Afraid of Love: Bid on Love Series Bachelor #8 & Hard to Love Book #1

by Annelise Reynolds

  “Dammit.” Rainbow’s head comes up off my feet. “Sorry Bow,” I mutter and rub her head. It is almost eleven and the shop will be open. He’d be working, probably on another leggy blonde, that shows more cleavage than a bikini and a short, so short if she bent down you’d be able to see if she waxed or shaved.

  The doorbell rings, bringing me out of my grumbling thoughts. Rainbow takes off barking, and I follow behind her to the door. I look out the peephole and freeze. Sebastian is standing there with sunglasses covering his eyes.

  “Open the door, Jaci.” His voice washes over me and sends my pulse tripping.

  I bite my lip and look down at Rainbow. Her tail is wagging. She is excited to have a visitor. She looks at me as if to say, ‘What are you waiting for?’ I’m still in my pajamas, but I don’t have time to run and change.

  “Come on Jaci.” Sebastian knocks on the door. “I know you’re there.”

  My hand shakes as I turn the locks and open the door. Rainbow pokes her head out as soon as the door opens, but Sebastian doesn’t take his eyes off me even though he greets her with a head rub.

  “Hi.” I tug on my shirt nervously. “How did you know where I live?”

  “Nadine, are you going to let me in?” His voice is low and seductive. I move aside to let him in.

  When he moves past me, his arm looped around my waist, and he pulls me against him, his lips come down on mine, and he turns me enough to shut the door. My back hits the hard surface of the door, and my breasts flatten against his chest as he blocks me with his body. Hungrily he kisses me.

  His mouth pulls from mine and trails down my neck as his hands roam over my body. “God, I want you. Why the fuck didn’t you come back to the shop?”

  I gasp when his mouth sucks on the upper curve of my breast. He grabs the hem of my shirt and steps back long enough to rip it over my head. We both groan when he cups my bare breasts in his hands with his thumbs moving over the stiff peaks of my nipples.

  “I didn’t know you wanted me to.” I gasp out as his tongue dances around my areola. “Oh, God.” I moan and my back bows off the door when he sucks hard on my nipple. His teeth bite down eliciting pain and pleasure in a swirl of hunger and need.

  “I wanted you to. I was just giving you time to process what is going to happen.” His beard tickles and scratches against my skin. The firmness of his touch and the feel of his lips trailing on my skin, it is a mix of sensations I’ve never experienced before.

  He raises his head from my breast and kisses my lips softly. “Times up unless you say stop right now, Jaci. If not, I’m going to give you your second lesson in pleasure.”

  “Second?” I ask, only half listening. My head is still spinning, and I feel like I just drank a bottle of wine.

  “The other night when I made you come without even touching that pretty pink pussy was your first lesson. Lesson two is more, hands on.” He grins.

  I hesitate for all of two seconds, “My rooms upstairs. Second door on your left.” He wastes no time in lifting me up. His hands are gripping my ass, while his beard tickles my breasts and his lips slant over mine again. I wrap my legs around his waist and cling to him, trusting him to get me there safely and losing myself in his kiss again.

  The next thing I know, my door is slamming shut, and my back is against it. Bas shackles both my wrists with one of his hands and braces them against the door above my head.

  “As bad as I want to and God, I want to fuck you so hard right now.” His hips thrust towards me. His rigid length is pressing into my belly. “I’m not going to fuck you now. When we do fuck, I’m not letting you out of bed for days.”

  Sebastian claims my lips again and carries me towards the bed. I feel the coolness of the sheets on my back and the heat of his body over me. He pushes himself up and removes what is left of my pajamas, which wasn’t much only a pair of short pink shorts.

  “You’re so damn beautiful, Jai.” His eyes rake over my naked body. He takes his shirt, shoes, and socks off, but leaves his pants on. I feel exposed and disappointed because I want to see the rest of him too.

  He lies down beside me and props himself up on one elbow. His other hand cups my cheek as he places a much softer kiss on my lips. The fan overhead sends cool air blowing softly against my heated flesh. My nipples are already pebbled from arousal and tighten further from the chilled air.

  Sebastian trails his finger down my chin, to my neck, over my collarbone, and everywhere he touches he leaves gooseflesh in his wake. He sets my body on fire with his every touch.

  I moan when his fingers fit in my wet slit. His tongue dips into my belly before he kisses his way back up my body, taking his time to kiss, tease, nibble, and massage my breasts. I lift my hips against his massaging fingers.

  “God, you’re tight.” He curls his fingers inside me, and I shudder around him.

  “That feels amazing.” I squirm against him. My body is begging for more. He chuckles before catching my lips in another long hot kiss.

  “Good. Just keep feeling, baby. We’ll both get off before we go to work.”

  I moan when his fingers move over my clit. I rock against his hand and run my fingers through his hair; the thick strands are sliding through my fingers.

  “Easy baby.” He chuckles. “You need to get off, don’t you?”

  “Yes.” I groan out, moving against him and trying to get him to stop teasing me.

  “I’m going to make you come so hard, and I’m going to come with you. Do you trust me?” His eyes are locked on mine as he waits for an answer. Why is he asking that? I trust him more than I trust most, but this feels different as if he’s about to cross many lines.

  “Yes. Please, just get me there.” My breathing is unsteady, and my body is coiling tighter. I need relief.

  Sebastian stands back from the bed making his hands leave my body momentarily, while he strips off the rest of his clothes. For the first time, I saw him below the waist, and it takes my breath away. He is huge. His legs look thick as tree trunks all sinew and sleek muscle, much like his upper body, his lower body is an inked canvas.

  He is beautiful. Everywhere.

  Chapter 19

  Sebastian

  Her skin feels like warm silk. She is so smooth and tastes like heaven. I can’t wait to lick between her legs and have her thighs clamping around my head as I eat her dewy slick pussy.

  I will have to do that later. Right now, I’m barely hanging onto my control. Jaci’s skin against mine is electric. No woman has ever made me shudder just by her naked skin sliding against mine, but I’m fucking shuddering.

  “I’m not going to enter you, but I want to feel your pussy on my cock.” I bend her knees and push them towards her hips. Her pussy is spread wide by the position. I can see her wetness and her clit peeking out. Later. I lick my bottom lip imagining her taste there.

  “Please Bas.” She moans and tries to move her hips up, but with my arms pinning her legs she can’t move.

  I reach between us and open her pretty pink lips so I can slide my cock along her length. The head of my cock pushes against her clit, and she sighs with relief. Her pussy is slick, and with every drag of my cock along her seam, I pick up her slick arousal on my length.

  “Fuck.” I reach down and slap my cock on her clit. “Your body melts for me, baby.” I rotate sliding along her slit and slapping at her clit with my clock. She is squirming under me. Her hips roll as she tries to move me where she wants me. I slide until she is tensing and ready to come and then switch back to slapping my cock on her pussy. Back and forth I work her, taking her to the edge before stopping her from going over.

  “Please. Please.” She shakes her head. Her nails dig into my arms as she clings to me. I grind my cock down on her clit and cries out as she comes. Her pussy is sensitive, and I can feel the spasms of her release along the length of my shaft.

  “I’m going to cum on your pussy.” I want to come inside her, but with our rules, it is out of the question. I’ve
never wanted to go bareback before, but Jaci is different.

  I bare down on her pussy, sliding and grinding into her. Her breathing is fast as she starts building back up towards another orgasm. My balls are aching for release, but I want her to go over once more before I lose it.

  “Oh yes. Oh yes.” She gives a low moan as her body catapults off again. I feel a gush of warm cum on my cock, and I can’t hold on anymore. I come hard. My cock is twitching against her warm wet pussy with my cum coating her mound and lower belly with my seed.

  “Goddamn.” I’ve never come so hard or so much in my life. She fucking wrung me dry. I move to the side of her and pull her close. “That was incredible. I needed that.”

  “You’re not just saying that, right? I mean, we didn’t even go all the way, this is what kids do in high school. I’m way behind the curve here.”

  “Trust me, Jai. You make the grade just fine.” My phone goes off, “Fuck.” I check the time on my phone as I check my message. “We’re late. Get dressed as quick as you can.”

  I get out of her bed and look back at her beautiful glowing body still stretched out on the bed and covered in my cum. She looks well fucked, and I haven’t even really fucked her, yet. That will come soon enough. I just have to get her as addicted to me as I already am to her.

  I take her into the garage and explain we’re riding my motorcycle.

  Her arms are wrapped around me as she clings to me like a piece of tape. She’s never been on the back of a bike before, but she doesn’t hesitate to get on behind me, which satisfies something inside me.

  At the shop, Drake is already inside waiting for me. He speaks, as we answer without even looking up from his phone, “Our Lieutenant would be disappointed in your tardiness.”

  “That’s the best thing about being out. I work on my own timetable.” Jaci’s hand is in mine when he looks up. His brow arches and a slow grin spreads across his face.

  “Ah, I see. Never mind, Phantom would approve. Hi Jaci. I see you chose this bearded dragon over me.” He places a hand over his heart acting sad and disappointed. “I will eventually get over it, but just know you broke my heart.”

  “You’d have to have a heart for her actually to break it, asshole and you were never in the fucking running.” Drake has a particular set of skills, and one of those skills is getting under the skin of everyone around him. He knows just where to prod and put pressure to get a reaction out of you. He already has my number where Jaci is concerned, and I want to wipe the smug grin off his face.

  “You ready?” I squeeze Jaci’s hand gently, then move towards the back chair. Drake follows behind. I set up the inks I need and turn the music on, trying to avoid what I know is coming.

  Jaci is setting herself up at the desk again, and Drake sits in the chair as I begin working on the tattoo he had me draw up. “So, the auction date went well.”

  “It did,” I grunt. No need to deny it. Jaci and I are seeing each other if you could call it that. She is here and if I have my way she’ll be spending a lot more time at the shop. I liked eating lunch with her and ordering takeout for dinner. Showing her pleasure is just icing on an already delicious cake.

  “Wow, I didn’t think I’d ever see the day you’d fall.” We talk low so that the music and distance would keep Jaci from hearing our conversation.

  “You’re the heartless asshole, not me. I was just waiting for the right girl.”

  Drake didn’t pop off with a smartass remark as I expected. He didn’t say anything, just let me continue to work in peace. I might have noticed how tense he got if Nadine hadn’t come in.

  “Bas. I need to talk to you.” I look up at the sound of her voice. She sounds stressed, and her voice is louder than normal. “Jaci.” She comes to a stop seeing Jaci at the desk. She looks at me and sees Drake in the chair. Her shoulders sag, though I’m not sure if it is relief or defeat. “Sorry. I didn’t expect you to be busy this early.”

  I sat back and removed my gloves. I’ve barely gotten started on Drake’s piece, but Nadine has a look about her I’ve never seen before. “It’s fine, Nads. Come back to the back office.”

  “No.” She looks again at Drake and Jaci. Something is really wrong. “It’s fine. I’ll see if Neal can help me. It’s nothing big.” She gives me a forced smile and leaves and not saying bye to any of us.

  “That was weird,” Jaci speaks up first.

  “I’ll call Neal and make sure she goes to see him,” I say, grabbing another pair of gloves. Nadine isn’t one to be pushed into talking about anything.

  “Shit.” Drake gets up before I can get back to work. “I forgot I had a group coming in for jet ski rentals. I got to get going to make sure they are gassed and ready to go.”

  Just like that Drake is out the door and my morning is suddenly clear. “Well, getting out of bed in a rush was a waste.” I spin Jaci around in the chair and rest my hands on the arms of the chair. I lean down close to her, “It’s a shame too. I was only just,” I kiss her lips. “Getting.” Kiss. “started.” I kiss her deeply. Her arms go around my neck pulling me closer, and I smile at the confident and bold move.

  “Mmmmm. It could’ve been fun, but we need to get to work.” Jaci pulls back with a soft smile.

  “Would’ve, not could’ve, baby. It would’ve been a whole lot of fun.” I stand straight after kissing her again and move to put away everything I was going to use for Drake’s tattoo. After I finish wiping the area down, I go to the office and call Neal.

  “Yeah.” He answers on the first ring. Neal is rarely without his phone. If it isn’t on him, he is in court, or he’s disappeared into DC again. Nads and I talk about where he disappears to, but she has no clue. She thinks there is a woman but knowing Neal; I guess there are several women.

  “Nadine came into the shop a few minutes ago. She said she was going to call you when she realized I wasn’t alone. If she doesn’t call you for help, let me know.”

  “I’ll call her. Anything else.” I close my eyes. He didn’t see Nadine. Everything about her brief time in my shop this morning bothers me. She isn’t happy, in fact, she almost looked scared, and Nadine doesn’t scare easy. She couldn’t. Not when she grew up around Neal and me.

  “No. I’ll try calling her tonight. Let me know if she talks to you.” I hung up pissed at one cousin and worried about the other. Sighing, I call Nadine to see if she wants to come back to the shop, but she doesn’t answer. I send a text to her telling her Drake is gone if she wants to come back and we can talk. For some reason, they hate each other, so it doesn’t surprise me she didn’t want to stay.

  “You okay?” Jaci comes into the back office, her voice soft and sensitive. Damn, my chest squeezes at her gentle concern.

  “Yeah. My instincts are telling me to find Nadine, but I know her. She left here without talking to me. Trust me, she won’t say a word until she’s ready and if she was ready the fact that you and Drake were there wouldn’t have stopped her from telling me what was up. You two gave her the perfect excuse not to talk.”

  “You know her well.”

  “Yeah. She’s my best friend beside Drake.” I run a frustrated hand through my hair and sit back in my desk chair. “When we were kids, Nadine and Neal spent a lot of time at my house. Mom watched them while Aunt Kaila worked two jobs. My uncle is an asshole lawyer who cheated on my aunt and left to shack up with his secretary. Neal took it hard. He was never the same after his dad left and it made him cold and withdrawn. They were more like siblings to me, and Nadine stayed that way. Neal distanced himself from everyone. He’s there, solid if you need him but he keeps his life separate.”

  Jaci leans against my drawing table. I fold my hands over my flat stomach and lean back, so I was looking up at her. She is so damn beautiful. “I can understand that. I did the same thing after Josh.”

  “Who’s Josh?” I try to appear relaxed, knowing if I let her onto what was really going through my head she’d freak and run.

  Jaci looks over at
the photos of art I’d done on the wall. Without looking at me she starts telling me the story, “He was my boyfriend during my senior year of high school.” By the time she finishes telling me the story, I wanted to rip the guy’s head off. I stay seated and bury the rage that is boiling my blood. He is out of prison now, and if he renews his obsession with her, he’d have hell to pay.

  Chapter 20

  Jaci

  Sebastian doesn’t say anything. I’m not sure what I expect him to say. It’s not every day the woman you’re screwing has a psycho ex-asshole who almost killed her, but Sebastian didn’t react at all.

  Instead, his arms come around my waist, and he pulls me back against his hard body. It is there again, that feeling of complete and total safety. I relax into the warmth of his embrace. “I thought I could do it.” I sigh and snuggle into him.

  “Thought you could do what?” His chin is resting on the top of my head as he holds me close. I blankly stare at his drawings and photos relishing in the feel of the comfort he offers.

  “I’ll tell you later, right now I need to go get some writing done. I have a deadline to make, and my editor has been emailing me for pages.” I sigh, tired of running. Tired of being scared, of being afraid to love, and live. Sebastian eases my fears and makes me want more.

  I give him a small smile before moving to the lobby desk and starting to work. The only time I look up from the computer is when someone comes in or the phone rings. Other than that, I’m focused on the story going on in my head. The characters are telling me their thoughts, their fears, and their lives. It’s hard to explain to people that don’t know the process of writing. I’ve tried before, and they look at me like I’m crazy. Even Kaiya looks like I’ve sprouted another head when I start rambling about a character’s background to try and connect some plot points.