Divided

by Kaesey Stobaugh

  "Please! Please, don't leave! She's not here to turn us in. I wouldn't do that to you, Nate!"

  "Why not? It makes sense!"

  "No, it doesn't! Why would I do that? Give me one good reason why I would bring her here to turn you in!" Her voice is now flamed too as she hangs onto my leg.

  "Let go, Willa!" I demand, looking back at the girl.

  "No! I'm not letting you go!

  I wonder briefly if she means more than just physically releasing my leg but I don't give it another thought. I know I can get free if I’m alright with kicking her off me. Unfortunately, I’m not alright with hurting her in any way. One of my weaknesses, I guess.

  "Nathan, I’m on your side here. You know that. You and I are a team! You have to start trusting me. I've never given you a reason not to trust me!" She glares up at me, "Why don't you have a little bit of faith in me and come down so I can explain! I’ve earned this much."

  I stare at her for a long moment before I glance back to the stranger still lingering behind Willa. I know she’s right about the trust thing. Willa really hasn’t ever done anything that sent me red flags. She is nothing but trust worthy. Maybe I should show her that I do trust her. I just wish it was only my life on the line here...and not my family's too.

  I inhale and hold my breath for a long time. Willa gives my leg that she’s still clinging to a hard shake.

  "Nathan, breathe." She says more softly, "I promise, it’s okay. You’re not in danger and neither is your family. Do you hear me? Your family is not in danger.”

  Her words shoot through me like a bullet. Willa is still looking out for me, I can see that now. I take another deep breath and let it out slowly. I stare at the unexpected visitor while speaking through my teeth. "Okay." That's all I can manage to get out. Willa's face is hopeful so I continue, "I'll...I don't know...do whatever you want me to do."

  "Well, I want you to come down for starters."

  I slowly slide down the ladder, not taking my eyes off the intruder. I tower over Willa but she doesn't seem tense or uncomfortable.

  “Okay, I probably owe you an apology. I didn't have a way to tell you before it happened and I know I shouldn't have told anyone about you...” She trails off. My focus is suddenly on her. She continues, “But I was going crazy. I had to talk to someone. I really trust her. I would never tell her about you if I thought there was even the tiniest possibility of her telling somebody. But I know that what we’re doing is not just my secret to tell...and I'm sorry. But I know she'll keep our secret safe...that is...” She stops and pulls away from my stare. Now looking at her feet, I barely hear her mumble, “That is if you still want to see me after this.”

  I watch her face for a long moment before glancing up at the still motionless intruder who is too far away to hear our conversation. Then I look back down to Willa who’s still looking at her feet, waiting for my reply.

  "I believe you." I say softly. "And of course I still want to see you. Sneaking off is kind of the highlight of my week." I try to sound humorous. Maybe I can make her smile again. She looks up to meet my eyes.

  "So, who is she anyway?" I ask, tilting my head towards the stranger.

  She smiles from ear to ear, "Remember when I told you about my lifelong friend? My best friend?"

  "Ah yes, the girl you don't get sick of." I smirk.

  "Yes, that's the one. Mia."

  I nod, but I’m still reluctant to warm up.

  "Would you please come meet her?" Her voice is hopeful but I can tell she’s holding her breath.

  I shrug in agreement but truth be told, the last thing I want is to take a step towards her.

  Willa smiles and takes my hand in hers to pull me toward her awaiting friend. Her hand is cool, almost cold. It feels nice on my hot one. I curl my fingers around hers. It's the first time I’ve really noticed how well her hand fits in mine. But then again, I haven’t held her hand since that first trip through the woods from her city. I feel my hand reflexively tighten around hers.

  The walk over to the edge of the clearing is too short. I force Willa to stop pulling me when I’m a few feet away from the unfamiliar face. She releases my hand and catches...Mia...by the arm. Mia jerks away, obviously not wanting to be any closer to me either.

  "Okay..." Willa begins, "I guess I'll properly introduce you." She looks at me then Mia and then me again. My eyes are fixed on Mia and hers are on me.

  "Mia, this is Nathan Ambers," she waves one arm toward me. "And Nate, this is Amelia Burnett." She waves her other arm towards Mia.

  Mia is slender and tense. She has chocolate brown hair and light skin. She is a tad bit taller than Willa and her eyes –though I find Willa's greyish blue eyes far more mesmerizing and soothing– Mia has some amazing eyes herself. They’re crazy bright blue, the type of eyes you could get lost in, but only if you can withstand the burning sensation that comes with them. Mia is definitely a sight, but Willa has the power to catch my eye and keep it.

  Willa forces us to sit down and try to get to know each other, but in the end, Willa does most of the talking. I feel bad for not listening to her chatter but I’m busy unwillingly holding Mia’s intense stare. Mia hasn’t taken her eyes off me since we sat down. Her glare is burning through me as I feel all her judgment collapse on top of me. I try to focus on Willa's story about a kitten or something but I can’t look at her without Mia snapping at me, like she’s threatening me. Her eyes watch me like snakes. She doesn’t say much but when she does it sounds like her words are oozing venom. It’s not hard to tell that she hates me.

  "I think a little grey kitten is just what Georgie needed too." That’s the only part of her story I catch. I look at Willa, ignoring the growl coming deep from Mia's throat.

  "Yeah, I bet. So, how long can you stay?"

  Willa opens her mouth to reply but Mia chimes in before her, “Not long. In fact, I think it’s about time we get back. I'm freezing." She complains. I stare at her hard.

  "I was actually talking to Willa." I say.

  "I'm aware." Her eyes burn into mine but I’m determined not to look away until she does. She has to be the one to blink first this time.

  I feel Willa tense up on the log as she understands that our "small talk" isn't helping Mia’s and my relationship any.

  "She's right, actually. We probably should go." Her voice contains a reluctant off tone. I know that isn’t her choice.

  "Oh, good!" Mia bounces to her feet.

  "Come on. You just got here." I argue. "Just stay, Willa. Mia, I'm sure you could find your way back if the cold is too much for you." Willa looks over at me with unexpected disapproval, I see out of the corner of my eye.

  Mia smiles a deadly grin as she sits back down. I almost feel weak here, which is odd because I know I’m stronger than both of them combined. But I feel like Mia has the upper hand here. She has Willa. I know that. And Willa would most likely listen to Mia over me.

  For a brief second, I feel a tiny spark of jealously inflame inside me and I catch myself wishing Willa was my sister...or cousin or somehow connected to me so I could have some kind of claim on her. As the thought comes into my mind, I shove it away. What a stupid wish. I’m glad Willa isn’t involved in my life like that. I try to picture Willa in the ragged clothes I see most girls in. I try to picture her working as hard as I do. The thought makes me nauseous. It’s much better that she’s over on her side, safe and sound. I’m happy to be anything in her life at this point.

  I try to talk to Willa like we usually do, but Mia's snappy comments start to really get to me. I say a few snappy things myself before Willa asks us to act our age. The conversation goes nowhere and Mia and I start to make rude comments again.

  Finally, we’ve reached Willa’s last nerve, "Okay! I get it! Please just stop, both of you." Both our heads turn to the much more fragile Willa who is now accepting her defeat on turning us from enemies into friends. "Is it really so hard to at least try? Attempt to get along?"

  A smug grin flies a
cross my face unwillingly. I can't help but think, Well, next time, don’t bring her.

  Willa catches my grin, of course, and glares at me for a minute.

  "I get that you two don't really like each other. And that this meeting was very...um...." she struggles for the right word. Mia sits still as stone again. I glance at Willa, waiting for the word to come out. I start laughing. Mia looks disgusted with me and Willa just seemed confused.

  "What?" Willa finally asks after a long moment of my laughing.

  "Just the way you’re taking this, princess." I laugh more, "It's funny!"

  Mia snorts and crosses her arms. Willa rolls her eyes and smiles at me. I take a deep breath and get control of myself.

  "Now, if you'll excuse me, ladies," I pause and look at Mia. “I mean lady." I tilt my head in Willa's direction. Mia's face is suddenly bright red. Her lips curl over her teeth and her eyes are ready to rip me apart.

  "Be nice, Nathan." Willa orders but I can tell she’s holding back am amused smile.

  I chuckle, "Anyway, I gotta take off." I stand up and stretch my arm muscles, popping my shoulders, back, and neck more than once, just to get on Mia's nerves. I find her fury fun now.

  Willa jumps up too and looks at Mia.

  "Ugh! I'll wait for you over here." She says, pointing to the edge of the wood. "See you around, Ambers." She snorts under her breath.

  Willa follows me to the ladder where we stand silent for some time.

  "Well, that sucked." I say with a deep sigh.

  "I was hoping it would go better. You weren't much help."

  "Sorry. She's just so easy to fire up." I laugh and she does too.

  "Well, I don't care. You could be nicer. She’s really important to me." She crosses her arms and looks at me sour.

  "Yeah, I guess so." We’re quiet again.

  "You're not bringing her every time, are you?" I ask, holding my breath.

  "Well...that's not the plan. But I do want to stay on her good side. You know what I mean?"

  "This night was wasted." I glare at the ground, "Let’s meet up again. Tonight! Ditch Mia in the city and meet me back here!”

  Her eyebrows narrow, “I don't think I can do that, Nate.”

  I nod, showing her I understand. "Tomorrow, then?"

  She smiles. "And just not mention it to Mia?"

  "Yeah, I like the sound of that." I laugh, "Wow, not only have I turned you into a thief but I bet you’re getting good at sneaking around too."

  "Yeah, I think you’re a bad influence on me." She teases.

  "So, tomorrow night, right?"

  "Yes, that sounds good."

  She starts to push me up the ladder. I take over, leaping up until I’m on top of The Wall.

  "See you then!"

  She smiles as she turns back towards Mia. Mia gives me one last disgusted glare before turning around and disappearing into the darkness.

  I wouldn't mind if I never saw her again. But I have a horrible feeling deep in the pit of my stomach that Mia will talk Willa out of our visits. Would Willa listen to her? The fear of losing my safe spot makes me shaky again. Willa is like base. As long as I'm with her, I'm safe.

  As the thought of Mia changing Willa's mind about me lingers in my head, I start shaking harder and harder. What if when Mia was staring at me, she wasn't just star struck by a person from the other side? What if she was planning how to keep Willa away from me? Mia becomes a bigger threat in my head then she was in person. I feel sick and hot headed. It takes me a good deal of pointless fake worries and thoughts before I get control of myself. I’m being insane. I believe in the saying, trust has to be earned. While I have no trust in Mia what so ever, I do trust Willa. So, hopefully she can make good choices. One of those being me.

  Chapter Twenty-Six

  Willamina

  That was the most awkward half hour of my life. I had high hopes for Mia and Nate. I wanted them to be friends more than anything. But I think deep down, I knew this would happen. Mia always guarded me fiercely when a Teck boy showed any interest in me. Not that I ever cared much for any of them. But of course she would be hostile when the boy was a Worker. Still, I’m disappointed in her and in Nate too.

  Nate’s already on his way home, on his side of The Wall. Mia is disappearing ahead of me into the trees.

  “Oh no, you don’t!” I call, running into the underbrush to catch up. When I’m walking along beside her, she still doesn’t look up. “Would you like to say anything before I get into it?” I feel high-strung and angry. They behaved like children.

  “I have nothing to say.” She says without looking at me.

  “Alright then,” I have so many problems with what happened tonight, I’m not sure to begin. “Was this your plan from the beginning? Was the whole reason you wanted to come so that you could, what, scare him off or something?”

  She stops suddenly and spins around to meet my gaze. But I’m so mad I don’t even notice the burn of her eyes. “In a way, yes! Is that a problem? Maybe you didn’t notice, but Nathan was being a bit of a jerk too. But I didn’t see you ranting at him!”

  “Nathan was willing to be friends at first; you were the one who decided to be enemies. And for your information, I did tell him that he was being rude to you. I don’t know why I bothered! You were the instigator in all this!”

  “Willa, he’s a Worker! What do you expect to come out of this? I was trying to protect you because you’re my best friend!” Her voice falters and she looks down quickly.

  “Mia,” I speak gently this time. “Nate’s no danger to me. He’s a really fantastic person and you would know that if you gave him a chance.”

  “I’m sure he is! I know you well enough to trust your judgment of people completely.”

  I’m confused now. “If Nate’s not what you’re worried about, what is?”

  “Don’t you see? What the two of you are doing is dangerous! And not just for him. You could be taken away from us. Maybe you’d be put in prison or maybe…they would hurt you. I figured if I could sabotage your and Nate’s relationship, you might stop coming and then you wouldn’t be in danger.” She’s not apologizing to me, just explaining her reasoning. I can tell by the determined look on her face that she stands by her decision.

  We look at each other for a while then I continue walking. She follows me closely.

  “I’m not mad at you for caring about me.” I say after a few minutes of silence. “I’m mad because you tried to take the decision out of my hands. This is my choice and you didn’t even think to give me any say.”

  “No, I didn’t, because I think you care for him. I don’t think knowing the dangers makes any difference to you. You’re too invested in him to give him up willingly now.” As she says it I know it’s true.

  “You’re right. I care too much to let go. But now it’s time for you to make a decision. Do you care about your best friend enough to respect her decisions, even if you don’t agree with them? What good is it to be safe if I’m miserable? And I would be miserable, Mia, if I can’t be with him. If anything were to happen that would separate us. Divide the two of us more than we already are.”

  She doesn’t say anything for a long time, just walks and walks and walks. I’ve traveled this path enough times to know we’re almost out of the woods when she finally turns back to me.

  “Fine. It’s your life. Do what you want but don’t expect me to like it. I’ll come with you as often as you want me to and I promise I’ll be nice next time.”

  I hug her tightly. “Thank you, Mia. You’re the most fantastic, incredible, marvelous person to ever live! You know, besides me.” I tease.

  “Oh, of course. No one could be more spectacular than you, my queen.” We laugh like we used to, just a short while ago really. It seems like centuries. I’m an old woman and I’m being born all at the same time. Death to an old way of life, birth to a new one.

  We’re out of the forest in under a minute and we walk the empty city streets together. The fork
in the center comes before I’m ready to say goodbye.

  “Thanks again.” I say.

  She just nods and turns down her street. I walk down mine, suddenly very alone. The solitude almost crushes me at first, but then my overall happiness takes control of me. Everything will be okay now. Leila is better, Nate’s happy, Mia’s going to be nice, and hopefully, they’ll become friends.

  I fall into my bed wearily. Sleep has become precious to me over the course of this new adventure. My mind quiets in record time and I’m asleep.

  The next morning is glorious. The sun is bright and brilliant and the sky is intensely blue for summer. I’ve always hated the usual blinding grey sky summer brings. The coolness of the night has completely left and the heat is overwhelming.

  Around noon, Georgie gets on an old raggedy dress and goes out to the garden to play in the water jets positioned around the plants. I watch her through the window with envy. Playing in water is considered to be fit for children only. Adults and teenagers have to grow up and be mature. But why? Why should I care? I don’t.

  I run up the stairs and throw on an old yellow dress from many years ago that’s too short for me now. I braid my hair hurriedly so that the water won’t get it matted. When I run out and splash through a water jet, Georgie is astounded. But then she’s thrilled and she starts scooping up water and splashing me. I laugh and get her with the water too. We play together in the cool water for almost an hour, laughing like toddlers the entire time. But eventually we get hungry and go inside to change. I’m grateful that Mother is visiting a friend at the moment. She would have never allowed it. We walk through the French doors dripping and still giggling and look up to find Mother walking through the front door. We freeze.

  Charles is letting her in and taking her bag for her. She turns around and spies the two of us, frozen on the spot like idiots.

  “How did the two of you become so wet?” She asks in outrage.