How To Fall In Love

by Bella Jewel

  Autumn laughs and Wrath mutters, “No one was givin’ you a choice.”

  “Pipe down, biker,” I say. “You still owe me.”

  He raises a brow. “Owe you? For fuckin’ what?”

  “One, for flipping me the bird,” I say, stepping closer to him. “Two, for stealing my best friend and scaring the life out of me.” I get up to his chest. “And three, well shit, there is no three. I will drop three because you have put a smile on her face I’ve never seen, so I can forgive you for some of your bad behavior.”

  He laughs and wraps an arm around Autumn. “Whatever you say, babe.”

  I lift my hand and I flip him the bird.

  I just know we’ll be good friends.

  CHAPTER TWENTY-SEVEN

  I don’t tell Reign that night.

  That would be because I pass out cold when the sun goes down, and there will be no moving me from my bed.

  I decide to go to work the next morning, and I try to keep my stomach sealed for long enough to get me through the first part of the day without being sick. The doctor told me salty crackers and water in the morning, so I managed to nibble some down before heading in.

  Reign called a meeting first thing, which is the absolute worst thing that could have happened. Being that I’m stuck in a room with men and women who are talking far too loudly and they’re all eating pastries and delicious things that now make me feel as though I’m going to lose my stomach at any second.

  That’s why when the plate is passed my way and the smell fills my nose, I find myself leaping out of my chair, hand pressed to my mouth.

  “Tia,” Reign says, turning to me from his position at the head of the table. “Are you okay?”

  I shake my head, running from the room. I barely make it out of the office space when I drop to my knees and throw up. Shame fills my body as I lose the water I drank only an hour ago. Tears tumble down my face as I desperately try to stop the vomit rising up in my throat.

  “Shit, Tia.” Reign is by my side, his hand rubbing my back.

  “Get me the cleaner,” he barks to someone.

  I sob loudly, pressing my hand to my mouth.

  “You need to get a second opinion. You’re fuckin’ sick and I’m not going to sit back and watch it,” Reign says, helping me to my feet. “I’m taking you right now.”

  “No,” I protest, my voice shaky. “Reign, no.”

  “Tia, you’re sick. You’re going to pass out if you keep throwing up the way you are. You’re going to the hospital.”

  “I said no, Reign,” I cry, trying to tug my hand from his as he leads me down the hall.

  “Argue as much as you like, hate me if you will, but I’m not letting you continue on like this, because I care about you.”

  “Reign—”

  “Don’t argue with me.”

  “Reign—” I try again.

  “Tia, for fuck’s sake, you’re going to the hospital.”

  “I’m pregnant,” I screech, losing it. “You goddamned stubborn asshole. I’m fucking pregnant.”

  His hand drops from mine so quickly it’s like he’s been burned. He stops in front of me, not facing me. I can’t see his eyes, but I can see how stiff his shoulders just got. I stop breathing for the few minutes it takes him to turn and stare at me.

  “What did you say?”

  “I’m pregnant,” I whisper.

  I can see the emotion flashing across his face, and I can almost hear the wheels in his mind turning.

  “Mine?”

  My shoulders straighten. “Of course it’s yours, Jesus, Reign.”

  He just stands there, staring at me, clearly in shock. “Are you sure?”

  “Am I sure I’m pregnant, or am I sure it’s yours?”

  “Both,” he rasps.

  I grind my teeth together. “Yes, I’m sure.”

  “I thought you were on protection, or I would have fuckin’ used a condom.”

  “I was, but it ran out and with everything that was going on, I didn’t realize my time was up.”

  He reaches up, running a hand through his hair. “Shit, fuck.”

  Not exactly the reaction I wanted, but it could be worse.

  “I need,” he begins, taking a deep breath, “I need time. Go home, Tia. I can’t . . . I can’t do this right now.”

  That burns.

  Nodding my head, knowing it’s best not to push, I turn and walk slowly down the hall. My vision blurs as I climb into the car he organized for me, and the entire way home I manage to hold my tears in. Confusion and fear fills my veins as I get out and numbly walk to my front door, my heart breaking.

  What if he doesn’t want our baby?

  ~*~*~*~

  I’m curled up on the couch, arms around my knees, head dropped between them. I’ve stopped sobbing, but my heart continues to feel empty and broken. Reign hasn’t called; it’s been three hours. I guess that’s all I need to know. My mind twists in confusion as I try to think about my next steps. I don’t even know if there are steps to take.

  Maybe my best option would be to leave.

  A pounding at my door has my head lifting from their warm spot on my knees. I stare at my front entrance, knowing it’s not Reign. He doesn’t knock, he just enters. With a sigh, I shove to my feet and walk over, opening the door to reveal a brooding, angry Selena. It takes me a moment to process that she’s standing at my door.

  “What the hell?” I mutter.

  “You little whore!” she screeches, her face scrunched with rage. “I knew you wanted him back, but going to this length to get him is low, even for you.”

  What is she talking about?

  “I don’t know what you’re talking about,” I say, crossing my arms.

  “He told me you’re pregnant!” she yells. “He told me because he’s disgusted and had nowhere else to turn.”

  My heart feels as though it’s been ripped from my chest at her words. Reign told her? Instead of coming to me, he went to her? Pain rips through body as heartbreak takes over. Betrayal is an ugly emotion, and it hurts so damned much.

  “Leave my house,” I rasp out, trying to keep my control.

  “I won’t warn you again: you will leave this town, leave Reign and never come back. Sort that thing out,” she growls, pointing to my stomach. “And fucking get out of my town.”

  “Your town? You have some serious balls, lady,” I laugh brokenly. “And if you truly thought Reign wanted you and there was a chance, you wouldn’t be here threatening me.”

  “Reign and I have been together a long time. He loves me.”

  “That’s because he’s blinded.”

  She steps forward, shoving a finger into my chest. “I won’t ask you again: leave this town.”

  I shove her chest. “I said, fucking no!”

  Her hand raises and she punches me. Pain radiates through my cheek as I stumble backwards, tripping on the doorframe and landing on my ass with a thump.

  “You’ve already tried to ruin my relationship with him by telling him what you heard, now you’re trying to play his emotions by putting a baby in the mix.”

  “I didn’t ask for this baby,” I scream. “Now leave my damned house. You’re a filthy, pathetic, lying whore. He will find out what you did to his baby, and he will see that he’s wasted his time believing you’re a good woman.”

  “He will never find out what I did to that baby, because if I see you near him again I’ll make it end.”

  I hear the sounds of boots crunching, and I see the exact moment Slutena spins around and is faced with Spike, Cade, and Muff. Her eyes widen and she places a hand to her heart, clearly shocked. Spike’s eyes flicker down to me, and the blood sliding down my face from the split under my eye, then he looks back up to her with rage in his gaze.

  “You fuckin’ put your hands on this girl?” he barks.

  Slutena backs up. “Ah, I . . . I don’t know . . .”

  “Did you fuckin’ put your hands to her?” he roars.

  She
squeaks and starts to cry.

  “You think we didn’t hear what you just said?” Muff says, grinning, but it isn’t a nice grin—it’s more a feral baring of his teeth.

  “I don’t know who you are, but this is a private conversation.”

  They all laugh. I push myself to my feet. Pain shoots through my spine. I take the door handle and hold it, keeping myself upright. My other hand protectively cradles my stomach. Cade steps past Spike and Muff, and his arm goes around my waist. “You hangin’ in there?”

  I nod, swallowing. “I think . . . I hurt my back.”

  “We’ll get you some help, yeah?”

  I nod again and turn my eyes back to Slutena who is staring at Spike and Muff, trying, no doubt, to find a way around them.

  “It ain’t a private conversation when you’re layin’ your hands on Reign’s woman.”

  “She isn’t Reign’s woman, I am,” she screeches.

  Spike laughs. “He been puttin’ his cock in you, sweetheart?”

  The way he says sweetheart has me shuddering, because it isn’t nice.

  “No, but that’s because of her!”

  “Well,” Muff says, his face hard as he steps forward, “he’s been puttin’ it in her, over and over, because he fuckin’ wants her. You’re a pain in the ass who needs to take a fuckin’ hint and leave.”

  “She’s a liar,” she cries, crossing her arms. “Now she’s pregnant with his child to trap him. You know nothing.”

  Cade looks down at me. “That true?”

  “Which part?” I whisper.

  “I know you’re not a liar, Tia. About the baby?”

  I nod. “But I’m not trapping him, I was trying to avoid all this. I don’t want it in my life.”

  He looks sympathetically at me. “You definitely need to see a doctor then, you had a hard fall.”

  Spike takes a step towards Slutena, his big hands clenched. “What I know,” he barks, “is that you’re a money-hungry, expensive, skinny piece of ass that clearly can’t accept she’s lost her man. If you didn’t want to lose him, you could have kept your goddamned legs closed. Your time is up; he don’t belong to you anymore.”

  “He loves me,” she snaps.

  “No.” Spike laughs. “He thinks he loves you. He thinks he loves you because he’s holdin’ on to the fact that you were pregnant with his kid. We all know you took matters into your own hands and killed that baby. He don’t know that because you’re a fuckin’ liar, but he’ll find out. I’ll make sure of it.”

  Slutena turns to me, and bellows, “You’re telling the world I had an abortion. You fucking bitch!”

  Cade’s arm tightens around my waist and he shoots daggers at her.

  “Listen to me, lady,” Spike roars, causing her to flinch and turn back around. “You so much as come near this girl again, I’ll put you six-feet under. You’re a waste of precious air and you’re never going to get your claws into Reign again.”

  “You c-c-can’t threaten me,” she rasps. “That’s illegal.”

  Spike laughs. “Look at me, do you think I fuckin’ care?”

  She blinks a few times at him, before turning and rushing down the driveway.

  “I meant what I said,” Spike yells after her. “Don’t come back.”

  She gets in her car and speeds off, tires squealing on the wet road. Spike turns to me and his eyes go to my cheek. “You good?”

  I nod. “I need to see Reign.”

  “You’re angry, Tia,” Muff says. “Probably not a good idea.”

  “I. Need. To. See. Him,” I grind out.

  “Don’t bother arguing with her,” Cade says. “It won’t stop her.”

  “Fine,” Spike mutters. “But you’re goin’ to the hospital first. Then we’ll go over and show him what we got.”

  “What we got?” I ask, confused.

  Spike reaches into his pocket and pulls out his iPhone, pressing a button. I hear the conversation with Selena and him playing back, even the moment she admits to her lies and the abortion. I have everything I want in that recording, yet hearing it only makes my heart ache.

  “No,” I say, hanging my head.

  “Babe, we have the fuckin’ evidence,” he says, shaking his head in confusion.

  “Yeah, we do,” I whisper. “But you have to understand that I can’t let him come back to me just because of that. I don’t need him being with me out of pity. He needs to make this choice, Spike. He needs to do it without that evidence. If he chooses not to believe me and to believe her, then I’d rather he stays there. I’m not going to force his choice.”

  “Shit, Tia,” Cade mutters. “You’re too good.”

  “I just need this to be real? Can you understand that?”

  I give them all a pleading look. With a sigh, Spike nods and the others follow. “Let’s get you to the hospital.”

  I nod weakly and follow them out.

  I hope I’ve made the right choice.

  ~*~*~*~

  REIGN

  I pace the office, my fists tight and my heart feeling like someone has ripped it out and crushed it. Pregnant. She’s pregnant. The very thought has my head spinning. I don’t know how I feel about it, fuck, I don’t know how I feel about anything. I’m in a fucked up place, and the entire situation is causing a world of fuckin’ hurt for everyone.

  “Reign?”

  I hear Selena’s soft voice and turn to see her standing at the door, giving me a gentle expression.

  “It ain’t a good time,” I mutter.

  She walks in, closing the door behind her. “I heard what happened, I was in the office next door when Tiani got sick.”

  Fucking perfect.

  “Then you’ll know it ain’t a fuckin’ good time.”

  Her eyes grow soft and I want so fucking much to believe it’s genuine, but the seed of doubt has been planted now. She walks over, placing a hand on my arm. “I know how this must feel for you, after everything you’ve been through. I’m so sorry, Reign.”

  I nod stiffly. “Thanks.”

  “After we lost our baby, I saw how you suffered. Now this is being put in front of you and I have no doubt you’re confused. You have every right to be. If you need to talk, I’m here for you. I’ll help you through this. Tiani, too.”

  I lift my head and stare at her. “Thanks,” I say again.

  “Listen, you need some fresh air. You look like you’re about to pass out. Come for a walk to the coffee shop down the road. We’ll talk about it, see what we can work out.”

  I’m in a desperate place, and she’s right, I need to get out. She’s not exactly the person I want to be with right now, because I can’t get Tia out of my head. I can’t stop seeing her hurt expression when I sent her home. But I need a break and I know I can’t get rid of Selena easily. Not to mention, I need to talk to her about this for a final time.

  I know a choice has to be made.

  ~*~*~*~

  REIGN

  “How are you feeling about everything?” Selena asks, sipping her coffee.

  I stare down at mine, knowing it’s going cold.

  “How the hell do you think I’m feelin’, this wasn’t meant to happen.”

  “Do you think she did it on purpose?”

  I snap my head up. “No.”

  “How can you be sure?”

  I glare at her. “Because I know Tia.”

  She stares sympathetically at me. “How is this going to affect us, Reign?”

  “How can I answer that for you?” I snap. “I don’t even know how it’s going to affect me.”

  She gives me a sad look. Shit.

  “Sorry,” I mutter.

  “I know we’ve been going backwards and forwards over this for weeks, but we can’t keep sitting on this fence. You need to make a choice Reign. I love you, but I can’t keep feeling like this.”

  I sigh, because I know she’s fuckin’ right. I have to make a damned choice. I lift my head and say in a clipped tone, “Why did you do it?”
<
br />   She looks confused.

  “Why did you fuck him?”

  Her cheeks grow flushed. “We were in a bad place and I was lonely and depressed.”

  “So you felt it was okay to fuck another man?”

  “No, Reign,” she cries. “I told you it was a mistake. One I am living with every damned day.”

  “Tell me why you love me, Selena.”

  She looks puzzled. “What?”

  “Tell me.”

  “Because you’re...kind, and handsome...”

  “That’s it?”

  She begins looking flustered. “I just do, Reign. There doesn’t need to be a reason.”

  But there does. If I asked Tia that, she would tell me it’s because I make her smile, it’s because I make her laugh, it’s because we have a connection that goes so much deeper than just friendship. I look up at the woman over from me and the only thing I can think about is the one who isn’t with me. I miss her laugh, her smile, her sassy nature.

  “If you could name your pussy, what would you call it?”

  Selena’s eyes widen and she looks around in horror. “Reign, what’s wrong with you? Who asks something like that?”

  “Answer the question,” I bark.

  “I will not!” she gasps. “You’re asking me to behave like a silly child and I won’t.”

  “It’s not silly, it’s funny,” I growl. “It’s called having fun.”

  “No,” she bites out. “It’s called acting like a teenager.”

  “If I come back, can I eat pizza in bed?”

  Her eyes widen. “Reign, my sheets cost me over five hundred dollars each. You know the answer to that.”

  “Yeah,” I snort. “You’re right, I do know the answer. Fuck, I’ve known the answer all along; I just couldn’t see it. You know what, I think this has all been a mistake. We’re not right for each other, Selena. We haven’t been for a long time. I thought I was in love with you, but you know what? I was in love with the idea of you. I was in love with the past. The man I was cared about you, but he’s gone now.”

  “You’re only saying this because of her,” she cries. “Think about this.”

  “No,” I say, standing. “I’m saying it for me. It’s the first fuckin’ thing I’ve done for me in a long, long time.”

  “Reign,” she yells, rushing after me. “You can’t make a decision based on such a simple, stupid question.”