Where To From Here?

by Ursula Paul

  “Oh Julian… yes, yes, yes.”

  Passersby smiled at the sight of two not-so-young lovers locked in a loving embrace.

  “Let’s celebrate,” Julian finally whispered.

  “Yes, let’s,” Sinead echoed.

  With their packages of fish and chips and a bottle of red wine, excitedly they looked to their futures together.

  Chapter Ten

  Joe and Eddie were delighted for him, as he knew they would be. Joe appeared to be closing the door on his past sorrow. With Sinead now a part of his life, Julian could partly empathize with what Joe had suffered.

  But, Eddie! Both he and Joe worried about Eddie. Eddie had visibly changed – he had become quite thin and the persistent cough was eating into his strength.

  When Eddie had asked for help, Julian did not hesitate, especially as he was in between end of study and the beginning of his career in Law. For him, the process of solving the problem in Bourke was a challenge, but not an impossibility. For Eddie, it was an unsolvable problem, but one he could not let go. The final result was a relief for them both and opened the door to Eddie’s final months of ministry.

  Back in the city, Julian and Sinead spent much time together, not only to make up for their time of separation, but also to plan their immediate future. Julian knew his foreseeable future in the firm was assured; Sinead was still facing interviews. But she was hopeful of a positive result shortly.

  It was Sinead who made the final suggestion for their wedding.

  “Julian,” she spoke quietly. “I know you would go with anything I suggested.”

  “Well, most,” he laughed as he interrupted.

  “We have to be practical. Both of us want Joe and Eddie as celebrants. I had no family. But suddenly I’ve become part of a great one that includes Joe and Eddie. Let’s make a date – a date both Eddie and Joe are fine with. Then, with the help of your family – who have already offered – we plan the rest.”

  Both Joe and Eddie soon agreed on a date, not too far into the future. For the rest, Julian’s family very happily set about turning ideas into realities.

  Chapter Eleven

  The day of the wedding dawned. Sinead had been wisked away the night before to Tom and Meg’s home. Tom and Meg were to be the only attendants, although the invitees were many. These included both Joe’s and Eddie’s parents. Simon’s parents had also been invited but Mary, now a convalescent, and Gary had sent wishes but had had to decline.

  As Sinead followed Meg down the aisle to Pachelbel’s Canon in D, flashes of her past became real, with her grandfather’s, “Good lass,” and her grandmother’s, “Bless you, darlin’.”

  The liturgy that followed was one of trust and loving commitment. Both Joe and Eddie had celebrated many marriages, but for this one they were not only celebrants but lifelong friends. With love and trust, Julian and Sinead exchanged the vows they had prepared.

  After the ceremony, the reception in the grounds of Sean’s and Anne’s home provided the right atmosphere for all to mingle and enjoy the lavish food. A string ensemble provided music – from classical to jazz.

  The Martin grandchildren led any new-found friends into their secret haunts in the garden.

  The atmosphere oozed joy. Without making it obvious, Margie kept an eye on her son. Eddie appeared to have a new lease on life as he mingled with the guests, played a game with the children and joined in the celebrations.

  The sun had long gone and myriads of stars twinkled against the black backdrop when Eddie’s resilience began to fade. “Will have to sit down,” he whispered to Joe. Together they walked toward a garden seat close by. Soon they were joined by Julian.

  “How is it, mate?” he asked quietly.

  “Starting to slow down,” Eddie smiled back.

  “Si and I will never be able to thank you both enough for the ceremony you gave us today – something we will never forget.”

  “It was a day we will never forget too. Such a privilege to be part of it.”

  “How are you ‘travelling’?” Julian looked toward his friend again.

  “Wearing out a bit now,” Eddie responded. “But it has been a wonderful day. And, thank God, I’ve enjoyed every minute of it.”

  Seconds later he added, “Julian, I won’t be at the airport tomorrow. But you know I’ll be thinking of you and wishing you both ‘God speed.’”

  “Of course,” Julian answered softly.

  Julian looked toward Joe. “You’ll stay a bit longer?”

  “No, mate. I’m driving and I think Mum and Dad are ready to leave. But I’ll see you tomorrow.”

  “Great!” Julian replied. “Got an extra day or two?”

  “Yes, I was lucky. Do you remember Ray Finn – he was a couple of years behind us?”

  Both nodded as they visualized a tall, thin guy with blonde hair and a ready smile.

  “Ray has filled in for me this weekend,” Joe continued. “And he’s quite happy to remain until the end of the week. He’s in line for a parish of his own. At present he’s in a parish of three priests and the ‘big boss’ is one of the very few remaining who see themselves as completely running the show as they hire and fire, and parishioners are considered as well ‘down the ladder.’”

  “Still one or two servant of the servants around!” he added with a grin. Then continued, “So I will be at the airport tomorrow.”

  Eddie rose. “Okay, time for the scrum! Bless you both for your invaluable friendship and help through the years, for the ups and downs of our lives that we shared. And now,” he added as his arms slowly found the shoulders of his friends, “our prayerful scrum.” In the silence of their “prayerful scrum”, each knew that this would be the last scrum the three of them would share.

  Chapter Twelve

  Many of Julian and Sinead’s wedding guests travelled to Mascot to farewell them as they flew out on the first stage of their honeymoon in Europe and the British Isles. Eddie’s illness prevented him from joining the well-wishers but he insisted that Tony and Margie go along.

  Even after Julian and Sinead had boarded, most of the well-wishers remained until the Jumbo had disappeared into the horizon.

  On board, hand in hand, they silently watched the land below gradually disappear as they flew into a different life. Unknown to both, were the many happy years together they would share.

  “Well, we’re on our own,” whispered Sinead.

  “At last!” laughed Julian.

  “I am so lucky!” Sinead exclaimed quietly. “Now with the man I love so deeply. And taken in by his family.”

  “The luck is not only on your side,” replied Julian seriously. “I am now with the woman I love so deeply. And my family has gained a treasure in you. So, let’s say we’re quits.”

  She squeezed his hand in reply.

  At Singapore, a change in planes and they headed for Rome, where they were to hire a car.

  How much mileage and to which European countries, had not been planned. Yet for most of their final two weeks – in England and particularly Ireland – definite plans had evolved.

  Julian had travelled extensively, but Sinead had never crossed to Europe. To see the most of countries they passed through, they decided car, rather than train, would be the answer.

  They also decided not to bind themselves to time; hence no advance bookings.

  Rome – Julian had to admit as they began their journey – this city, with so many landmarks, its palaces, museums, Opera House, the Colosseum, Basilicas – had not changed.

  They attended Mass in St. Peter’s, milled with thousands in St. Peter’s Square for the Pope’s blessing. No, Julian admitted to himself, Rome had not changed. Then, had he changed?

  No, he accepted eventually, he had not changed. What had changed was the direction of his life.

  As they prepared to leave Rome and head north, Julian spoke suddenly, “You know, Si, we may not be back this way for some time. I’d like to detour south to Naples. What say you?”


  “I think heading south to go north would be fun!” she laughed.

  And south to Naples they drove! The day was bright, the water calm. As the gondolier gently paddled them along, they relaxed in each other’s arms.

  “No more back flips,” he promised as, eventually, they headed north, through orange groves, city lights and quiet villages. Days passed – towns and villages slipped past, slowly, lazily. Eventually they crossed into West Germany, via Switzerland. A day later, and a short drive close to the border, they entered France. Thence followed country roads with green paddocks and grape vines meandering (or was it they meandering!) on each side as they headed for the main road to Paris.

  Light rain was falling and daylight beginning to wane, as they drove into Paris. Julian had no trouble in finding and parking the car outside the small hotel, in which they had previously booked a room. In the dining room Julian’s fluent French soon netted them a tasty meal.

  Then, so tired, they fell to sleep in each other’s arms.

  “A full day coming up, darling,” Julian whispered to Sinead early the next morning.

  “Yes, guide,” she whispered back.

  And full, it certainly turned out to be. The first call – Notre Dame, where they attended Mass being celebrated in Spanish on one of the main middle altars. Then followed glimpses of the Sourbon and Moulin Rouge and a stop overlooking Paris from the heights of Sacre Coeur; lunch in an Eiffel Tower restaurant, followed by a cruise down the Seine. Back at the hotel, they decided, as they were leaving next morning, time should not be lost. With the Arc de Triumph in view, they wandered in and out of little back streets to Champs Elysee and then to Place de la Concorde.

  “Tired yet?” Julian asked.

  “No,” Sinead replied quietly. “Just a thought that has just struck me. My Uncle Sam was killed in France during the war. Not so many years ago the Gestapo walked these streets. I don’t know – something just grabbed me.”

  “So true,” Julian added. “And… the guillotine… not far from here… how cruel can members of the human race be at times…” He paused, then added quickly. “Enough of these morbid thoughts.”

  Hand in hand, they returned to their hotel.

  The next day – on the move again, this time on the Eurostar to London. Two days in London surfaced memories for both of the city they had known in very different circumstances. Julian had included a couple of restful days in their busy schedule. Heading south, the two days of rest were spent in the delightful village of Polperro. Hand in hand, they walked the quaint meandering alleyways, where cottages nestled in with small shops displaying varieties of wares, or watched the waters ebb and flow in the small bay.

  Revived after two restful days, they returned to London, to catch the flight to the final end of their holiday – Ireland.

  Julian had kept constant contact with Joe. Eddie was slowly fading, he continued to report, but was still very much attune to life. Joe’s reports always ended with the comment that Eddie’s doctor was amazed at how he was ‘holding on’, as though he were waiting for something.

  Chapter Thirteen

  On planning this trip both Julian and Sinead had planned everything together, that is, all but their time in Ireland.

  “Si, what about Ireland?” Julian had asked.

  Without pausing, Sinead had answered, “This is what I had thought…What do you think?”

  “Sounds great,” Julian had answered. He knew he would have planned it differently. But he was also aware that her planning had left the visit to Galway until the end.

  He had added, “Good planning, Si.”

  Arriving at Dublin, per Aer Lingus, another hired car was negotiated. Once again, they were on the moving stairway of life, but still aware of the beauty of the country – sometimes fierce, sometimes lush, sometimes gentle – as they passed through Kilkenney, Cork, Killarney, Dingle, Limerick. So much to see – and only a few days in which to do so! As they passed through the history, the entertainment – kissing the Blarney Stone, Irish dancing – the magnificence, the grandeur, the absolute beauty – the indescribable Dingle countryside in particular – Julian knew Sinead had returned to her roots and was delighted in it… Yet she was apprehensive of the final call.

  The drive from Limerick to Galway promised a joyful trip. The sun shone brightly, the blue of the sky stretched from horizon to horizon, sparsely dotted with fluffy, white clouds. But Julian sensed the sun was not shining for Sinead. Abruptly he pulled to the side of the road and turned off the ignition. Surprised, Sinead turned to him.

  “There is something wrong.” He spoke at once. “Do you want to talk about it?” he asked softly, as he took her hand.

  “I don’t know, Julian,” she whispered as tears began to flow.

  “You know we don’t have to go through Galway – we can go back. You don’t have to do this, Si.”

  “I know,” she sobbed. “I know. But I must.”

  “What is hurting you so?” he asked gently.

  “I don’t know. I really don’t know,” she answered honestly.

  “We’ll stop at the next village,” he declared. “We’ll think about it.”

  At the next village they found a pub open for business and ordered tea and scones. Julian said nothing. He knew it would need be Sinead’s decision where they would go from here. He smiled at her over their cups of steaming tea.

  Eventually, she whispered, “I’m frightened, Julian. I’m frightened of returning. I have never really closed the door on leaving after Mum died. Now I must face it – I must!”

  “Yes. But you don’t have to do it right now,” he assured her.

  “If I don’t do it now, I’ll never do it,” she answered.

  “Then we’ll do it, Si. We’ll do it together. Okay?” He looked for her answer.

  “Yes, Julian.” She held his hand tightly. “Let’s go,” she added softly.

  The remainder of the miles to Galway was spent in silence, with Julian casting constant sideway glances towards his wife.

  They left the car at the boarding house and slowly walked across the stone bridge, under the ancient archway and looked out on to the still blue waters of the Bay.

  Julian stopped and turned her to face him. “How are you?” he asked quietly.

  “Okay. Let’s go.”

  They soon passed a long row of terraced houses standing abruptly on their left, with Galway Bay shimmering on their right.

  She stopped abruptly. “Is this it?” Julian asked as he looked up to a pale grey building.

  “No. Two up,” she whispered.

  It was part of a long row of terraced houses. Yet it was different. Of all the houses in this terraced row, this one stood out. Not only was it the only one painted bright pink, but the flower boxes were full of bright colour. Although the paint was inclined to peel in a few places, the dwelling appeared to be well kept.

  “Someone loves it too,” she whispered as, once again, her tears fell.

  “Sure,” was Julian’s only answer.

  They walked the few yards to front it.

  “Yes.” Her whisper was barely audible. Memories flooded back. “Someone still cares for it.”

  The years melted away. Once again she was scooting along, following her brother as he raced up and down the street. As the green front door opened, once again she heard the lilting voice, “Come on in, you two. Time for your baths. Tea will be waiting.” She almost felt again the warm hug as she passed inside.

  “Would you like to go inside?” Julian’s question brought her back to the present. He continued, “I’m sure if we tell them who you are, they will be happy to show you around.”

  “No, Julian. I’m so pleased to see someone loves our old home and is looking after it. But inside is theirs now. I have – and always will have – memories of how it was. That’s just what I want – nothing else.”

  Minutes passed as she continued to gaze at this quaint little pink terrace house. Memories flooded. When she turned, Julian knew
before she spoke that resolution was imminent .

  “It’s okay Julian,” she whispered. “Perhaps we’ll return another day. Now…”

  They returned under the old arc. Walking in silence, they turned into the main thoroughfare. Sinead’s memories crowded out present events, until she became aware of the changed environment.

  “Thanks, Julian!”

  In reply he squeezed the hand he held.

  “I need a Baileys!” she announced suddenly. Then added, “Or should I say, I’d like a Baileys, please!”

  Sinead is back, Julian thought happily.

  “Madam, your wish is my command,” he laughed as they found seats in the first pub they passed.

  Over her Baileys and his choice of a Guinness, memories flooded. No longer memories hidden, but memories – wonderful memories – shared at last with someone – with someone she loved and trusted.

  The next day they drove to the cemetery. As she stood at the foot of her grandparents’ grave, “God bless you both,” she whispered. “May you both now enjoy the reward you both so richly deserve.”

  Julian stood beside her, holding her hand, knowing she needed to hold these memories of years, so long gone, yet so close and so meaningful to her as they could never be to anyone else.

  As they began the drive to Dublin the next day, Julian asked, “Would you like to revisit yesterday in any way?”

  “Not today. Perhaps another day in another year. But not today. Thank you,” she added as she kissed him fondly.

  Chapter Fourteen

  “Nearly home!” The sun was beginning to rise as the aircraft cruised, due to land in Sydney in the next three hours.

  “Nearly home!” she echoed. “What a wonderful time it has been.”

  “Sure has,” he agreed. “Will be hard to settle into work!”

  Minutes passed in silence. She’s dozing, he thought. But, when he looked over, he noticed not only was she wide awake but she was smiling.