1- The Glass Room 2- The Spirit Stone -3-bear Hugs-4- Believe

by Beverly Machado

  “Let me get this straight. While Mama was dying, you were making friends with a lady you met there? Does she work there at Roseland?”

  “No, she is the school nurse at Picayune High School; besides I told you everyone was friendly. We all exchanged names and helped each other as we went thru that terrible time in our lives.”

  “Dad, you could have talked to me or to Gail. You know that.”

  “No, I didn’t feel that would be fair to you. You are also going thru the same loss that I am going thru. That is why I needed someone besides the two of you to listen to me. I hope you understand.”

  “Well, we met at the coffee house on the boulevard. We have never been alone. She is a good, decent woman. She invited me to walk with her and her friends. And one of her friends and her husband invited me to go to the movies with them. I am also going to walk with them this evening. You will like them. They are all good, decent people. Okay?”

  “This lady, what did you say her name was?”

  “Anna Lee Pigott.”

  “Is her husband still living?”

  “No, he died about a year and a half ago. She is also going thru a rough time. I should have invited them in just now when they brought me home. I will next time. Don’t worry about me. I am a good judge of character. Besides I would never do anything to dishonor your mother’s memory. I love you, son. I know how hard it must be to lose your mother.”

  Bill left and went upstairs to his part of the house. When Bill and Gail married, Emily, Jimmy’s wife, decided they needed a private entrance; so steps outside leading to the second story of this house was added. Also a kitchen and living room was arranged for them. It worked out fine for with those additions they each had their privacy. And now with him being alone, his daughter-in-law, Gail, cooks downstairs so they could all three of them eat together.

  I need to include them with my new friends, he thought. He showered and put his khaki shorts on with a pull-over knit shirt getting ready for his exercise of the day.

  “Bill, I am going walking. Would you and Gail want to come with me?” He thought it would be better if he included them.

  “No, Dad, we are not interested.”

  Jimmy was so happy to see Anna. She made him feel good. He loved talking to her; loved the way she listened to him. She never questioned him about anything; that was something else he enjoyed about her. She doesn’t know anything about me, only where I live. One day we should have a long talk. I want her to know all about me, he thought, and I would like to know all about her.

  “You look so deep in thought,” stated Lilly. “Everything okay?”

  “Yes, I was just thinking about how this walking is helping me. I should have been doing this for years,” he said as he joined the crowd.

  He continued his walking with this group. He enjoyed this new part of his life. It helped him tremendously as to keeping his thoughts of his wife at bay. It was so hurtful to him to know she was not a part of his life anymore; so sad, but being with his new friends gave him a new outlook on life. He had been walking with them for six weeks now. The soreness left him and he was feeling the good effects on his muscles. But still sometimes the loneliness overcame him.

  He needed to talk to Anna. Depression was setting in on him again about his wife. Anna had a way about her that calmed him. Maybe it’s the way she listens to him; letting him talk and clear his head and his heart of all the hurt he was feeling. Maybe it’s because she also was going thru the same feelings. But as much as it helped him, it also gave him a guilty feeling of burdening her. She never complained. She was always willing to listen to him. He needed her even though she did not know the effect she had on him. Yes, I will phone her. I need to hear her voice, he thought.

  Anna answered the phone surprised to hear Jimmy’s voice at the other end. “Hello, Jimmy, I was just thinking of you.”

  “Hope it was something good.”

  “That all depends. Are you hungry? I cooked a big pot of vegetable beef soup. Would you like to come eat with me?”

  “Sounds wonderful. Yes, I am hungry. Gail didn’t cook yet because she had some errands to run. What time would you want me to come over?”

  “Look, it’s not anything fancy; just soup and crackers and ice tea. I don’t even have any desert made. Don’t expect a candle light dinner. Let me give you my address. I live on South Curran Street. Come over whenever you want. It will be ready in about thirty minutes. See you then.”

  Jimmy was so excited. It will be the first time they will be alone; time for us to talk and get to know each other, he was thinking. He took a quick shower, shaved even though he had just shaved this morning, and dressed casually. Thirty minutes later he was knocking on her door. It was a small frame house close to the other houses. Not much of a yard as the house was close to the sidewalk. Just a small flower bed lined the walkway. When she was opening the door, she was taking off her apron at the same time.

  “Hi, come on in. Good to see you. Hope you are hungry, because I always cook so much when I cook soup.”

  “That delicious smell would make anyone hungry. What can I do to help you?”

  “You can put ice in the glasses and pour the tea. We are just going to sit here by the kitchen table. Okay?”

  Jimmy was thinking, we can sit on the floor and eat and it would be fine with me as long as we are together. But of course, he did not say that.

  “That’s fine with me,” is what he replied.

  “You must love to cook to make soup this good.” Jimmy said.

  “I’m glad you like it, and yes, I do love to cook. I guess if you asked me what my hobby is, I would say cooking.”

  “I could tell.”

  “What do you like to do in your spare time?”

  “I like to swim. I miss my swimming pool that I had at my house, but when Emily got so “out of it”, I was afraid she would fall in. Covering it was not safe as far as I could tell, so I had it filled in. We used it a lot when the boys were growing up; and even after they were grown. Emily and I would swim every day. She also loved it. That’s why I decided, to be safe, I had it filled in. But I do miss swimming.”

  “I go swimming. There is a large pool at the Community Center at the end of West Canal Street. Have you never gone there?”

  “No, I knew it was there, but that is something I never took advantage of.”

  “Well maybe we could go sometimes.”

  What a generous offer; another way to spend time with her. He answered her. ”Yes, I would like that. I do miss my swimming. Not everyone knows this, but I was a Navy Seal in my early years.”

  “Wow, no wonder you love swimming.”

  He was enjoying his soup and just being here looking at her across the table from him was making him feel better. She is amazing; so energetic, such a fun person. Yet he knew she was also grieving for her husband. It had to be so hard for her husband to leave her. Well Joe, I never knew you, but I would like to take your place and look after her, his thoughts running away with him.

  “Just let me know when you want to go. I’ll be there,” with bells on, he thought.

  They finished eating and while clearing the table, Anna spilled the crackers on the floor. They both went down to retrieve them. When reaching for the same cracker their faces were so close. He wanted so much to reach out and touch her soft face, to run his finger across her full lips, then to gently place his lips on hers. He looked in her eyes and did he see the same want and need as he was feeling? Moments passed as neither moved. But their first kiss was only a promise in hopes to be satisfied later. His hands shook slightly from the anticipation of what could have been. He didn’t want her to see his need to make unbridle love to her.

  “Let me wash the dishes for you.” He was thinking of a way to keep his hands hidden from her while calming himself down.

&n
bsp; “Okay, then we can enjoy a cup of ice mocha. How does that sound?”

  “Yes, my new favorite drink. Yes, that will be the perfect finish to a perfect dinner”, he said not daring to look at her as his need hadn’t left him yet.

  Anna was so anticipating that kiss that went unfulfilled. She wanted to reach out to him having him so close to her, but she didn’t feel it was her place to go to him. How wonderful to be kissed again. She missed the closeness she and Joe shared. She longed to be held in loving arms. Not just any arms, but she was being overwhelmed by the feelings she had for Jimmy. She knew he was wanting her as much as she was wanting him. She also knew he was just being gentlemanly; not wanting to take advantage of her. She wanted to tell him it was alright. Her body was screaming inside of her, take me to another galaxy where birds fly without moving their wings, where naked bodies feel each others warmth wrapped in burning desire until fulfillment overcomes them. Take me, take me, she was pleating with her eyes. If not now, then a time will come for us to share our needs. It will be. It’s has to be.

  She had to make normal conversation to calm herself down before he saw the affect he had on her. So while they sat at the kitchen table, enjoying their drink, she asked him, “Jimmy, I know you work at the National Astronautics and Space Association or Nasa as we call it. Jake told Lilly and me, but I don’t know what you do there. Care to talk about it?”

  “I am an Astrobiology Research Engineer Senior Execrative.”

  “Well, I am impressed. No wonder you live in such a beautiful elaborate home. How long have you worked there? Or, I should ask you where are you from. I know you are not from Mississippi. I can tell by your accent.”

  “I am originally from Houston. I worked there at the Johnson Space Center before being transferred here.”

  “Well I should tell you a lot of people here were very angry about Nasa moving here; me included. They came here and took over people’s land that was in their family for hundreds of years. It was so sad. I was involved in this government take-over simply because my parents were one of the many that had to move off their land. The land was passed down from my grandparents and their grandparents. It was not in the test site area, but at the edge of the buffer zone. My whole family was very sad watching them search for land to move to. It was hard then to travel without delays. So many houses were bought by the government and given back to the people if they moved it from the land it was on. No building was allowed to stand on any of the land designated for Nasa. There were so many houses being transported down the roads to their new locations that a one of two hour wait was a common thing. Even graves were unearthed to find a new resting place. It was a sad time.”

  “I came after all of that took place, but I heard about it and felt sorry for the people that, that happened to. I am also sorry for your people and for you to have to go thru that. Did your people find a new location that they were happy with?”

  “As happy as they could be. They moved just a few miles further north of their land.”

  “Sometimes life can be so cruel.”

  “Yes,” but now she was not thinking of the land taken from them, but of loosing her husband, Joe.

  Needing to change the subject, he said, “I want to take you out to eat. Where is your favorite place?”

  “Any of the fish houses here. That is what Picayune is known for, their seafood restaurants. Do you like seafood?”

  “Yes, it is my favorite. Or I should say, was. Now your soup is my favorite,” he said while giving her the sweetest smile she had ever seen. They talked for another hour, until they decided to call it a night. ”Let me know when you are ready to go for that swim. I am looking forward to it.”

  Again he looked at her with loving eyes, wanting to touch her, but not wanting to force himself on her. He left just thanking her for their evening.

  “Where were you, Dad? You left the note for Gail not to cook for you or to wait up for you. Were you with your new friends again or maybe with just one of your new friends? What about your lady friend, Anna, is that where you were?” Bill said with sarcasium. “Did she heat dinner up for you? You don’t look hungry? What else did she heat up for you?”

  A hand went flying out and struck his son’s face. “Don’t you ever say anything like that about Anna. I told you she is a decent woman. And also you are insulting me. Do you think I would take advantage of any woman especially a good, decent woman!” He was shocked at the emotion he was showing. Never in all his years of raising his two boys, did he hit them.

  “Well, that answered my question of how much this woman means to you. A man will always be quick to defend the woman he cares about. Oh, how quickly we are to forget the woman that spent her life taking care of you and suffered to bear you children. Just bury her and find another one; huh, Dad?”

  “I was sorry I hit you; but now I want to hit you again. You have no idea the suffering I am going thru with the loss of your mother.”

  Gail had to cut in; “I’ve never seen either one of you so angry with each other before. Can’t you see you are both hurting from the lost of Mom? Dad, Bill just thinks it is too soon for you to find someone to replace her, that’s all. And he is at such a loss without her. You both are hurting inside for the same person; me included. Dad, you have to recognize were Bill is coming from. It’s not that he doesn’t want you to be happy with or without someone else. He is still dealing with the woman he loved and loss. A man and his mother have such a strong bond that when it is broken is unbearable. Be patient with him. A bond with a father and son is also insufferable. You both need to hug and forgive each other. Bill just thinks you haven’t given yourself time to heal before reaching out to someone else. ” Gail was shook up. Never did she ever have to come between them.

  “You are right, Gail. Okay, son, I’m sorry I hit you. It won’t happen again. I love you and I know you are at such a loss for the most perfect and loving mother. Will you let me hug you? You are my precious son. The son I always admired.” He reached out his arms and Bill let him enfolded him. “I’m sorry Dad, It just gets me to see you so happy while I am still grieving.”

  “I am also grieving. I understand.”

  Tears were stinging both their eyes as they released their hold on each other. “I will try to understand. It is hard, but I will try to understand. I am also sorry. Forgive me.” Gail took Bill by the hand and together they went upstairs to their living quarters.

  The next morning while Gail was fixing Jimmy’s breakfast she said,

  “Did your friend, Anna, cook dinner for you, Dad?”

  “Yes.”

  “What did she cook?”

  “Vegetable beef soup.”

  “Was it good? Did you like it?”

  “Yes, I did. She is a very good cook and so are you, I appreciate everything you do for me. I just want you to know that.”

  “I think I will like her. If you like her than I will, too. Bill will come around. It will just take time. He had to leave early this morning for work. They have an auditor coming in to check the books this week at the Finance Company. He said he might be late in getting home, too. He does work hard. It’s hard dealing with the public, especially where their money is concerned.”

  “Yes, I know. He is a good son. I need to be more patient with him. Thank you for understanding about my friend, Anna. Your opinion means a lot to me.”

  Chapter Five

  They made arrangements that they would met at the community center. They arrived at the same time. Anna showed Jimmy where the men’s dressing room was located and she went to the ladies dressing room. He was ready and waiting for her to come out. When she did, Jimmy had to take a hard swallow. In her one piece red bathing suit, she was more alluring then he realized.

  “You’re looking good, Jimmy.”

  “A fine thing for you to say while you still have your young g
irl figure.”

  They smiled at each other; so happy to spend this day together. Jimmy reached his hand out to her to keep her from slipping. “It is slippery here with the young people splashing water.” She took his hand and it felt so good to have a man looking out for her again. “Don’t forget, we are going to eat at the fish house after our swim.”

  “I couldn’t forget that. I am looking forward to it.”

  “Okay, let’s hit the cold water.” Still holding hands, they entered the pool. “Can you swim, Anna?”

  “Yes, maybe not as good as you, but I won’t drown. You won’t have to save me.” At that she let go of his hand and hit the water; swimming. He took off. It felt so good being in a pool again. He was swimming back and forth with such strength that she decided to hold onto the side of the pool and watch him. When he came up to her, she said, “Wow, it’s no wonder you love to swim. You are so good at it. I love watching you.”

  After they swam for an hour, they decided to call it a day of swimming. “I want to show you inside the building. Let’s get dressed and we will see what is going on inside.” He was surprised to see all the exercise equipment. “I didn’t know this was here. Do you exercise here?”

  “Yes, I walk three days as you know and two days, I come here and exercise.”

  “So now I know how you keep your girlish figure.”

  “That’s my secret.”

  “Let’s go to my house for me to change for dinner. You brought a change of clothes?”

  “Yes, let’s go.”

  When they entered her house, Anna thought, if he doesn’t come to me then I will go to him. Neither Anna or Jimmy could not hold back their passion any longer. It hit them at the same time. They reached out to each other with animal lust. Their first kiss ignited a fire in both of them not to be denied this time. With their arms holding on to each other, Anna was leading him to her bed. While pulling her clothes off, she was helping him undress. As they fell in the bed, their lips so hungry for the taste of each other, their hands searching, moving, feeling in such desire to satisfy each others sensual appetite. Their movements so in tune with each other, animal lust captured in every move they made together in such ecstasy; so hungry for the sex they denied themselves for years overcame them. He rolled off her, panting for breath, only to hear her doing the same. He reached out and held her close to his chest. “Oh Anna, my love, I hope I didn’t hurt you. I planned on being gentle with you, but instead I was like an animal in heat. I love you. I loved you from the first time we went walking together. Did I hurt you? “