Fallen Angel (The List #3)

by N. K. Love

  I wipe my hand efficiently—under more favourable circumstances I would’ve been tempted to lick it clean. I wrap the screwed up tissues inside a clean one and stuff them into my hoody pocket.

  The door’s ajar but Jack knocks twice.

  “Are you two decent?”

  Jax straightens out the covers and I feel for him because he didn’t get chance to wipe himself down.

  “Of course Jack.”

  My voice surprisingly holds steady even though Jax is nudging me playfully to try and throw me off. I feel like a teenager about to get caught by her parents. Jack breezes in, bringing with him his air of silver fox confidence. Eyeing me as I run my fingers through my hair. I try to look casual but probably look anything but. Cue deflection to humour.

  “Although, I’m not sure he could ever be accused of being decent.”

  I nod my head towards Jax and grin widely, a little too widely. His gaze drifts to Jax with an amused curiosity.

  “You know Bethany, the more you speak, the more I like you.”

  I smile and lean over to fetch Jax’s water. Orgasms make me thirsty and I know my cheeks are flushed. Jax pipes up then.

  “Funnily enough Jack, the less you speak, the more I seem to like you.”

  Jack directs his body towards me from the foot of the bed.

  “Do you see what I’ve had to put up with here Bethany?” I smirk whilst sipping on the straw. “This man has no appreciation for quality company... And on that note Bethany, please say you’re going to relieve me?”

  I splutter water all over Jax’s chest and cough. Fuckity, fuck, fuck.

  “Oh God. I’m sorry.”

  Jax has raised his hands at the shock of the impromptu cold shower. I can see by Jacks reaction that what he said wasn’t intended to come across the way I misinterpreted it. Jack still finds it hilarious but I just squint my eyes at him and shake my head.

  If Jax wasn’t at risk of bursting his stitches, I think he’d be joining Jack in laughing his head off too.

  “Yeah, really amusing guys—not!”

  Wiping my face on my sleeve, I jump up and head to the bathroom, nudging Jack as I walk by. I grab a fresh hand towel and go back to Jax.

  “Hey sweetheart, don’t blame me if your filthy mind is still in the gutter.”

  I ignore his emphasis of the word ‘still’ and dab the towel across Jax’s chest to soak up the droplets. I see that boyish grin again. Then I notice small suction marks dotted on his pecs and up to his neck, my eyes widen. Whoops. Jack has got to have noticed, he’s standing directly opposite him. I don’t even think Jax has seen them.

  If I wasn’t flushed before, I’m definitely blushing now. Actually, I think I’m more proud than embarrassed—God, am I fangirling over giving Jax lovebites?

  “Okay, let me rephrase; Are you going to stay here and takeover babysitting duties so I can go home to my wifey?”

  Wait, what? Is he serious? Did Jax suggest this? I freeze, open my mouth to speak and then close it again, lost for words. Jax responds on my behalf.

  “Jack, she’s not staying and you don’t have to either. You go home to Pam and her five sisters. I’ll be just fine.”

  “I’ll have you know they’re Pam’s cousins actually. I’m not into incest and cousins are legal.”

  Is he for real? That sounds gross. I’m keeping quiet.

  “Man, you are so sad… Anyway, I guess you’ll just need to swing by a few times to redress—”

  “—Ssshh.” Jack whispers loudly to Jax from behind the back of his hand humorously. “I thought we’d agreed not to speak of that again? Remember, what happens with Doctor Jack stays with the Doctor Jack…”

  “—my bandages, redress my bandages, dumbass.” Jax takes the towel from me and throws it at Jack, who steps out the way. “You know, considering you’re a lot older than us, you’re actually very childish. You and Pam need to get out more.”

  “Fine. I’ll stay one more night and then check in with you daily. I’ve just set up your replacement phone too, it’s on charge in the kitchen. So you’ll have no excuses not to check in with me when I’m done here.”

  I’ve kept quiet until now, enjoying the effortless banter between them.

  “I’ll visit too, of course, if you’d like.”

  Jack hands Jax the small plastic cup he’s been holding along with a fresh glass of water. The cup rattles with pills which Jax throws back into his mouth, taking a swig of water to rinse them down.

  “That would be great Bethany. I’m sure you have a proven impeccable bedside manner.” Jack says as he takes back the plastic cup back and heads for the door. He winks at me as I eye him suspiciously, then stops when he reaches the doorway before continuing, “Although—from what I have just gathered, your methods of checking his blood pressure and pulse are somewhat controversial.”

  Wiggling his eyebrows suggestively and flashing a wicked grin, the blue-eyed troublemaker disappears through the door chuckling to himself. Leaving me at a loss for words with my hand clasped over my mouth. I turn back to Jax who takes the comments with a pinch of salt, shrugging it off with a smirk and a shake of his head.

  Moving my hand from my mouth, I stroke my fingers over the marks on his chest.

  “I’m sorry, I didn’t know I had…” Jax doesn’t even glance down, which tells me he’s already seen them. “God, he must think I’m a total whorebag.”

  As I say the words I still find I’m mentally high-fiving myself for finally returning the favour from when he’d marked me similarly in the past.

  “Don’t apologise, B. I’m certainly not complaining. Jack’s a tough nut to crack but you’ve managed it. He likes you and he knows you’re not a ‘whorebag’.” Jax covers my hand on his chest. “Trust me.”

  “Well, in that case, good. I like him too. But—”

  I hesitate, not wanting to offend Jax.

  “But what?”

  Lowering my voice to a whisper.

  “—what’s the deal with him sleeping with his wife’s cousins? That is all kinds of wrong—”

  Jax stifles a laugh and clutches his left side. Then he reaches out and tucks my long hair behind my ear, giving him access to stroke the back of his fingers across my cheek.

  “He isn’t married, Angel.”

  “But you said… Wait, then who’s Pam?”

  Jax just raises his left palm and wiggles his fingers.

  Chapter Five

  Sunday 19th April 2015

  8:30am

  Jax

  After getting back on track with Beth, I’ve woken feeling all geared up to attack the day—well, attack it as much as I can from my bed, armed only with a laptop and my new phone.

  When Beth left yesterday afternoon I was tempted to try and convince her to stay over but resisted. It was purely a selfish whim that would’ve put her in an unfair position, having just got Willow back and after what I’d put her through already.

  Needless to say I ended up inviting Pam to help me out as a mediocre substitution. Since laying my eyes on her, I’ve only had sex with her and when that wasn’t on the cards, I’ve had to find my own release, always with her providing the visuals. Even when I’ve put on a porno it’s been Beth on the screen.

  Thursday night was one hell of an epic fail. Although it proved difficult to track this piece of shit down, there was absolutely no reason for it to backfire. But it did. I’d been meticulous with my checks. He should’ve been alone but he had hired muscle who were lying in wait.

  I hadn’t factored that into consideration. I’d pulled over nearby to fit my false registration plates then when I pulled into a side road by my targets house, the car was ambushed.

  The only explanation is that I was spotted the night before and they’d pre-empted my return. I should’ve just dealt with him that night instead of letting my head get fucked over! My lackadaisical approach is completely to blame for all of this. I got sloppy.

  There were three of them. They must’ve approached
the car from behind and waited until I was about to exit before they rushed it and dragged me out. We all wore balaclavas but these amateur pussies had no clue who they were fucking with. Those first few seconds was the only time they had the upper hand over me. I’d already gotten into the zone when I was in the car, so fighting them should’ve been a walk in the park.

  I had two of them down in less than two minutes then got into a struggle with the third man. I didn’t want to knock him out before learning whether they were affiliated with my target or just hired help. He eventually confirmed they were on a job, which told me the problem wasn’t as bad as it could’ve been had my target been well connected.

  Unfortunately that nugget of information was followed up with an ‘it’s nothing personal’ comment as he took one crucial second to plunge a concealed blade into me.

  My only saving grace being that at the same time I’d mirrored his action and stabbed him in his thigh with a knife from my belt. I twisted the knife putting him in excruciating pain so he’d let go of the handle immediately as he keeled over on the tarmac.

  At some point my balaclava had come off but I’m guessing the blood pissing out my face probably deemed me unrecognisable by that point. Regardless, those three fuckers were sparked out on the floor anyway.

  The drive home was a bitch. I put the pedal to the floor and focused on three things; 1) my breathing 2) getting home to call Jack and 3) how I was going to deal with Beth.

  I knew the injury wasn’t life threatening. Those guys weren’t hired to kill me, they just intended to get me to back the fuck off. If they’d meant to kill me, they would have brought a much more effective weapon to the job. As it was, the blade barely reached my ribs and the fact that the knife wasn’t ripped out of me meant that I didn’t lose a lot of blood.

  Jack said he’d come prepared for a blood transfusion to help balance me out but thankfully it wasn’t even necessary.

  I don’t know how I thought it’d be possible to keep Beth away from me, I obviously wasn’t thinking straight. She took control of the situation and, although I could’ve managed to call Jack myself and inject that morphine, I was simply awestruck by everything she did for me.

  Beth was a dream for me that night. I will never forget it. No matter what.

  When I finally got the balls to face her at the sink, she took my breath away more than that knife ever did. My Little Miss Contradiction emanated strength and vulnerability in equal measures. I felt her warmth, how she’d give anything to protect me, it was a new feeling for me. She knocked the winds out of my sails when, in her beautiful husky whisper, she said that she’d fallen in love with me.

  Ironically, the second the word ‘love’ left her innocent trembling lips, my fucked up mind twisted it into nothing but hate by the time it had settled in my ears.

  I hated myself for letting Beth believe it was true but I hated myself more for wanting to believe it was true myself. It hadn’t taken much persuasion from me to convince her she didn’t mean it. We’ve been on a manic rollercoaster together, she was just overwhelmed.

  I felt sickened, ashamed of myself. The thought of that guy pulling out the blade and me bleeding out in the road didn’t seem like too much of a bad idea at that point.

  By breaking my own boundaries, I’ve brought Beth—innocent, beautiful Beth—to the edge of my shadows. I’m caught between a rock and a hard place. The hard place residing very much between my legs and being controlled more and more by my heart.

  In the early hours of the morning, Jack and Carmel managed to get me upstairs where I found Beth’s note. One look at Carmel and I knew she’d done something. As far as she is concerned though, Beth is a casual hook-up and it needs to stay that way. Carmel isn’t involved in my personal life so the less she knows the better.

  It was thoughtful that she came over with Jack but also totally unnecessary. Other than once before, this was the first real time that my two worlds have collided and it made me uneasy and anxious as hell. Beth was gone but it was Carmel I didn’t want in my house, around all of my personal shit.

  Jack sensed my irritability, got the hint and managed to eventually get rid of Carmel with a lot more tact than I would’ve managed. I spent the next few restless hours drifting in and out of sleep, dosed up to the eyeballs with pain killers. Jack had done a great job with removing the blade without any complications. I expected nothing less from him, he is the best I know and a perfectionist.

  Beth’s note said to call her. On Friday, I must’ve picked up my phone thirty times to do just that, to see if she was okay, if we were okay. I was battling with myself like being on the world’s worst see-saw. Asking what the right thing to do was. Questioning whether this is the time to cut the ties. Hence my dick move when out of frustration I threw the phone up the wall, shattering it.

  Shortly after, Jack strolled into the bedroom as calm as ever, picked up the pieces and simply said ‘Bethany’s fine by the way, I messaged her.’ I didn’t respond, I didn’t need to. Jack’s a fucking good guy, one of only a few people I trust with my life.

  Carmel called on a burner phone she’d left to discuss what I wanted to do about my target guy. As much as I wanted to deal with him myself, I had to consider the marginal possibility that whilst he remained unaccounted for, he could be throwing his money into tracking me down.

  Now, the intention was never to kill him. I was going to damage his dick and then damage his bank account. But time was of the essence so I conceded to handing his limp dick over to Carmel to deal with. Once she finished with him Friday night, he’d have a constant reminder of the consequences bestowed upon him for believing that his wealth entitled him to a free passage to sexually abuse underage children—taking the term ‘filthy rich’ to the utmost extremity.

  His second blow will come later today when I fire up my laptop and make a huge dent in that wealth by way of my hacking expertise, along with a little help from a contact of mine in the financial industry. My associate will ensure the transactions look legitimate even though the prick wouldn’t dare alert the police anyway. Finally, once my contact has laundered the funds, I’ll make an anonymous deposit into the fourteen year old boy’s parents’ bank account. I’ll keep the remaining funds as my fee.

  Jobs like this always carry a fee but it’s never payable by the victims. They’re never financially disadvantaged. Nine times out of ten the culprit has more than enough wads stacked to cover my costs and their compensation. The compensation is always at my discretion and never in the agreement with the client.

  All they ever want is justice. That could be public or in silence or screaming in ball crushing agony. Anything to give them some peace of mind and hopefully to help them sleep better at night. Any money that they receive directly, isn’t given with the view that it pays for whatever crime was committed. It’s always with the view that it will be used to help them move forward, whether that’s to ease stress from paying off debts or uprooting and moving to make a fresh start or even to fucking burn as a symbolic ‘fuck you’.

  Saturday morning after Beth contacted Jack and when I finally got to hear her voice, I felt lifted. Her voice, although it was etched with uncertainty, was the equivalent to her wrapping her arms around my waist and burying her head in my chest. I itched to see her and things got a whole lot better when I awoke and found her laying beside me.

  When our eyes met I swear I caught mine whispering to her, willing her to tell me she loved me again. Fuck being stabbed, that was the scariest shit of this whole scenario right there.

  So life is back on track and although Beth’s back at Wills, we’re okay. I’m feeling motivated. First things first, I need to straighten things out with Carmel. I use the burner phone again but this’ll be the last call I make on it before ditching it. She answers immediately.

  “Is everything alright?”

  “Friday night, all sorted?”

  “Of course. Did you ever doubt me Sweetie?”

  She sounds cocky, even ver
ging on flirtatious. Carmel once hinted about us getting together, which I swiftly declined. I’ve since gotten her out of a few tricky situations but she’s an associate and that’s as far as it goes. Perhaps she’d still like us to be more but she’s never acted on it, mostly because she knows my feelings haven’t changed. I have never led her to believe any different.

  As always, I keep it blunt.

  “No. Just being thorough. Now everything can get back on track, so no more house calls. That was a one off and shouldn’t have happened.”

  “Ooh I’ve heard that line coming from your lips before darling…” Why’s she even bringing that shit up? “Sorry X. Ignore me. Go on.”