The Theory of Unrequited

by Len Webster

  Somewhere along the line, Evan had lost her.

  They had disconnected.

  He understood why.

  But he had thought she’d forgiven him.

  Tonight, after the orientation parties, he’d pull her aside and demand that she be honest with him. For the first time in his entire life, he felt as if his friendship with AJ was threatened.

  That he was on the cusp of truly losing her.

  And he’d rather die a thousand times than not have her in his life.

  “Hey, are you Evan?” a girl wearing a Stanford school logo shirt asked with a clipboard and a smile on her face. “You are Evan. I’m Lucy. I’m one of your resident assistants. Follow me to the housing desk and we’ll get your room assignment.”

  “You know my name?” he asked as he headed to the trunk, and two other Stanford students helped pull out his suitcase.

  She giggled. “It’s my job to know all the freshmen’s names. Nice car, by the way,” she commented.

  “Thanks.”

  “Is it just one bag, Evan?” the taller of the two asked. “You sure packed light.”

  He nodded. “Yeah. I’m from Massachusetts, so I’ll buy everything here later. Just brought the essentials.”

  “Good idea,” the other said.

  “All right, Evan. Let’s get you moved in,” Lucy said, leading him away from the curb to the residency desk. The music grew louder, and the number of students around them seemed to triple.

  It was like an out-of-body experience as he followed his dorm RA all the while trying to spot the only girl he wanted to find at Stanford.

  The girl with those beautiful green eyes.

  The girl who had been his best friend since she was born.

  The girl who knew all his secrets and fears.

  The same girl who he’d forgive for destroying him with her silence.

  “And here we are,” Lucy said once they’d reached the table draped in Stanford school colors. “This is Tom; he’s also one of your RAs. I’ve got to go meet some of the other students. It was nice to meet you, Evan.”

  “Yeah, you, too,” he said and then turned his attention to Tom with a wide smile and a hat with different badges pinned to it.

  “Evan Gilmore, right?”

  He nodded. “You had to learn my name, too, huh?”

  Tom laughed as he bent over and searched through envelopes. “Nah. Phillies fan. I hate the Yankees, so when I have to be, I’m a Red Sox fan. Your brother is the best pitcher in the whole league. That inning against the Mariners, he’ll go down as a legend for that.” Then Tom stood straight and handed Evan a key and a yellow envelope. “Your key to your dorm room and your welcome packet. Elis and Devon will help you to your room and show you around.”

  Evan nodded. “Thanks.” Just as he was about to turn away from the table, he wondered if AJ had already moved in. He wasn’t sure where to find her or where to start since she had stopped answering his calls and messages. “Ah, Tom, can I ask you a question?”

  “Sure, Evan.”

  Taking a deep breath, he squared his shoulders and asked, “Has AJ Parker been through to collect her welcome packet and dorm key?”

  Tom’s brows furrowed. “AJ … You mean, Little Miss Red Sox?”

  Normally, he’d laugh at that stupid nickname the media and Red Sox fans had given her. He’d normally tease her, but she wasn’t here, and he wasn’t in the mood.

  “Yeah. Alexandra Parker,” he confirmed, realizing that Tom and Stanford wouldn’t know his nickname for her.

  “I’ve seen you both on TV,” Tom said. “But …”

  “But?”

  “I’ll double check to make sure,” he murmured as he flicked through the yellow envelopes and then checked a clipboard. “I’m sorry, Evan. I don’t have a welcome packet or key for an Alexandra Parker.”

  “What?”

  It was like every cell in his body died and knew the truth.

  His heart hadn’t wanted to hear it.

  He knew what was coming.

  He tried to shield himself from the truth.

  But it hit him with a force that rendered him speechless and breathless.

  “I’m sorry, Evan. Alexandra Parker must not be an enrolled student if she’s not on the incoming freshman list. She isn’t enrolled to attend Stanford. Are you sure she got an acceptance letter from the school?”

  Yes.

  I saw it.

  I saw her acceptance packet.

  She’d run into his house with their welcome packets the day they arrived in the mail.

  With a smile on her face.

  And freedom in his veins.

  In a single moment, all of that was tarnished.

  It was all gone.

  My best friend lied to me.

  Ruined our dreams.

  For absolutely nothing.

  12 Mg

  magnesium

  AJ

  Senior year of high school

  It was the week leading up to the homecoming game and dance. It was the very last high school homecoming AJ would ever experience. And as the week went on, she tried to ignore the homecoming asks that continued to occur around her.

  No one had asked her.

  No guy had even blinked at her.

  In fact, it was as if AJ had a big sign above her head as she walked through the halls that said, “Don’t bother. I’m going to be the worst homecoming date!”

  Normally, it never bugged her. But this homecoming did. It wasn’t as if AJ loved to dance. She was terrible at it. Last homecoming, she’d spent it with Evan, and they hadn’t cared. It was a home game against the White Sox, and they both wanted to see Kyle take on one of the best batters in the Major League. Kyle Gilmore and Paddy Wilmer had a rivalry that was so famous and talked about that it was always an amazing game between those two.

  But as more and more of her classmates were asked to homecoming, AJ started to feel envious. She wanted someone to ask her and think she was pretty enough to be their date. But it was quite clear that AJ wasn’t who the boys in her high school wanted as a date. And as she watched the school’s QB ask his girlfriend, the captain of the cheerleading team, to homecoming, AJ knew that anything that required a date was a social function she wouldn’t be attending. It was stupid not to go because she didn’t have a date, but she didn’t have many girlfriends to go with either. Her friends in the physics club were all boys, and AJ was the only girl. Apparently, physics wasn’t as glamorous as the chemistry club or even the biology club.

  The buzzing of her phone on her desk was a godsend as she glanced down to see Evan’s name on her screen. Her calculus teacher was too preoccupied with Carter and Jordan to notice AJ pick up her phone and open the message.

  Evan: Can you meet me at the baseball field during your free before we grab lunch?

  AJ: I was going to discuss the quantum theory during my free with Mr. Miller.

  Evan: Seriously, AJ? That’s how you wanna spend your free period?

  AJ: Yes. It’s the theory of everything, Evan. And I should know it inside and out if I’m going to discover my own theory and win the Nobel Prize in Physics.

  Evan: Geez. You don’t dream big at all. Don’t they teach that stuff in college? You don’t need to know it now. Look, Newton. You’ll win your Nobel Prize for best friendship if you come see me during your free.

  She smiled at his stupidity.

  AJ: Fine. That Nobel Prize for best friendship had better be worth it.

  Evan: Trust me, AJ, it will be. I’ll see you later.

  A white rose placed on her desk had AJ looking up to find the cheer captain with a smile on her face. Jordan Tanner was genuinely the nicest cheerleader imaginable. She was beautiful with her dark blonde hair and bright blue eyes. She didn’t dominate the school. She was r
ich and popular, but she never used any of those factors to better her life. She worked hard. And had approached AJ last year for help in pre-calculus when she was struggling. “Here, Alex,” she said sweetly.

  AJ blinked at her. “You’re giving me one of your roses?”

  “Of course. You helped me last year with pre-calculus. We’re friends. Plus, I don’t need two dozen roses. Carter just likes to show off. Sweet, of course, but totally unnecessary. I thought I’d give you one for luck.” Then her smile softened. “Someone will ask you to homecoming.”

  “You know that I don’t have a date?”

  Jordan nodded. “It’s okay if you don’t. You can come hang out with me if you want.”

  “Thanks for the offer, Jordan, but it’s no big deal. It’s just not my thing. Plus, if I want to get into any college physics programs, I’m going to need to start working on my applications,” she explained, lamely. But it was a silver lining. Instead of feeling sorry for herself, AJ would concentrate on the next chapters of her life.

  And that was preparing for college.

  “He’ll ask you, Alex,” Jordan said as she smiled and then returned to her seat.

  Who?

  AJ: I’m on my way. Won’t be too long.

  Evan: Okay. I’m here waiting for you.

  “Alex!” she heard Hunter shout behind her.

  Closing her locker, she turned to find Evan’s baseball teammate with a smile on his face. It wasn’t that cocky grin he had when he tried to get girls’ numbers. And it wasn’t that killer smile he had before he stepped up to the plate and batted during his games.

  This one was soft and felt like a secret.

  That it was one he only made for her.

  It was so stupid to think so, but she’d never seen him this way with anyone else.

  Is Hunter who Jordan was talking about?

  “I have to ask you something,” he said, causing her heart to race in her chest.

  “Uh, sure.” She hated the nervousness in her voice.

  Hunter set his phone in her hand, and she glanced down at it as he said, “Could you record me asking Willow to homecoming?”

  Disappointment flared in her chest as she glanced up at him. She had been mistaken to believe Hunter Jamison would want her as his date to homecoming. The dance was this Friday. If anyone was going to ask her, they would have by now. It was two days away. Not enough time to buy a dress to look the part. Not enough time to ask around if anyone did want her. AJ wasn’t that desperate. She would not be anyone’s charity case, and she wouldn’t make anyone hers.

  “Sure,” AJ finally said as Hunter’s green eyes glimmered. “When will you do it?”

  “Right now.”

  AJ’s eyes widened in surprise. “Right now?”

  “Right now.”

  “But you don’t have a sign.”

  Hunter’s signature smirk appeared. “I don’t need to a sign, Alex. Follow me.”

  He pushed past her, and AJ spun around and followed him to Willow’s locker. It wasn’t far from AJ’s. Willow was a cheerleader. Petite and small. She was a flyer. Easy to throw in the air. Last year, Jordan and Willow had approached AJ to see if she wanted to join the team. They weren’t surprised when AJ had gawked at them and asked if they realized they were standing in the science lab. Apparently, she had the figure of a flyer. But the knowledge of what a force gravity was definitely turned AJ off on the idea of becoming a cheerleader.

  “Hunter,” Willow acknowledged. Then she glanced over at AJ and smiled. It was as if AJ was on the honorary friends list with the cheerleaders since she had helped Jordan with pre-calculus. But the cheerleaders had never gone out of their way to attack anyone or make anyone’s life hell. It had been a vision statement the previous cheer captain had implemented before she left for college. “Hey, Alex.”

  “Hey, Willow,” AJ said holding up Hunter’s phone and pressed record.

  “What are you—” Willow was startled when Hunter grasped her hand and knelt on his knee. “Hunter?”

  Then he sang to her.

  He sang his homecoming ask in his smooth voice.

  AJ stood there, speechless at the fact that one of the school’s best batters was singing out in the open without a hint of insecurity. Then, suddenly, the glee club appeared from out of nowhere and joined in, providing soft “ohhs” and “ahhs.”

  When his song finished, he asked, “So what do you say, Willow? Wanna be my date to the homecoming dance?”

  Willow’s icy glare softened into a smile she bit back. “Why did you make me wait so long?”

  Hunter chuckled as he got off his knee, and AJ glanced at the screen to make sure it was still recording, and he was still in focus. “Because there’s no other girl I’d rather take. I was trying to get the glee club on board. And when they did, we had to perfect the song. So…?”

  “Say yes! Say yes! Say yes!” the students around them chanted.

  “Yes, you idiot!” Willow finally said as she wrapped her arms around Hunter’s neck, and he lifted her off the ground briefly. When Hunter set her back on her feet, Willow laughed and let out a relieved breath of air. “God, I thought I would be the only senior not asked to homecoming.”

  AJ pressed her thumb on the screen and stopped recording the moment Hunter and Willow glanced over at her, indicating that AJ was possibly the last senior who hadn’t been asked to homecoming. AJ lowered Hunter’s phone and then handed it to him.

  “Alex, I’m sorry, I didn’t mean—”

  She shook her head at Willow with a tight smile as people around them whispered about her not having a date to the dance. “I’ve gotta run. Congratulations. Have fun at homecoming.”

  Then she spun around and pushed her way through the crowd. When she was clear of the students, she swallowed the large lump in her throat, hating that it upset her that no one wanted to ask her to homecoming. AJ shook her head and decided not to dwell on it. Instead, she made her way down the hall and out of the main building. She walked down the concrete path until she reached the baseball field.

  Walking down the aisle between the row of bleachers, she frowned when she noticed Evan standing in front of a sign in his baseball uniform. AJ made it to the gate, pulled it open, and walked onto the field. She watched as Evan stepped aside while she walked toward him.

  She stopped the moment she noticed the twinkling sign and the message.

  You’re my perfect catch.

  And underneath it, written in black paint was a second message.

  Will you go to homecoming with me?

  “Evan,” she breathed, stunned that he’d put so much effort in asking her. It was perfect and baseball themed.

  Someone had asked her to the homecoming dance.

  And it wasn’t just someone.

  It was Evan.

  Her Evan.

  Her best friend.

  At that moment, she realized that it was him.

  He was who Jordan had insinuated.

  It was Evan who she had really wanted to ask her.

  It was perfect.

  “What do you think?”

  “It’s perfect,” she whispered as she shifted her gaze from the sign to his gentle smile.

  His lips made a relieved smile as his posture relaxed. “So you think Addison will like it?”

  It was perfect until it wasn’t.

  “Addison?” AJ asked in a small voice.

  Horror and embarrassment blackened her heart as realization almost forced her to her knees. Evan wasn’t asking her to homecoming. He wasn’t asking her for her opinion on his proposal.

  He wanted his best friend’s approval.

  AJ glanced at him and then the sign.

  It was so perfect.

  But it wasn’t intended for her.

  No matter how much she wanted
it to be meant for her.

  It wasn’t.

  It was for the vice-captain of the cheerleading team.

  “It’s perfect, Evan,” she said in a tight voice she couldn’t help. She tried to hide the pain, but it only made the pressure in her chest worse. She cleared her throat and faced him with the biggest smile she could force. “Addison’s going to love it.”

  “Great,” he said. Then that contented smile on his face faded into a frown. “AJ, are you okay?”

  She blinked at him, realizing how close she was to crying. “Yeah. Remember, I have that quantum theory to discuss? I’d better get back. I’m probably going to be in the lab so don’t wait up for me in the cafeteria at lunch. I have food Mum already packed. You concentrate on asking Addison.”

  “You sure?”

  “I’m very sure,” she lied.

  Me.

  Why couldn’t you have asked me?

  Why do I want it to be me he asks so badly?

  “AJ, are you sure you’re okay? You’re looking pretty pale right now.”

  “I’m fine.” She pressed her lips together. “I have to go. Don’t worry about us riding home together. I gotta meet up with my dad. So don’t wait. And hey, congratulations on being voted captain. I knew they’d all vote for you.”

  “You always do have so much faith in me, AJ.”

  Yeah.

  I guess I do.

  Dad: Alexandra, are you sure you don’t want me to come pick you up? My meeting has already ended.

  AJ: I’m sure, Dad. I haven’t taken the subway in forever.

  Dad: It’s the Green Line from South Station.

  AJ rolled her eyes as she walked down the front steps of the school and toward the gates. Through her last periods, she tried to shake off the disappointment. But no matter how hard she tried to get lost in physics, she felt the tension in her chest worsen. There was no reason to be so upset with Evan for not asking her to homecoming. They were best friends. She knew it hurt because AJ only ever wanted him to ask her to homecoming. In the middle of the diamond. Sweet and meaningful. But it wasn’t for her. And she had to let it go.