Redeeming Rafe

by Sloane Kennedy

  “That email was sent to Benton but he never reported it to his superiors. In fact, it looks like he deleted it.”

  Understanding seemed to dawn on Rafe and he slowly sank to the couch. “Even when you hit delete, you’re never really deleting anything,” Rafe said numbly.

  “There were more emails,” Dom said as he carefully lowered himself to the opposite end of the couch. “They were between Benton and a woman named Geraldine Holt. She was an aid worker that Ren was having a relationship with.”

  “But she was using him to steal information on his unit’s movements. She and Benton were working together to sell weapons and supplies to the Taliban. The ambush was a set up so the terrorists could get their hands on some tactical weapons Ren and his team were safeguarding during transport,” Vin explained.

  Rafe dropped his head into his hands and Cade reached down to put a hand on his shoulder.

  “Everybody was supposed to be killed that day but we’re guessing the terrorists took Ren and his surviving teammates as hostages so they could try and ransom them to the U.S. for money or use them as part of a prisoner exchange.”

  “Jesus,” Rafe whispered. “I didn’t even look at the rest of the emails after I found his location. It didn’t even occur to me.”

  “Benton must have figured out his system was hacked. We don’t know how he knew it was you but Ren being rescued by Vin and his men probably was what made Benton suspicious,” Dom said.

  “It would have been easy for him to find someone to backtrack my hack,” Rafe murmured. “There’s a hundred guys out there better than me and I was so focused on what I was doing with you…”

  Rafe’s voice dropped off.

  “I contacted some friends at the Pentagon,” Vin said. “Benton’s in the wind. He took off a few weeks ago and no one’s heard from him since.”

  “You have a picture?” Cade asked, his juices flowing. Finally, a name for the fucker who’d dared to come after Rafe. Who’d left Ren to rot in that hell hole.

  Vin nodded and pulled out his phone and sent the picture to Cade’s phone. He hadn’t gotten the best look at the guy when he’d been shooting at Rafe but one look at the beady eyes and thinning hair that appeared on his phone and he knew.

  “It’s him,” Cade muttered.

  Rafe suddenly stood. “I can disappear,” he said quickly as he suddenly reached for his bag and headed towards Cade’s room. He’d long since moved the few belongings he had into Cade’s bedroom.

  Cade grabbed his arm. “No, not an option.” He could feel Rafe shaking beneath his hand.

  “You think he’s going to give up, Cade?” Rafe glanced quickly at his brothers. “How long before he comes after you and the people you love just to get to me?”

  “We can protect you,” Vin said.

  Something passed over Rafe’s features at Vin’s words but it wasn’t the doubt or resentment Cade would have expected Rafe to feel after hearing the promise he’d heard once before so many years ago. No, it was longing, concern, fear. He was truly afraid for his brothers and their families…for him. And that worried him because fear could drive even the smartest people to do stupid things.

  “You’re not leaving,” Cade snapped, unconcerned that he was being too aggressive.

  “Let go,” Rafe said firmly as he tried to pull free.

  Cade never took his eyes off Rafe when he said, “Go.” Dom and Vin got his message and headed for the door. Cade heard the door close behind him and he released Rafe when he yanked his arm free.

  “This is not something you get to decide for me,” Rafe snapped as he again started towards Cade’s room.

  Cade grabbed him once more but this time he backed him up until he hit the foundation beam near the entry way to the kitchen. The same one he’d tied Rafe to that fateful day weeks earlier. He held him gently by the throat as he pinned him with his body.

  “You remember the last time I had you here?” he said softly.

  He didn’t miss the feel of Rafe’s shaft pressing against his but Rafe remained silent.

  “That was the last time there was a you or a me because I knew the second I held you in my arms in the shower that you were mine and I was yours. There’s only “we” now and we will make this decision together.”

  “I don’t want you to have to choose,” Rafe whispered, his body softening against his.

  “It’s too late for that,” Cade replied as he leaned in and kissed Rafe. Relief went through him when Rafe didn’t fight him and kissed him back. Within minutes they were locked in each other’s arms on Cade’s bed and Cade yanked Rafe’s shirt off. He knew he should go slow but the thought of Rafe walking away from had him desperate to bind this man to him. Rafe worked his own pants off as Cade stood and shed his clothes and then he was reaching into the nightstand. He grabbed the lube and settled over Rafe once more who welcomed him by separating his legs so Cade could sink between them.

  “I need to be inside you again,” he muttered as he skimmed his hands over Rafe’s chest. “Nothing between us this time,” he said as he held up just the lube. “I’m clean,” he said and waited.

  “Me too,” Rafe said with a quick nod as he dragged Cade back down for another kiss.

  “I can’t go slow,” Cade rasped as he reared back and opened the lube.

  “Don’t,” was all Rafe said, his dark eyes burning.

  Cade’s fingers shook as he got Rafe ready and when he finally sank inside in one smooth motion, he groaned in contentment. Strong arms wrapped around him as he tucked his hands under Rafe’s back and pulled him flush against his chest. Rafe pressed soft, sweet kisses against his lips even as Cade pounded into him. The more urgent Cade’s need became, the more Rafe lovingly touched him and spoke soft words of encouragement to him as if to reassure him he was still there. And when those long awaited words were whispered into his ear, Cade came apart and he shouted Rafe’s name as he filled Rafe with spurt after spurt of his release. Rafe’s fingers bit into his arms as he shattered beneath Cade and liquid heat pooled between them. Cade separated their bodies enough to pull his dick free of Rafe long enough to rub it the white fluid on Rafe’s abdomen. He made sure Rafe could see their come mixing together and then he buried himself deep inside of Rafe’s body once more and just stayed there as they kissed.

  As time passed and Rafe made no effort to separate from him even though he knew the man probably wasn’t comfortable with cooling come on his stomach and in his ass, Cade forced himself to pull out.

  “Let’s take a shower,” he said as he ran his hands through Rafe’s hair and pressed gentle kisses over his face.

  Rafe nodded.

  Cade stilled his hands on the side of Rafe’s neck and said, “Promise me you won’t leave.” He kept his eyes trained on Rafe’s eyes as the other man studied him for a moment.

  “I promise,” Rafe said, his eyes never wavering. “I love you, Cade,” he said. “More than I thought possible,” he admitted and Cade knew he was telling the truth.

  “I love you too,” he whispered and leaned down to kiss Rafe once more before forcing himself to stand.

  “I’ll get our bags,” Rafe said as he stood and brushed a kiss over Cade’s lips.

  Cade nodded and went into the bathroom to start the shower. As he waited for it to warm he glanced down at his stomach and smiled at the few specks of Rafe’s release that glistened against his skin. He couldn’t help but swipe his finger through it and take a taste. He had no idea when he’d become such a hedonist but with Rafe, everything was turning out to be new. And his gut told him that it would be that way for the rest of their lives.

  Cade searched the bathroom closest for some fresh towels. All that was left were a few hand towels so he went to his bedroom and grabbed a couple of towels from the laundry hamper. Not ideal but laundry had been the last thing on his mind in recent days. As he turned back to the bathroom, something shiny caught his eye and his stomach fell out when he realized what he was looking at. Rafe’s watch – t
he one he never took off – was sitting on the nightstand.

  ***

  He’d lied. He’d stared into the eyes of the only man he’d ever loved and that loved him back and he’d flat out lied. The words about loving Cade had been true, but everything from the moment Cade had pressed him up against that beam had been a lie. He’d known as soon as Cade admitted that he’d already chosen him over Dom and Vin what would have to happen next. The irony had been that Cade had been the desperate one during their lovemaking while Rafe had savored it because he knew it would be the last. He’d wanted to remember every touch, taste, sound. And when Cade had emptied himself inside of him, he’d nearly lost his resolve to go through with his plan. Even now knowing that part of Cade still lingered in the recesses of his body had him craving more.

  But then Cade had asked him to promise not to leave and the old, manipulative Rafe had returned and he’d seamlessly lied straight to his lover’s face. It was still easier than having to listen to the way Cade had dismissed Dom and Vin in favor of him. Cade had already started the process of ending the relationships that had made him who he was. Rafe knew what it was like to not have a family. No way in hell would he condemn Cade to that.

  Rafe pushed open the stairway door that led into the parking garage and then ran over to the doorway that led to the street. He had no idea if Jagger was still on duty so he’d decided to forgo using the lobby door. He followed the alley up to the main street and checked up and down for any sign of Cade or Jagger but there was no one. It was still light out but there was little foot traffic around. But Rafe knew that would change the second Cade realized he was gone. He had minutes at most so he walked quickly down the sidewalk, his eyes scanning the street for cabs. After dragging on his jeans and shirt on the way to the living room, he’d managed to snag his wallet from his bag on the way out the door but had left everything else behind since he didn’t need it.

  Within a minute he spied a cab on the opposite side of the street.

  “Rafe!”

  At the same time he heard Cade scream his name, tires squealed as he stepped off the curb. Everything after that happened in slow motion. The black sedan barreling at him. A hard body slamming into his. Flying through the air. The sound of cracking glass. And then nothing.

  He struggled to take in air as his aching body rolled across the pavement. He finally managed a deep cough and then a shallow wash of air went through his oxygen starved lungs. Another one followed and he rolled onto his back, his eyes staring up at the stormy clouds passing at a snail’s pace above him. A shadow passed over him and it took him a split second to realize what he was seeing – a man standing over him, a gun pointed directly at him. A bullet shattered the air around him and he closed his eyes as he waited for the searing pain but there was nothing. When he opened them again, he was face to face with the same man who now lay lifeless on the ground next to him, blood and brain matter seeping from the hole in the side of his head.

  Rafe scrambled away from the gruesome sight and looked up to see Jagger hurrying towards him, gun drawn.

  “You okay?” Jagger asked as he neared.

  “Cade? Where’s Cade?” he asked as he frantically searched around, bits and pieces of the last minute rushing back to him now. The oncoming car. A body hitting his, holding it close as the car struck them.

  “Cade!” he screamed, his voice dropping off as he finally found him. “Oh God,” he cried as crawled the few feet to Cade who lay completely still in a crumpled heap in the middle of the road. Blood trickled from his nose and there were cuts all over his face.

  “Cade!” he yelled again as he ran his fingers over Cade’s face. But he wouldn’t answer. He dropped his head to Cade’s chest and sobbed in relief when he heard a shallow breath and a faint heartbeat.

  “Jagger, get help!” he called as he reached down to press his lips against Cade’s mouth.

  “Cade, please, wake up,” he begged. “I’m sorry, please!”

  Tears streamed down his face as he continued to plead with Cade to respond but there was nothing. Absolutely nothing.

  Chapter 11

  Rafe wrapped his arms around himself as he focused on his breathing. In and out, just like Cade had told him so many times. He closed his eyes and let Cade’s touch float over his skin as his deep voice counted the seconds between breaths. Everything around him disappeared as Cade brought him back down. There was no hard waiting room chair beneath him, no overhead speaker calling out for doctors to go to certain rooms, no people shuffling past to get to the vending machine for their hundredth cup of coffee. It was just him and his man.

  “Rafe?”

  A palm settled on his upper arm but it wasn’t the right one. The voice was wrong too, but he knew whose it was. Had never forgotten it in the twenty years since it had promised to bring him home.

  Rafe forced his eyes open and saw his brother’s concerned face as he knelt in front of him. Vin was standing right behind Dom and beyond that he could see Jagger talking on his cell phone.

  “He wouldn’t wake up,” Rafe whispered brokenly just before he launched himself into Dom’s arms. Dom somehow managed to pull them both to a standing position and then he was holding Rafe tight.

  “He’s strong, Rafe,” Dom whispered against his neck.

  When arms wrapped around him from behind he completely lost it and began sobbing. His keening cries sounded foreign even to his own ears but neither Dom nor Vin tried to stop him or settle him in any way. They just held him. At some point they managed to get him into a small, quiet room but Rafe was too far gone to care how and when. He was sitting on some type of bench and leaning against Dom who had an arm wrapped around his shoulders. Vin was sitting on a chair directly in front of him, his hand holding Rafe’s in a near death grip.

  “I left,” Rafe blurted out. “I thought it would be better if I disappeared,” he whispered. His eyes stung from the pain of fresh tears falling. “He put his body between me and the car. He took the brunt of it.”

  “He needed to protect you,” Vin said gently.

  “He…he had a seizure in the ambulance,” Rafe managed to get out as the image of Cade convulsing uncontrollably on the gurney flashed through his mind. “They said his brain was starting to swell and they had to relieve the pressure…” He struggled with remembering what the doctor had told him as they took Cade away from him. “They have to do a cran…cran…”

  “Craniotomy,” Dom supplied.

  “He’s tough, Rafe. And he’s got something to fight for so he’s going to make it, do you hear me?” Vin said firmly as he shook his hand.

  Rafe had no idea if he nodded or not but it was the last any of them spoke for a long time. When the door to the room opened and a doctor entered, he jumped up as his heart leapt into his throat.

  “How is he?”

  The doctor glanced at him in confusion and said, “Are you Mr. Barretti?”

  He was too keyed up to correct the doctor about his last name so he just asked, “How is he?” again.

  “Mr. Barretti, I’m just here to take a look at your injuries.”

  Rafe wanted to scream that he didn’t give a fuck about his injuries but a gentle hand closed over his shoulder.

  “Rafe, Cade’s going to want to know you’re okay when he wakes up,” Dom said softly.

  He had to give his brother credit for using Cade to get his compliance. He managed a stiff nod and followed the doctor to another room full of medical equipment. As the doctor motioned to the bed he heard Dom say, “We’ll be right outside, okay?”

  Panic began to sift through Rafe. He didn’t want this man touching him. He just wanted Cade. His brother must have seen something on his face because Dom hesitated at the doorway and then moved back into the room. He came to a stop in front of Rafe and then gave him a reassuring squeeze on his arm as he nudged Rafe towards the hospital bed. “Just keep your eyes on mine, okay?” Dom whispered as he went and dragged over one of the chairs along the far wall so that it was di
rectly across from him.

  “Would you remove your shirt, please?” the doctor asked softly.

  Rafe’s fingers shook as he began working the shirt off and his breathing started to increase.

  “Are you all right, Mr. Barretti?” the doctor asked in concern.

  Dom stood and motioned something to the doctor and then focused his attention on Rafe.

  “Did Cade tell you about how we met?” Dom asked.

  Rafe shook his head as he tried to suck in more air. “He said you were in Iraq together.”

  “We were but we were in different units. I was heading back to my bunk one night and some guys started hassling me. One of them was a soldier I’d messed around with, but I’d told him to fuck off when I heard him saying some pretty nasty shit about an officer who’d been transferred out because he admitted to being gay. Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell was still in effect at the time,” Dom said as he stepped back and sat back down in the chair.

  Rafe felt his shirt being raised and fingers skimming over his shoulders and then down his chest and between his ribs.

  “So it was seven to one,” Dom continued. “I was getting my ass kicked and then out of nowhere this giant of a man steps in and knocks two guys out before anyone even realized he was there.”

  A smile skated over Rafe’s lips at the image.

  “I didn’t even have to lift a finger because the last two guys took off running when he finished off three more guys by himself.” Dom laughed. “Then he steps over one guy and asks me if he can bum a smoke. When I told him I didn’t smoke he starts searching the guys he’d just beaten the shit out of.”

  “I didn’t know he smoked,” Rafe said as his breathing started to normalize. A stethoscope was placed on his chest and he inhaled deeply when the doctor asked him to.