Third Time's the Charm

by K. Evan Coles

  “Oh, right—he told me last week. Humph.” Ella grasped Luke’s fingers as they stepped out onto the crosswalk, her lips pushed into a pout. “He’s coming to the race on Monday, though, right?”

  “As far as I know, yeah. He and Miles went to a party at a friend’s house on Cape Cod, but he said they’d be back on Sunday night. That should give Simon time to meet us for the race. If he wants to be there, anyway. He and Miles may just stay at their friend’s house another day instead.”

  Ella let go of Luke’s hand once they were safely across the street. “So it’s just you and me tonight, huh?”

  “Yep,” Luke said. “You feel like sharing a vanilla frappe with me at dinner?”

  Ella smiled. “Um, yes, please. But can we get chocolate instead?”

  “Mmm, okay. Guess I’ll have a burger.”

  “Aw, poor you.”

  “I know.” Luke rubbed his hands together, more for effect than out of any real desire to eat. “What are you having?”

  “Banana pancakes,” Ella replied without hesitating.

  “Really?”

  “Uh-huh. I like the pancakes at the diner.”

  “I know you do,” Luke replied. “Guess I’m used to you ordering the same thing every Friday night. You’re kind of blowing my mind, kid.”

  “Well, Simon’s not here to ‘help’ me eat my dinner”—Ella made air quotes with her fingers—“so I thought I’d eat something different.”

  Luke processed her words for a moment. “You don’t order the mac and cheese for Simon, do you?”

  “No way.” Ella shook her head. “I love it. I save some for him, though, because I know he likes it too. Besides, that way I have room for dessert.”

  “So smart. Simon complained about you always ordering the same food, you know.”

  “He did?”

  “Yes,” Luke replied, with utmost solemnity.

  Ella tsked. “He’s so weird.”

  “You have no idea how right you are, honey.”

  He held his hand out again at the next intersection and this time, Ella kept hold of it after they’d crossed the street. They talked as they strolled, discussing her day at school and the apple-picking outing she had planned with her grandparents, as well as things left to prepare for Peter’s return home. Luke thought Ella had forgotten all about Simon’s absence, and she caught him off guard by circling back to the topic.

  “Were you invited too?” she asked. They were a block from the diner and Luke stared at her while he parsed the question.

  “Invited where?”

  “To the party with Simon and Miles.”

  “Oh. On the Cape, you mean? No, I wasn’t. I haven’t met Miles’ friends,” Luke said.

  “I thought maybe you were but couldn’t go because of me and I felt kind of bad.” Ella looked dissatisfied. “How come you’re not invited? Simon’s your friend, and Miles is Simon’s friend. Isn’t Miles your friend, too?”

  “Not exactly. I’ve met him a couple of times and he seems cool, but we don’t know each other very well yet.” Luke shrugged. “That’ll change if he and Simon keep seeing each other and I get to spend more time with him.” He thought Ella seemed oddly concerned.

  “You don’t mind, right? That you weren’t invited, I mean.”

  Luke gave her a small smile. She was worried his feelings had been hurt. “No. Simon and Miles are getting to know each other. It’s good for Simon to have some time away from work and, well, me.”

  Not to mention I’d be the only single guy in a house full of pairs. No thanks.

  “I have other things to do anyway, like hang out with you,” Luke said aloud.

  Ella nodded. Her expression remained thoughtful, however, and Luke braced himself for more probing questions. To his relief, they didn’t come. He’d never shut Ella down, but he didn’t feel like talking about much of anything and hadn’t since his disastrous lunch with Finn on Wednesday.

  A familiar sense of grief and shame fell over him as he and Ella entered the diner. Luke had gone to Finn’s that afternoon resolved to get them back on track. He’d even had a pair of tickets for Saturday’s baseball game at Fenway Park in his jacket pocket. Unfortunately, Luke hadn’t had a chance to ask Finn about the game before everything had gone to utter shit.

  If Luke had been able, he would have gone home after leaving Finn’s apartment instead of back to the office. He would have locked himself in the bathroom and, for the first time in more than a decade, shed tears over a man. The luxury of a pity party hadn’t been an option, of course, so Luke had shoved his emotions down instead, put on his game face and forced himself to keep moving. Luckily, Simon and Gillian had been working offsite all week and hadn’t been around to witness his dark mood.

  Finn had reached out several times since Wednesday with both phone calls and messages, but his late shifts had made the exchanges rushed. They’d been stilted and devoid of their usual flirting, too, and Luke blamed himself. His confidence had taken a real hit and now he dreaded doing or saying the wrong thing so much he went nearly tongue-tied any time they spoke.

  Luke kept all those thoughts to himself while he and Ella were seated, and they talked about upcoming movies they wanted to see after placing their orders. He caught Ella watching him a couple of times with a puzzled kind of expression on her face, but the stack of pancakes she’d ordered soon provided an excellent distraction.

  “What time are Gram and Pops picking me up tomorrow morning?” she asked around a mouthful.

  “Gram said to be ready by eight,” Luke said. “Pops is craving French toast and he found a place outside the city he wants to try.”

  “Why don’t we eat brunch with you and Finn? It’s not like there won’t be a ton of food.”

  “I’m not making brunch tomorrow.” Luke fixed his focus on his plate and half-eaten burger and worked at keeping his face straight. “Finn’s working and you’ll be with Gram and Pops—doesn’t seem any point in making all that food for one person.”

  “Well, that stinks,” Ella grumbled. “You want to come to breakfast with us instead?”

  “Nah, that’s okay. I have stuff to do around the house.”

  “Uh-huh.” Ella smirked without missing a beat. “You want to spend time with Finn after he gets out of work. I see how it is.”

  “Of course you do.” Luke didn’t bother correcting her assumption. He didn’t want to go into why Finn wasn’t coming by for brunch, or whom he’d be spending time with playing golf. Luke had a good idea of who that was because he knew Paul and Mick were already busy. They’d be at Fenway Park, using the baseball tickets Luke had wanted to give to Finn.

  * * * *

  The next day, Luke functioned mostly on autopilot. His alarm woke him and he got Ella out of the door with his parents. He put in an easy two-mile run along the river and spent some time doing yoga to stretch. He got his race bag together and absolutely didn’t think about Finn and what he might be getting up to with a handsome dark-haired someone. After lunch, Luke stretched out on the couch with a book, but the next thing he knew, he was waking up in an almost dark room.

  Luke blinked and sat up. He heard the front door open and checked his watch, and his stomach sank when he saw it was already six. He’d slept away the entire afternoon and didn’t feel any less weighed down by fatigue.

  Ugh.

  He blinked again as the overhead light came on.

  “Luke? Honey, are you okay?”

  Luke’s mother crossed the room toward him with a brown paper bag in her hands. Ella followed close behind, a cloth tote no doubt filled with apples looped over one shoulder.

  “Guess I fell asleep.” Luke got to his feet and faked a sheepish expression. “Sorry about that.”

  Joanna cocked her head at him and hummed. “You look exhausted. Are you here by yourself?”

  “Uh, yeah, why? Here, let me get that.” Luke held his hands out for the paper bag.

  “Well, Ella thought Finn would be here,” Joanna
said, then chuckled. “I didn’t know what to expect with the lights out.”

  Luke met Ella’s searching gaze before he glanced back to his mother. “Got it. Finn has a work thing today, actually. What’s this?” he asked and held the bag up.

  Joanna smiled. “Pasta from that place you like in the North End.”

  “Nice. Are you staying to eat? Where’s Pops?”

  “He’s downstairs with the car. We’re having dinner with Jeanne and Bobby Lutz and should get going if we want to be on time.” Joanna replied, then paused. “Are you sure you’re okay? You’re a bit pale. You didn’t overdo it training today, did you?”

  “No, ma’am. Two miles and stretching, that’s all.” Luke held up one hand in a fair approximation of a scout’s salute and put on another smile for his mother. “I took it easy, I swear. Thank you for the dinner, and for taking Ella with you today. El, you said thanks, right?”

  “Of course she did,” Joanna said before Ella could speak. “We had a great time and the only person who ate too many apples was your father.”

  “He looked a little green,” Ella agreed. “He didn’t barf, though.”

  “Almost.” Joanna laughed. “You were too busy scaling that tree with the other kids to notice when your old Pops disappeared for a good ten minutes.”

  Ella grimaced. “Gross. I’m gonna go pretend that didn’t happen now. Bye, Gram. See you guys tomorrow.”

  Luke walked his mother out and locked up, then headed for the kitchen. He handed Ella the takeout bag and went to the cabinet for plates.

  “How many apple desserts will we be baking in the next week?” he asked.

  Ella smiled at him over her shoulder. “So many. Gram thought we could make some of those vegan oatmeal muffin cup things you like and bring them with us to Salem.”

  “That’s a good idea.”

  Luke stopped by the flatware drawer before he carried everything over to the table. He noticed then that the order included three of everything: three containers of pasta, three side salads and servings of bread, even three chocolate chip cookies wrapped in paper glassine bags. He stared at the spread for a moment.

  “Are you feeling extra hungry tonight?” he asked Ella.

  “I thought Finn would be here, too,” she said, “so we ordered enough for three.”

  Oh.

  “I see.” Luke managed a smile. “That was thoughtful of you. What did you order for Finn?”

  “Some bacon and tomato thing with penne. I thought it kinda sounded like a BLT sandwich. He told me you bought him one the first time you went out for coffee, and he’s liked them ever since.”

  “That’s true—he can’t get enough of them.” Luke swallowed against a sudden swell of emotion. Quickly, he cleared his throat and focused on their food. “Thank you, honey. Finn would appreciate this.”

  They put the extra dinner in the refrigerator and took the rest to the living area where Luke put on a movie. He and Ella rarely watched television during mealtime, but he felt like zoning out in the Marvel Cinematic Universe for a couple of hours with a plateful of carbs. Their dishes were empty and Ant-Man was battling Yellowjacket when Ella’s head came to rest against Luke’s shoulder. He glanced down at her mass of dark hair.

  “You tired?”

  “Nah.” She tilted her head and stared up at Luke. “Can I ask you a question?”

  “Of course.”

  “How come you weren’t with Finn today? I thought you guys were going to a baseball game.”

  “He had a golf tournament for charity,” Luke said. “Hard to argue against raising money for the hospital, you know? Even I know that’s more important than a baseball game.” He worried his lip with his teeth. “Don’t tell Pops I said that.”

  “I won’t.” Ella smiled faintly. “Is Finn coming to watch you run on Monday?”

  Luke shook his head. “He’s working nights this weekend. He could still be sleeping by the time we get back to Boston.” Luke raised a hand and gently fingered one of Ella’s braids before he shifted his focus back to the movie. “We could ask if he has time for dinner next week, if you like.”

  “Okay. Like, before Saturday brunch?”

  “If he has time,” Luke hedged. He didn’t even know if brunch with Finn was on the table anymore. Ella sat up straight and the open concern in her face prompted Luke to run his palm up and down her arm.

  “What’s wrong?”

  “If we don’t see Finn before brunch next week, that’ll be two weeks since he was here.”

  “Almost, yeah. Sometimes, our schedules make it tricky to line up time together.” Luke weighed his next words and kept his tone light. “Don’t take this the wrong way, El, but it never occurred to me you’d mind not seeing him.”

  The tips of Ella’s ears flushed pink. “I’ve gotten used to him being around, I guess. And I know you like spending time with him.”

  “Sure.”

  Ella rolled her eyes. “I know you do, Luke. You don’t have to lie about it.”

  “I’m not lying—”

  “Is this because of me?”

  “What do you mean?”

  “Is Finn staying away because of me?” Ella asked. The question threw Luke for a loop and he sat up straighter in his seat, too.

  “No, it’s not about you at all. Finn likes you fine.”

  “But he doesn’t come over more because of me.”

  “That’s not true,” Luke said earnestly. “Finn and I wanted to spend time getting to know each other on our own first. To do things that aren’t always related to school and homework and rainbow-striped food, if you know what I mean.” He licked his lips.

  “Finn is aware you don’t much like him, though. I get that you probably think that’s no big deal. Why should Finn care, right? But he has feelings, just like you. He wasn’t super jazzed to know you banned him from our Friday night dinners, for example.”

  Ella grimaced. “You told him?”

  “He asked about joining us, and I didn’t want to lie, so yeah, I told him. He mostly understood. Finn knows I love you and that I want you to be happy, but I don’t want him to think I’d stop seeing him because he’s not your favorite person, either.”

  “Would you do that?”

  The insecurity in Ella’s voice cracked Luke’s heart. “I hate to think I’d have to, honey. You’re my family, and I would do anything to keep you safe and happy. Finn means a lot to me, though, and I’ve been trying hard to make sure I don’t have to choose. I’m not doing a very good job of it, unfortunately.”

  “What do you mean?”

  Luke ran a hand over his mouth. How could he explain something to Ella that he had trouble understanding himself? “I tried to do things with Finn to make him feel good…special. But the opposite happened.”

  Ella frowned. “How?”

  “I made him feel bad instead and like I don’t care about him.” Luke jammed his lips together in a tight line. “I didn’t mean to, but it seems I’m flat-out terrible at being someone’s boyfriend. Not that Finn and I really got there.”

  Ella stayed silent for a long moment. “Did you break up?” she asked at last, her voice small.

  “No. But I’m not sure what’s going to happen next.”

  She nodded slowly. “That’s why you’ve been sad.”

  “Damn, I thought I did a good job of hiding it.” Ella’s somber demeanor shifted to withering and Luke chuckled past the ache in his chest. “Yeah, okay. That’s why I’ve been feeling down. I told you Finn is important to me. It hurts to think about losing him.”

  Ella said nothing, and he could almost see the gears turning behind her eyes. “What about when he moves back to Chicago?” she asked.

  Luke enfolded one of her hands in his own. “What makes you think he’d do that?”

  “He told Gram he could move back there someday.”

  “Yes, he did,” Luke said. “That doesn’t mean Finn has any real plans to move, though. He just moved here this past spring and he ha
s a really good job at the hospital. Finn likes living in Boston, too. He could go back to Chicago someday, sure, because his work could take him to anywhere, but I hope he doesn’t anytime soon. Just like I hope you and your dad stick around Boston, too.”

  Ella frowned. “Huh?”

  “After your mom left, your dad wanted you to have a place you could call home instead of moving with him to a different Marine base if his orders changed. He knew I didn’t have plans to go anywhere, so you came to live here. Your dad could take you with him instead, though.”

  Ella blinked slowly. “I never thought about it that way. What if you wanted to move?”

  “Well, we’d have to figure something out. But I don’t see that happening anytime soon, El.” Luke shrugged. “I have a lot of things keeping me here in Boston. My friends are here, my business, not to mention you and your Gram and Pops.”

  “What about Finn?”

  Luke chewed the inside of his cheek as he struggled to understand. “What about him?”

  “If he asked you to move to Chicago with him, would you?”

  “I’ve never thought about it. I’d be surprised if Finn has, either.” Realization struck Luke like a slap of cold water. “Is that what you’ve been thinking? That Finn would leave and I’d go with him?”

  “I know you like him, Luke. Maybe you even love him.” Ella’s lips tightened when Luke moved his head in a jerky nod. “So if Finn moves, you’ll go with him, right?”

  “I don’t have an easy answer for that.” Luke gestured at the room around them with his hand. “Leaving here would be something I’d have to know was right before I could do it. I wouldn’t pick up and leave simply because a man asked me to. No man I’d want to be with would ever ask that of me without talking it through, either.”

  “Would Finn?”

  “If the right thing came along and he thought it was a good time to move, he’d talk to me about it. If we were still together, I mean. But Finn would want to find the best solution for everyone, not only himself.”

  Ella nodded, and her eyes were suddenly bright with tears. “I got scared,” she said. “I thought if you liked him enough, you’d leave, too.”