Addicted to You

by Renita Pizzitola

  “I’ll be sure to get a large pizza just for you. Extra black olives.”

  And I smiled. Because this was the Colby I knew. “Just get what everyone else likes. I can eat whatever.”

  “I know. But I also know how much you love your black olives.” He stood, dusted the sand off his shorts, and stole a quick glance in my direction.

  And yeah, the smile was still plastered to my face. I shrugged. “I’m starving. I’ll eat anything right now.”

  I sat up, reached into my bag and pulled out a yellow dress, slipped it over my bikini, then stood and reached down for my towel. “Not that I would complain if there were extra olives.” I gave my towel a little flick, then rolled it up and shoved it into my bag.

  He smiled back at me, and to say I was relieved would be an understatement.

  There was hope for our friendship after all.

  —

  I leaned toward Colby as we drove to Jack’s. “Are you mad we took so long?”

  In typical girl fashion, it had taken longer than even I’d anticipated for us to get ready.

  He glanced toward the backseat where Taylor and Matt sat. He kept his voice low, just as I’d done. “No, why?”

  “Well, you’re frowning, like you’re upset or something.”

  He relaxed his expression. “Oh. No, not at all. Didn’t realize I was. I’m just a little tired, I guess.”

  I stared at him, studying his expression as if I could answer my own question just by reading it. He’d seemed fine at his house. We’d eaten pizza with surprisingly little to no weirdness between us, but after we’d gotten changed and into his car, he’d gone quiet. “You sure that’s it? You seem…thoughtful.”

  His mouth cracked into the tiniest smile. “You’re right. Guess I was just thinking about how some things are changing too fast, while others aren’t changing at all. You know?”

  But I didn’t respond right away. He could have been talking about a number of things, but how could I not feel that I was to blame for some of that?

  I didn’t want to bring down our night, nor did I want to take two steps back when we’d finally made some progress, but I had to at least acknowledge his feelings. I nodded my agreement and said, “If any of that is my fault, which I feel as if it might be…I’m sorry.”

  He shook his head. “Isla, I didn’t mean—”

  “Wow, there really is a crowd tonight.” I glanced at him, giving the clear signal the conversation between us was over, then turned to Taylor. “Guess you were right about the singer.”

  “Oh, for sure.”

  “What about the singer?” Matt asked.

  I grinned. “She heard he’s crazy hot.”

  “Yep.” Taylor added, “I bet half the girls in there are here just to check him out.”

  “Hey now,” Matt teased.

  “I said I’d heard. Plus I said half.” Taylor laughed, and quickly added, “But not this half.”

  “This half,” I whispered loudly while pointing to myself.

  Matt and Taylor laughed while Colby did not.

  We parked in the first empty spot we found. Jack’s lot wasn’t that big, and cars were already starting to pull into the vacant lot next door for makeshift parking. We all hopped out and made our way to the entrance. The usual door guy was checking IDs, but just waved us in.

  As if it was second nature, Colby reached back for my hand. It didn’t feel like a friend trying to lead me through a crowd, nor did it feel romantic; it seemed almost like some innate desire to keep me safe as we were swallowed by the crowd. And I more than liked it. I followed closely behind him as we made our way toward the back tables where the guys had said they’d meet us. I was glad they’d gotten there early because we’d never find a place to sit in this horde.

  “Holy shit. He’s divine.” Taylor looked embarrassed as Colby glanced back, like she hadn’t realized he could hear.

  So I got a look at this singer for myself, and well, yeah, it made sense the girls would be going crazy if tight pants and overgrown rock-star hair were their thing. It wasn’t mine.

  Nope. Mine was the guy whose hand was firmly clasped around mine. Maybe it was the beers I’d had with the pizza finally making their way through my body, or maybe it was the heat radiating off the packed dance floor, but suddenly my body was buzzing. I stared at our hands, letting my gaze drift up his arm, across that very chest I’d pressed my nails into only a few nights ago, then slowly lift to his face.

  And when our eyes finally locked, there was no question in my mind. He felt it too.

  Chapter 7

  I forced my gaze away because, damn, if Colby didn’t look like he wanted to drag me back to his place. Not that he’d have to drag me. I’d probably skip the whole way out.

  Of course, the frustrating part of this whole situation was that I’d worked so hard over the last few days to separate myself from all these crazy emotions and now here I was. One little gesture, and my feet were kicked out from under me and once again I was spiraling heart-first into Colby.

  So I had two options: I could work harder to stifle the emotions, which would be no easy task. After all, years of feelings didn’t enjoy being silenced. Or I could embrace them, and see where they led. If Colby let his guard down once, who’s to say he wouldn’t again? And maybe that’s what he needed. Maybe he’d never love me like I loved him, but we could potentially have more than a friendship. And I was okay with that place in the middle. It was better than nothing, and after the way he’d just looked at me, it seemed safe to say he wouldn’t mind this place in the middle either.

  When I finally stole a glance back in his direction, he was watching me. But that let-me-do-bad-things-to-you look was gone, replaced by what looked like anger. Yet even though he looked mad, his grip tightened on my hand as if he had no plans to ever let it go.

  He led me through the swarm to the table where several of the guys had already congregated.

  And as soon as we parted the mass, he dropped my hand and my heart sank right with it.

  Maybe the first look I’d seen was just my own wishful thinking, which was more than just a little depressing. I said a quick hello to the guys, then leaned closer to Taylor so she could hear me over the music.

  “I’m going to go say hi to Landon.” And by that, I meant get a break from the mixed emotions Colby had once again stirred.

  “I’ll walk with you,” she offered.

  “Be right back,” I announced to anyone who actually cared, which clearly wasn’t Colby because he didn’t even glance my way as I departed. Seriously. What was his problem?

  We weaved our way to the bar and though it was packed, I was able to catch Landon’s eye.

  He nodded his head, ignoring the girls vying for his attention directly in front of us, and asked, “What can I get you?”

  “Water,” I shouted back.

  The girls in front of me angled around to get a look at me. I couldn’t decide if the ugly stares were from stealing Landon’s attention or for skipping ahead of the line to order water, though I suspected it was both. I didn’t doubt Landon would serve me a real drink if I wanted one, but I wouldn’t do that to him. I wasn’t a big drinker anyway, no point in putting his job in jeopardy for a beer I’d just end up nursing all night.

  Landon nodded, grabbed a glass then tilted his head toward Taylor.

  I turned to her. “You want anything?”

  She shook her head. “I’m good.”

  Landon raised my glass of water, then motioned to the side where the waitresses loaded their trays, but which was currently empty.

  We squeezed past a group of guys who were already leaning toward obnoxious drunk, and slipped up to the bar.

  Landon handed me my glass. “If you guys need anything tonight, just wave me down or let your waitress know to give the order directly to me. I’ll hook you up.”

  “You’re the best, Landon.”

  He grinned, then glanced at Taylor. She was once again focused on the singer of
the band, who was in the process of a sound check.

  “I can introduce you later if you want.” He nodded toward the stage. “He’s a friend of mine.”

  Her smile widened “That would be awesome.”

  “Yeah, no problem. When he has a break between sets, I’ll bring him over.” He tapped the bar. “Well, I need to get back at it.”

  “I’ll see you later.” With my water in hand, I started nudging my way back through the throng of people.

  I wasn’t a huge fan of crowds, and this was definitely one of the worst. If I made it back to the table in one piece, I had no plans to navigate through this again. It’s not like they were exactly cautious with the height challenged such as myself. Granted, most of the bumps and bangs I received were followed by quick and authentic apologies, but still, I’d prefer to make it out of there with no black eyes. So I kept my head tucked and focused on finding a clear path.

  The mob parted, and I was relieved that I just might be able to make a break for it and arrive back at the table injury-free. But then I realized why. Some guy stood in front of me, parting the masses like freaking Moses.

  Taylor nudged me, not once but twice in the back, and I finally looked up to put a face to the sea-parting skills. And to my surprise it was Mr. Wannabe Rock Star. I stepped to the side as the rest of the group had done—assuming this was protocol—but he moved with me. So I attempted the other direction, but so did he. Dammit. We were stuck in one of those annoying I’m-just-trying-to-get-around-you dances. The best thing to do was stand still and let him move around me. But when I looked up to make it clear I wasn’t moving again, he smiled.

  “I said ‘hi.’ ” His voice was smooth and deep, and caught me slightly off guard. Mostly because it took a second to register that he was, in fact, talking to me. When I made no response, he went on, “To you. I said ‘hi.’ You moved so I tried again…and then again.” He chuckled. “So either you really can’t hear me over my drummer’s warm-up, or you really, really don’t want anything to do with me. Which if that’s the case you can just keep pretending you don’t hear me and move to your right. And I’ll move to mine. Less awkward for everyone involved.”

  He grinned, and okay, he was kinda cute. Still not my type, but attractive enough.

  I smiled back and waved my hand in the direction of the stage. “I wasn’t ignoring you. I really didn’t hear. It’s kinda loud.”

  He leaned closer, like he was sharing a secret, and said, “It drowns out my crappy singing.” Then he straightened back up and added, “And I’m glad your ignoring me wasn’t intentional.” He pressed his hand to his chest. “My ego sincerely thanks you, even if you’re just being nice.”

  Okay, so I was kind of seeing his appeal. I mean, he was no Colby, but he did have a certain charm. “I’m not just being nice. I really—”

  “So I see you met Gabe.” Landon slipped up next to me.

  “Actually, she has yet to tell me her name.”

  I opened my mouth to answer but Landon beat me to it. “This is my friend Isla.”

  Gabe glanced at Landon, then back at me, which suddenly made me remember my friend.

  “And this is Taylor,” I quickly added.

  “Well, it was nice meeting you both.” Gabe smiled, his eyes drifting back to Landon, then returning to mine. “Maybe I’ll catch you before last call. We can have a drink or something.”

  I wasn’t sure if he was talking to Landon or me, so I just nodded and mumbled a quick “Nice to meet you,” then started making my way past him. Which was a challenge again, now that he wasn’t there to part the crowds. But thankfully we weren’t far from our table.

  As we approached it, I noticed several of the guys had vanished, except for Matt who’d been focused on the stage and Colby who looked pissed at the world. Everything in me wanted to comfort him, but lately I couldn’t even do that. But at least I could give him some support by letting him vent.

  I slid into the booth next to him and nudged his shoulder with mine. “What’s up?”

  His body felt tense and didn’t so much as budge in my direction, but his gaze flicked to me. “Nothing much.”

  “Where’d the guys go?”

  He shrugged. “Probably looking for girls, but good luck with Mr. Rock Star working the crowd.”

  I glanced around then to the stage where Gabe was back at the mic, talking with his bassist. “Looks like the floor’s clear for them now,” I teased then nodded to the stage. “He’s done working the crowd.”

  But Colby remained grumpy and didn’t even crack a tiny smile, as he mumbled. “Because you sat down.”

  Wait—was he seriously jealous? Is that what this was? Here I thought he was upset or having a bad night and he was jealous? I bit down on my lip so I would A) not smile, and B) not laugh.

  A week ago a jealous Colby was nothing more than a fantasy. But now it was almost comical. I secretly loved that he had a hint of possessiveness leaking through, but come on, over the wannabe rock star? There was zero competition. And how could Colby not know that?

  I wasn’t sure how to respond, or if I even should, but the music started just then. It was a loud, crowd-pleasing opener that would be impossible to talk over anyway.

  After that song wrapped up they did a quick introduction, then led into another song, but this one had a mellow, body-swaying kind of rhythm. Gabe’s voice was almost hypnotic, making it easy to get lost in the melody. As it drew me in, I found myself slowly sinking into Colby. And as I did, he relaxed as well, our bodies meshing together perfectly. Then the craziest thing happened. His hand settled on my thigh. And I held my breath, scared to ruin the moment with a reaction. But as I became more confident it wasn’t an accident, I slowly exhaled, finally allowing a smile to tug at my mouth.

  A song or two later, Gabe got the crowd amped by engaging them in conversation. He shouted a few questions, received the typical “We’re more drunk than sober” type of answers. But my mind was still fixated on Colby’s hand, so I hardly heard nor cared what Gabe said until I thought I caught my name.

  “So this one is a little something I wrote called ‘Girl Lost,’ and—well, I hadn’t planned to play it tonight, but what can I say? Thanks for the inspiration, Isla.”

  Colby stiffened again, and it was confirmed. Gabe had said my name. Clear as day. I focused my attention on him, not because I’d fallen victim to his charms but because I was baffled as to why this random guy would find me an inspiration.

  I strained to hear the lyrics over the band and the crowd, but only caught bits here and there. Something about a girl looking lost in the crowd, but when he sees her he thinks he’s found some girl he’d dreamt about. But then she disappears and he can’t find her again, even in his dreams. And the chorus changed from the story of a lost girl to the girl he lost.

  The song was okay, and the lyrics were good, but my first thought was bullshit. I’d be willing to bet money that he did this at every gig. He’d meet some girl, claim she inspired his impromptu performance, and sing her panties right off. Fast-forward twenty-four hours and she never hears from him again.

  I shifted to Colby to share my annoyance and theory but froze when I noticed the little tic of his jaw as he clenched it. He shook his head, rolled his shoulder, then leaned back, arms crossed tightly over his chest.

  “Um, you okay there?”

  “Really?” He laughed—completely humorlessly, I might add—then motioned for me to slide out.

  I slid from the bench seat and waited until he was also standing. “What, Colby?” I threw my hands up. “You’re in some sort of pissy-ass mood and acting like it’s all my fault. I’ve apologized for making things weird between us. I’ve tried talking. I’ve tried not talking. I don’t know what you want from me at this point. So please, why don’t you at least fill me in on whatever the hell this is about before you storm off.”

  Matt and Taylor, who’d been wrapped up in their own conversation, turned to face us. Taylor’s eyes widened—yeah,
I wasn’t exactly good at not creating a scene when I got all fired up. But what the hell? Sure there’d been an awkwardness between us, but he hadn’t acted mad until tonight. What changed?

  He glanced around, then his shoulders drooped a bit. “I’m sorry. It’s not you.” Then he left, walking away with no explanation whatsoever.

  I spun around, darting through the crowd to catch up to him. “Colby.” He didn’t stop so I grabbed his arm.

  He glanced back, not looking all that surprised that I’d followed him.

  “No way.” I motioned to the front door. “We talk. Now.”

  Though he didn’t look thrilled by my demand, he followed without any argument.

  We stepped outside and I took a minute to appreciate the silence. My ears readjusted as the bubble of noise I’d been trapped in disappeared behind the doors as they swung shut.

  “Okay, talk.” I firmed my stance and crossed my arms, telling him I meant business.

  And, lo and behold, angry Colby finally cracked…a freaking smile.

  Chapter 8

  Hair whipped across my face as the breeze off the ocean brushed past us, but I kept my arms pressed tightly to my chest as I narrowed my gaze on Colby.

  The more he smiled, the more my temper flared.

  “You look about as threatening as a fly.”

  My arms dropped to my sides, hands balled tightly as I completely lost it. “Colby Callahan, you are by far the most ridiculous guy I know. I’m just…I’m done.”

  Hi grin faded. “You’re mad.”

  I huffed. “You’re mad!”

  “And that made you mad?”

  “Are you kidding—” I rubbed my eyes, then pointed at him. “You. You started this. I did nothing tonight. In fact, here I thought we were good. But then you storm off, we come out here, and you smile.” I threw my hands up. “Freaking smile. Are you drunk? Crazy? A little of both? Because you’ve totally lost me.”

  “I’m sorry. I just—Shit,” he mumbled. “I don’t know what’s wrong with me. I just, well, wish things could go back to the way they were.”