Heart's Desire

by Sorcha MacMurrough

  Even when four o'clock approached, she was glad she'd see Austin Riordan again, if only to tidy him away, just like all the other chores she had tackled that day. As the hands of the clock neared half past three, she resolved that at least this time she would be prepared for his incredibly disturbing presence.

  She went into the ladies' room and checked herself critically in the full-length mirror. She gave her tresses a good brushing, and, feeling rather light-hearted, decided to leave her hair down under her cap just for a change. She reapplied her blusher and lipstick, and, as an afterthought, decided to put on a bit of eyeliner and mascara.

  She smoothed down her uniform, and decided to remove her apron. Finally she was satisfied with her appearance, and hoped she looked placid even if she didn't feel it.

  A wave of excitement gripped her stomach as the time for the meeting approached. Sinead felt almost light-headed as she neared the door of Room 103. Giving herself a mental shake, Sinead determined that she would be polite and charming, give him a few minutes of her time and bow out gracefully.

  But none of her resolutions prepared her for the overwhelming shock of the scene which greeted her as she opened the door. It was not so much the intimacy of the embrace Austin was locked in, but the voluptuous woman who was clinging to him. Sinead's knees nearly gave way beneath her as the sultry eyes locked with hers, a gleam of contempt and triumph cutting through her fragile defenses.

  Margaret. No, it couldn't be, Sinead screamed inwardly.

  But the look of pure hatred on the other woman's face was unmistakable.

  So was the embarrassed expression on Austin's face, as he hastily disentangled himself and exclaimed, "Nurse Thomas, you're late."

  Sinead willed herself to respond, but could only move backwards in an unconscious effort to get as far away from the two of them as possible.

  Before she could escape, Austin's commanding tones penetrated through her shock. "Come right in and sit down, Nurse Thomas. Ms. Knight was just leaving."

  Sitting was the last thing Sinead wished to do.

  Yet Austin was already on his feet ushering Margaret out of the room.

  Sinead remained riveted to the door frame, not wishing to give Margaret the satisfaction of seeing her turn tail and run down the corridor, despite the overwhelming desire to do so. Her ears buzzed as she heard Margaret's concerned cooing noises continue down the corridor, ending with the ping of the elevator.

  Too late Sinead decided that flight would be the best course. Just as she yanked the door open, she collided into the broad, muscular chest of Austin Riordan. The exciting contact, as well as the impact and her recent shock, left her gasping for breath.

  Austin's arms came up to grasp her firmly.

  Though Sinead weakly struggled, she was grateful for his strong grip when she felt herself break out into a cold sweat. Her knees still buckling, she cried out, "Austin!" before her world went black.

  Chapter Five

  What a lovely dream, Sinead thought with detachment, as she felt herself wrapped in a warm embrace. Feathery strokes smoothed back her tousled hair and strong fingers stroked down her neck as her uniform's zipper separated. She heard her name whispered, then uttered in even more thrilling, deep, seductive tones as her ears was nuzzled gently. She lay prone on the bed, completely powerless under the languid caresses. Her pleasure knew no bounds as the strong hands massaged her shoulders and upper arms.

  Sinead reached up to feel the solid maleness of the broad shoulders encased in some smooth material. She caressed the silky hair at the base of the powerful neck. A nagging doubt at the back of her mind told her that this was certainly a very vivid dream, but she savoured the sensual delights of the warmth and physical contact which she had been denied so long.

  Sinead heard her name whispered once more, before her mouth was taken in a brief, soul-stirring kiss. Then she felt her arms smoothed down to her sides, and moments later, a cold cloth pressed to her face and neck.

  "Sinead, Nurse Thomas, try to sit up," the voice commanded.

  Sinead's eyes flew open as the cool fabric dipped between her breasts. She struggled free of the arm around her back and the intimate contact of the soothing compress and tried without success to get to her feet. She wriggled impotently as both hands held her fast.

  Her alarm grew, and not merely because of the intoxicating closeness of Austin Riordan. As she cast a desperate look around the room, she realized that he had laid her out on his own bed. What would people think if they came in now and saw the two of them together?

  "Now, now," he soothed, "are you sure you're ready to stand?" He removed the cloth, but kept her imprisoned firmly against his hard chest.

  Sinead smothered her panic, realizing that the more she struggled, the less likely he was to let her go. She decided to play the weak female in the hope that he might be lulled into a false sense of security and thus give her the opportunity to escape.

  "Oh Mr. Riordan, I have no idea what came over me!" she simpered, avoiding his sharp glance. "I must have forgotten to eat my lunch today. Have you a glass of water?"

  Sinead hoped that he would have to go to the bathroom to fill the glass. Then she could bolt out the door.

  Her spirits lifted as he moved away from her on the bed and stood up.

  "Yes, of course, just a moment," Austin said, with a reassuring pat on her shoulder and a small wry smile.

  She avoided his puzzled gaze, and counted to three before she bolted.

  "Just hold it right there!" he snapped, before she had even reached for the handle. "You didn't fool me for a minute. And you're not getting out of here that easily. Sit down and rest. You just fainted dead away, for pity's sake."

  "I'm better now, honestly," Sinead protested, though the gleam in his eye made her feel weak all over again.

  "Even if you are, you're not running out on me until I get a few explanations. And until we have our conversation together which we had to postpone yesterday. Now sit down in that chair," Austin said, pointing to one by the window, "and don't move until I get you that glass of water."

  After the excitement of the day and the shock of the past ten minutes, Sinead had no fight left in her. She sank into the tan leatherette armchair, feeling emotionally drained. She gratefully accepted the cool glass which he pressed into her hand before he sat down at the foot of the bed facing her. She drank deeply and sighed. At last her tongue didn't feel like it was glued to the roof of her mouth or that her stomach had turned inside out.

  "Now that you're feeling better, would you mind telling me the real reason you fainted?"

  Sinead started violently. One look told her that he wasn't about to be fobbed off with a silly excuse about skipping a meal. She remained silent for several minutes, trying to analyze her feelings. Certainly there was the shock of seeing Margaret again. But was it also because she had found Austin in her arms? Was she jealous?

  She fidgeted guiltily, and clapped her hand over her mouth in undisguised embarrassment when Austin suggested, "It couldn't be because you were upset to find me in the arms of another woman, now could it?"

  Sinead spluttered, "Of all the egotistical--" as she turned to leap out of the chair, but a firm hand held her in place. The gray eyes gleamed with enjoyment as they surveyed her deeply flushed face.

  "Well, then, tell me what upset you."

  "If you don't mind, I really would rather not say, except that that, er, lady and I have met before under rather unpleasant circumstances."

  "I see," Austin said, obviously curious, but considerate enough not to press for any more information.

  Sinead summoned up the courage to look into his eyes, and read a rather gentle expression in their stormy gray depths which emboldened her to say, "If it's not too personal, may I ask how you happen to know Margaret Knight?"

  "No, it's not too personal. The truth of the matter is that I met her in Dublin, at the last hospital that I worked at. She's been on the lookout for a new post and has an interview the
day after tomorrow down here. She rang up the hospital to see if I was around and found out that I was here as a patient. So being a good friend, she just popped in."

  "I see," Sinead said, feeling chilled one more. ‘Good friend' indeed. She'd seen them all over each other. While she couldn't blame Austin for being attracted to the voluptuous Margaret, the whole incident brought back all the bitter memories she'd tried to force out of her mind ever since she had first laid eyes on the woman.

  "You still seem upset, Sinead. Do you want to talk about it?" Austin asked gently.

  "No, thank you, Mr. Riordan, I'll be fine," she said in clipped tones. "I have to go back to work now. I apologize for my disgraceful display, and won't trouble you with my presence any longer."

  She gave him a look of cold disdain as she attempted to rise again.

  Once again the warm, soothing fingers held her immobile. "Not so fast, Nurse Thomas. I'm willing to consider that part of our business temporarily finished, but I still haven't told you why I wished to speak with you in the first place."

  Sinead bristled, tired of being trapped in this awkward situation. She felt intoxicated by the sheer power and beauty of the man in front of her and knew she had to escape. "I have to finish for the day and I'm off for the holidays starting tomorrow, so if it really can't wait, then please just get to the point so I can finish my shift and go."

  "The point is, Nurse Thomas," he said stiffly, "that you're not going on vacation tomorrow, because you'll be working for me as my private nurse."

  Her eyes rounded. "What!? Don't be silly! I refuse to listen to this nonsense," she insisted, once more trying to rise from the chair.

  She was pinned once more by his hand and huge body, six foot four if she had to guess, even larger than her brother-in-law Mike.

  "I assure you I'm perfectly serious. I've spoken to Dr. Jameson. He's of the opinion that I need some medical help and that you're the perfect nurse to assist me."

  Sinead opened her mouth to protest again, but found her words silenced by the pressure of his hands enclosing hers in his own.

  She tried to pull away, but he insisted, "Listen for a moment before you fly off the handle. I need you, Sinead! It's been my own stubborn pride which landed me here in hospital. I refused to recognize my diabetes until it was almost too late. If you hadn't come along, I might not have even made it here safely. Now that I am here, I have to learn how to keep myself out of the hospital. The only way I can do that is by learning how to take control of my condition."

  Sinead listened to this logical plea for her help, but wondered why she felt so manipulated. She didn't want this domineering man turning her life upside down just when she'd finally got back her control.

  Austin waited for her to respond. When he saw the mixed emotions revealed so clearly on her beautifully expressive face, he continued more gently, "I know that you have qualifications in nutrition and you're free for the next fortnight. You saved me in the street and I know from what everyone, including Dr. Jameson, has told me, that you're an excellent nurse. I'll pay you as a private nurse, so you'll have extra money for Christmas. I'm sure that's not the reason why you'll say yes. I know you're dedicated and compassionate. So I'm not ashamed to admit how much I need your help."

  Sinead could not help but feel flattered at the offer and the complimentary things he'd said about her. Yet she remained suspicious of how he had known her name and kissed her in the car. Even worse, she was frightened of her own feelings whenever he came within twenty yards of her.

  But he did have a point about needing help with learning how to cope with his diabetic condition. She wouldn't mind the extra money either. She thought of all the lovely presents she could buy for Mike, Maeve and the new baby, a tiny way to pay her family back for all they had done for her.

  "Well, in that case, Mr. Riordan, I can hardly refuse your very generous and flattering offer. Though it has to be on the condition that it's only for two weeks, and I'll get at least some time off to get ready for Christmas."

  "You'll have a lot more free time at my house than you will here and you'll be well paid," Austin promised.

  "At your house? But--" Sinead began to protest, suddenly feeling chilled inside.

  "Yes, of course. I can't stand being in hospital another moment. You'll be my live-in helper. Dr. Jameson agreed it would be the best plan, since I live miles away from Castlemaine, and I'll need you to teach me what to cook, when to eat and so on."

  "I can't believe what I'm hearing! What if I refuse to live under your roof and be at your beck and call? I do have a life of my own, you know!" Sinead snapped, while she managed at last to escape from the chair and stalked toward the door.

  "Ah, yes, the incredible Dr. Sheridan, I take it. He can spare you for a couple of weeks, can't he? He'll be run off his feet with the big regional medical conference coming up anyway," Austin said with a hard stare, challenging her to contradict him.

  Sinead wheeled around to face him. "That's not quite what I meant. But now that you mention it, yes, Dr. Sheridan would be rather surprised to find me moving in with you!"

  Sinead was relieved that he had seen her and Mike together the previous evening. He certainly seemed to think they were a couple. If that was the case, surely she did not have to fear him. He couldn't possibly be interested in her. The thought of two weeks out in the country, with this exquisite man, was certainly very tempting. A small smile played about her cherry-red lips.

  "Well, does that smile mean a yes, or no?" Austin queried softly.

  Sinead was just about to agree when one last stab of concern struck her. "I don't understand, Mr. Riordan, why you need me at all. After all, you seem to have a very good, er, friend in Margaret Knight. Surely her nursing talents, amongst other things, would make her the perfect live-in nurse," she commented with a quirk of one brow.

  Austin shook his head emphatically as if he would not even consider the idea for a second. "No, no, I would only need help for a two weeks or so. I have no desire to make a longer commitment than that. I'm sure you're well-mannered enough to know when your services are no longer required."

  Sinead was stunned by the sheer arrogance of the man. This cold statement did not tell her anything she had not already suspected about Margaret's feelings for him. Still, it made him seem extremely callous all the same. To think that this was the way he treated all women when their affairs came to an end...

  The phrase also reminded Sinead again of her other life, of when she had seen Margaret last. To agree to Austin's arrangement was to put herself at risk emotionally in every way. It was bad enough that the old wounds had re-opened. She certainly didn't want to lock horns with Margaret if it could possibly be avoided.

  More to the point, could Sinead really trust Austin, or herself for that matter, if they lived under the same roof day and night for two weeks? She found herself jealous of Margaret, and discovered a competitive streak in her that she had never known before. Was it just a silly desire for revenge? Or a compelling rollercoaster of attraction between herself and Austin which had been set in motion the moment his lips had touched hers yesterday?

  Austin's voice commanded her attention once again. "Sinead, will you please just say yes?"

  Sinead felt suffocated by the nearness of him, even though he was sitting several ten feet away. The torment of indecision was over.

  She shook her head. "No, I'm sorry, I refuse. Mike would never agree. Besides, I've already made plans for my holiday, which don't include you or your little power games. I wish you well, Mr. Riordan, really I do, but I'm sure you will find someone else who will meet your needs far better than I can." Violet eyes flashing, she fled the room before he could say another word.

  Chapter Six

  Half an hour later, Sinead had her coat on and was practically running out of the main entrance, when a masculine hand gripped her shoulder.

  She nearly started out of her shoes and tried not to panic.

  "I'm sorry, Sinead, but I need to s
peak to you for a moment," Dr. Jameson said, kindly but firmly.

  Sinead's cornered feeling subsided as she looked up to see the distinguished sable-haired chief of staff. For a moment she had been terrified that the looming presence was Austin.

  But she knew full well what her boss was going to ask her. For the life of her she couldn't think of any reason which would satisfy Dr. Jameson as to why she had turned down Austin's offer.

  Dr. Jameson ushered her into his cozy if masculine office and gestured her into the chair placed squarely in front of his imposing oak desk.

  "Sinead, I'll get straight to the point. You assisted Mr. Riordan, our eminent architect, when he was in trouble yesterday. He's decided that you're the best medical assistant he can get at short notice to help him come to terms with his diabetes and prevent such an incident from happening again. I don't think I need to tell you about his health issues, what's at stake. What I think I do need to confide in you, my dear, is that he's a proud man, unwilling to admit that he might be less than perfect."