Love or Money?

by Carrie Stone

  “I thought you were taking part in the charity thing? I wasn’t expecting you until later.”

  He walked ahead of her into the kitchen. “Yes I was going to, but they had a change of players at the last moment and asked me to do a commentary instead.” He picked a piece of avocado from her plate and popped it into his mouth. “I’m grateful though, as I get to spend more of the afternoon with you.” He leaned in to kiss her on the cheek and she felt herself swallowing back tears of guilt. She moved away from him quickly.

  “Are you ok?” Phillip asked, looking at her curiously. Sylvia felt herself paling. She couldn’t do it. She couldn’t be dishonest with him. She had always been a terrible liar and despite Phillip blowing hot and cold, he didn’t deserve to be left in the dark.

  “I’m pregnant” she said blurting the words and avoiding his eyes.

  The silence seemed to stretch before her as she waited for him to respond. She looked up to see his face ashen and shocked.

  “Pregnant? Wow. I wasn’t expecting that.” He rubbed his face nervously, standing transfixed.

  “Well, neither was I. But I guess that’s the beauty of life. A curveball comes at you when you least expect it.” Her voice wavered and she sat down at the kitchen table and sank her head into her hands, fighting back tears.

  Phillip walked over to her. “Darling, it’s not the end of the world. We’re two adults, we both have good jobs. We love each other, don’t we? We can do this.” He stroked her back and squeezed her shoulder supportively.

  Sylvia was speechless, taken aback by his words. She stood up, turning to face him and huddled herself into his embrace.

  “Phillip, do you mean that?” she asked, laying her head against his chest. His body felt frozen and she felt herself shivering. She didn’t know if it was from nerves or coldness.

  “Of course I mean it. I’ve already told you that you’re the one I want in my life. Ok, so we didn’t plan children yet, but it would have happened sooner or later. So why not now?”

  Sylvia pondered on his words. He seemed so certain and positive about it. It was the complete opposite of how she’d expected him to react. It had thrown her. Phillip wanted her and the baby. In that split second she made a conscious decision never to tell him about Dan. He couldn’t know. It would ruin everything.

  “You’re right” she said, kissing him on the lips. “Why not now.”

  “Well in that case, you sit down while I make us a coffee to get over the shock.” Phillip joked, walking over to the kettle. “Then you can tell me everything.”

  Sitting down again at the kitchen table with her back to him, she realised with great apprehension that she hadn’t considered her own feelings about being pregnant. She’d just assumed that Phillip wouldn’t want the baby and the most sensible outcome would be to have a termination. She hadn’t really considered that she’d keep the baby.

  She reprimanded herself mentally, the reality that she was having a baby sinking in. It wasn’t a business transaction she could back out of, or a problem she could sweep under the carpet. It was a life. She was going to be a mum. Her very own little family to look forward to. Why then, didn’t she feel excited at the prospect? And why was she suddenly questioning her feelings towards Phillip again?

  “Are you absolutely certain love?” Glenda asked, stroking Zara’s hair as she cradled the sobbing woman in her arms.

  Zara hiccupped through her tears. “Yes, I’m positive. It explains everything, Glen. I knew there was something wrong but when Abbey said about Catherine…”

  “Shh…” Glenda hushed her quietly, trying to keep her own nerves steady. That bastard Steve. How could he do it to Zara? All those times Felicity had shot him down and she’d stuck up for him. Her own daughter had been right all along. He was a spineless cheat.

  “Let me make you a cup of tea and you can tell me the whole story” Glenda said, patting Zara’s knee and wondering how on earth she was going to help the poor love get through this mess. She’d always held Steve in such high regard. He seemed such a doting husband and father to the girls. She couldn’t imagine him cheating on Zara. But then, she thought of James, Felicity’s ex and realised that not only were looks deceiving but what went on behind closed doors was always different to the image every couple liked to portray.

  “I’m sorry, Glen, to call you up again in tears.” Zara sat up straight and wiped her eyes with a scraggly piece of toilet tissue. “I didn’t want to worry Fee with her being so far away. She called me twice yesterday but I purposely didn’t answer. And I know how she feels about Steve. She doesn’t like him anyway.” Her bottom lip quivered.

  “Zara, I’ve told you a hundred times; you are like a daughter to me and anytime you need something, I’ll be there.”

  Glenda got up and walked into the kitchen with Zara following behind. She was silently grateful that Zara hadn’t told Fee yet. She’d only received an email from her daughter that morning with some heart-warming news. She’d decided to stay in Australia a little longer and there was a new man that had helped her to make the decision. An Australian voluntary worker called Owen. He sounded just what Felicity needed in a friend – someone wise and down-to-earth. She didn’t want her daughter once again preoccupied with problems from back home. Maurice’s news had been enough for one week. The girl deserved to enjoy herself.

  Using the opportunity to change the subject and try to get Zara’s mind away from her situation, Glenda brought up Felicity.

  “Really? I didn’t know she’d made a new friend?” Zara said, seeming a little perplexed. “She didn’t mention anything to me in her last email. I wonder why.”

  “Well, love, with all due respect, you just said that she’d tried to call you twice yesterday – perhaps she thought she’d mention it to you then?” Glenda said tactfully. She hadn’t appreciated just how anxious and suspicious Zara was feeling. The last thing she wanted was to cause a rift between the girls over something so trivial.

  Zara sighed sadly. “Sorry, you’re right. I’m just feeling really unhinged at the moment. The smallest of things are setting me off.”

  Glenda set down a hot cup of tea in front of Zara and sat down opposite her. She discreetly glanced at the clock on the cooker. Bill was expecting to meet her for lunch, but she still had plenty of time. Had she known Zara was about to drop a bombshell on her, she would have re-arranged. As it was, she didn’t feel right making a call in front of Zara and rescheduling. It would make the poor love feel guilty for changing her plans.

  “So come on, tell me from the beginning. What exactly has been going on with you and Steve?”

  Glenda waited patiently as Zara took a sip of her hot drink and dabbed once again at the fresh wave of tears forming in her eyes.

  It was going to be a long morning.

  “There you are!” Bill exclaimed, replacing the mobile he’d just taken from inside his suit jacket. “I was just about to call you to see where you’d got to.”

  Glenda took a moment to catch her breath as she hurried the last few yards towards where he was waiting. “Sorry. I didn’t have a chance to call you. I’ve rushed all the way here.”

  Bill kissed her on the cheek. “Don’t worry, they’ve held a table for us and I haven’t got to be back at the office until three o’clock.”

  “That’s good then. We’ve got plenty of time.” Glenda smoothed down her vibrant blue flowing skirt and realigned her chunky beaded necklace.

  Bill opened the restaurant door and gestured for her to walk ahead of him. “You look lovely by the way.”

  Glenda was pleased with the comment. She’d treated herself to the skirt the previous day at the local charity shop and the beads she’d found in Felicity’s wardrobe. It was a little trendier than she was used to dressing, but she felt she carried it off well. She’d seen other women her age dressing in bold colours and Fee had always been on at her to change her appearance. It was refreshing to look in the mirror and actually like what she saw. It was just a shame s
he hadn’t had the chance to do her hair in the new style she’d tried out. What with Zara needing her assistance all morning, she’d barely had enough time to change outfits before taking the bus.

  The Spanish restaurant was small and dark inside, with plenty of unoccupied tables to choose from. She made her way towards a table for two by the window. It was a cosy ambience, especially on a day that wasn’t particularly bright. The clouds outside loomed threateningly.

  A foreign looking waiter immediately attended them. “Buenas Tardes. Bienvenidos a Casa Pablo. What drinks can I get for you today?”

  Bill picked up the wine menu and glanced quickly at the options. “Let’s go for that bottle of Red.” He pointed to his selection on the menu.

  “Bottle? Bill are you sure? I wasn’t intending to have any more than one glass of wine.”

  Bill put down the wine menu and looked at Glenda. “Oh, we must. We’re celebrating.”

  Glenda looked confused. “Celebrating? Celebrating what?”

  The waiter cleared his throat, interrupting. “I’ll give you a chance to look over the food menu and I’ll be back with your wine to take your order.”

  Waiting until the waiter was out of earshot, Bill took Glenda’s hands in his, across the table. “I know we haven’t been seeing one another for that long but I must say Glenda, I haven’t felt this way in a long, long time.” Glenda felt her face flush and she smiled, nodding in agreement. “Which is why - given the news I’ve had at work today - I have to ask you something important.”

  Glenda felt her anxiety return in volumes. Surely he wasn’t going to ask her to marry him?! She felt her eye twitching. It was far too early to be talking about marriage. What on earth would Felicity make of it all? As happy as she was with Bill, she had her daughter to consider as well….

  “I’ve been offered an eighteen month contract heading up a new start-up office in Cambridgeshire” Bill beamed, rubbing her hand excitedly in his.

  Glenda was lost for words. He’d never mentioned a new work contract. And certainly not Cambridgeshire. She felt her heart skip a beat. What did this mean for their relationship?

  Trying to keep the disappointment from her voice, she squeezed his hand. “That’s great - you’re obviously over the moon about it. I’m pleased for you. Well done.” She was aware that she sounded a little contrived, but she didn’t care. She was crestfallen. When it came down to it, he was just like all the other men she’d met. Selfish.

  “Well, that’s I want to ask you and part of the reason for celebrating” Bill said eagerly. “Obviously, I want you to come with me.” He looked at her expectantly.

  Glenda shifted in her seat, not quite following the drift of the conversation. What exactly was he trying to say?

  “I don’t understand?” she began, as Bill laughed at her confused expression.

  “You dozy mare. I’m asking you to move with me to Cambridgeshire. It’s not forever, just whilst I get this new office set up; then of course we can come back to London and, depending on what you’d prefer, we can talk about living together in either of our flats or buying something totally new.”

  Glenda gasped. Bill wanted her to go to with him?! By the sounds of it he had already formulated their short term plans for the future.

  “Bill, are you sure? I mean, of course I’d love to consider accompanying you, but it’s a big decision moving in together.” Her nerves returned, this time for entirely unexpected reasons.

  “Don’t be daft. You’re the best thing that’s happened in my life lately and I wouldn’t even be considering the work contract if I knew it wouldn’t be right for you too.” He looked her squarely in the eyes. “But I know it will be right for you. It’s time you lived life for you, Glenda and made yourself happy. There’s even a famous pottery workshop close to the office.” He smiled and gave her a small wink.

  Glenda didn’t know how to react. Her heart was pounding so fast it felt like it was going to burst from her chest. It had been her lifelong dream to pursue her love of pottery-making. Ever since Felicity had been small she’d made clay ornaments, but as the years passed and times got harder, she didn’t have the time or finances to continue her hobby. It thrilled her that Bill had thought of her in that respect.

  “Oh, I don’t know what to say” Glenda said honestly, her hands trembling with nerves.

  The waiter approached with the wine and gently filled each of their glasses.

  “You do know what to say, but you’re too scared. I bet in that head of yours you are thinking about Felicity and how she’ll react.”

  Glenda shifted her focus onto the road beyond the window. He was right. Felicity didn’t even know Bill existed, let alone that her mother had just been asked to live in Cambridgeshire with him for eighteen months. How could she abandon her daughter, especially at such a crucial time. Felicity needed her, didn’t she?

  “Ok. I’ll go.”

  Bill looked at her wide-eyed in surprise. “Really? You’ll come with me?”

  Glenda giggled nervously. She couldn’t believe she was agreeing to move with him, but he was correct. She was fifty-three years old, if she didn’t grab her chance of happiness now, how many more chances would she get? Felicity was a grown woman with her own life. Besides, Cambridgeshire wasn’t too far on the train. She could be back in London within a few hours.

  She picked up her wine glass and held it up. “Yes, really. I’m coming with you. So let’s toast our move.” Bill picked up his glass and gently clinked it against hers.

  “To us. And to our future together.” They both took a sip of the silky wine, before breaking into infectious nervous laughter.

  It was only then that Glenda realised she hadn’t asked when his contract was effective from. Would there be enough time for Felicity to absorb the news?

  Chapter Seventeen

  Felicity sat next to Owen on the small bench outside the Queensland Art Gallery, her feet pulsing with heat from the two hours spent walking alongside him around the huge exhibition center.

  If truth be told she’d never appreciated fine art, or any art for that matter; her knowledge was limited solely to renowned paintings that were universally known. However, the experience had proved invaluable; she’d been especially drawn to the Indigenous Australian art collection for the use of natural earthly colours and symbology. Owen had proved to be a fountain of knowledge when it came to understanding the basics of Indigenous heritage and culture. All things considered, it had been a truly beautiful and unexpected surprise. By no means was she disappointed that it wasn’t the wine tasting day trip she’d hoped for.

  “So now you’re a master of knowledge on Aboriginal customs, why don’t you come to Cairns too? There’s a large Aboriginal cultural park there that you’d enjoy.”

  Felicity put down the plastic fork she was using to eat her fruit salad and stared at Owen, bemused.

  “So whilst you help out at the rainforest butterfly sanctuary, I spend my days visiting the cultural park and familiarising myself with the didgeridoo. Is that what you’re suggesting?” she teased.

  Owen laughed and stabbed his fork into a mammoth strawberry. “Stop being a smartarse.” He directed his fork towards Felicity’s mouth. “This will shut you up.”

  Felicity laughed and shrieked as he held her head and tried to force feed her the strawberry. Finally succumbing, she took a bite and smiled. “Stop being horrid. You’re supposed to be my friend!”

  Her smile faded as she looked into Owen’s eyes. She couldn’t be certain but she felt that there were definite feelings of more than friendship on both sides but neither had taken the initiative to make those feelings known. It had been over a week since their dinner and she’d spent every available moment with him. Yet not once had he tried to kiss her. It was confusing. Despite her intuition telling her one thing, his actions were saying something completely different.

  Owen caught her expression and returned to eating his fruit salad. She sat next to him in awkward silence.


  “Did you renew your room at Darlene’s yet?” he asked, breaking the uncomfortable moment.

  “No. After our chat the other day, I realised you’re right. Brisbane doesn’t hold anything for me but it’s not time to go home yet. I told Darlene I’d be leaving in a few days.”

  “I’m serious, you know. Come to Cairns. You will love it. There’s so much to see and do there.” He popped a piece of Kiwi fruit into his mouth, a small trickle of juice running down his chin.

  Without thinking, Felicity leaned across and wiped it away with her finger. She considered his words about Cairns carefully. There wasn’t any place more appealing that she could hope to base herself for the final part of her trip, but she didn’t want to put Owen in a compromising situation. Was he simply being nice and inviting her out of kindness? She really wanted to believe that he wanted her with him but she couldn’t be sure.

  “I’ve been contemplating going to Melbourne but I don’t know…” She trailed off, letting the words hang between them for a few moments, hoping to gauge his reaction.

  He continued eating and shrugged his shoulders.

  “You’d probably enjoy Melbourne. It’s more you, I guess.”

  “What do you mean, more me?”

  Owen tilted the plastic container and poured the remaining juice directly into his mouth. Felicity shook her head disapprovingly. Didn’t he care that he was behaving like an ill-mannered child in public?

  Owen grinned. “That is what I mean by ‘more you’. That look you just gave me, the snotty, stuck up, critical one. Melbourne will suit you perfectly. It’s more cultured, refined, classy. As a city, it has an air of European about it. You probably won’t find people sitting on benches there and drinking the juice of their fruit salad from the carton.”

  Although he tried to sound amusing, she caught a trace of sarcasm in his voice.