No Turning Back, A Breaking the Rules Novel

by A. m Madden

  Without beating around the bush, I said, “Look. Riana told me about your little chat. All’s good. No hard feelings.”

  “I regret what I said to her that night. But I won’t apologize for caring about her.”

  “I’m not getting into this with you again. You care for her. I love her. We’re on the same side, Cooper. You just need to tone it down a bit. She may be carrying your babies, but your meddling is still out of line.”

  “I can’t do that.” It wasn’t the condensation on the bottle that forced my grip to tighten. My response was to turn on my heel and head back toward the house. “Can you let me finish?”

  “Why?” I asked tersely. “When Ree and I got back together, you claimed you just wanted her to be happy. Then we get engaged, and you pulled the same shit. I respect my fiancée’s relationship with you, and I’ll be civil for Ree’s sake. But let’s get one thing straight… I don’t owe you a damn thing.”

  “Fair enough. I’ll back off… provided you answer one question.”

  I had to stop myself from telling him to fuck off, and I instead raised a palm. “Ask.”

  “Do you bribe young athletes to sign with you?”

  My jaw hit the black paver stones beneath my feet. “What the fuck are you talking about?”

  “Chris Walker. Does that name ring a bell?”

  “Yeah. Sophomore. Tight end, huge prospect. Why?”

  “I’m his adviser at Miami U.” He studied my face for a reaction.

  “So?”

  “He’s dangerously close to being kicked off the team unless he brings his GPA up. Cocky arrogant prick. Thinks he’s invincible because of his talent. He’s taking courses during the summer to make up for the credits he lost last semester. When I called him to check in this past Monday, he not so brightly admitted he had it all planned out. All he had to do was sign with you, and that would be his ticket to the pros.”

  I began to lose my patience. “What is the point to this?”

  “I did a little research on campus. Your name came up a few times… something along the lines that you paid students to pose as athletes who were failing. I’m not one to form an opinion on speculation, and since it’s all I have right now, I decided to ask you directly.”

  What the fuck? “Who told you that?”

  “Other students I counsel.” This had Doug written all over it. Motherfucker. I’d underestimated the lengths he’d go through to ruin me. There was no proof, but that meant nothing. If enough heard this fucking rumor, it would take years to recover. The only way I could clear my name would be to sue him for defamation. Wes and I had hired a lawyer when we left Morton, but I lacked confidence he could take on Doug… and that bastard knew that I couldn’t compete with the barracuda he’d have representing him. So I was either fucked in the business or fucked financially. And Doug knew that.

  I guess I owed Cooper for telling me. Who knew when I’d get wind of it otherwise? Planting that toxic seed in the ears of undergraduates would cause just enough damage without it imploding into the real sports world. It would also serve as a warning that it could get so much worse.

  “That’s absolutely not true.”

  “If you say it’s not true, then I believe you,” Cooper said a bit disingenuously. “I just thought you needed to know.” The suspicion in his eyes was undeniable. So when he stretched out his hand as a peace offering, I accepted it with a grain of salt.

  “What are you guys doing out here?” Riana said from the front door, her eyes zeroing in on our clasped hands. Cooper remained silent, clearly deferring the response to me.

  I needed to tell her… and I knew this would kill her.

  Chapter Twenty-Six

  Riana

  August

  For the last fifteen minutes, I’d been lying on my left side, staring at the smiling woman holding a baby. Shiny auburn hair, perfect white teeth, pale-green dress that had her eyes popping like jewels. And then there was that gorgeous little boy in her arms with a hint of his mother’s hair color dusting the top of his head and an adorable toothless smile. The photographer needed to be commended for snapping his camera at the precise moment that captured an ideal shot. Picture perfect.

  The last nine months prepared you to fall in love for a lifetime.

  Although that inspirational poster was a bit presumptuous, implying every woman in that room would have a lifetime to love their baby, it wasn’t the real reason emotions overwhelmed me. Its only fault was serving as a catalyst in its flawless display of health and vitality, one that prompted all I’d bottled up to come rushing out.

  “Don’t judge me,” I murmured at the poster while wiping away relentless tears. Who could blame her, though? While she held her gorgeous baby, one she would love forever, I needed to magically lower my blood pressure to keep the two I carried safe for someone else to love forever.

  Piece of cake, right?

  Squeezing my eyes shut to kill the visual her image represented, when I opened them, I quickly shifted my gaze to stare at the poster beside her, detailing stages of a pregnancy. My hand instinctually spread over my belly. It was my job to protect them, and today I was failing.

  After Dr. White took the first reading, I had pathetically rambled that it’d been a stressful time for me. That claim had come minutes after she’d noticed my ring, and she had offered her heartfelt congratulations. A bit of a contradiction. But she’d simply smiled sympathetically before explaining high blood pressure was very common during pregnancy, especially while carrying twins.

  I wasn’t buying it… and if I wasn’t, then how would Ryder?

  I had spent the last fourteen days internally fuming, because I needed to keep my anger in check and secret from him. If Ryder knew the extent of my hatred for his ex-boss, he would use it as leverage to continue to keep things from me. In fact, I wondered if I would’ve even known this was happening at all had I not interrupted his chat with Cooper on July Fourth.

  Cooper had tried to downplay their discussion as an opportunity to make amends. But based on the guilty expression written all over Ryder’s face, I knew better. Still, I’d played along, hoping upon hope Ryder would be honest with me. I’d waited it out through the fireworks Marco had arranged, and the ice-cream sundae bar that had been wheeled out.

  Later that night, once we were back in our bed, Ryder reluctantly told me what Cooper had discovered and that he suspected it was Doug. First thing I felt was relief he didn’t hide it from me… next came fury.

  How could that despicable person sleep soundly each night? After all Ryder had done for him, gratitude was nowhere to be found. Instead, he wielded his vindictiveness like a sword in battle.

  Ryder was understandably livid, but I could see defeat in him before he even began the fight. I did all I could to support him. Ricky, knowing the situation through Cooper, called Ryder and recommended that he hire his lawyer. In his opinion, Ryder needed to protect himself sooner than later. Where there was smoke, there was fire, and a few rumors could easily spread like a forest fire if ignored.

  Joseph Hammil was the lead counsel on Ricky’s legal team at RMR. Apparently, Joseph was the best in Florida. Ricky had hired him because of his accolades. Those same accolades came at a price.

  Ricky assured Ryder he wouldn’t be charged the same fees as the outside world. Still, hating to be indebted to them, it took a few days for us to convince Ryder that was the only way. Clearing his name had to take precedence over the financial burden that he worried about. If his reputation was on the line, he wouldn’t have a business to salvage to begin with.

  Once Ryder finally agreed, Cooper arranged for him to meet with him. According to Joseph, we needed proof of defamation… witnesses willing to sign an affidavit or testify, if need be. That was the problem. Approaching the student who threw out Ryder’s name would put Cooper in a problematic situation. And even if we put that aside, the chance a rising star would put themselves in such a compromising position before their careers even began were sl
im. Meanwhile, the more time that went by, the more one little rumor had the opportunity to fester like a virus.

  I hated that he had to deal with this. He’d worked so damn hard to get where he was. And now a disgusting lie threatened it all. It was stressful enough to build a company, but to do so while fighting a smear campaign was reprehensible.

  Ryder had admitted that my knowing the truth removed a weight that would’ve otherwise contributed to his angst. What he didn’t know was that, although easy to be supportive and encouraging, it was hard as hell to hide my own angst from him. One whiff of the stress I carried would instigate his argument as to why he kept things from me. And until an hour ago, I’d thought my biggest challenge was acting the part. Turned out that was nothing compared to my newest reality.

  Dr. White came back into the exam room with a smile. Seeing my tears, she put a hand on my arm. “Don’t worry about this, Riana.”

  “It’s hard not to,” I said, feeling my heart rate spike at seeing her refasten the cuff to my arm for a second reading. With each squeeze of the bulb, the cuff inflated and compressed my upper arm. “Still high?” I asked, watching the pucker on her forehead deepening after each pump.

  She forced a smile. “Yes, but again, it’s not uncommon. Your body is working double time to grow these babies. With some relaxation and bedrest—”

  “Bedrest?” I rudely cut her off. “For how long?”

  “Let’s see how you do until your next visit.”

  “But I have a birthday surprise planned for my fiancé.” I had convinced Ryder to let me handle our next getaway this month. “After much research, I booked us for a weekend excursion through the Everglades… boat tour, light hiking.” Based on her expression, I knew what she’d say.

  “Sounds exciting, but in this heat it’s probably best you put that on hold.” Dr. White placed a comforting hand on my arm. “Maybe you can have a nice romantic night at home and give him a rain check?”

  “Yeah, okay,” I responded despondently.

  “Stick to the couch, your bed, a comfortable deck chair maybe? No exercise.” There went my daily walks. “And I’d also like you to follow a low-sodium diet. That should help as well.”

  “What about all the meat I’m eating?” I filled her in last month on my diet when I showed a healthy gain on the scale.

  “Keep trying to introduce vegetables or lean meats… see how you do.”

  My face scrunched up in disgust. “Just thinking of a chicken breast and salad makes me nauseous.”

  She smiled and nodded. “I get it. I couldn’t even look at a raw egg. Well, keep away from salt for now, rest up, and let’s see how you do next month.”

  “Okay.”

  “Now let’s get those anxious men in here to discuss gender.”

  Knowing they’d decided to have a gender-reveal party, I merely nodded and left it up to them to inform Dr. White of the change in plans.

  I dragged in a deep breath before unlocking the door. The sound of the key had Kayla barking on the other side. “Shh, girl. Calm down,” I whispered, bending to give her a proper greeting. So much for slipping in unnoticed… not like that would change the situation. The entire drive back from the doctor’s office was spent with Ricky and Cooper scolding me that it wasn’t my fault. They also went on and on about holding off on the reveal party. That I should be there, and they could easily keep the babies’ gender a secret for another month.

  I reminded them my blood pressure may not improve by then, and that they should have the reveal as planned. I could also take part via video call. Sensing my low spirits, they conceded allowing me to slip into my own thoughts, where I mentally prepared my speech to Ryder.

  Downplaying the prognosis wouldn’t do a damn thing. In his head, he’d be convinced stress had caused my blood pressure to spike. There wouldn’t be a doctor on earth who could assure him it was a common occurrence when carrying twins. I didn’t have a chance in hell to accomplish that.

  “Here goes nothing,” I said to Kayla, who had already retreated to her favorite spot near the couch.

  From the foyer, I heard Ryder’s voice filtering down the hall. Dropping my bag on the foyer table, with each step I dragged in a deep, fortifying breath. At his door, I leaned against the jamb for a beat, staring at him doing his thing.

  “Let’s dangle the carrot… I’m sure I can get him at least ten percent more than the last offer.” He went silent, flipping through page after page of the contract before him. Whoever he spoke to seemed to consume his attention, until I softly knocked on the doorframe and his head lifted with a smile.

  Mouthing a hi before I could leave him to his task, he motioned me closer while saying, “Wes… I’ll call you right back.”

  Once I reached his chair, he twisted enough to pull me down on his lap. “I didn’t mean to interrupt.”

  “You’re never an interruption.” He kissed me softly. “So? Boys, girls, one of each? What are they having?”

  “We don’t know.” The smile fell.

  “What happened? I thought today was the day.”

  “It was. The doctor was able to see them clearly. It’s just that the guys decided to have a gender reveal.”

  “A what?”

  I laughed at his ignorance. “A gender reveal. It’s usually a party when they either have a cake baked with the inside tinted blue or pink… some people hit a piñata to reveal the proper color. It’s meant to tell friends and family what they’re having in a party setting.”

  “That sounds ridiculous,” he said around a grin. “When is this gender reveal?”

  “Saturday.” The grin predictably spread. He knew we had plans for his birthday celebration, although he didn’t know what was on the agenda. I now would effectively kill his mirth with my next statement. “Yeah, we can’t go… but we also can’t go away.”

  Sure enough, his smile faltered. “What’s wrong?”

  “Nothing major. My blood pressure is a touch high, and Dr. White would like me to take it easy until my next appointment.”

  “Okay. We can do your thing next month and go back to Sanibel for my birthday. Massages and relaxing on the beach should do the trick.” He kissed the side of my neck, moving his way up to my ear. “Having sex in that tub you love so much would help too.”

  “That sounds wonderful.” The tone of my voice mismatched my positive words, tipping him off there was more. Straightening his head until we came nose to nose, he searched my expression. “Don’t panic… it’s nothing. Dr. White just feels it’s a good idea to be on bedrest until my next appointment.”

  The hand resting on my hip tightened. “Bedrest? Bedrest does not sound like nothing major, Riana.” I hated the trepidation written all over his face.

  “It’s very common when carrying twins. I promise it’s just a precaution, and I’ll be fine.”

  His thighs flexed beneath me, indicating that he needed to stand. No sooner had I lifted off his lap than he began pacing the room. “Ryder, please relax.”

  “Relax? I’m supposed to believe it’s a coincidence that two weeks after we find out my career is on the verge of imploding your blood pressure spikes?”

  “Yes, it is a coincidence. It’s nothing to worry about.”

  He threw me a deadpanned expression. “Please do not tell me it’s nothing to worry about. You’re a strong, independent woman… and that’s just one of the many reasons why I love you. But you’re not invincible, baby.”

  “I promise you that I’ll be fine.”

  “Bullshit!” I flinched from the outburst and hated myself for it. Remorse had him reaching for me in a hurried hug. “I’m sorry.”

  “No, I’m sorry.”

  “Why are you sorry?”

  “You have enough to deal with without adding me to the mix. For the next four weeks, I’m confined to either the bed or the couch. Everything will fall on you—Kayla, meals, shopping—and I hate that it’s because of me. So while you’re racked with fear that something will go wro
ng, I’m racked with guilt for putting you through this.”

  He remained silent and then gripped my face between his hands. “You have nothing to feel guilty about. We’ll find a dog walker, have the cleaning staff come twice a week, hire a goddamn cook. I don’t care about any of that. All I care about is you. So, beginning now, you relax and stop worrying about me and anything else you’ve worried about. Just like you said, it’ll be fine. Everything will be fine.” His eyes drilled into mine. “Okay?”

  I nodded, knowing that was his way of warning me our “being truthful no matter what pact” was effectively on hold. There was nothing I could do to change that. Just like there was nothing more I could say or do that would convince him otherwise. I knew he would react just as he had, and all I could do was keep calm while keeping him calm.

  Chapter Twenty-Seven

  Ryder

  The first thing I did after Riana informed me of her doctor’s instructions for bedrest was to hire a dog walker. There was a teenage boy a few floors down who always loved seeing Kayla in the elevator or foyer. I paid him a visit and offered a hundred bucks a week if he’d walk her during the day. That would help me not have to worry about her when I was entrenched in work. He eagerly agreed, and we decided on a twice-a-day schedule running Monday to Friday.

  Since Riana already had a housekeeper who came by once a week to clean the apartment, although I hated it was paid for by Cooper and Ricky, I gave Harriett a call and asked her to come twice a week going forward. The added day was now on me, and that appeased me a bit.

  It took a few hours to successfully end Riana’s concerns that came from being put on bedrest. She slept peacefully that night and every night, which was more than I could say for myself.

  Granted, lack of sleep was a trend for me lately… but since Wednesday it wasn’t just work that had caused the unrest.