The Reluctant Daddy

by Helen Conrad

  He nodded warily. “Sure. But what will I say to them?”

  She thought for a moment. “Jimmy has been watching World War II movies lately. He’s obsessed with airplanes. He’ll probably think you look like a pilot. He keeps hoping to find one.” She smiled. “And Megan is really into Christmas. This is the first year she’s been fully aware of what’s going on and she thinks it’s pretty nifty.”

  “Okay,” he said, smiling back at her. “Let’s do it.”

  Glenna pulled Jimmy away from the tree and presented him. He was wearing navy blue slacks and a white shirt with a green sweater over it, and his hair was slicked down. He stood like a cadet and stared at Lee with bright, intelligent eyes. “I saw you at the store,” he declared.

  Lee nodded and looked at Glenna to see if she’d caught that, but she was busy getting Megan ready to leave the toys and come meet him.

  “You sure did,” he said.

  Jimmy looked up at him, his eyes huge, and he seemed to be taking in every detail. “Do you have an airplane at your house?” he asked him solemnly.

  “No, I don’t,” Lee said. “Do you like airplanes?”

  Jimmy nodded emphatically.

  Lee grinned at him. “Then I’m sorry to disappoint you.”

  The boy shrugged. “That’s okay.”

  They smiled at each other for a moment, neither having anything else to say, and then they were saved by Glenna’s arrival.

  “And this is Megan,” she said, proudly presenting her little cherub, who was decked out in what looked like a smaller version of her mother’s dress, burgundy red with white lace trim. Her little legs were encased in white tights, her feet in patent leather shoes, and her hair was arranged in soft brown ringlets. Lee found her absolutely adorable.

  “Hi,” Megan said, seeming not at all shy. “I got Christmas presents.”

  “I’m glad,” he said.

  She looked deeply into his eyes as though she was sure she would find something she’d lost in there. “Do you got Christmas presents at your house?” she asked.

  He hesitated. “I’m waiting for Santa Claus,” he told her.

  She nodded as though she understood that very well. “Jimmy got puppies,” she told him next, her little round face deadly serious. “They’re bisible.”

  He blinked. “They’re what?”

  “They’re invisible,” Glenna translated, leaning close to his ear.

  “Oh, you can’t see them?” he said to Megan.

  “Uh-uh.” She shook her head sadly, her lower lip protruding.

  He smiled, enchanted by her and wondering if this was what her mother had been like at this age. “Maybe you should get Jimmy to put clothes on the invisible puppies. Then you could see where they were, at any rate.”

  Megan frowned at him, not sure she understood what he was talking about but ready to give him the benefit of a far greater experience. “Okay,” she said doubtfully.

  He laughed and she waved before going back to the tree with her brother. Looking down, Lee met Glenna’s gaze and he saw the question there. He smiled at her, nodding, but she didn’t look satisfied. They made their way through the doorway, not bothering to glance at the people still watching them, and went toward the main hallway.

  “Your children are beautiful,” he told her softly as they walked.

  “Did you like them?” Her face revealed that she was ridiculously eager for his opinion.

  He smiled at her. He knew what it was like to have kids you were crazy about. “Of course. They’re terrific kids.”

  He could see the anxious look still in her eyes. The questions weren’t going away. She didn’t understand. She thought he didn’t like children, and nothing could be further from the truth. He thought of his own two, Mark and Jenny, and could hardly remember what they’d been like at this age. Different, though. Not like these kids. Time went so quickly.

  “Where’s their father right now?” he asked. “Is he coming to see them for Christmas?”

  “Didn’t you get the point when I told you about Alan?” she asked with deceptive lightness. “He doesn’t want to be a father. It would somehow stifle his creativity or something. Inhibit his life-style is probably more like it. He’d just as soon pretend they don’t exist.”

  They reached the end of one hallway and started down another, passing rooms of revelers as they went. But they were virtually alone in the hall, and heading toward a dead end.

  “Doesn’t he send you any support money or anything?” Lee asked her.

  “I don’t want his money,” she said shortly. “I’m lucky. I have my parents behind me and I don’t have to take it.”

  That made him wince. Support money was one of the few ways he still had contact with his own. “But your children have to have a father.”

  She nodded. “I know that. Believe me, I’ve been to hell and back over that problem. But right now, their father is a shadowy figure they’ve only heard about now and then.” She glanced at him, wondering what his point was. “I never say anything bad about him. But I don’t go out of my way to tell them the truth, either.”

  “You should remarry,” he said shortly, frowning and pulling her hand in tightly against his body, as though he were protecting her somehow. “You should find someone who wants children.”

  She nodded. “Good idea,” she said mockingly. “Where do you suppose I would find such a man? Ads in the newspaper, do you think?”

  He pulled her around to face him, staring down at her full lips, her feathery eyebrows, her delicate nose. “I don’t dislike children, Glenna,” he insisted gruffly.

  “Don’t you?” What else could she think?

  “No. I—I can’t really explain it.” He shook his head, frustrated. How could he explain that, for all the love his children had brought him, the pain when they had turned from him had been more than he ever wanted to face again? “You’ll just have to take my word for it.”

  He released her and they continued their walk. Liza yelled from down the hall and they waved at her, but she went on and didn’t wait for them to arrive, and they were both relieved. Right now, they wanted to be alone.

  “Are you going to get a dog for them?” he asked abruptly.

  She shook her head, making a face, realizing right away he was talking about her children.

  “No. The last dog we had, Ginger, was such a love, and everybody cried for days when she died. We can’t go through that again.”

  He gave her an incredulous look. “You mean to tell me you’re not going to risk loving another dog just because you loved that one so much?”

  She sighed, looking toward the lake as they passed a bay window. “I don’t know. Not if we can avoid it.”

  “But avoiding the sorrow means you’re also avoiding all the good things about dogs.”

  “Oh, sure,” she said, exasperated with him. “We’ll miss all that digging up of the flower beds and messing on the carpets and howling all night. Is that the stuff you mean?”

  “Not exactly.” He chuckled and looked away, his eyes going dreamy. “I was thinking more along the lines of the way a dog is always there for you. Dogs give unconditional love, and sometimes a kid needs a little of that. Every kid has a time when his heart is broken by something adults just don’t understand. The dog does, though.”

  He ended somewhat awkwardly, and Glenna watched him, touched. She was sure he was speaking from personal experience, and she loved that. It was rare you found a man who could remember what it was like to be a child.

  They stood at the glass door and looked out at the winter lake. The lights from the lodge gleamed across the ice. He pulled her a little closer, enjoying the sense of her beside him, enjoying her fresh scent, her warmth.

  A wistful feeling came over him, and suddenly he realized he was sick o
f going into towns and becoming the bad guy. He liked people. He liked the people of this town. It wasn’t in his nature to want to make trouble. He was doing his job the best way he knew how. It was a job that had to be done.

  Looking back into the room, he still saw animosity in many eyes, but he knew it wasn’t really personal. It didn’t mean they didn’t like him. They didn’t like what he was doing to their town, and he couldn’t say he blamed them.

  As he watched, a group of men came through the doorway, looking belligerent and heading his way. Lee stiffened, recognizing trouble when he saw it. “Why don’t you go on back to the tree and see about your kids?” he said to Glenna, not taking his attention from the newcomers.

  Glenna turned and saw what was going on, and her hand tightened on his arm. “Not on your life,” she whispered. “I’m staying right here with you.”

  A line of annoyance appeared between his brows. “Glenna, get going,” he ordered, pulling away from her. “This is my fight.”

  She didn’t say another word, but she didn’t leave, either. Standing right by his side, she lifted her chin and stared with as much defiance as she could muster, recognizing Frank Sims and George Bond in the group of six or seven men. They stopped a few feet away from Lee and glared at him.

  Frank stepped forward as the spokesman. “We want to have a word with you, Mr. Nielsen. You want to come outside with us?”

  Lee’s eyes flickered from one man to the next and a slight smile curved his lips. “Not particularly.” He waved a hand toward the rest of the room. “This is a party.”

  Frank’s mouth twisted in a sneer. “That’s why we’d better take our business outside.”

  Lee shrugged lazily, seeming at ease with the situation. “If you want to talk, let’s talk. We don’t have to go outside.”

  He wasn’t taking it as casually as it looked. He knew the dangers here. He knew exactly why they wanted to take him out. These boys had that redneck look in their eyes. Most of them might be white collar during the day, but right now, with a few drinks under their belts, they were ready to rumble. And he didn’t feel like getting beat up tonight.

  They weren’t bad guys, really. He knew their type. They were just a little intoxicated on anger and the holiday spirit. If he did go outside and they did beat him up, they’d feel real badly about it in the morning.

  “Look,” he said, though he knew they were beyond logic. “I know you’re mad. I know you’re worried. But the investigation isn’t over. Nothing’s settled. All we’ve got so far are preliminary assumptions with indications toward arson. Why don’t we wait for the final results before you start building a gallows for me?”

  Frank didn’t seem to hear a word he said. He took a step forward, his face red, and pointed an accusing finger at Lee. “You’re paid off by the insurance company, aren’t you?” he claimed.

  “You’re getting a kickback, aren’t you?” asserted another man in the group.

  Lee shook his head, staying calm. “I get a set sum no matter what conclusion I come back with. I negotiate my fee ahead of time. It has nothing to do with the results.”

  Frank’s sneer grew more pronounced. “Do you expect us to believe that?”

  Lee sighed. Reasoning wasn’t working. He was going to be facing two options here. He could either go outside with them and let them beat him up—seven to one were odds even he didn’t have a chance with—or he could turn his back and walk away and let them make things unpleasant in other ways.

  “Look,” he said, trying one last time. “I don’t care what you believe. I’m here to have a good time at a party, not to talk shop. You want to go into this more fully, come by the station and see me tomorrow.”

  He turned his back on them and started to walk away, aware that Glenna was walking beside him. He hadn’t gone ten steps before there was a scuffling noise behind him, but he waited until he got to the door before looking back. Johnny Kelsey and Joe Santori had come forward to hold the men back and try to settle them down. Lee hesitated, ready to go back and help them, but Glenna tugged at his arm, and Johnny called after him at the same time.

  “Go on. Go dance or something,” he urged. “We’ll get these clowns straightened out.”

  “You’ll just get them riled up again,” Glenna said when Lee didn’t react to that right away. “Come on. Let’s go. My dad and Joe can handle them.”

  “Go on,” Joe called as well, grinning after him.

  But Lee couldn’t do that. He couldn’t leave this mess behind for someone else to clean up, and he went back. As he approached, the men looked surprised, and a few even had the grace to look sheepish.

  “Listen, fellas,” he told them simply, standing in the midst of them. “I know you’re mad. In your shoes, I’d be mad, too. But I have to do my job. If you want to come by the station tomorrow and discuss how we came to the conclusions we came to, I’d like to see you there. I’d be happy to go over all the evidence with you. No problem.” He looked from face to face. “Do we have a deal?”

  They grumbled. They conversed among themselves. They glared. But in the end, they agreed to meet him the next day, and as they started straggling out of the room, Lee turned and thanked Johnny and Joe for their help.

  “Don’t thank us,” Johnny told him, laughing. “You got out of that one by yourself. Take a bow. You’re the expert.”

  Lee turned to find Glenna and walked slowly toward her. She watched him come, shaking her head with worried tenderness. “Okay, Mr. Hero,” she whispered, slipping her hand onto his arm again. “What next? Do you leap buildings in a single bound?”

  “Not usually,” he told her, grinning, feeling as much relief as anyone. “But I am faster than a speeding bullet when I have to be.” He let his gaze trail over her, taking in her silky skin and the way the lace looked against the suggestion of cleavage at the neckline. He wanted to keep reminding himself that she’d lied to him, but there didn’t seem to be any use in it. He was hooked, regardless. “What now, lovely lady?”

  “The dancing is starting in the next room,” she said, her eyes lighting up at the thought.

  “Do you want to dance with me?” he asked, raising one eyebrow. “After what happened the other day at the coffee bar?”

  “Nothing happened at the coffee bar,” she stated firmly, eyes flashing.

  He laughed. “Well, okay then. If you didn’t notice anything, God knows what I might be able to get away with.”

  Laughing as well, she gave him a mock slap on the arm and her cheeks colored, making her even prettier than she’d been before.

  They walked into the ballroom just as the band struck up a beautiful melody. “Can you waltz?” she asked him, her eyes bright in the light of the shimmering chandelier.

  “I can try,” he responded, smiling at her eagerness.

  They spun around the floor, taking big, sweeping steps and laughing as they careened from one side of the room to the other, narrowly missing other couples. She was getting drunk on this—he could sense it. She was high on the heady feeling of being with him, as if they were alone on top of a mountain. Lee knew because he felt the same way.

  It was just like it had been the other night, only better.

  “Look!” someone called out. “Look outside. It’s starting to snow.”

  He glanced down into her eyes. Neither one of them said a word, but they both smiled and started toward the door. In a few minutes they were outside in the cold, but not feeling a thing except the delicate tingle of snowflakes settling on their faces.

  “Hey,” he noted as she reached out her hands to catch a flurry of flakes. “Doesn’t it ruin velvet to get it wet?”

  She nodded, not caring, not thinking, only feeling the joy of the moment here with him. “But it won’t get wet,” she promised, dancing out into the yard. “I won’t hold still long enough for anythin
g to melt!”

  Laughing, she spun, holding out her arms, and he watched for a moment, then caught hold of her and pulled her close, looking down into her beautiful face and feeling as though something hot and hard were growing in his chest.

  It was his heart. He knew it. He hadn’t felt this way about a woman in almost twenty years. And it felt damn good. In fact, if he didn’t watch out, he might find it was addictive.

  She was laughing up at him, snowflakes clustered like diamonds in her dusky hair, and he wanted to possess her in every way a man could, body and soul.

  “You look like a rose,” he murmured, nuzzling her face. “You look like a snow rose.”

  “A snow rose,” she repeated, closing her eyes and taking in the sensation of his touch. “Does that mean I’m liable to melt away when the sun comes out?”

  “Not if you kiss me,” he whispered, his mouth close to her ear. “If we kiss, you turn into a human and stay with me forever.”

  Her heart stopped, then beat again as fast as rain on a metal roof. He was only talking, and she knew it. But still...

  She turned her face to him, he caught her mouth with his and they kissed. The world around them seemed to grow still. Snowflakes drifted down and landed on their faces. The music from the lodge seemed very far away. Somewhere in the distance there was an animal cry that sounded like the howl of a wolf. And still the kiss went on, so long, so slow and sensuous that when Lee finally drew away, Glenna needed his help to keep her feet under her.

  “Ohh,” she said huskily, her eyes blurring. “That was delicious.”

  He laughed softly, holding her close, swaying with her in the snow. “It was delicious,” he agreed. “But the question is, was it magic?”

  She nodded, tilting back her head to look at him, her eyes huge in the light from the decorations covering the house. “Magic,” she mouthed back to him dreamily, and he laughed softly and traced her lips with the back of his finger.

  “Then I guess you’re mine forever,” he said, so softly she could barely hear his words.