Going on Red

by Lyn Gardner

  “If you’ve supposedly changed like you say you have, then why in the hell did you turn down my offer to drive you to the doctor—eh? I’ll tell you why, Kate, because you didn’t want to have to dream up some stupid excuse for me to stay in the bloody car.”

  Kate leaned back. “That’s why you were upset this afternoon?”

  “And for the life of me, I don’t know why. It’s not like I wasn’t already used to you treating me like a leper.”

  “Brodie, I said I’d call a taxi because I thought I’d monopolized enough of your time. I showed up unannounced on Friday night, and you’ve taken care of me ever since then. You’ve fed me. You made sure I was taking my meds. Hell, you even washed me and shaved my legs, for Christ’s sake. I was just trying to give you a bloody break.”

  Without saying a word, Brodie pulled out the tray of chicken and put it on top of the stove. “This needs to sit for a few minutes.”

  “Brodie, just give me a chance—”

  “You know what, Kate,” Brodie said, tossing the oven mitts aside. “Giving you another chance is right up there with giving you more time. It’s the same old, same old.”

  “Then take me to the doctor on Friday, and I’ll show you I’ve changed.”

  “It’s too late for that.”

  “No, it’s not, Brodie. I can’t prove to you what you need to see if we aren’t out and about. I can’t do it here,” Kate said, waving her arms about. “But I can do it out there. Just give me a chance.”

  Brodie bowed her head and closing her eyes, another mental tug-of-war invaded her mind. How many chances were too many? How much time was too much? How long would it take for the dreams to stop? Brodie opened her eyes and looked at Kate. “I don’t know if I have the strength to do this again, Kate. I just don’t think—”

  “Would it help if I put it on a bloody billboard, let everyone know that Kate Monroe is head over heels in love with Brodie Shaw, because I’ll do that Brodie. I’ll do anything you want,” Kate said, her voice cracking with emotion. “Just give me until Friday, Brodie. It’s just a couple of more days. I’m begging you. I’ll even get down on my knees if that’s what you want. Just say the word, and I’ll do it.”

  Brodie wanted to laugh, and it had nothing to do with Kate’s offer. It had to do with love and the things you thought you’d never do…again. “You wouldn’t be able to get back up if you did.”

  The flicker of mirth in Brodie’s eyes was impossible not to notice, and Kate dared to take a breath. “So…um…does that mean…does that mean you’ll give me until Friday?”

  “You do know that if I agree to this, it makes me certifiable—right?”

  Kate shrugged. “From where I stand, what some people define as normal is way overrated.”

  Chapter Thirty-Three

  Brodie came out of the bathroom to find Kate grimacing as she stood by the bed wearing nothing but her underwear. “Something wrong? You’re making one of those faces again.”

  “I haven’t worn a bra since the accident and…um…it’s kind of hurting.”

  “Then take it off.”

  “And go braless?”

  “Kate, you’re going to a doctor. I’m fairly certain he’s seen tits before.”

  “Yeah, but…”

  Brodie snickered. “Let me guess. It’s not you?”

  Kate cast the evilest look she owned in Brodie’s direction and sliding the bra straps down her arms in record time, Kate whipped the bra around to undo the hooks and then tossed it on the bed. “I’ll show you what’s not me,” she said, reaching for the long-sleeved T-shirt on the bed. A second later, Kate paled. “Fuck.”

  “Christ,” Brodie said, trotting over. “Are you o—”

  “Don’t,” Kate said, holding up her finger. “Don’t say a word. Just help me put this bloody thing on.”

  Brodie pressed her lips together to smother her grin, and after assisting Kate in getting the shirt over her head, Brodie backed away while Kate straightened the fabric. “Um…Kate.”

  “Yes?”

  “I know you said you’ve changed, but I’m thinking you haven’t changed so much as to allow yourself to leave the house like that,” Brodie said, pointing to Kate’s chest.

  Kate looked down, and her eyes bulged. Two certain somethings were at full attention and pointing back at Brodie like tiny arrows through the snug shirt. “Oh, crap. I can’t wear this. Get it off.”

  “Put it on. Get it off. Make up your bloody mind,” Brodie said with a laugh as she helped Kate out of the clothing. “And can I make a suggestion?”

  “Sure. What?” Kate said, folding her arms across her naked breasts.

  Brodie opened a dresser drawer and pulled out a flannel shirt. “How about this? It’s large. It’s warm, and it will hide your headlights.”

  Kate couldn’t contain her smile, and taking the shirt, she put it on without further discussion.

  On Tuesday, after Brodie had agreed to give Kate one more chance, the rest of the evening had gone by without another word about what tomorrow or the next day would bring. Instead, their conversation was light, and revolving mostly around the expansion of Brodie’s business, Kate hung on every word. As Brodie promised, Stevie’s chicken dish was scrumptious, and afterward, they relaxed in the lounge until eyes grew heavy, and they made their way to the bedroom. Kate slipped under the covers wearing her pink, floral pajamas and Brodie, her black tank top and knickers, and when Brodie turned out the light and draped her arm around Kate as she burrowed closer, Kate said a prayer. She didn’t pray for time, and she didn’t pray for strength to carry out her promise. Kate prayed for Friday to come quickly. She had something to prove, and by God, she was going to prove it.

  ***

  Kate had spent Wednesday and Thursday resting while Brodie worked at the dining room table, popping her head into the bedroom every so often to check on her patient. Legs could now be shaved without the need of another, and Kate had begun taking short walks around the condo, gaining strength with every step she took. So, as they exited Brodie’s building, Kate was feeling better than she had in days, and filling her lungs with the fresh morning air, she gazed up at the sky. It was a gorgeous April day, and with nary a cloud to block her view, the sky was bluer than any blue she could remember. Kate took another deep breath. Christ, it felt good to be alive.

  When they reached the car park, Kate scanned the lot for Brodie’s car for a few seconds before realizing her mistake. “Um…I was looking for the Jag, but I forgot you sold it. What are you driving now?”

  Kate’s answer came when Brodie pressed the remote, and the lights on a silver sedan flashed a second before the horn on the car blew. “Over there,” Brodie said, gesturing with her head.

  As Kate approached the non-descript automobile, she unconsciously wrinkled her nose. “This is yours?”

  In three little words, Kate’s voice had climbed the scale all the way to the top, and Brodie’s eyes gleamed. “What? You don’t like it?”

  “Uh…well…” Kate said, eyeballing the family car. “I guess I was expecting something more…um…something more…”

  “Now remember, Kathryn. We can’t have a relationship if we aren’t honest with each other.”

  Kate slammed her hands on her hips. “Fine, then no, I don’t like it. It’s…it’s boring, and it’s…it’s—”

  “A rental.”

  “What?”

  “It’s a rental. The dealership only had a limited selection when I walked their lot, but they have two shipments coming in today, so after I’m done running you around, I’ll go over and pick something out,” Brodie said, smiling. “But I have to say, seeing the look on your face was well worth having to drive that for the past few weeks. You looked positively appalled.”

  Kate pursed her lips and narrowed her eyes until they were slits. “I’ll get you for that.”

  “That’s what today is all about, isn’t it?” Brodie said, opening the passenger door. “Now, in you go, or we’re going
to be late.”

  ***

  Brodie hadn’t allowed herself any expectations on what the day was to bring. She had been down this road far too many times, so when they walked hand in hand out of the medical building after Kate’s appointment, Brodie was trying not to stare at the woman by her side. For the past two hours, Brodie had waited for the shoe to drop…and the only thing that had dropped was Brodie’s jaw.

  Kate had held Brodie’s hand while they sat in a waiting room overflowing with people. She had introduced Brodie to the receptionist, making it loud and clear Brodie was her partner, and when Kate was asked to update some forms, she changed her emergency contact to Brodie, printing in bold, block letters PARTNER in the space provided.

  When Kate’s name was finally called, she insisted Brodie come back to the exam room with her, and when her doctor walked in, Kate made the introductions, just as she had in the waiting room. She held her head high throughout the morning, and never once faltered as she outed herself again and again…and again.

  Brodie hit the remote as they got to the car, and letting go of Kate’s hand, she opened the door. “In you go.”

  Kate stepped toward the car and then stopping, she shaded her eyes as she looked up at the woman inches away. “You’re awfully quiet.”

  “I’m trying to…um…I’m trying to absorb what just happened in there.”

  “What happened was my doctor said I’m well enough to talk to the investigators, so I’ll call my Chief when we get home.”

  “I’m not talking about the diagnosis, and you know it.”

  Kate smiled. “I told you, sweetheart, I’ve changed. I don’t care what anyone thinks anymore. If they want to stare, let them. If they want to curl their lips, they can knock their socks off. It makes no difference to me. I just hope I wasn’t presumptuous.”

  “What do you mean?”

  “Well, I did put you down as my partner. So…are you?”

  Brodie hung her head for a moment. “I want to be…”

  “But?”

  “But, I need some…” Brodie snorted out a laugh. “Fuck that fucking word.”

  “Let me guess,” Kate said, grinning. “You were about to say you need some more time, some more proof, maybe?”

  “Kate, I love you with all my heart, but you really did a number on it. You’ve got to know that.”

  “I do, and all it means is that I just have to keep showing you that I’ve changed until you believe it. That’s all.”

  “You’re not angry?” Brodie said, flinching back her head.

  “No, of course not,” Kate said as she climbed into the car. “Proving it is going to be fun.”

  Chapter Thirty-Four

  “You awake?” Brodie called out as she stepped into her flat.

  “Yes, I’m awake. Smart arse,” Kate said, coming out of the bedroom.

  Brodie removed her raincoat, shaking it to dislodge some of the water before hanging it up. “If it keeps raining, we’d best find an ark.”

  “They say it’s supposed to lighten up tomorrow,” Kate said, placing a small kiss on Brodie’s cheek. “How was your meeting?”

  “It went well. The Jacobs have their eye on properties all over the place, so as long as these conversions are successful, it looks like Ethan and I will be busy for years,” Brodie said while she gave Kate a slow once-over. “And how are you feeling?”

  Kate sighed. “You know, you’ve asked me the same thing every day, and every day, I tell you I’m fine. Gina knows I’m fine. Devon knows I’m fine. Why can’t you accept the fact that I’m fine?”

  Since her visit to the doctor a week earlier, wearing Brodie’s flannel shirts had become Kate’s norm, and today she had on Brodie’s favorite. The red and black checkered fabric had been washed a hundred times, so when Brodie hooked her finger in the collar, the cloth drooped easily. Exposing just enough of what remained of the bruise, Brodie said, “And what about that?”

  “That is fine,” Kate said, snatching the collar back up. “And unless you want to eat wearing those wet clothes, I’d suggest you change because dinner will be ready soon.”

  “You made us dinner?”

  “We’re having a picnic,” Kate said through a smile.

  Brodie glanced at the torrential storm outside the bank of windows in the lounge and then back at Kate. “Um…Kate, are you taking the painkillers again?”

  “No. I haven’t had any in days. You know that. Why?”

  “Because you must be high if you think having a picnic in the rain is a good idea.”

  Kate’s smile grew even wider. “How about a picnic by the fireplace?” she said, motioning toward the lounge.

  Brodie took a step and looking around the corner, her face lit up when she saw a blanket on the floor, with silverware and plates at the ready.

  “I hope you don’t mind,” Kate said, glancing at her makeshift picnic. “I was going to make a fire, but I didn’t know how to work the vent.”

  “I don’t mind at all. It’s marvelous,” Brodie said, gazing at Kate. “Do I have time for a quick shower?”

  “Yeah, go ahead. I still have some things to do.”

  “If you need help…”

  “Brodie, I’m fine. Geez,” Kate said, and taking Brodie by the arms, she pushed her toward the bedroom. “Now, go take your shower already and leave me be.”

  “I’m going. I’m going,” Brodie mumbled as she sauntered away. “Pushy wench.”

  Kate giggled to herself as she headed back to the kitchen to pull their dinner from the oven. Having received orders from her doctor not to return to work for yet another week, and not to drive for at least two, when Brodie suggested Kate stay at her place to recover, Kate didn’t argue. The only place she wanted to be was with Brodie, so after a quick trip to her house to gather some more clothes, Kate had spent the better part of the past week catching up on sleep while her body healed.

  As each day passed, aches and pains faded, and her nausea and dizziness were a thing of the past. Now, the only thing remaining from the accident was the memory, a few fading bruises, and a scar on her thigh where the sutures had been. They had slept in the same bed, eaten at the same table, and watched the same movies, yet through it all, Kate could sense Brodie was still cautious. She was still worried that Kate wouldn’t follow through on her promises even though on more than one occasion, Kate had proven Brodie wrong.

  On the way back from Kate’s doctor’s visit, Brodie said she needed to stop at the market for a few things, and while she thought Kate would stay in the car to rest, Kate wouldn’t hear of it. Holding Brodie’s hand, Kate meandered up and down nearly every aisle of the store, quietly chatting while they filled their cart. In the frozen food department, she didn’t think twice when she slipped her hand in the back pocket of Brodie’s trousers as they perused the selection, and while standing third in line to pay for their purchases, Kate gave Brodie a not-so-quick kiss on the lips.

  Later that same day, when Brodie was about to visit the car dealership, Kate asked if she could go, too. It wasn’t because she wanted to voice her opinion about whatever car Brodie would choose, and Kate hadn’t cared about the color or the accessories either. Kate only cared about the people who’d be milling about. She cared that they saw. She cared that they knew. And Kate cared that she didn’t if their reactions weren’t pleasant.

  Just as she had done in the market, as soon as they stepped from the car, Kate had taken Brodie’s hand and refused to let go. In a way, Kate thought her attempt to prove she had changed was a small one, yet Brodie’s smile told her differently. It was full, and it was bright, and it was proud. And when a few of the shoppers at the dealership had the nerve to shoot a condescending look in her direction, Kate returned her gaze to Brodie and beamed. The stupidity of others no longer concerned her.

  ***

  After showering and donning a pair of jeans and a loose-fitting, bow-necked jumper, Brodie returned to the lounge, placing a few small logs in the fire pit before openi
ng the vent. Lighting the kindling, she stepped back just as Kate came over carrying a bottle of wine and two glasses. “Are you allowed to have that?” Brodie said, pointing at the bottle.

  “You know, for someone who doesn’t want to have babies, you sure do have mothering down pat,” Kate said, handing Brodie an empty glass. “And for what I can only hope will be the last time, I haven’t taken any medication in almost a week, so will you please, for the love of God, stop coddling me.”

  Laugh lines formed on Brodie’s face, and without saying a word, she held out her glass so Kate could fill it. After taking a sip, she discovered it was one of her better Cabernets. “So…” Brodie said, looking past Kate to the kitchen. “What’s for dinner?”

  “Lasagna.”

  “I didn’t know lasagna was considered picnic food.”

  Kate playfully peered up at Brodie before setting the wine bottle and her glass on the end table. “And I didn’t know you were such a stickler for details,” she said, heading back to the kitchen. “Go figure.”

  No sooner had Brodie turned back to the fire to check its progress when the lights in her flat began to flicker. A few seconds later, the power went out, and with the fire in its early stages, it allowed Brodie only enough light to see a few feet in front of her. Then she realized Kate was in total darkness. “Kate,” she called out. “Kate, are you all right?”

  Kate chuckled under her breath as she stood in the middle of the kitchen surrounded by darkness. “No, sweetheart,” she shouted back. “I’ve fallen into that huge hole in the floor, and I’ll never be heard from again.”

  Carefully feeling her way through the kitchen toward the soft glow in the lounge, Kate stepped from the shadows and smiled. “Are you going to be like this for the rest of our lives? Because if you are, I seriously think you’re going to need to get some counseling since you seemed to have forgotten what I do for a living.”