Love Is Forever Blue

by Donalyn Maurer

The next morning, Max wakes me up to tell me he’s going for a run and he’ll be back in about an hour. I grab cup of coffee and walk out to the front porch where I see my grandma sitting on her rocker while she sews a button back on a shirt. I roll my eyes, most likely Jesse's button. I notice there’s a chill in the air and I see she has a shawl around her. I walk back in the house and grab a throw blanket off the couch and wrap myself in it before rejoining her. I sit my coffee down and get situated on the porch swing before taking that first glorious sip.

  “Hey, honey,” she looks up and smiles as she pulls the needle through button hole.

  “Hey, Grandma.” I take a few more sips of coffee as I keep watching her in awe.

  Sewing is not something I do or something I don’t do well. I can sew a button on. That’s about it and even when I do that, there’s usually a gigantic wad of thread behind the button. Nothing but a tangle of thread but that button won’t be going anywhere for a while that’s for sure.

  “So what you doing today, Grandma?” I ask, while still watching her.

  She pulls the needle through a couple more times and then grabs a tiny pair of scissors and cuts the thread. She puts the needle into her apple pin cushion and lays the shirt across the arm of her chair and starts rocking.

  “Me and some of the other ladies are going to help out with the mother’s day out program at church by watching the children and then I think I’m going to stop by Brock and Paige's to see how Callie adjusting. I know they want to give her a few days to get situated before they begin introducing her to everyone as a group. One-by-one, she’ll probably do okay. Just want to be cautious not overwhelm her. Where she came from, with just her aunt, and her mom coming and going...” grandma shakes her head. “Having so many people around giving constant attention could either scare her or she’ll soak it up like a sponge. They want to have a get-together this Saturday. Just something relaxing and laid back. She’s a sweetheart and has really taken to Brock and Paige. She even calls them Mommy and Daddy which really surprised them. They started to talk to her about it but the social worker said she may not totally understand what she’s saying and just to give it time. But from the way she looks at them, she could call them anything and it would be love. She’s a happy little girl. Her life before, someone loved her. Not sure what happened to bring her to us but not going to question the blessing.”

  My heart breaks for what little Cole went through and whatever Callie must be going through now. I can’t wait to meet her. We share a smile because we know they’re all so deserving of each other. This beautiful little girl blessing their lives after the loss of Cole and them blessing her life with all the love they have.

  I look up when I hear a noise and see Max coming up the drive from his run. He’s sweaty and looks hot. I keep my eyes on him as he slows down and rests his hands on his knees and takes a few deep breaths before raising his shirt and wiping the sweat from his face. As he starts stretching a car turns into our drive.

  At first I don’t recognize it. But the more it comes into view, I remember it. It’s Captain Walters and Sergeant Taylor’s police vehicle. I freeze as I watch them exit the car.

  Max, makes his way over to them and at the same time Grandma gets up and walks over to me and puts her hand to my shoulder.

  “Honey, I’m sure everything is fine.” The concern on her face betrays her words.

  I turn back to them and like they sense my anxiety, they all look at me. I watch as Max climbs the steps with Sergeant Taylor and Captain Walters slowly following behind. Waiting for someone to say something has my heart feeling like it’s about to burst from my chest.

  “What’s happened? Did they find Rocky?” I blurt out, needing to end this chapter of my life but Max shakes his head.

  “They have news. It’s about Rocky’s dad. Dr. Jennings.” He pulls me up and to his side. “Let’s go inside.”

  Before heading inside, I approach Captain Walters and Sergeant Taylor, the sadness on their faces tugging at me. I don’t know what’s going on, but I know I owe them my life and I consider them part of my family now.

  “Hey y'all.” Sergeant Taylor gives me a short but strong hug and then I walk down to Captain Walters and put my arm around his waist and he draws me in close and holds me for a few moments.

  “Hey, Jaycee. You look good.” He pulls me back and looks down to me. “Just some news we thought you should know. Everything is okay.”

  I give a small smile and turn and walk back into the house.

  We all sit in the living room. Max and I on the couch and my grandma in her chair as Captain Walters chooses to stand while Sergeant Taylor sits down on the straight back chair.

  Finally, not able to hold it in, I bust out rambling with questions. “Okay, y'all are freaking me out. What’s going on? Did you find Rocky? Is everyone okay?” I ask while looking back and forth between the two of them.

  “No, Jaycee. We didn’t find his body. They gave up the search. I’m sorry. We really wanted to give you and his family closure, but, no, that’s not why we’re here. What we wanted to talk to you about is probably going to shock you. It shocked us.” They share a glance as I continue to sit and wait.

  “We recently received some information from an anonymous source. It contained more information into the life Rocky was leading and more so, why. The source named quite a few people that were involved in drug production and there’s a full investigation underway right now. It’s bigger than we realized. One of the main figures in this is or was Dr. Jennings’.”

  I jerk at the news, not understanding what’s going they’re saying.

  Sergeant Taylor continues. “Apparently, Rocky was taking his orders from him. He’s the one who had Rocky doing his dirty work since his return from the military. This investigation has taken a one-eighty. Nothing is what it seemed. We think this runs deep in and around the area and into Mexico. We’re hearing it wasn’t street drugs, like cocaine and meth, being sold but a new drug. A drug Dr. Jennings was trying to develop along with others. Dr. Jennings wanted to be the next Timothy Leary or something. His position in the hospital gave him access to information and people that he reached out to. He brought them in as benefactors and supporters with the promise of fame. He wanted to reach legendary status and begin developing a new drug. It involves some of our local city government and judges. Elected officials he held in his pocket. That’s how he was able to arrange a midnight bail hearing for Rocky the night he was released,” he finishes.

  They’ve stopped talking and are waiting for a reaction from but I’m dumbfounded. When I finally speak, it’s to confirm what I think they’re saying.

  “So, you’re telling me Dr. Jennings’, Rocky’s dad is some type of drug manufacturer? Mad scientist? He may have judges in his pocket?” I ask.

  “The worst part, Jaycee, we think he was blackmailing Rocky into doing what he wanted by threatening to harm his mom and brother, Lina and Lincoln Jennings.” Captain Walters informs me.

  I start thinking back and I remember something Rocky said to Linc that day in the cabin. “You know what’s funny, Linc? She thinks I’m a monster, the devil himself. But she should really get to know our dad…” My eyes start to water as I remember the night Kelly crashed in yelling during dinner. Dr. Jennings was the one Rocky kept looking to and waiting on for orders. Oh, my God!

  “But, Linc. How did Linc get away? Why did he keep Rocky but not Linc?” I ask in confusion.

  Captain Walters looks down and shakes his head. “Listen, Rocky, no matter what we tell you, the things he did to you, they were wrong, criminal. He hurt people. No two ways about that, but after talking to Linc and Lina Jennings, it seems Rocky may have sacrificed himself in some way. Taking the brunt of abuse and such from Dr. Jennings so his brother and mother could be free. They didn’t know any of this information, but things are starting to make sense. Like with you, right now. Puzzle pieces are starting to fit.”

  I sit still taking all this in and it hits me. “Dr
. Jennings? Where is he? Did the police pick him up? I mean, he’s going to pay, right?” my voice raises; full of anger.

  My grandma chimes in. “He’ll spend time in jail, right, detectives?”

  “Jaycee, Dr. Jennings was found in his office this morning, dead. Murdered. Someone unloaded an entire clip from a 9mm into him and the house had been torn apart. Someone was looking for something,” Captain Walters says. I sit back hard against the couch in shock, my mouth falling open.

  “What the hell?” Max yells.

  “That’s all we know now.” Captain Walters tells him.

  I get up and start to pace as Max and Grandma sit in shock.

  “He’s dead?” I wait for their nod of confirmation. “So if Kelly and Rocky are both dead…I mean, who?” I ask and start to pace again.

  Max pulls me to him and holds me, whispering in my ear. “Love, calm down.”

  I turn on Max. “NO! I won’t calm down. Listen, I get it. Rocky was bad. I know firsthand how bad and he doesn’t get a free pass. He hurt my sister and me. He hurt others. He paid the ultimate price for his sins. But, his dad? I mean, he abused Rocky and Linc, their mom. And he's dead? He doesn’t pay? Who killed him?” I demand, livid.

  Max stands and puts his hand to my shoulder and one to my cheek. “Jaycee, he probably knew too much. If what the detectives are saying is correct and this runs deep as they think, someone probably took him out before he could talk,” Max tells me as he caresses my cheek and smooths my hair, trying to calm me.

  Captain Walters speaks up. “That’s the theory. Someone was nervous about him making a deal and releasing names and eliminated the threat. There was no forced entry and he was found at his desk wearing his glasses. We think whoever it was, he knew and didn’t consider them a threat,” he adds.

  Captain Walters stands and walks to me. “Jaycee, the main reason we came is because this is about to hit the media and it’s going to be a feeding frenzy. You and your sister, your names were never released to the public under victim anonymity protection so you’ll be okay but we just didn’t want you to be blindsided by all of this. Lina and Linc Jennings along with Nick Callaghan are supposed to heading back to Lubbock soon, but I have a feeling they’re not going to be so lucky. I know your sister and Nick are close and you speak to Mrs. Jennings so we just want y’all to be careful.”

  Huh? What? I knew it! Nick and Abigail are more than friends. I look at Max who just shrugs his shoulders. I knew the night at the hospital when he came rushing down the hallway to her room and her waking up and asking for him something was up. I guess I’ll have to talk to her about all that later.

  “Okay. Well, thank you both for letting us know.” I move closer to Max, confusion following me.

  “Yes, thank you for stopping by,” my grandma comes over and shakes both their hands and excuses herself.

  I know what she’s doing, she’s calling my dad and uncles.

  “Okay. I’m okay,” I say and look at Max and then Sergeant Taylor and Captain Walters. “I mean, I’m shocked, but I’m okay,” I clarify after seeing their doubtful glances.

  Captain Walters walks up to me, pulls me into a hug and whispers on top of my head, “Jaycee, there is going to be an end to all this. You’ll see. Soon.” He walks to the door and waits.

  Sergeant Taylor walks up, touches me on the arm. “We'll be in touch.” Max walks them out to the front porch, and they shake hands and say their goodbyes.

  “You okay, love?” he asks as pulls me to sit down with him on the sofa. “Jaycee, just like they said, there will be an end.” He takes my hand and squeezes it. and takes a deep breath. “Maybe, with you or because of you, he wanted to do better, be better but it was just too late. He didn’t know how or didn’t have any good left.” Max tells me and pulls me to sit in his lap. “You bring that out in people. The good. People want to try.” He leans his forehead on mine. “Let him rest in peace with that, okay, love?”

  “Okay, Max.” His words make sense to me. On some level, I know it's the truth; but I just don't have forgiveness in me for Rocky yet. Maybe in time, but right now, he's still the monster in my worst nightmare.

  “I have to head over to my place to pick up some of my stuff and then I’m going by to see my parents. You want to go with me?” he looks nervous while waiting for my answer. “I mean I know you said you need to go by work, but after?”

  I smile because I’d love that. “Yes. Let me get showered. I’ll hurry.” I jump up and start towards our room

  “Okay, take your time. I’m calling my mom to let her know we’re coming.”

  “Okay, sugar bear,” I call back and I hear him chuckle. I start to laugh as I grab a couple of towels and head to the shower.

  On the way to Max’s place, we stop at Dan’s Grocer so I can speak to Nora Lee, my supervisor. When we walk through the doors I realize how much I miss my job, and my co-workers. I hear my name being called and I look over and see Bernice walking over to me. She pulls me into a hug as she apologizes.

  “I’m so sorry, Jaycee. I should have called the police or your family, something.” The agony in her voice twists my heart. She steps back and looks down. “I knew in my gut something was wrong and I just…” I stop her.

  “Bernice, you couldn’t have known,” I say to try and make her feel better. “So please, don’t blame yourself at all, okay?” I pull her back into a hug.

  “Jaycee!” I look up to see a few more of my co-workers who don’t have any customers walking towards me with big smiles.

  “Hi, y'all!” I greet them as one by one they give me hugs. I take a moment to introduce them to Max. “Rachel, Trish, Kim, Debra, Naomi, Ezzat, Amalia, Sylvia, Ralph, Christopher, Nathan, Joey, Mary Joyce, Annette, Dora, Amber and Ryan.” I gesture to Max. “This is Max “Blue” Bradshaw.” He walks forward and shakes each of their hands.

  “Please, call me Blue.” I feel him tap me on my butt with his hand and I can’t help but smile.

  “Jaycee?” My name is called from behind me and I know the voice immediately.

  Nora Lee is one tough cookie. When I first started working here, her no nonsense personality put me off, but now I find its just part of who she is. I can tell she cares about her workers probably more than just a boss should. Anyway, despite her best efforts to keep people at bay by her outer toughness, I’ve grown to love her. I call her sunshine which she thinks is hilarious so when I turn around and see her I can’t help it.

  “Sunshine!” I call out and start towards her. She smiles back but her lip wobbles and her eyes water. She pulls me into a hug.

  “Jaycee, oh, I'm so glad to see you and that you’re okay. I’ve been sending up prayers for you and your family.” I hug her and then we step back.

  “Well, God heard you because I’m doing great.”

  “Of course He heard me.” She scoffs, dragging me towards her office. “Y'all, get back to work and start breaks. Look at the clipboard, your break times are written down.” she calls over her shoulder. A round of “Yes ma’am” from my co-workers can be heard as we walk to her office. She takes her seat behind her desk and waits for us to sit across from her.

  “Nora Lee, this is Max, or Blue I should say. He goes by Blue.” He reaches out to shake her hand

  “Hi, Ms. Nora Lee.” She smiles and even blushes which makes me giggle silently because that’s something new.

  “Hello, Blue,” she says as she collects herself. After a second she turns to me. “So, Jaycee. You ready to come back to us? To go back on the schedule?” she asks.

  I sigh in relief. I didn’t know if it was going to be a problem. I look at her with gratitude. “I’m so ready, Ms. Nora Lee. You have no idea. Thank you for waiting for me,” I say and she smiles but it quickly fades.

  “Well, it wasn’t really my decision. The owners, Dean and Barbie Norris, wanted to wait. You’re a good worker and what happened wasn’t your fault. We all just want you to get better. You’ll always have a place here.” With that news, my eye
s water.

  “Thank you and please, let me them know how grateful I am.”

  “I will, Jaycee. Now, when can you start back up and do you have any restrictions?” She asks and after a short discussion, I get my schedule and we say our goodbyes.

  I’ll be heading back to work in the morning.

  About twenty minutes later, we pull up in front of a huge one story brick home. Max gets out of the car and walks around and opens my door, reaching for my hand. I take it and let him pull me out.

  “Is this your house, Max?” I ask, studying the brick building.

  He looks back at the house. “No. It’s my parents'.” He pulls me to his side and we start towards the front door. “There’s a duplex around back. I’ve been staying between there, the barracks or the hospital. I haven’t really settled into one place but this was closest since coming home from my last tour.”

  I start to panic. I was going to ask him questions about his parents. Get a feel for how or what I should do. I start to pull from him when he looks back to me in question. “Max, I wasn’t ready,” I whisper and I watch as he grins. “I thought we were going to your place and then I was going to ask you a gazillion questions so I’d be ready to meet them.”

  He starts laughing. “A gazillion? Love, that’s a lot of questions.” I nod jerkily.

  “Okay, so here. Let me give you the short version. My dad is prior military and grew up on a farm in the mid-west. He’s your typical average guy. My mom grew up in the Philippines and she misses it a lot. She can talk your ear off about her home. She loves to cook, and well, the minute we walk in the door, she’ll start asking if we’re hungry and whether we say we are or aren’t, she’ll start cooking a huge meal. I always just say I’m hungry because it makes her happy to cook. Both my parents are what I call,” he pauses a moment. “Hippies.” He crinkles his forehead in thought. “Yes, that’s a good name for them. Hippies.”

  Hippies? Okay, so now I’m still worried but also hopeful.

  “Um, they grow most of their own food and…” he stops short when a woman with an accent yells his name.