42 PM E.D.T.

  zoegirl:

  I got an app for my phone called MapMyRun that tells you how far you go, and today I ran two miles!

  SnowAngel:

  Zo, that’s awesome!

  zoegirl:

  for any real runner, two miles would be nothing. but thx, cuz for me, the actual running part still sucks and I *always* want to stop two minutes into it.

  zoegirl:

  but I tell myself, “you can do hard things. you can persevere.” and then I think about Doug, and how hard it is to go on without him, and I tell myself I can do that too.

  SnowAngel:

  have you talked to Doug since yr breakup?

  zoegirl:

  I’ve almost called him tons of times, but no.

  zoegirl:

  I check his FB status all the time, and I send evil thoughts toward Canyon, and I still miss him so much. but I have to move through it, right?

  SnowAngel:

  oh, sweetie. sounds so hard.

  SnowAngel:

  yes, you have to move thru it, and yes, you WILL move thru it.

  zoegirl:

  will I?

  SnowAngel:

  ooo, I want that girl’s boots.

  zoegirl:

  huh?

  SnowAngel:

  sorry! I’m on the quad and a girl just walked by wearing the most fabulous brown boots I’ve ever seen.

  SnowAngel:

  my brown boots are too big at the top and I have to wear thick socks to fill in the gap. this girl’s boots looked like they fit tightly around her calves.

  SnowAngel:

  it wld be awesome to have a pair of tall boots that actually FIT.

  zoegirl:

  well. good luck with that.

  zoegirl:

  also, yesterday Holly and I signed up to be volunteers at a Special Olympics competition that’s coming up, and after that we went to dinner together, and after that . . . we kind of kissed.

  SnowAngel:

  EX-FUCKING-SCUSE ME?

  SnowAngel:

  did you just say what I think you did? YOU AND HOLLY KISSED?!!!!

  zoegirl:

  kind of. yeah.

  SnowAngel:

  holy. fucking. shizz. nickels! Zoe!!!

  zoegirl:

  you’re making a big deal out of it. I don’t want you to make a big deal out of it.

  SnowAngel:

  oh, right, sure, cuz it’s noooo big deal at all. are you . . . are you two . . . are you two an item???

  zoegirl:

  ha. no.

  SnowAngel:

  but you like her.

  zoegirl:

  of course I like her. the kiss was more . . . why not, you know?

  SnowAngel:

  um, NO.

  zoegirl:

  the subject came up—girls with girls, guys with guys—and Holly said she was pretty much straight-up hetero, but that she did wonder what it would be like to kiss a girl. I thought about it and realized that I was curious too. or at least not uncurious.

  SnowAngel:

  whoa. so you just . . . kissed her? pucker up, sweetie, smoochie-smoochie?

  zoegirl:

  it was more of a 3-2-1 thing—not that we had an actual countdown. we just looked at each other, and agreed with our eyes, and did it.

  SnowAngel:

  fucking fucking shizz nickels. HEAD IS SPINNING. college girl experimentation! yah!

  SnowAngel:

  what was it like?

  zoegirl:

  nice. soft. weird and a little embarrassing. lots of things!

  SnowAngel:

  are you going to kiss her again?

  zoegirl:

  doubt it—but I’m proud of myself for going for it.

  zoegirl:

  for being NOT Zoe for that one moment.

  SnowAngel:

  I disagree. you were still being *you*. you decided to be a you who kissed a girl, that’s all, and I think it’s totally cool. you were yoloing, baby!

  zoegirl:

  hmm. maybe.

  SnowAngel:

  you know it’s true.

  zoegirl:

  what do you think Doug would say?

  SnowAngel:

  I think he’d say, “holy shizz nickels, my hot ex-girlfriend is so hot for kissing her hot new friend,” and then he’d want to shoot himself for letting you go.

  zoegirl:

  good—that’s what I wanted to hear!

  Fri, Oct 18, 5:07 PM P.D.T.

  mad maddie:

  and here it is, Friday night again.

  mad maddie:

  what is my little filly up to this evening?

  SnowAngel:

  *looks around* am I yr little filly?

  mad maddie:

  yes, duh, and what are you doing that makes it impossible to answer yr damn phone?

  SnowAngel:

  oh. Anna and I were having pre-party shots, and I didn’t wanna be rude.

  mad maddie:

  answering yr phone is rude but txting isn’t?

  SnowAngel:

  yup

  SnowAngel:

  also we’re at the Lambda Chi house now, only Anna’s gone off to find a bathroom, which means she cld be gone for hours. bathroom lines at these parties are wretched.

  mad maddie:

  you’re at a frat party? I thought you were gonna depledge.

  SnowAngel:

  I never said that

  SnowAngel:

  OH! BUT I HAVE A FUNNY AUTOCORRECT STORY TO TELL YOU!

  mad maddie:

  ok, tell

  SnowAngel:

  Reid wanted me to hang out with him tonight instead of going to the Lambda Chi mixer, and I was like, “um, no, parties r fun and there will prolly be dancing.”

  SnowAngel:

  plus I don’t want to lead him on.

  mad maddie:

  cldn’t he go to the party with you?

  SnowAngel:

  not exactly. BUT ANYWAY, I told him no, I can’t hang out tonight, but how about we meet for lunch?

  SnowAngel:

  (this convo happened earlier in the day, btw)

  mad maddie:

  ahhhh

  SnowAngel:

  he said, “sure, when?” and I said, “awesome, I’ll meet you at Shakes Alive in two boners.”

  mad maddie:

  two boners? hahahahaha. LOVE.

  SnowAngel:

  how did hours become boners???

  mad ma
ddie:

  I’m just glad yr not leading him on by talking about his big ol’ boner. wait—his bonerS, plural.

  SnowAngel:

  yadda yadda yadda

  SnowAngel:

  so that’s me, drinking and dancing the night away. you?

  mad maddie:

  gonna Skype with Ian in about a boner

  mad maddie:

  *hour—damn!

  SnowAngel:

  very funny

  mad maddie:

  I know, right?

  mad maddie:

  and after that . . . I dunno

  SnowAngel:

  you have to do something. it’s Friday night.

  mad maddie:

  yes, mom. thank you, mom.

  mad maddie:

  I guess Ian and I cld have phone sex and send each other naked pictures . . .

  SnowAngel:

  Madigan Kinnick!!!!

  mad maddie:

  kidding!

  mad maddie:

  I can’t wait for Thanksgiving, tho. I sure miss the guy.

  SnowAngel:

  aw, Mads

  mad maddie:

  and you and Zoe, obviously.

  SnowAngel:

  and we miss you. and Thanksgiving isn’t even that far off, praise Bob.

  SnowAngel:

  but tonight is Friday night. chat with Ian and then go be crazy!

  Sat, Oct 19, 1:00 PM P.D.T.

  mad maddie:

  Zo! that little dude is totes adorbs, as Angela wld say.

  zoegirl:

  from Instagram? that’s Fernando. he’s on the Special Olympics team I’m coaching.

  mad maddie:

  I know. *taps noggin* I read the caption, toots.

  mad maddie:

  what’s Fernando’s event? how old is he?

  zoegirl:

  ten, and he’s doing wheelchair rugby, and it’s INTENSE. these kids in their wheelchairs are fast!

  zoegirl:

  they wheel themselves super-fast across the court, and sometimes they ram into each other. sometimes their wheelchairs tip over.

  mad maddie:

  owwie. when their wheelchairs tip over, do they fall out?

  zoegirl:

  no, because they’re strapped in, so they have to sit there—well, lie there—until a coach or ref runs over and gets them upright.

  mad maddie:

  Jesus

  zoegirl:

  I know, but everyone cheers for the kid when he or she goes back into the game, because the point is NOT to feel sorry for them.

  zoegirl:

  talk about yolo, right?

  zoegirl:

  imagine being in a car accident and damaging your spine and never being able to walk again. that’s what happened to Fernando. but Mads, he is absolutely living life to the fullest. it’s so inspiring.

  mad maddie:

  cool. kinda makes me feel like there’s nothing I shld ever complain about.

  zoegirl:

  me too

  zoegirl:

  but for the record, Fernando’s not a saint or anything. another kid poured a slushie over his head, so he retaliated by pouring a slushie over that kid’s head.

  mad maddie:

  ha—that’s funny

  mad maddie:

  so the girl you have yr arm around. is that Holly?

  zoegirl:

  yup. she and I are going to a party tonight, and Gannon’s going to meet us there. it’ll be my first Big College Party.

  mad maddie:

  eek!

  zoegirl:

  I know you’re teasing me, but yes! eek! I suck at parties!

  mad maddie:

  ah, you’ll be fine as long as you keep in mind this bit of wisdom, courtesy of “The Onion”:

  mad maddie:

  “Be open to meeting people, as the friends you make freshman year are likely to be the friends you have throughout college, then fall out of touch with after graduation, then see every three to seven years after that.”

  zoegirl:

  k, great. thanks, Mads.

  mad maddie:

  u betcha.

  Sun, Oct 20, 9:02 AM E.D.T.

  zoegirl:

  omigod. so THAT’S what a college party is.

  zoegirl:

  hahahahahahaha!

  zoegirl:

  everyone got drunk, even me, and I kissed Holly again, and also Gannon, and yes I feel a little embarrassed thinking back on it all, but at the same time I don’t.

  zoegirl:

  I had fun. everyone had fun.

  zoegirl:

  and then—ha again!—the campus police showed up cuz apparently we were making too much noise!

  zoegirl:

  I, of course, had a panic attack and imagined myself getting kicked out of school, going to jail, having a criminal record, and having to explain, five years later at a job interview, why I checked “yes” on the application where it says, “Have you ever been convicted of a crime?”

  zoegirl:

  all of that ran through my head in, like, three seconds.

  zoegirl:

  but, long story short, Holly was her charming self and told the two police guys that we were playing “Would You Rather” and asked if they wanted to play too. they didn’t, but they didn’t arrest us, either. or write us up or whatever.

  zoegirl:

  everyone had to pour out their beer, and the police officers gave us a lecture about underage drinking, but that’s all.

  zoegirl:

  so I’ve officially gone to my first college party *and* I’ve officially gotten busted at my first college party.

  zoegirl:

  yes, I am just that cool.

  Sun, Oct 20, 11:10 AM E.D.T.

  SnowAngel:

  first of all, I cld not be prouder. you are such a badass!

  zoegirl:

  I know, right? and . . . hi!

  SnowAngel:

  and second of all, which WLD u rather?

  zoegirl:

  ???

  SnowAngel:

  kiss Holly or Gannon?

  SnowAngel:

  I can’t believe my little girl had a threesome!

  zoegirl:

  it was not a threesome. we were just goofing around.

  zoegirl:

  AND we said out loud that we were just goofing around and that none of us wanted it to be anything more than that.

  zoegirl:

  it was an experiment. do you have a problem with that?

  SnowAngel:

  I dunno. kissing a girl once I can write off as an experiment. kissing a girl TWICE, and we might be looking at Zoe gone wild.

  zoegirl:

  nope, not wild.

  zoegirl:

  well, maybe a little wild . . .

  SnowAngel:

  for real: do you like Holly as in *like* like her? you know I’m totally cool with it if you do.

  zoegirl:

  yes, Angela, I know. but I don’t.

  SnowAngel:

  cuz I wld love you no matter what. just sayin’.

  SnowAngel:

  did you use tongues?

  zoegirl:

  omg. Holly is awesome and so is Gannon, but we’re all just buds. the kissing thing . . . just happened.

  zoegirl:

  AND you’ve kissed random people at parties too, if I remember correctly.

  SnowAngel:

  a) RANDOM and b) guys, not “people.” Holly and Gannon aren’t random and HOLLY IS A GIRL.

  zoegirl:

  you’re so funny. would a girl kissing a girl really be a big deal at UGA? at Kenyon, everyone is way more relaxed about stuff like that.

  SnowAngel:

  huh

  zoegirl:

  yup. but the best thing about last night?

  zoegirl:

  I didn’t think about Doug once.

  Sun, Oct 20, 3:30 PM P.D.T.

  mad maddie:

  I just ate an entir
e bag of M&M’s. an entire ONE POUND bag of M&M’s.

  SnowAngel:

  that’s a lot of M&M’s

  SnowAngel:

  *I* just bought a pair of Aquatalia boots on Zappos, except not really cuz I am poor. but I want to. Zappos is SO ADDICTIVE!

  mad maddie:

  so are M&M’s. I feel kinda sick.

  SnowAngel:

  the boots I want are kinda like the boots I saw a girl wearing a few days ago. they’re tall and brown and gorgeous.

  mad maddie:

 

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