Gentle On My Mind (Reapers MC: Pema Chapter Book 1)

by Bijou Hunter

  “Will you be in danger?” I ask while holding his gaze.

  “Yes.”

  “What happens to me if you die?”

  Maverick doesn’t react to the directness of my question. Not outwardly, anyway. He only runs his fingers casually over the top of my hand.

  “I don’t know,” he says, startling me with his honesty. “It matters when I die. If we’re comfortable in Pema, and you’re safe here, I would suggest you stay. But if we aren’t settled in, you should return to Shasta. If anyone hassles you about your past, have River and Shane kill them.”

  “I don’t want to return to Shasta,” I mumble, thinking of the smell and the house my parents moved into because “it’s bigger than their best friends’ place.”

  “If Pema isn’t safe, Avery will take Io back to Ellsberg. You should go with them. You’ll be able to take college courses if you want.”

  I’ve always felt Ellsberg would be the best choice of the towns Maverick considered. Yet, I’ve never mentioned my feelings to him. How can I sentence Maverick to life in his father’s shadow? The Majors family is closer than mine ever was, but they still have their issues. Maverick needs to create distance from his father and older brother.

  “Do you wish Avery wasn’t moving here?” I ask, changing to another uncomfortable topic.

  “Initially, yes,” he says immediately as if expecting my question. “But she likes you.”

  “I like her, too.”

  “Do you really? Or are you just saying that to appease my temper?”

  “Your temper doesn’t intimidate me,” I say, narrowing my gaze. “I’m very brave.”

  “Yes, but you can be honest.”

  “Your mom doesn’t like me.”

  Maverick’s cool exterior never cracks. “No, she doesn’t, but that’s not on you.”

  “Shelby said Raven’s brain got broken by having so many kids.”

  “I don’t think that’s true, but let’s pretend it is,” Maverick says and then leans over to kiss my cheek. When he pulls away, he gestures with his eyes at the bed. “You seemed worried when Avery mentioned kids.”

  “Back when I was with Husband, I thought I was pregnant,” I blurt out and then lower my voice to avoid waking Io. “I felt the baby moving in my stomach and wanted to cut it out. But I was just gassy or insane.”

  “You were also trapped in hell when you felt that way. Now, you have the choice to say no to sex and babies.”

  “What if I never want any?”

  “I grew up with a house full of kids and noise. My older siblings are already breeding. My friends are racing to make tiny versions of themselves. In Pema, Heidi and Gunnar will have five kids between them by Christmas. Colton probably wants to start catching up to his sisters’ litters. So, if you and I never add to the Reapers’ baby army, I suspect the world will survive.”

  Exhaling roughly, I smile brightly. “I’m not saying I don’t want any, but I might not. Or I might have one and hate it. Well, not the baby. I love kids,” I say and wave toward Io. “If I could snap a baby into existence like a witch, I would have one soon. But there’s more to creating a child than magic.”

  “Adoption is a possibility,” he mentions without missing a beat. “Surrogacy, too. There are ways to have kids that don’t involve you carrying the baby. Or we can enjoy our many nieces and nephews. After all, soon, Savannah will crash our party with her little man.”

  “Thank you,” I whisper, standing and wrapping my arms around his shoulders. “I needed to know the baby thing wasn’t a dealbreaker.”

  “Violet,” he says, tugging me onto his lap, “nothing between us will ever be a dealbreaker.”

  His words set my skin on fire. I lean closer, letting his arms wrap tighter around me. I’ve wanted to kiss him all afternoon, but Avery and Io were around. Then, they weren’t a concern, and I was just chicken. Now, I press my lips against his like I’ve wanted to do for what feels like forever.

  Maverick must sense my hesitancy. His right hand cups my head, reassuring me that he’s in control. I don’t need to take charge or know the answers. I can just enjoy the feel of this sexy man.

  “Keep it in your pants, little bro,” Avery teases as she sneaks back into the room.

  “I was,” Maverick says, licking his lips and acting as if she’s full of crap.

  Avery smirks and whispers, “I watched you two horndogs horndog it up for like a minute without you realizing you had an audience. Thankfully, it stayed PG-rated. I’m not in the mood for a porno tonight.”

  After removing her shoes, Avery steps closer to Io and smiles at her sleeping daughter. Then, she walks to the table, where I remain in Maverick's lap.

  “I hate to wake her, but my angel needs to get up soon,” Avery says and settles into her chair. “I have news.”

  “Is it that Savannah is moving north so not to break her twin contract?” Maverick asks.

  Avery’s smile disappears. “Why would that be good news, dingus?”

  “Then, what is it?”

  “I was talking to the desk clerk, who happens to be the owner. Business ain’t great. I think we should buy the hotel.”

  “Explain.”

  Avery clearly doesn’t approve of how coolly he responded, so she asks, “Where will we put our Ellsberg people when they visit?”

  “At the Holiday Inn,” he says immediately.

  “Where will we live while the firehouse is remodeled?”

  “In an apartment.”

  Avery narrows her eyes, no doubt irritated by how he has a quick answer for her every question. “Or we buy this hotel and turn it into our home base. It can still take reservations for show and tax purposes. A failing business is a nice way to launder money.”

  Maverick glances around the room. “You want to live in this place for at least six months?”

  “Sure. There’s a kitchen downstairs and plenty of rooms. It’s also not far from our future home, and we can walk to two parks.”

  Maverick’s green eyes narrow. “Let me ask you again, do you really want to live in this gaudy nightmare?”

  “We can fix it up easy. Throwing down new carpet can be done over a weekend. Of course, we’ll keep the vibrating beds. Otherwise, we can make it work. Plus, we’d all be together. While you’re working, Violet, Io, and I could chillax here.”

  Maverick’s demeanor changes ever so slightly at this suggestion. He worries about me being alone. I don’t blame him. My issues are like a horror movie’s jump scares. We know they’re coming, and we can prepare. But the experience is still jarring.

  “Owning this downtown hotel,” I mumble, feeling on the spot for no reason, “is a visible sign of your money and power. Is that good or bad?”

  The siblings glance at each other, and Avery smirks.

  Maverick hides his feelings and says, “The more the Reapers own, the more power we have against the new mayor and his backers. We ought to hit up Cooper for how he feels about the purchase.”

  “Shouldn’t you ask Colton first?” I ask while sliding my hand into Maverick’s.

  Avery frowns. “I keep forgetting he’s president. No way am I kissing his ass.”

  “I’ll do it,” I say, and they frown at me. “What do I care? I spent most of my life faking shit. I can do it, so you don’t have to.”

  Avery leans over and hugs me. “If you distract his ass, so I don’t have to kiss it, I’ll make sure to help you out. I promise, and my word is good.”

  Maverick’s gaze softens. “Avery will do right by you.”

  This is officially the moment I feel as if I’ve joined the Majors team. Early on, Avery intimidated me. No doubt, she didn’t know what to make of my broken brain and ugly past. In all honesty, I took forever to figure out the difference between Avery and Savannah. We had all the ingredients to be enemies. Instead, Avery and I have become real friends.

  Now, the three of us can stand together against threats and work as one to solve problems. Moving to Pema will be effo
rtless, and I’m ready to start packing.

  THE SENTINEL

  The second visit to Pema sets a lot of new plans in motion. I have no doubt we’ll get the go-ahead on the hotel purchase. Cooper likes for the club to own shit. In Ellsberg, rather than protection money, we have a little piece of everything. Need a loan? The club will toss you some cash. But even after you pay, you’re in our book as allies. Don’t let us down, or you’ve broken our trust. Eventually, everyone in Ellsberg is at least partially owned by the club. Therefore, if the Reapers go down, we’ll take everyone with us.

  But that’s not how Pema works yet. The chapter owns a few bars, restaurants, and a coffee shop. A dry cleaner and a laundromat, too. But except for the Chinese-Thai place, nothing new has been added to the books for a while. Heidi struggled to branch out while squeezed by crews in Louisville and business interests just over the Indiana border. She needs more muscle, but there’s nowhere to house them. Now, we have the fucking mayor and his preacher brother.

  So, yeah, Cooper will approve the hotel purchase. Soon, too. We need to start snapping up approvals on shit before the mayor realizes the Reapers are in the game.

  I plan to discuss these issues with Colton during dinner at Heidi’s place. Tonight’s meet-and-greet won’t involve the entire club, just the Ellsberg transplants.

  Years ago, when she and her older brother moved to Pema, Heidi bought herself one of the nicer houses. The market’s always been tight. Heidi got lucky to find a home inside town with good bones and a decent-sized yard. Years later, her brother took a piece of land near their parents’ place and stuck a swanky double-wide on it.

  At Heidi’s updated farmhouse, we park Avery’s SUV behind Gunnar’s. Violet puts on her “Happy Wife” persona she learned from her parents and then honed with O’Meara. I know she’ll soon smile easily and offer effortless chitchat.

  In contrast, Avery doesn’t give two shits about impressing any of these people. She’s known them all her life. Meaning, they’re well aware of how she doesn’t give two shits about their opinions.

  Io’s wearing the same pout she woke up with earlier. Avery made the mistake of taking a piss at the exact moment her kid’s eyes opened. Finding herself alone in the weird hotel room, Io wailed in horror. We could hear her from the next room. Violet ran over. By the time we entered, my sister’s bladder was empty, and her arms were full of a crying toddler.

  Hours later, Io still holds a grudge.

  “Look at all these blonde fucks,” Heidi announces as she exits the house to her wide, walkaround porch. Barefoot and wearing a knee-length flowered dress, she looks like a normal suburban mom. The toddler on her hip completes the image. Then, she opens her mouth, and I’m reminded of how she ran this chapter for years.

  “I’m not kissing your ass,” Heidi tells me while her pigtail-wearing daughter smiles at Io. “You’ll never be my boss.”

  “We’ll see,” I mutter as a warning shot that she won’t have the same kind of fun fucking with me that she no doubt does with Colton. “This is Violet.”

  Heidi is a royal bitch. She literally waves as if she’s the Queen of England. As kids, our families—along with the Johanssons and Campbells—would have day-long feasts at Cooper’s place. All the kids would run around, breaking into smaller groups. And in the midst of it all, Heidi was always screaming at people. She might have shut up if other girls didn’t also enjoy swinging around their ovaries and talking shit. The grown-up version of one of those girls currently eyeballs Heidi.

  “I don’t work for you,” Avery tells Heidi. “Don’t try bossing me around, or I’m punching you.”

  “I’ve got your number, Thing Two.”

  “If we throw down, I’m tearing out your extensions.”

  “This hair is real, fart weasel,” Heidi hisses as her hand reflexively touches her shiny brown hair.

  The women’s feud awakens a pouty Io, who now glares at Heidi. “Nu-uh.”

  “Tell your baby to stop talking shit to me,” Heidi growls

  “Never. Io must express herself, or else her life has no meaning. Tell your baby to stop being so fucking charming,” Avery grumbles as Onyx bats her big brown eyes. “She’s showing up my sweet angel.”

  “I may never want kids,” Violet announces and walks past them. “Especially after today.”

  Smiling, I follow her onto the porch. We head toward where music plays and food burns on the grill. Heidi and Avery will likely spit fire at each other for a while. I’m glad Violet ditched that scene. Her confidence shines in Pema.

  I slide my hand around hers as we reach the backyard’s fence. A small black-and-white dog runs over and growls menacingly. Then, a larger white dog arrives, wagging its tail. A chunk of tanned muscles and tattoos whistles for the dogs to back off. Jox waves us back to where he’s burning shit with Gunnar.

  The two men look like typical enforcers. Jox is a pretty boy with a buff body and an empty brain. Gunnar is the mumbling shy guy to his sister’s bossy bitch.

  Back in the day, the dark-haired brawler looked like his attractive parents, but too much cage-fighting left the bridge of his nose wider and his cheekbones off-kilter. Despite his bruiser appearance, Gunnar’s the softest member of the O’Keefe clan. Even his mom is more of a ballbuster.

  But some of Gunnar’s current pussification comes from being happily married with two kids and one on the way. My dad was probably much scarier before babies started flying out of my mom’s vagina. Parenthood doesn’t change everyone, but I don’t trust people who stay the same. My dad lost a little of his edge on account of loving someone more than himself. That’s how Gunnar is, and I won’t knock him for losing a step over the years.

  “This is good shit,” Gunnar mumbles after I introduce Violet to his wife, Vidalia, aka Vi. “Our families stand together in Ellsberg. Glad it’s you joining us in Pema rather than some fuck I don’t know.”

  Nodding, I don’t feel the need to make idle chitchat with Gunnar. He understands how I work. I’ll never be the one to rally the troops. I’m the guy who smiles to your face and then stabs you in the back later. And you’ll never see me coming.

  Violet’s much better at winning over people. Nearby, I hear her chatting up Vi. The pale, freckled redhead isn’t as shy as Colton’s woman, but she’s nowhere near as mouthy as Heidi. Vi’s gentle but no pushover. Especially after spending the last few years with the O’Keefe family, who value ballsy women.

  Violet is an ace at adjusting to different personalities. She’s passive around Avery. More assertive with Stella. Currently, she’s hit a middle point with Vi, who mentions how similar their names are.

  “No one who matters will be confused about who is who,” Violet explains while getting comfy on the ground with Gunnar’s two kids, Shawn and Cassie. “The other people are likely confused a lot in life, which really isn’t our problem.”

  Vi smiles warmly, seeming relieved about the newest member of the local group. I suspect she worried about how Violet and Avery would fit into the current situation. Heidi and Gunnar have been alone in Pema for years. This place belonged to them. Now, Colton and I will be calling the shots. So, despite all the laughter about burning meat and cooing over the kids, I sense the tension.

  Bringing his ego to the party, Colton’s arrival only amps up the unease. I’m accustomed to dealing with such men. Arrogance gushes out of River. In Ellsberg, Colton never needed to hide his power or worry about watching his mouth. I catch Heidi giving him the side-eye when she finally appears with Onyx, Avery, and Io. My sister walks over and tells Stella hello while ignoring Colton. Of course, my sister would be the first one to whip out her figurative dick and start a measuring contest.

  After growing up with three sisters, Colton is accustomed to bossy women. He lets their attitude bounce off him, or he grosses them out with farts. That won’t work with Avery or Heidi. Charm isn’t cutting it, either. These women’s fathers murder the people his father sentences to death. They won’t be impressed by him wi
nking at them or asking if they’ve lost weight.

  “What will you name the hotel?” Colton asks after Avery explains her plan.

  “That’s the first thing you want to know?”

  “It won’t still be The Love Cave, right?”

  Avery nearly sneers before muttering, “Of course not.”

  “Then, what will you name it?”

  “I don’t know.”

  “Figure it out and text me,” he says, walking past her and toward the grill where more meat gets ruined. “What's happening here?”

  Avery glares at the back of Colton’s head, but he doesn’t care. She then turns her angry eyes to me. I don’t give a shit, either. Finally, she glares at Violet, who shakes her head disapprovingly over Colton’s behavior. After receiving the feedback she requires, Avery settles down and coaxes Io to play with Cassie, Shawn, Onyx, and Heidi’s older son, Axe. Though my niece is curious about the toys they’re playing with, she gets intimidated and starts crying until she’s back in Avery’s arms.

  Violet surprises me by leaving Vi and Stella to go sit with Avery and Io. My sister is exhausted from Io’s clinginess, but she can’t stand to be mean to her child. Our mom promises crying won’t kill Io.

  “She’ll get over it,” Raven announced last Christmas.

  “I never did,” Avery hissed. “I still remember when you abandoned me.”

  Of course, Avery was playing her usual games. She can’t stand bowing to another person’s will. I don’t know why she ever thought Bran and her would work, even if he hadn’t bailed. The only person she’s ever been truly weak with is the child in her arms.

  But that doesn’t mean she isn’t overwhelmed—a fact Violet picks up on. When Io stops crying, she stares at the playing kids. With a little effort, Violet sweet-talks the girl into her arms, though Io keeps an eye on her mom.

  “We’ll play together,” Violet promises as she walks with a whiny Io to the sandbox where the other kids babble.

  Avery literally holds her breath as Violet sits down and gets Io to focus on the toys rather than the kids. More than once, the child looks back to check for her mom, but she does eventually calm down enough to play with the dolls. When Avery’s gaze meets mine, we don’t need to say a word. I feel her relief at having help from someone who isn’t Savannah. Plus, she understands how much I need Pema people to love Violet in the way she’s loved by Shelby back in Shasta. Together, we’ll make this new life work.