The Future Memoir of Ann Jones

by Alex Bailey

  “Things started going downhill. Bobby got into a sort of…funk. I don’t know. He started spending more and more time in the basement. He bought a desk at the second-hand store and put it down there. He’d hardly show his face upstairs, ‘cept when I called him for dinner.

  “He’d come upstairs, eat, and not say a word. At first, I’d ask him if he’d had any luck finding a job. But he would just give me dirty looks and grumble about how bad of a cook I was. Nothing seemed to please him. I wondered what Bobby was doing at his desk all the time, but when I went down to the basement, he’d yell at me and chase me away.

  “I didn’t know what to do. So, one day I snuck down the stairs very quietly and peeked around the corner to see him just reading the newspaper. I didn’t know what to think about it. Didn’t even know we subscribed!

  “But then I sort of lost my balance. And well, stumbled into the room where his desk was, and he got real mad. I mean, I’d never seen Bobby act so harsh in all the time I knew him. I didn’t know what to think. But I knew one thing, get outa there quick, so I ran back up the stairs.

  “I was terrible lonely those days. It got so bad toward the end, I was even thinking about divorcing him. But when I brought up getting a divorce to Bobby, he flew into another rage and I was scared. He made all kinds of threats and said something about my daddy’s store and did I want that to happen to my nice house. He was just not himself.

  “The next day, he had calmed down, and at dinner I brought up the idea of him seeing a doctor. Well, that made him madder than a hornet on a chicken and waffle sandwich covered in honey. He told me to keep out of his business and mind my own. And that if I had the money to spend on a doctor that I should take that money and get me some cooking lessons. Well, that hurt my feelins’ real bad. But I tried not to hold that against him. I knew he was just sick in the head and without help, he would get worse and worse. I wasn’t sure when, but I was pretty sure he would end up hurting me one day. So, I decided to leave him. He could have the house and he could cook his own meals, too.

  “I leased an apartment the next day. And moved some clothes and personal things in. Bobby never even noticed what I was doing, because he was just in the basement all the time. I went back to tell him goodbye and that’s when it happened. He smacked me hard against my cheek. I had a hand print on my face for the longest time. I was smart with makeup though. I covered it well.

  And then, that night, Bobby was smoking a cigarette at his desk and fell asleep reading the newspaper. I guess it was a terrible boring article. The cigarette caught the newspaper on fire and burned the house down, with Bobby still sitting at his desk. At least, that’s what the fire marshal could gather from the rubble that was left. I guess you could say he died doing what he loved best.

  “I couldn’t take living in that town anymore and didn’t have any kin or friends there, except the ones at the store where I worked, so I moved up here to Burrburgh and got a job at the Okey Dokey Corral and met Freda. She was so kind to invite me to this warm and loving group, where I’ve been ever since.”

  Freda was the first to speak, “Thank you Bubbles, that was fine, real fine. But now I have to give Ann our final rule.” Freda rose from her seat.

  Ann was curious about how all these women found themselves in this little group in which each woman had a story of a lost husband. She had previously thought that the name, The Dead Husbands Club, described this group, but now Ann wondered if, The Murdered Husbands Club, was more fitting.

  “Final rule,” Freda bore her gaze into Ann, “you must never remarry. This is extremely important and must be obeyed. And to the rest of you,” Freda turned toward Bubbles, “this is your reminder.”

  “Oh, I’m not marrying Pete. We’re just dating! Honest!” Bubbles said defensively.

  Ann was furious! Who did this Freda think she was by making all these random rules! It was one thing to make rules about the stupid knitting club, a club that had nothing to do with knitting, but this had gone too far. This was a person’s life she was trying to rule. Ann balled her fists and demanded, “What gives you the…”

  Freda turned slowly back to Ann. All heads bowed immediately, except Ann’s.

  Ann wondered why these women were allowing Freda to rule their lives. Someone needed to stand up to her.

  Freda spoke slowly, enunciating every word, “Don’t. Don’t question my authority in this.”

  Ann felt a jolt in her side. Gloria’s elbow warned her to keep silent. But she just couldn’t, it was all too much for her to bear. “You don’t own Bubbles. Or any of us!”

  “The final rule, Ann. Make sure you keep it. Or else. You’ve been warned.” She turned and picked up the creepy painting from the coffee table and set it on the floor against the side wall. “You are dismissed until next week.”

  Ann fumed as she followed the women up the stairs.

  Chapter 25

  Ann was scraping paint off what used to be a bar she’d found at the junkyard with a utility knife in her soon-to-be bakery. She was furious with Ben and needed to take her mind off her anger, so she thought about Freda’s rule regarding marriage restriction. She wondered if Gloria was taking this seriously, and if that was the reason she couldn’t marry Daniel. It made sense, and yet, it made no sense. Not to Ann. It was a terrible joke, but she couldn’t believe an intelligent and strong woman like Gloria could fall for some idiotic rules from a woman running a knitting club, which, of course, was bogus.

  “Speak of the devil!” Ann said, as Gloria walked in. She was glad her friend was there, since she needed a break. She pulled two crates together and sat on one and offered the other to Gloria.

  “Who were you speaking to Ann? There’s no one in here but you.” Gloria accepted the crate and sat down.

  “I was just thinking about last week’s knitting club meeting,” Ann fumed.

  “We shouldn’t speak of such things, you know the rules,” Gloria whispered.

  Gloria’s response was fuel for the fire of Ann’s anger and she lashed out at her friend, “Are you saying you believe those cockamamie rules!”

  Gloria cackled. “What the bloody hell is cockamamie?”

  Even Ann had to admit no one ever said cockamamie anymore and snickered at her own blather.

  “You Americans,” Gloria said, shaking her head, “and you say we Brits talk funny!”

  “I have to admit that was kind of archaic. But you do talk funny! What the hell is blimey? Is that even in the dictionary?”

  “Okay, okay, Ann. I didn’t come here to get beat up for speaking proper English,” Gloria said with a sly grin.

  Ann gave her friend a hug. “I really am glad to see you.”

  “I know what happened. Daniel phoned me.” Gloria’s sympathetic face showed she was there to help.

  “He called you? How’d Daniel know?” Ann knew as soon as she’d said it. Of course Ben would have called Daniel.

  Gloria shrugged. “Ben phoned him, and then Daniel phoned me. They thought you could use a friend right about now.”

  Ann didn’t know what to think or feel. “Well, they were right, I do need a friend, and I’m glad you’re here.”

  “So, Ben finally fired you, eh?” Gloria said matter-of-factly.

  “What do you mean…finally!” Ann demanded. “I thought you were here for support, not to be on Ben’s side.”

  “I’m on your side, Ann. I really am. I just happen to agree with Ben’s decision. You’ve been exhausted working at the dealership, baking biscuits for Daniel’s restaurant, and working here trying to make a go of it. Things were slipping. You’ve become a little bit on the edge.”

  “A little bit on the edge? What does that mean? Anyway, I’ve been fine. I’m working and enjoying all of it. I don’t need Ben telling me I’m overdoing it. I don’t need him making that decision for me. I can make my own decisions, thank you very much.”

  “Did you really tell him you thought Dona was at the root of his firing you?” Gloria asked.
<
br />   Ann flung a paint chip from her putty knife onto the floor. “I did. That woman hates me! He didn’t fire me until she found out about us. So, what does that tell you?”

  “It tells me you’re overworked and your mind is not clear. Ben does not take orders from his sister. He is a grown man who makes his own decisions and this one was his own.”

  Ann scowled. “How do you know? She talked him into giving me half-days off on Wednesdays so I could bake cookies for that damn knitting group.”

  “Daniel said so. And I for one, believe him.”

  “Oh, you do, do you?” Of course she would side with Daniel.

  “I do. Now, back to you my dear Ann, can you honestly say you haven’t been a bit…testy lately?”

  There was the altercation last week with Freda. But that was justified. She’d lost her temper with Ben at work a few times lately. But that was also justified. She also had squabbled with the woman who was in front of her in line at the bank who’d given her an eerie look. But that was definitely justified! “Yes, I can honestly say I have not been a bit…testy lately!”

  Gloria cocked her head sideways and gave Ann a look that said, “Come on now.”

  When Ann burst into tears, Gloria threw an arm around her shoulder. “It’s okay, Ann, no one is expecting you to be Super Woman. You need to concentrate on getting your bakery in order. Do you know when I started my real estate business I was so scared it would be a flop, that I took a position in a dress shop? I couldn’t do both; I had to let one go. I’m terribly glad I made the proper decision. Of course, it was tragic when I no longer was given the employee discount and had to pay full price for the lovely dresses I purchased.”

  Ann snuffed up her tears and calmed herself enough to smile.

  Gloria removed her arm and dug into her purse and handed Ann a tissue.

  “Thanks.” She focused on the word, employee, and that led her thoughts to Helga. “Oh no! Helga!” Ann sniffed again and shoved the tissue to her nose. “She was counting on me to be there and learn that job so she could—”

  “Calm down, Ann. Helga gave her employment termination notice.”

  “What do you mean?”

  “When Helga heard you’d been fired, she came to your defence and told Benjamin he could find a replacement for both of you. She gave him one month, and then she’s off to open a crystal ball shop or some such nonsense.” Gloria waved her hand in the air as if dismissing Helga’s idea.

  Ann Grinned ear-to-ear. “Palm and tarot card reading shop.”

  “You find this amusing?” Gloria seemed indignant.

  Ann’s whole demeanor changed, she sat up straight and wiped her eyes. “I do. You have no idea how happy this makes me. It’s worth Ben’s firing me to see her pursue her own dream.”

  Gloria picked up a utility knife, and said, “You know, you don’t have to do this alone. We’re all here to help. You simply need to ask. In fact, if I may make a suggestion, we’re going to host a bakery creation party the Saturday next. I will send out the invites and Ben and Daniel can bring the power tools and we’ll have a blast!”

  Ann huffed. “It’s just that I’ve never done anything like this. It’s so overwhelming. I have to order supplies, and equipment, and paint the walls, and get this counter fixed up. And I thought if customers wanted to eat in the bakery, then I’d set up some little tables with outlets and Wi-Fi. Since I’m going to have pet snacks, it only makes sense to have an area set up for them, but I don’t want them mingling with the guests who may have allergies and such, so I was thinking they need a separate space. And—” Ann was talking so fast, she was almost hyper-ventilating.

  “Come here for a moment.” Gloria led Ann to a large box in the middle of the room and sat Ann down. “Look around. See how much you’ve done already? You’ve come a long way, lady.”

  Ann looked around but all she could see was what was left undone. Her face showed it.

  “I know you have a way to go, but working yourself to death isn’t going to help the cause. Who’ll open the bakery if you’re deceased?”

  The edges of her mouth moved ever so slightly in the upward position. Gloria was just trying to help, but Ann knew what she needed most. And what she needed most was a bit of perspective. On the bakery. On her firing. On her rapidly-gaining momentum then coming to a halt in her relationship with Ben. On her involvement with the knitting club and its idiotic rules. Yes, she knew exactly what she needed to do. “I need a break, Gloria.”

  “I’m thrilled you’ve finally discovered that for yourself! Does this mean you’re no longer furious with Ben over the firing?”

  “I don’t know. That’s why I need a break. I need to get away. Far away. And clear my head. I need Alex. She’s been my friend since childhood and we’ve been through everything together. She knows me better than anyone in the world. I need her sound advice. And I need to hug my kids. I’ve thought about going home for a while. Now, I’m really going to do it.”

  Gloria smiled broadly. “That’s a splendid idea! I’m quite certain that a few days won’t make a difference in the opening of the bakery. You should go. And enjoy yourself. Get that perspective you mentioned.”

  “A few days? It’ll take a few days just to adjust to the West Coast time difference! I’m going for a couple of weeks.” Ann stood and felt a huge relief in deciding to make the trip home.

  Gloria’s smile twisted into a look of horror. “Ann, you mustn’t…You know you can’t—”

  “I mustn’t what?”

  “You mustn’t miss Knitting Club!”

  Ann took a deep breath as she paced around the room. “What? You’re joking, right?”

  “This is serious. You simply can’t go for more than a week. If you time it right and leave for the airport directly from the knitting club, then return the next Wednesday, you can get your week in. But be sure the flight is early in case of delay. You cannot miss the meeting.” Gloria seemed visibly upset, as she held her hand to her forehead.

  “Are you telling me you’re seriously going to let that tyrant direct your life?” Ann threw her head back in laughter. “Well, I’m not. I’m not going to book a flight out and fly all night and get there half asleep. I’ll make my flight for the next morning, and I’m booking it for two weeks!”

  Gloria took a few shallow breaths in rapid succession and held her hands to Ann’s shoulders, “Look, I know you don’t really understand, but trust me, I’m your friend. I’m trying to help you. This is life and death, we’re speaking of.”

  It hit Ann that Gloria believed everything Freda said and Gloria was seriously worried. She also realized something else, “So, this is why you won’t marry Daniel. Because of that stupid rule!”

  Gloria dropped her hands and hung her head as she said, “Indeed.”

  It was Ann’s turn to grab Gloria’s shoulders as she tried talking some sense into her, “Gloria! This is your life we’re talking about. You can’t let some crazy old bitty tell you what you can and can’t do. This is just nuts! If you love Daniel, you can marry him, and if you want children, you can do that too. You both are miserable over this for no reason.”

  Gloria somberly shook her head, her shoulders drooped, as she moved closer to the door, “It’s no use, Ann. You simply don’t understand. It’s our penance. But I do very much hope you realize before it’s too late that you must not miss Knitting Club. I can’t say anymore. Shouldn’t even have been talking about this.”

  Ann was confused; she had no idea what penance Gloria was talking about. And Gloria was right about one thing, Ann certainly did not understand.

  “I have to be on my way. I’ll see you tomorrow at the meeting.” Gloria marched out the door with her head hung low, leaving Ann in a state of total confusion.

  Chapter 26

  With a ticket home in her purse, Ann practically skipped her way down the sidewalk to Freda’s house with Honey and her usual baked goods in tow. She was excited to be going home in the morning and would have plenty of
time to talk things over with the best listener she’d ever known, Alex. The thought of seeing her best friend made her heart sing.

  Since the living room was empty, it seemed Ralph and Jasmine had not yet arrived. Ann left Ralph’s usual bag of goodies on the coffee table. He’ll see it when he gets here. She made her way to the basement. When she set out the platters, Gloria snatched a cookie and sat down, while Amanda practically mobbed her.

  “Sorry, Ann, I’m famished. Got caught up at the bank. Can’t be late for the knitting club, so I didn’t have dinner. Do you mind if I take an extra?” Amanda asked politely.

  “By all means. Take as many as you like.” Ann glanced over at the sofa where Gloria had one hand rubbing her forehead, her other hand was picking at the edges of her cookie and crumbling it onto a napkin.

  Bubbles and Ele were deep in conversation about Bubbles’ latest date with her boss. “And then, he whisked me an hour away to the airport, where we sat and watched the planes flying over our heads. It was so much fun, snuggling up with Hottie. That’s what I call him,” Bubbles squealed in delight.

  Ele giggled. “Sounds so romantic.”

  “Oh darlin’, it really was,” Bubbles said in a girlish tone. She and Ele grabbed cookies for themselves, and Bubbles took a biscuit for Tiny.

  Ann took her seat next to Gloria on the sofa and smiled. Gloria returned it with a half-hearted effort.

  Ann announced to her friend, “I got the tickets for my trip,” just as Dona sat in her usual space on the sofa next to Ann. Lady AdoraBelle jumped up onto her owner’s lap.

  Dona asked snootily, “Oh? And where might you be going?”