To Have and to Trust (Heart of a Highlander Collection Book 1)

by Allie Palomino

  “I love ye, baby. And I will care for ye, despite yer father not wanting to.” She rubbed her tummy. “Aye. ‘Tis just ye and I, little one. Together we shall see this through.”

  The next morning, Andie and Meghan ate as if it was their last meal. As servants and soldiers passed them, their wide-eyed looks were focused on the two women and the small feast before them.

  Andie was eating porridge and Meghan took a big bite out of a wedge of cheese, when Gabriel and Gavin walked in. Their eyes rounded with astonishment.

  “D’ye want a leg of lamb as well, with yer loaves of bread and kettleful of porridge?” Gabriel asked. Immediately, he backed away. The women gave him a stare that would have melted snow.

  “I believe ye shouldna have said that, for they’re eyeing ye as if ye are the leg of lamb,” Gavin said, laughing. He sobered up when they fixed the same stare on him.

  “How do ye feel, sweeting?” Gabriel asked, walking over to his wife and rubbing her back.

  “I feel well, just famished.”

  “Aye, I can see that.” Meghan fixed her husband with another sobering stare.

  “Andie, what excuse d’ye have for eating enough food for a liege of men?” Gavin asked, smiling.

  She looked at him as she swallowed. She looked over to Meghan as tears began to fill her eyes.

  Emotional. There she was being damned emotional again.

  She began sniffing immediately, but couldn’t help it. They hadn’t spoken since the argument they’d had when Meghan and Gabriel left, and now, the only thing he had to say to her was a rude and disparaging comment?

  Both Gabriel and Meghan glared at Gavin. Gavin looked at them and felt regretful. His guilt increased when he looked back at Andie.

  She pushed back her chair while tears streamed down her blushed cheeks. When her gaze met his, she hurriedly lept out of the chair and ran outside. The nearest chamber pot was upstairs and she wouldn’t have made it. Confused, Gabriel, Gavin, and Meghan watched Andie as she ran. Then they heard Andie.

  The retching noises made Meghan green. She placed a hand over her belly. “Oh, no,” she said softly and rose to go do the same.

  Gabriel and Gavin stayed back. Gabriel scratched his head and Gavin just stood there. They heard the sounds of both women retching. It was almost as if the sound of one made the other heave more.

  “‘Tis all yer fault, Gavin.”

  “Aye, I know it. I told ye she canna stand the sight of me.”

  “For crying out loud, Gavin, ye insulted the lass.”

  “Aye, but ye did the same to Meghan,” Gavin said, brooding.

  “Yes, but Meghan is my wife and I do it often; she’s become accustomed to my jests. Ye told me that ye hadna spoken to Andie since Meghan and I left. Doona ye believe that yer words would be harsh for her ears? Not to mention that women get a mite touchy when men remark on the weight they’ve gained.”

  “Aye, ye’re right, Gabriel. I should apologize.”

  Gabriel’s surprised gaze rested on his brother. “Ye? Apologize?”

  “Aye,” Gavin said simply.

  Red-faced and sick-looking, Andie and Meghan came back in. Andie’s face still had remnants of tears. Gavin and Gabriel walked towards them, both with water. Meghan took the water from Gabriel, muttering a thank you before she drank.

  “Are ye alright, sweeting?” he asked soothingly.

  Meghan scowled and looked up at him. Gabriel could still see the annoyance in her gaze.

  “Aye,” she responded coldly.

  “Andie?”

  She was heading towards the stairs. Andie had ignored Gavin’s outstretched hand that contained the water. She stopped when she heard her name but didn’t turn around to face him.

  “I’m sorry for saying what I did.”

  Clarisse and Edie, who were passing by at that precise moment with folded laundry piled chin-high in their precarious grasps, stopped and gaped. Harold and Shaun walked in at that same moment and heard his apology. Their faces mirrored their shock. Meghan took hold of Gabriel’s forearm, stunned.

  “I shouldna have said that.”

  Andie didn’t turn around but nodded, and continued to the staircase disappearing as she made her way up to her room. Gavin turned around and found his audience gaping at him. He ignored them and spoke to Meghan.

  “Meghan, I am very pleased that I shall have a niece or nephew. My deepest congratulations.”

  Gavin could hear audible gasps.

  “Thank ye, Gavin. We are verra excited,” Meghan said, instantly beaming. His apology had more than made up for his rudeness in her eyes.

  He wasna a bad mon afterall, she thought. If only Andie could see it.

  Gavin nodded and left to go outside.

  “I am going to see Andie now, and make sure she’s alright.”

  Gabriel kissed Meghan and watched her ascend the stairs. He grew increasingly frustrated with Gavin. If only he’d tell Andie he loved her once and for all!

  “I told ye, Meghan, that he hasna a nice word to say to me.”

  “Oh, Andie. He was jesting.”

  “Jesting! Meghan, he was cruel.”

  “Ye’re just emotional because ye’re carrying and because ye’ve gained weight. I said much the same about ye, yet ye werena angry at me.”

  “That’s because I know that ye are my best friend and I know ye were being honest and nay cruel.”

  “Andie, I doona think-”

  “Meghan, I would really like to nap right now. I am verra

  tired.”

  Meghan looked at her intently and nodded.

  ”I’ll leave ye then, but I willna let ye hide under a rock,

  Andie.” Meghan opened the door and left.

  “Gavin, ye are a stubborn arse and ‘tis time I told ye so.”

  “‘Tis time? Ye never stop telling me that.”

  “Ye love her, Gavin, and she loves ye. Stop the foolish games between ye. Lord, but I tire of the games between ye two.”

  Gavin shook his head. “Gabriel, ye are a superior warrior, but ye arena a match-maker or wise in the ways of love,” Gavin said, the word coming out as if a blasphemy. “There is nay love between Andie and I.”

  Gabriel stood there while Gavin stalked off. This was ridiculous, he thought. Something needed to be done to get these two together. He went in search of his lovely wife.

  Chapter Twelve

  The last two days, Andie had refused Meghan’s request to supper downstairs. She told Meghan that she always ate alone, unless Riley ate with her. Meghan had then tried to guilt Andie into coming down.

  “Andie, we’ve not seen each other in three months. Canna ye just supper downstairs?”

  Andie shook her head, yawning. She was lying in bed, which as Meghan had found out, was what Andie had been doing for the last couple of weeks since she began to tire easily.

  “I doona want to go down there, Meghan. I have already told ye that I spend most of my time in my room, especially within the last weeks. I tell them a story and I come up.”

  “Andie, ye’re being purposefully stubborn. Ye doona want to dine with us because of Gavin. Both of ye are a stubborn heap of rocks.”

  Andie gasped and Meghan nodded succinctly, crossing her arms across her chest.

  “Meghan, I doona believe ye just said that! Me? Me? A stubborn heap of rocks? It is Gavin, not I!”

  Meghan pursed her lips in a manner that mirrored her exasperation. “Fine, Andie. Stay here and sulk.”

  Without further hesistation, much to Andie’s surprise, Meghan walked to the door and exited.

  This was repeated the day after and still Andie would refuse to go downstairs for supper. So, again, it was Gavin, Bryce, Gabriel, and Meghan supping. Gavin stood when he finished, as did Bryce. They planned on discussing strategy to overcome Alistair McBride. They’d all been informed as to when Liam would return home. Unfortunately, it was not good news.

  Andie had yet to be informed and all of them were reluctant to tell
her. Gabriel and Meghan remained at the table and slowly got up together.

  “Are ye ready for bed, sweeting?”

  She nodded her head. “Aye.”

  Together they made their way upstairs. Meghan was undressing and Gabriel had asked her a question, which she hadn’t heard.

  “Meghan?”

  She began to comb her hair, staring into the hearth’s fire.

  “Meghan?” Gabriel asked, this time touching her shoulder. Her pensive and serious face relaxed as her brown eyes settled on troubled emerald ones.

  “What’s the matter? Ye look troubled,” she said to him.

  He sighed, a sign he was growing impatient.

  “I’ll ask ye the same question. Since the night we arrived here, ye’ve been lost in thought more times than not. Something is troubling ye and I want to know what it is. I’ll not have ye upset.”

  Meghan walked over to the trunk and placed her comb on it. She sighed and sat down on the large bed. The grey wool quilt felt slightly rough as she passed her hand over it. She looked around slowly. This had been Gabriel’s room. The stone walls were a cool grey color. The massive bed was a good fit for Gabriel’s large frame. A trunk was at the end of the bed.

  Gabriel stood with his legs braced apart and arms crossed over his chest. There his wife sat, lost in thought again.

  “Meghan?”

  She looked up as if surprised he were there.

  “Yes?”

  He let out an annoyed breath. “What is the matter with ye?”

  “Not a thing, Gabriel, why?”

  “Meghan, ye wear a mon’s patience thin! Ye’ve nay been paying any attention. What has ye so pensive?”

  Meghan shrugged. “If ye were Gavin’s first in command, and ye have a holding, how can ye both serve him and maintain yer holding?”

  He pursed his lips in annoyance, knowing that was not what was bothering her. “I spent the majority of the time here with Gavin. James maintained the holding. I would return every month to make sure things were orderly,” Gabriel said. James was his own first in command.

  Meghan nodded slowly and then relaxed down in bed. He watched as she settled into the bed, and waited, for it usually took a good while before she was comfortable. He counted to fifty slowly and sure enough, she lay still and began to sleep.

  He was not going to let her sleep, though.

  “Meghan, ye will nay so easily get away with not telling me what has ye bothered.”

  Meghan sighed. She had grown used to that tone and knew it very well.

  “Tell me.”

  She sighed again and sat up, her hair in slight disarray.

  “I’m concerned for Andie.”

  “That is fairly obvious. What else?”

  She sighed and looked at him. She was very troubled and his concern increased. He cupped her cheek and looked tenderly at her. “Ye know that ye can tell me anything, sweeting. I will always protect ye.”

  She began to cry and he brought her into his arms. “Doona cry, Meghan.”

  “Ye’re so wonderful, Gabriel, and I should have told ye the truth!”

  His heart stopped, wondering what she was talking about. “Truth about what?”

  She was incoherent with her crying. He managed to hear ‘the baby,’ and grew concerned.

  “Did something happen to the bairn, Meghan?” he asked, his voice thick. She looked up at him and saw the sadness there. She hurriedly shook her head.

  “Nay, not our bairn. Our bairn grows and thrives within, though I’ve still to feel him move,” she said and saw relief flood Gabriel’s eyes. “It’s Andie.”

  “Andie? What has she to do with our bairn?”

  Meghan looked pointedly at him. He waited for her to continue for now she was very serious.

  “Not our bairn, Gabriel, but hers.”

  Gabriel sucked in his breath sharply. “Meghan, Andie is carrying?”

  She let more tears fall. “Aye! And I knew I should have told ye but I’ve been torn. She asked me nay to tell Gavin and I havena, but I canna keep the truth from ye. He should know that she is carrying. She made me promise nay to tell him, but she didna make me promise nay to tell ye.”

  He smiled. His wife was clever. “Aye, verra intelligent, Meghan.”

  She smiled and gave a small laugh.

  “How long has she known?”

  “She didna know until the evening when we arrived. She thought she was ill and depressed. Then she began telling me of her symptoms and they sounded much like my own.”

  Gabriel was taken aback. How would Gavin react? “She looked as if she’d gained a lot of weight. How far along is she?”

  She looked conspiratoriously at him. She blushed and he wondered what she was about to say. “Andie said that he would never…umm…finish…in her, that is, and well…she believes that…umm…that the bairn was conceived when he was ill with fever. He would finish…in her.”

  That was it, Gabriel thought. He remembered that time well. Gavin had been out of his mind, almost strangling her to death, leaving bruises behind.

  “That was four and a half months ago. She doesna look overly big.”

  Meghan nodded her head. “Aye. Well, she told me that the embarrassment over her gain has made her hide the weight in looser dresses. Trust me Gabriel, she is verra large.”

  He nodded his head and she continued.

  “She is so sad, Gabriel. She truly believes Gavin loathes her and that he would nay love the bairn, for he’s said he never wishes to marry or have another child. She says she feels alone and is so miserable, I fear for her,” Meghan said, her voice ending in a painful whisper.

  He brought her closer to him again and kissed her forehead. “I will take care of this matter, sweeting. Doona worry yerself over it any longer.”

  “What will ye do?” She was relieved she no longer shouldered the burden alone.

  “Ye doona worry about that. Sleep for now, Meghan,” he said soothingly.

  “We’ve a need to talk,” Gavin said to Andie. She was seated at the table enjoying a quick snack. Meghan was taking a nap.

  Andie sighed, hanging her head down to gather up steam and gumption. Did he know about the bairn? She felt her heart rate accelerate.

  He sat down across from her, taking note again of the shadows beneath her eyes that signified her exhaustion. Her face had filled out, also, and she looked genuinely sad. When he spoke to her, she jumped, which had him wondering why.

  “I think ye know what I’m about to say. We both doona want to hear it.”

  She looked up in alarm. He knew! Panic almost began to seize her as she thought about what she would say in response.

  “What?” he asked, seeing the reserved panic in her eyes.

  “Gavin, just say what ye’re wanting to say.”

  He sighed and leaned back in his chair, observing her. He would let her near panic go for now.

  “News from Liam arrived-”

  “When?” she hurriedly interrupted. She was both anxious to hear what he was about to say, and relieved that her being with child was not the subject.

  “When Gabriel arrived.”

  She looked sharply at him. “Ye’ve waited this long to tell me?” Her tone was angry.

  He sighed. “Andie, we needed to discuss the status of the McAryll battle. ‘Twas no more than a couple of days ago, so doona act as if ye’ve gone weeks without this information.”

  Her eyes were shooting daggers at him. “Who’s we?”

  “Gabriel, Bryce, Charlie, Shaun, and I.”

  “Why wasna I in that meeting?” she asked, cursing her voice as it trembled, not from sorrow, but rage.

  He saw her cheeks redden and knew it was a sign that she was very angry. “Calm yerself, Andie. Doona get so angry.”

  “Why wasna I told?” she repeated angrily again.

  “Ye were sulking in yer room as usual,” Gavin said, his own anger heightening.

  She let out a slow breath and pursed her lips.

&
nbsp; “Quit pouting,” he goaded her, wanting her to release her anger. He figured if he pushed her far enough, she would finally tell him what was bothering her. All the anger and emotions she was hoarding couldn’t all be directed at him, could they?

  “Out with it, Gavin,” she said, holding tight to her temper.

  “The McArylls are completely and utterly inept and bloodt incompetent. They’ve lost more than half their men. This is taking much longer than we anticipated, Andie. Much, much longer.”

  Her heart constricted. “How much longer?”

  “Four more months, they estimated.”

  She sprang to her feet. “Four months!” she shouted. He grimaced in reaction, hating to see her so upset.

  “Settle down, Andie.”

  “Settle down?” she yelled. “Nay! I’ll nay settle down! My clan is being butchered and abused. My family’s death is unavenged! Nay! Nay, Gavin, I’ll nay settle down!” Her voice crescendoed with every word.

  He stood up, now angry.

  “They will be avenged! The McArylls must be helped first.”

  “The McArylls, the McArylls,” she mimicked. By now, they had an audience. Both were unaware of this, however, as they glared at one another.

  “Andie,” he warned.

  “Nay! When are ye going to help me and mine? My clan is suffering. Did ye forget he took yer son? If ye doona give a damn about me, what about Riley? I found him in a trunk! When are ye going to avenge that, Gavin? I at least thought that insult wouldna go unnoticed.”

  His eyes began glowing.

  “Oh, now yer eyes are glowing. Oh, would ye please! When are ye going to defend what’s yers, even if ye disregard what my clan and I need?”

  He slammed his hand down on the table hard. Unable to withstand this last clap of anger, the table groaned and fell apart. The audience gasped, though the two didn’t notice.

  “Doona ye dare question my loyalty to my son!” he roared.

  “If ye were more a mon, I’d nay question it!”