Fix Me

by Aubry, A

  Putting my hand in his, I smiled as I played along, “Julianna McCall, journalist for the Star Tribune by day, novel writer by night.”

  “Pleasure to meet you, Julianna,” he shook my hand.

  I giggled as I moved towards him a little.

  “How do you feel about kissing right after meeting someone?” His words were exactly as they were the first time we sat on this bench.

  “I don’t know, I’ve never done it,” I whispered as he leaned closer.

  “Me neither.”

  Our lips touched.

  Nearly a week had passed since our big blow out and I had felt like I was going to go insane. I was sexually frustrated so bad that I had nearly bit off Shannon’s head during our weekly section meeting that we had every Friday.

  All the poor girl asked me was how Finn and I were doing, and I almost lost it. Outside of the bedroom, Finn and I were great. We had gone to a few therapy sessions together both because I needed to go to cope with the crap that happened with Michael, but also because I thought Dr. Miller could help us work out the spat that we had.

  While the good doctor did help us with the little issue that we had stumbled upon, she didn’t help the fact that Finn was taking this ‘taking it slow’ nonsense I brought up last Saturday, way too seriously. It had been six days since Finn and I had hooked up underneath the bleachers on the field of TCF Bank Stadium.

  When I proposed that we take things slow, I thought a few days would pass and then we’d back to our normal ways. Hell, we had only known each other not even three days before we had sex the first time. See how bad this frustration was getting?

  To make matters worse, Finn was leaving tonight for Newark, New Jersey to play an away game tomorrow. Currently, we were cuddled up on his couch watching a movie for what felt like the millionth time this week. Dinner was cooked and served, spaghetti with homemade marinara and Italian chicken, and now we were just waiting for the text from Bo telling us that he was on his way to come get him.

  The movie credits rolled on whatever movie we were watching, I stopped paying attention halfway through when Finn started skimming his thumb innocently over my arm. At the rate we were going, I was a ticking time bomb. You are probably thinking, well Julianna, you dingbat, why not just take care of yourself like you did the three years you were with Michael? Well, I’ll tell you why not, because the thought didn’t interest me anymore. Believe me, I tried to drum up a self-induced orgasm, but it was like body denied it, so I gave up.

  It pissed me off the way Finn was so fucking calm. I knew he was dying for sex on the inside just like I was, but he acted as though he was totally fine being celibate. Today was my last shot at getting laid before a long, lonely weekend began. I was desperate to the point of wearing my shortest pencil skirt and the lowest cut business shirt to work today, just because I knew I was seeing Finn after work. He barely even flinched when I pulled the top down just enough when he wasn’t looking so that some of the lace from my bra peeked out.

  Finally, Finn turned to me, smiling as he pushed a loose hair behind my ear. Even the smallest touch right now put all my senses on high alert. Last night, when he ran his hand down my back as he hugged me goodbye at my place, I had to change my moan into a groan and fake that my back was sore from sleeping funny.

  “Bo should be texting me that he’s on his way soon,” he frowned slightly, “What would you like to do until then?”

  Fuck, I knew what I wanted to do but every time I offered it up, he would always say ‘I thought we were taking it slow’. Don’t believe me? Watch this.

  “We could always go up to your room, spend some close time together before you leave,” I smiled innocently.

  Yeah, I even pulled the feigning innocence routine. Told you, desperate.

  “Julianna, you said you wanted to take it slow, remember?”

  Ten points for Gryffindor, aka me.

  I sighed, finally ready to put a stop to this madness. Taking his face in my hands I kissed him hard, pouring every ounce of desperation as I could into it. When I pulled back, I thought I saw a flicker of lust in his eyes, but it was gone before I could check again.

  “Finn, we are going at a snail’s pace here and it’s driving me crazy,” I admitted.

  “I know, but you said you wanted to take it slow. I don’t want to fuck this up again,” he leaned back against the couch, sighing to himself.

  Okay, time to release the inner beast that I had been storing away until I needed to blow up.

  I stood up from the couch and turned to face Finn, my hands on my hips, “Do you or do you not find me attractive in a sexual sense?”

  “Julianna, you know that I do,” he looked up at me, exasperated.

  “Do you or do you not want me?” I could feel my heart start to race under his stare.

  Great, now even his eyes on me were turning me on.

  “I want you,” Finn answered quietly.

  I pointed to his staircase, “Then get your ass upstairs and fuck me already.”

  Damn, I was a demanding little thing. I could see it on Finn’s face that he was having the same exact thought. Well, that, and the lust was back in his eyes the second I told him to fuck me. When he didn’t move, I figured I’d put a suggestion up on the table, one I knew he wouldn’t want to miss out on.

  “Okay then, I guess I will just go up to the bedroom and take care of myself,” I sighed dramatically and turned towards the staircase, about to make my way to it.

  “Over my dead body,” Finn growled as he jumped up from the couch and picked me up, throwing me over his shoulder.

  I squealed and held onto the back of his shirt as he climbed the stairs and went into his bedroom. He pulled me down from his shoulder, my body slowly sliding down the front of his. Finn lifted my shirt over my head and tossed it on the floor, my black lace bra pushing up my breasts nicely. He whistled through his teeth at the sight before he reached around and unhooked it. I pushed the straps down my arms until it joined my shirt on the floor. When he bent down and took one of my nipples in his mouth, I nearly convulsed on the spot.

  As his mouth moved to the nipple that was previously neglected, my back arched as a welcome moan escaped my lips. His hands went down to my skirt, attempting to find the zipper like the first time we had sex. Every time I wore one of these skirts, he failed to find the fucking thing.

  “God damn it, Jules, stop wearing these fucking skirts,” he groaned, his hands circling the waistband over and over.

  I took his hand and guided it to my left side until I felt his middle finger bump into the small, thin pull tab that allowed you to unzip it.

  “Why’s it gotta be so fucking small? I have big hands, they miss tiny things like that,” he whined as he pulled down the zipper.

  “You know where it is now, so shut up and keep going,” I commanded.

  Finn kissed me deeply as he let go of the pull tab and my skirt fell to the floor. His lips trailed down my neck, across my chest, down my torso, until he was on his knees in front of me and my panties were on the floor. My hands grabbed onto his hair as he started teasing my clit with his tongue before sliding it into me. When my orgasm crashed into me thirty seconds later, I flushed with embarrassment. Finn leaned back on his heels and looked up at me.

  “Did you just…” He started laughing before he could finish his sentence.

  I covered my face with my hands, how fucking embarrassing was that? My boyfriend hadn’t touched me in six days and the second his tongue started working its magic, I come. My senses picked up Finn standing up before his hands where on my wrists trying to get me to move them away from my face.

  “Baby, look at me,” he soothed.

  Slowly, my hands lowered down to my sides, but I didn’t say a word.

  “Were you really that pent up?” He asked, his hand caressing my cheek.

  “I’ve been trying to tell you…” I whispered.

  Finn kissed my lips softly, “I’m so sorry.”

  I
grabbed onto his shirt, “Make it up to me now.”

  Pulling his shirt over his head, I made quick work of undoing his pants before pushing them down his legs with his boxers. He stepped out of his clothes and picked me up, gently laying me down on his bed. When he crawled up my body, I couldn’t wait to kiss his lips again. As he spread my legs open for him, I leaned up on my elbows and caught his lips with mine. Large fireworks went off in my head, ones that never ceased to disappear over the last two months.

  His lips were the perfect distraction until he thrust into me, his cock filled me up perfectly. I leaned my head back and moaned at the fullness that I had missed for six straight days. My legs wrapped around his hips as I urged him to continue, his lips moving down to my neck. In no time at all we established a rhythm that brought my orgasm on as though the first time it happened today never actually took place.

  “Finn…” I groaned, my nails scraping against his back.

  “Oh Jules, I love you,” he moaned into my neck, I could feel him getting closer to his tipping point as his cock hardened more in me.

  “I love you too, baby. Fuck, I’ve missed this,” I admitted a little too loudly.

  Finn’s pace quickened as my heart pounded in my chest. My legs were stiffening in their position around his hips. Just as I was about to tip over the edge, Finn’s phone pinged loudly from his pocket and he stopped.

  “You cannot be fucking serious right now,” I groaned as I looked up at him.

  He started to pull out, but I used whatever strength I had in my legs to push his hips. He filled me up all over again.

  “Bo can fucking wait two minutes while you make me come, Finn,” I scolded as I brought his lips back down onto mine.

  Finn groaned against my lips, picking up the pace he had previously stopped before his body took hold and he thrust into me harder. My orgasm slammed into me at a rate I had never experienced before as I cried out in pure pleasure. Finn’s moans joined mine as he stilled, his release pouring into me over and over again. I felt like my eyes were crossed and I would never see straight if I opened them. My breathing was ragged as I tried to get it under control. Finn’s body was flush against mine and I could hear him attempting to catch his breath.

  While the orgasm was mind blowing, we were never going to wait almost a week to have sex ever again. Finn shifted over me and his lips pressed against my forehead. I willed my eyes to open so I could look up at my man. The next few days would be unbearably long without him.

  “I don’t want you to leave,” I whispered as I gazed into his eyes.

  “Then come with me,” he said softly, his forehead resting against mine.

  “What?” Was he crazy? He was going there for work, not play.

  “I bought you a ticket to join me. I’ll pay the hotel for an upgrade to have our own bedroom. Come to New York with me.”

  I raised an eyebrow, “I thought you were going to New Jersey.”

  “We are, but New York is just a quick drive away. You said you’ve always wanted to go there, let me take you.”

  My heart melted to a pile of goo. I suppose there was nothing for me to do but hang out with Angie and our friends. She would completely understand if I went to New York for the weekend with Finn. Then it was decided, I would go with Finn. Oh, shit. I didn’t have anything packed and he would literally be picked up for the airport in less than ten minutes.

  “Babe, I don’t have a bag packed,” I frowned.

  His nose rubbed against mine, “It’s already taken care of. I packed some of the clothes that you’ve left here in my suitcase. Your spare toothbrush is in there as well and, when you weren’t looking last night after you took your medications, I swiped them and brought them home with me. Those are also packed in my suitcase as well.”

  He really did plan this all out. Finn was perfect, have I said that before?

  “I’d love to go see New York with you,” I smiled shyly.

  “I’m so happy you said yes. There is one thing you are missing though,” he said getting up off me and going to his bedside table.

  “Condoms?” I joked as he opened the drawer.

  “Don’t be silly, those were packed when I decided to invite you. If we remember to use them or not is a different story,” he looked back and winked at me before sliding the drawer closed.

  “Then what am I missing?” I sat up.

  “This,” he turned around and dangled the necklace I had torn off a week ago and thrown at him. My one-month anniversary present from him.

  I held out my hands, my smile wide as I opened the clasp and put the necklace on.

  “I would have given it back sooner, but I had to get a new chain for it. The other one broke apart when you tore it off your neck,” he looked down sadly.

  Scooting over to him, I lifted his chin to look at me, “I never should have done that. I’m sorry, Finn.”

  He leaned forward and kissed me, “Don’t be sorry, I hurt you. I deserved it.”

  Finn’s phone pinging loudly again from his pants pocket interrupted the kiss from turning into anything more than a few quick pecks. He reached down and picked it up, Bo was there and waiting. We quickly got dressed and as Finn grabbed the suitcase, I made sure to remember my purse with my ID and we went down to Bo’s awaiting car. Five hours later, we had arrived at the team’s hotel, and just like Finn had promised, he upgraded us to a single room with a king size bed.

  I looked out the window, watching the Passaic River flow as Finn was in the hallway having a quick talk with a few of his teammates. It was probably safe to assume that they were talking about what the schedule was going to be like for tomorrow. As much as I loved Finn and his job, hearing him and his friends talk about work details got kind of boring. The door closed, and I heard Finn walk towards me before his arms wrapped around me from behind. My hands rested on top of his hands as his lips pressed against my neck.

  “Thank you for inviting me, this view is amazing,” I smiled, leaning my head to the side.

  He glanced out the window before going back to kissing my neck, “It’s not as amazing as you are.”

  His hands pulled at my shirt and I decided to have a little fun.

  “What happened to taking it slow, Finn?” I teased quietly.

  Finn’s teeth grazed the soft skin of my neck, “Fuck going slow.”

  Good answer.

  Chapter Nine

  “Oh my god. Finn. Did you know they have a red panda here?!” I practically jumped up and down as I held the map to the Central Park Zoo in my hands.

  “I think Angie might have mentioned your unhealthy obsession with red pandas, panda bears in general, and koala bears,” he chuckled as he wrapped an arm around my shoulders.

  Our morning had consisted of ordering room service for breakfast in bed, visiting the 9/11 memorial and Times Square, before taking a short walk around Central Park. When I saw that they had a zoo, I shouldn’t have been surprised that Finn had already bought tickets online for us to go. He knew me too well. I could never pass up a zoo if they had any type of panda or koala bear. Hell, I couldn’t pass them up if they had adorable sea lions either. Central Park Zoo had both.

  This would be our last stop of the day before Finn had to focus on work until the game. Also known as, the team talks strategies for a few hours before the game began. I guess Finn had gotten me a ticket to see the game tonight, too. It sure beat sitting around at a hotel all by yourself.

  “What do you wanna see first, baby?” Finn asked as I held the map out for him to look at with me.

  “Hmm, let’s see the penguins,” I grinned and pointed at penguin icon at the map.

  “Penguins it is,” he pulled me closer against him and we walked to the Penguin Exhibition building.

  As we made our way around the zoo, many families were around, and I couldn’t help but imagine possibly having a family with Finn someday. How our kids would stare in wonder through the glass as they would watch the penguins waddle back and forth, Finn holding
a child on his shoulders so that they had a chance to see the grizzly bear as he laid on his back in his exhibit. The thoughts made me smile as Finn held my hand while we walked in and out of buildings.

  The sea lion put on a show for bystanders in his exhibit pool, swimming back and forth, and climbing on the rocks that circled his home. When I was done staring at the sea lion like the little children around us, we made the climb to go see the red panda as our last stop in the zoo. I nearly squealed with glee when the adorable little thing was running around its enclosure. The area wasn’t as packed as the other locations in the zoo, probably because it had a steep climb to get to it. But to see how active one of my favorite animals was, made the climb worth it.

  Finn cleared his throat next to me.

  “Are you okay, honey?” I found myself asking.

  He turned to face me, his hand still holding mine, “Yeah, I’m perfect. Did you have fun today?”

  I nodded excitedly, “I had the best day. Thank you so much for bringing me here, for taking me around New York. I know you probably would have rather slept in before your game tonight, but this means the world to me.”

  He smiled, but he looked nervous, “Do you think it could get any better?”

  “Besides you and the Minnesota United FC winning tonight?” I asked, trying to gauge if he was nervous about the game.

  “Yes, besides work,” he chuckled softly. I could practically hear his thoughts ‘always putting others before yourself’.

  “I’m not sure then. Today seems pretty perfect since I got to spend it with you,” I leaned forward and planted a quick kiss on his lips.

  “Then, let’s see if I can make it better,” he said softly as he reached into his pocket.

  I thought he was going to bring out his phone and take a picture with me, like we had been doing for most of the day. But when his hand came out, his fingers were wrapped a small black velvet box. Finn sunk down onto one knee in front of me and my hand instantly covered my mouth. Was this seriously happening? I must be dreaming, this must really be the most vivid dream I had ever experienced. I was going to wake up, and Finn would be sleeping next to me, doing that adorable quiet snore that he does. What? That’s not creepy that I know that he does that…right?