Pure Will

by Kristi Pelton

“Son,” he warned. Then turned to me. “Cam. Please ask him to put one on.”

  I smiled and Will shot me a don’t-you-dare glance.

  Abby whipped Drew with the dishtowel and he spun around.

  “Sweetheart, you know I’ll make it up to you later,” she teased and Drew began chasing her.

  Will’s face fell and he covered his eyes.

  “Don’t you two realize that a son doesn’t want to hear those things!” Will shouted.

  I sat my purse on a chair and he pulled me in for a hug.

  “Save me…” he said.

  “I think they are cute.”

  Drew caught Abby and they were chuckling and wrestling around.

  “I think you are cute,” Will whispered. “Naked.”

  I smacked his arm as blood rushed to my face.

  Will was in charge of mashing the potatoes. Drew carved the turkey. I sat the prepared dishes on the table and Abby kept everyone in line. By the time we sat down for dinner, we’d polished off two bottles of wine and laughed so much our sides hurt. This…was exactly what I wanted for a family. A fifth chair sat empty at the table and I knew without asking whom it belonged to.

  “Dear Lord,” Drew prayed. “We thank you for this feast that is before us and the blessings you have bestowed upon us. We are blessed beyond measure. We thank you for bringing Camden to Will’s life and to our lives. We pray Lord that we bring something special to her life as well. And Lord, our boy sits by your side today, please wrap your arms around him for us. We miss him more than words can say but trust that you both watch over this family. In your name we pray, Amen.”

  As I dabbed the tears I fought, I noticed so did Drew, Abby and Will. Without thinking, I said it, “I wish I could have met him.”

  And for a second, I regretted that I’d let those words slip. But then, Abby smiled so wide and said, “Cam. He would have adored you. And given how beautiful you are, Matthew may have given William a run for his money.”

  Will shook his head. “No way, I wouldn’t have let him near her,” he chuckled.

  Drew lifted his beer. “To Matty—meeting Cam.”

  We all raised our glasses and toasted…and with those words, tears turned to smiles.

  I loved my new family…

  CHAPTER—Will

  Having her body pressed up next to mine was the best feeling in the world.

  “Camden, don’t go back to your apartment. Please. Just stay with me,” I whispered.

  “Will. I won’t let him scare me. If I do…he’s won. Don’t you see that?” she said brushing a kiss over my chest.

  I wanted to pull my hair out. “Sweetheart, the only thing I see is what I have to lose and that…is you.”

  “You won’t lose me. Don’t you see that? I’m yours.”

  Even though I knew that to be the case, hearing her say it—left me speechless.

  “Will,” she said drawing her fingers down my cheek.

  Her haloed green eyes hypnotized me.

  “I love you. I. Love. You.”

  I took in the longest, slowest, deepest breath my lungs could take then released it just as slow.

  Her rounded eyes held such unnecessary questions. Did she think I didn’t love her?

  “Oh Cam. Take that love and multiply it by a million and you’ll feel what I feel for you.”

  This time, she rolled those eyes. “Seriously? Can’t you just say I love you back?” she teased. “Does it have to be a competition? Because I have no doubt I love you more!”

  While on her side, I smacked her bare ass with my bare hand.

  “No…you don’t.”

  Her eyes sprung wide and she gritted her teeth. “Don’t you ever smack my ass again.”

  SMACK! I did it again and grinned.

  She rolled over the bed, taking the sheet with her and started to run.

  “Do you think I can’t catch you?” I laughed and Wrigley and I went charging after her. The hallway was empty.

  “Wrigley. Where’s Cam?”

  His tail wagged and he went storming into the gym then barked.

  “You can run kid but you can’t hide,” I shouted as I followed my dog.

  “Wrigley, go…” I heard her in a hushed whisper. Wrigley barked again.

  As I rounded the corner, I patted my leg and he came straight to my side.

  “Good dog. Now sit! Stay!”

  I closed the door to the gym and Cam stood behind it.

  “That is so unfair that you have to use a dog!” she said then tried to run.

  With one arm, I captured her and lifted her back against my chest still facing the wall. She was naked under that sheet.

  I rotated my hips up against her and she pressed back against me. Both her hands went flush with the wall and the sheet fell to her feet. Damn she was beautiful from behind. With one hand, I reached around and found her breast and began massaging her breast and bringing it to life. Her hips instinctively arched toward me and I quickly shed my boxers.

  “God baby, you are incredible,” I said as I rubbed myself against her and she widened her stance ready for me. As I slid into her, I had no doubt that this was the closest to heaven I would ever get. And as she used the wall for leverage forcing herself back toward me, I reached around to the front of her to touch her favorite spot. My favorite spot. As her muscles clenched around me with every rotation of my finger, she arched her head back.

  “Oh Will,” she panted.

  I would do anything to please this girl. As my hand skated down the soft skin on her back, I traced over her tailbone then dipped a bit lower to see what type of response I’d get by skidding over her ass with my thumb. I’d never apply pressure without talking to her first, but wondered what type of response I’d elicit. When she spun around, forcing me out of her, then shoved me backward—that was NOT what I expected.

  “No!” she shouted in a broken voice and darted from the room.

  Immediately, I went after her.

  “Camden. I’m sorry. I wouldn’t have done that. I wouldn’t have hurt you or anything. I’m sorry.”

  By the time I reached the bedroom, she slid a t-shirt over her head and was pulling up some shorts without her underwear.

  “It’s fine, Will. I seriously have to go.”

  “Stop!” I ordered and spun her to face me.

  She shook…trembled and her fearful eyes left me unsettled.

  “Camden. I wouldn’t hurt you. Are you that scared of me?”

  “It’s not you Will,” she clenched and zipped around me.

  I grabbed my own shorts, pulled them up and dashed after her. It wasn’t me? Oh my God.

  “It was Max. Wasn’t it?” I hollered as I heard the door to the garage close. When I rounded the kitchen, I saw her keys still on the counter so I knew she had to come back. I opened the door to the garage and she was on the first step ready to come back in. She looked away.

  “Camden, don’t go,” I begged.

  She stepped past me and grabbed the keys.

  “Cam. Please. This is crazy. Don’t go.”

  Her little chin quivered but her eyes remained dry—still not meeting mine.

  “He hurt you that way didn’t he?”

  There was little to no reaction. She seemed stuck in a trance. Taking a chance, I reached for her hand, but it fisted. My insides were crumbling. The anger inside me began to surface over what he had done. He fucking violated her at 16!

  She walked toward her car.

  “I love you Camden,” I said with conviction. “I love all of you. I love whatever you bring to the table. And I will never hurt you.”

  She stopped shy of her car.

  “I love you too Will,” she said without turning around. “Please just give me some time. This is not about you, I swear. Just something I need to work through. Please be patient.”

  Helplessly, I watched as she got into her car and drove away. As I closed the door to the house, Wrigley lay on the kitchen floors with his snout resting on his paws.
His tail didn’t wag. It’s amazing the intuition dogs had.

  “I fucked up buddy.”

  Each step of the way, I’d expected Cam to react. Kissing. Oral sex. Sex. She never had. The biting thing was the only issue that had ever come up. Then I smacked her ass in fun…not thinking…then I upped the ante again. Shit!

  Chapter—Camden

  When I closed the door to the apartment, the tears came and I slid down the metal until I rested on the floor.

  “What’s wrong?” Kate shouted.

  My eyes sprang open to her and Liam on the sofa. Kate rushed to me.

  “Liam. Could you give us a bit?”

  He nodded. “Sure. Text me later,” he said brushing past me and patted my head like I was a dog.

  Kate took my hand and led me to the sofa.

  “Tell me.”

  I stared off.

  “Camden!”

  “I was so wrong Kate. With Max and the things he did. Because there were things that felt good to my body, I thought that meant that I enjoyed it or that it was ok. But it doesn’t negate the fact that he was wrong. The bottom line, he had me drink alcohol. Then he used my body for his satisfaction. There was no love.”

  Kate wrapped an arm around me. “I know. But you have love now.”

  I had just walked away from the man I love.

  “What happened, Cam?”

  “Do you remember when I told you that Max would be going down on me and then use two fingers…one in one place and one in the other?”

  “Yes.”

  “Then it turned into just the other place sometimes. Then it turned into doing it doggy style, and as we were doing it, he’d accidently ‘slip’. Then it was more alcohol and ‘can I just finish that way?’”

  Kate knew everything so it wasn’t really embarrassing any more.

  “Yes, sweetie, I remember all of it. What happened? Did Will want to do that?”

  I shook my head. “No. I don’t think so. We were just in a weird position and he kinda grazed his thumb over me there,” I said.

  “OK…and he went inside?”

  I shook my head. “No.”

  Kate crossed her legs Indian style on the sofa and sat back looking at me. “Then what happened?”

  I laid back and stared at the ceiling, drying my eyes.

  “I freaked out. Forced him to pull out. Left.”

  Kate covered her mouth. “Camden! You need to explain to him. He needs to know. That’s not fair.”

  Appalled, I turned and glared at her. “Oh he knows! He knows that I was violated in every effing hole on my body. He knows that there is no part of my body that Max didn’t get to! He knows Kate! What would make him want any part of that?” I yelled. I got to my feet, grabbed my purse and keys and walked out the door. I heard Kate tromping down the stairs behind me. After plopping myself in the driver’s seat, I rested my head on the cold steering wheel. Kate got comfy in the passenger seat.

  “Where we going?” she asked, shivering.

  “Sandbar. I want a drink.”

  CHAPTER—WILL

  My phone buzzed in my hand. I hadn’t put it down since Cam left….typing at least ten texts out then deleting them. My hands actually shook. Kate.

  FYI She’s with me. Upset. Drinking. She has to work through this.

  I wonder if Kate knew what had happened. What this was about.

  Do you know what this is about? Send

  Yes Will. She told me. I thought she told u. This is hard for her. U know how long we’ve known each other. This is the first time these feelings toward him have come up.

  Feelings?? What did that mean? She had feelings for Max. She’d didn’t tell me anything really. My heart crumpled.

  She told me a little but left quickly. Kate. I love her. Where are you? Send

  Sandbar not sure if u should come

  I’m not sure I can stay away. She has feelings for him? send

  Yes! Finally. PURE HATRED! Fine. I cant imagine her being mad at me for txting u. u can’t push her tho.

  I would never Send

  The Sandbar was quiet. I made my way in cautiously not wanting to scare her or make her run. I spotted them in a booth against the far wall. It was easy to sit behind them. I think Kate saw me, but I didn’t approach. Not quite yet. The waitress approached their table.

  “Another vodka water?”

  There was no answer.

  “OK. And another beer for you?”

  “Yes, please,” Kate said.

  “Sir? What can I get you?” she asked.

  “Iced tea please,” I said under my breath praying Camden didn’t turn around.

  Rough? He’d gotten rough with her. That’s all she ever said. He’d bitten her…I knew that. Smacked her on the ass. But I never, never thought for a second that’d he’d penetrated her in the back door. She was fucking 16!

  “Camden. Max is out of the picture. You have to let it go.”

  “Kate! Don’t you see? I thought I had done that. I thought I was so over it. The first time Will went down on me…I couldn’t even enjoy the earthshattering orgasm. Why you ask? Because I was worried he’d bite me! How sick and twisted is that?”

  I closed my eyes. My girl was hurting and there was little I could do.

  “Max was sick and twisted,” Kate said.

  I wanted to shout Amen!

  “Max is a monster,” Kate added.

  “I know that now. I want to be healed. I want this to be over. When Will touches me, I don’t want Max to ever come to my mind. And that’s what happened today. Do you know how much that would hurt Will if he knew that? He deserves so much more than what I have to give.”

  It took every single ounce of composure I had to not shoot upright from my seat and yell at her. I just want YOU! YOU!

  “Cam. He only wants you. The rest of that will pass in time,” Kate said, reading my mind.

  “What do I have to truly offer him?” Camden asked.

  I tugged on my hair.

  “You! That’s what. And that’s the best gift you could ever give him.”

  “Why do you think he hasn’t texted. Or called?” she asked. “If he loves me and he knows I’m hurting, wouldn’t he do that? No! Because he knows what Max did now.”

  As quick as that, my phone was out and I was typing a text.

  I love you send

  Suddenly, a wave of guilt rushed over me and invading her privacy was something I never wanted to do. When I heard the ding of her phone, I raised my hoodie and left. When I stepped out into the bitter cold, my own phone buzzed. Camden.

  Thank you. I need you. Please be patient

  Reading those words soothed me. I wonder if she knew that William meant protector. I’d forever protect her.

  Baby. I need you too. You can’t leave me like that. Send

  I got scared. And I’m embarrassed. And would you be willing to come to the Sandbar?

  My eyes glanced up to the sign that read Sandbar. I was standing on eighth street. Why yes, I would love to come.

  I’d love to send

  I stood outside in the cold for about five minutes then went back in lowering my hoodie. Kate spotted me first and she wore a crooked grin. Even though I understood the reason behind the grin, this was very serious to me.

  Cam’s green, rounded eyes found mine and she slid back into the booth. Making room for me? The look in her eyes was one of fear. As stupid as it sounds, I held my hand out to her, as if she were a dog going to bite. But when her fingertips curled beneath mine, I lightly tugged on her. Willingly, she slid from the booth and rocketed into my arms.

  “I love you,” I whispered.

  “I love you too. Can we go somewhere?”

  After lowering her to the ground and nodding at Kate, I led Camden out of the Sandbar.

  “I’m sorry. I’m so sorry,” I said, once we were in my truck and I was brushing slow kisses over her eyelids, nose, forehead, ears and finally her mouth.

  “Will. I’m sorry.”


  “No, Cam. I swear, I’ll never do that again. I…I didn’t know.”

  “Look at me!” she raised her voice and dragged my chin toward her. Our eyes finally meeting. “Don’t say that. I promise, someday, I want to try again with the man I love. With you. I just wasn’t ready and there was such realization in that moment of what he had done.”

  Big raindrop tears fell from her eyes, and with my thumbs, I erased them from her cheeks.

  “Promise me…Will. Promise me.” She spoke with such desperation.

  “Promise what, baby?”

  She swallowed. “That someday we can try that. You and me. I won’t let him own any part of me.”

  I nodded, tangling that mass of ginger hair in my hand and forcing her to my chest. “I promise.”

  Her release of breath was broken. “OK. OK. OK. Thank you.”

  There wasn’t really anyone who Matty talked a lot about. I’d heard most of the names, Wic, Woody, Steel, Johnson, O’Neil and Scotty. All of them remained in active duty after Matty’s death and it was a surprise when Woody reached out to us a few weeks ago. He was our only real connection to Matty, and all of us were nervous about what he had to share.

  He and I were meeting for a drink first, then I was taking him to Mom and Dad’s. There was no way in hell I was risking him sharing something that would hurt my mother, so I told Dad I’d meet with him and feel it out.

  I sat in a booth at Johnny’s West and waited. Hopefully he was on time because Cam was showing up about thirty minutes into it. Then we were all headed to the house if things worked out.

  I’m not sure what I expected—maybe fatigues, dog chains, I don’t know…maybe even a crew cut, but when he walked in, I knew it was him regardless and I raised my hand and waved. His jeans and Texas Longhorn t-shirt instantly irritated me. You don’t wear that sort of shit in Johnnys. He was shorter than me but just as well built. Dark hair.