Eternal Mourning

by Carrie Ann Ryan

  It wasn’t until they were getting close to where a few of the other wolves were training outside the wards that Walker realized he was still holding Aimee’s hand.

  He didn’t let go, but he knew he should probably talk about what he’d planned to instead of chatting about the den, the weather, and other inane things. Especially since it only spoke of some of their personalities rather than whom they truly were.

  “What did you want to talk about, Walker?” Aimee asked, pulling him to a stop just out of hearing distance of the wolves in the training ring.

  Walker spotted Brandon, Parker, and Avery among those present and gave them a slight nod before turning back to Aimee. The triad was training together with a few other wolves, and Walker was glad to see them out like this. They were still a newly mated triad, even so many months in, and they didn’t have much time with one another given all three of their positions in the Pack. Avery was also one of the newer wolves, so she needed more training than most of them. Thankfully, she had Parker and Brandon to help her, as well as the rest of the Brentwoods.

  “There’re a lot of things we should talk about, but every time I try to say something to you, I feel like I’m making a fool of myself.”

  She gave him a weird look. “That’s how I feel, too. Not that you’re making a fool of yourself, but that I’m the one being an idiot. It’s like I’ve never had a conversation with another person before. When I’m around you, my mind seems to go on the fritz, and I forget how to put words together in a coherent sentence.”

  “You sound plenty coherent now.” He ran his thumb along the side of her hand, his wolf in agreement with the man—they needed to know more about Aimee.

  She snorted, her nose scrunching up in an adorable way that brightened her eyes and made the dark circles underneath practically melt away. If he had any say, that darkness would never come back. He’d made this vow not only because he was a Healer, but because she was his. And when he was able to voice the words, he would say them aloud, as well. She needed to hear them, and he needed to feel the connection to her when he said it.

  “That’s only because we’re alone…ish.” She gestured toward the others around them just out of earshot. “Which makes no sense since it used to be the opposite.”

  He turned to her, cupping her face, though he knew he should slow down so he could get his thoughts in order. But the mating heat—and damn it, it had to be the mating heat—rode him hard, and he could only fall into its sweet embrace.

  “I need to kiss you,” he whispered, thinking he must be losing his mind.

  Her eyes widened. “I need that, too. But we also need to talk…right? I mean, this is crazy. There are a million things more important than what I need from you right now, yet this is the only thing I can think about. It makes me feel like I’m making stupid and selfish decisions but… I don’t care.”

  He slid a strand of her hair behind her ear and frowned. “Talking…talking we’re going to do. I promise you. But never think that doing something for yourself is selfish when all I’ve known you to do is things for others.” He licked his lips, his eyes on hers. “And, by the way, you were pretty coherent there, too.”

  He lowered his head, his lips a mere breath away from hers. He knew he was moving too fast; something so unlike him, it was as if something else were pushing him to act like this. There were people around, watching, and he was normally such a private person, he’d have never held someone so close like this before.

  But this was Aimee, and there was something about her that drove him in a new direction.

  Heat spread over Walker’s face, but he knew it didn’t come from the woman in his arms. He looked up, only to growl and pull Aimee closer to him. He hit the ground with her tucked into him, seemingly trusting him completely with her safety, and rolled over her as the fire swept over them, licking and flicking its heated tongues over his skin before continuing on to its intended target.

  Someone screamed, and fire slammed through the trees from four directions, one large stream burning over Walker’s and Aimee’s heads.

  “Witch,” Walker rasped, and Aimee tugged his arm down so she could see, though he still did his best to cover her and shield her from the worst of it. He was a wolf and could heal. He knew she didn’t have much time as it was, human or not.

  “What’s going on?” Aimee asked from beneath him. “Where did all this fire come from? Are you hurt?”

  He shook his head and opened his mouth to say something, but as quickly as the fire had appeared, it dissipated just as fast.

  Leaving only destruction and a pained howl in its wake.

  “Parker!” Brandon yelled, and Walker was on his feet so fast, he barely had time to blink.

  Only the need to keep Aimee safe made him slow down so she could run by his side toward where his brother-in-law lay on the ground between his two mates. Other soldiers and wolves ran around them, seeking out those who would harm their Pack, and Walker knew Kameron’s men would be on the prowl soon.

  But Walker wasn’t a soldier.

  He was a Healer.

  He didn’t run toward the attackers.

  He ran toward the fallen, heedless of claws, magic, and bullets. That was his duty to his people, his Pack, his family, and his moon goddess.

  A responsibility he had never forsaken.

  Never taken lightly.

  He went to his knees at Parker’s side and was vaguely aware that Aimee had kept up with his long strides. Now, she stood behind him, her hand on his shoulder yet still out of the way so others could move around and she wouldn’t end up in the line of fire. The way they’d moved together had been instinctual to both of them, and he would have to think about the why of that once he did what he had to do.

  He didn’t have time to think about who the fallen was or the fact that his brother would never be the same if Walker weren’t fast enough. He couldn’t think about the fact that Parker was one of the good ones, and that he had already sacrificed himself and his future once before to save them all. He couldn’t think about the fact that this man was not only family through mating but also a friend that Walker counted on.

  He couldn’t think about the fact that if he couldn’t save him, they would not only be in a full-scale war with whoever had done this, they could go into it in a blind rage that could cost more lives than if they had time to plan.

  He couldn’t think about any of it.

  He could only concentrate on the wounds that marred Parker’s flesh, and the agony ripping through his veins. That was what called to his wolf, and it was what Walker could use to get him through the painful process to come.

  “What the fuck happened?” his triplet, Brandon barked. Though they weren’t identical, he knew the rage in Brandon’s eyes matched his own.

  At least, on one level.

  The utter agony beneath the rage was one of a mated pair and triad that Walker didn’t understand…yet.

  “It was a witch,” Walker bit out, then looked down at Parker, holding his reaction to what lay before him deep inside. It wouldn’t do anyone any good for him to reveal what he felt at this point.

  Parker’s flesh had been seared in some places, crisped in others. Bruises marred the parts of his skin that weren’t burnt, and Walker had a feeling the other man had thrown himself on top of one of his mates when the fire came close and there was nowhere to run. No one else’s flesh held a true burn mark.

  Only Parker’s.

  His clothes were mostly ash at this point, yet the wolf had his eyes open and locked on Avery. Walker knew if Brandon had been closer to Parker’s head, it would have been his other mate he looked at. But for now, she was his touchstone, and Walker would use that.

  “Do we need Leah?” Brandon asked.

  Walker nodded but wasn’t sure there was time to get their sister-in-law. Leah was a water witch, a healer—the antithesis of the fire witch that had thrown flames Parker’s way with such precision. It could have only been because of a dark cu
rse.

  Someone must have taken out his or her phone to call Leah, but he couldn’t focus on that. No, his attention could only be on the man below him. Walker closed his eyes and tugged on the cord that connected him to his wolf and Healing powers. Each Healer—like any of the named hierarchy within the Pack—had a bond with each and every Pack member. Some were stronger than others, but his new one with Parker since the man had recently joined the Talons after his mating with Brandon and Avery was strong.

  Because Parker was damned strong.

  And so was Walker.

  His warmth slid through him and out of his fingertips, heading down the bond that connected him to Parker. The other wolf’s chest rose and fell as he shook, but Walker didn’t let up. He Healed. It hurt. It wasn’t easy, not this time, but he didn’t stop. Would never stop. The triad had been through enough in their lives, and he’d be damned if he let a witch do anything more to them.

  Every time Aimee squeezed his shoulder, he felt stronger. He didn’t know if it was in his head or if there was something truly connecting them that he couldn’t quite grasp, but he leaned on her as he Healed.

  And because she was there…he could.

  Chapter Six

  Aimee swayed but stood strong as she watched the flesh on Parker’s chest knit itself together. She’d never seen anything like it, and from the way the others watched in astonishment, she wasn’t sure they had either. She’d known Walker was a Healer, but this…this was unlike anything she could have imagined.

  And now she had a glimpse of why Walker had said he needed to Heal her.

  Because it was his gift.

  But from the way his own skin grayed, and how his breathing became labored, she knew his power came with a price. So she held onto him and gave him everything she had, even if it was just on a mental level that told him she was there for him. She stood there, as strong as she could be for him.

  That tug within her chest pulled again, and she willingly let some part of her escape. It wasn’t like when she ached from her curse, it was something more. Somehow, she knew it was because of Walker.

  What that connection—however imaginary or fragile—was, she wasn’t sure, but she would find out.

  As soon as Parker was Healed, or at least as much as he was going to be lying in a field right outside the den wards, someone pulled up in a truck, and they placed Parker in the back of it with Avery and Brandon each near his head. Parker was conscious at that point, doing his best to reassure his mates that everything was okay, and repeatedly saying that Walker was a damned magician.

  Aimee might not be sure about the former, but she wholeheartedly agreed with the latter after watching the magic flow through Walker’s skin and into Parker’s. She’d watched as he put everything he had into his gifts as Healer. He hadn’t stopped trying to save Parker, even when his own body looked as though it were taking a beating.

  While she didn’t know exactly how his magic worked, she knew just from watching him that he’d pulled energy from himself to Heal Parker. It had to hurt, even though it wasn’t like in some of the stories online where they said that he took the injuries on himself. Humans were constantly wondering how shifters worked and what magic they held, and it led to a lot of false information. She’d never wanted to believe that Parker’s burn marks would show up on Walker, and was honestly relieved that while Walker’s skin looked far paler and clammier than it had before, it was still burn-free.

  From what she’d seen, he’d already sacrificed so much of himself for his Pack, and she wasn’t sure she’d be able to hold herself back from trying to stop him if he pushed more.

  But he was doing well, and Parker would be okay—at least she hoped he would from what she had seen. And it wasn’t as if she had any right to tell Walker what to do. She just had an odd attraction to him, same as he when it came to her. That didn’t mean she could hold him back from doing what his Pack bonds needed him to do. She wouldn’t stand in the way of that.

  Why she even thought to try, she didn’t know.

  Strong hands slid over her shoulders, and she leaned into Walker as he stepped up beside her. She’d have known who he was from his presence alone, and while that might have seemed weird before knowing about magic and shifters, right then, it felt as if it were her new normal.

  “We need to get you inside the den wards just in case this was only the first attack,” Walker grumbled, his voice low and a little raspy. He usually almost drawled with a quiet strength, but he sounded a bit exhausted. She couldn’t blame him, considering how much better Parker had looked when they drove away compared to the horror he’d been in when the fire attacked him. She’d never seen anything like it, and she was so glad that she and Walker were close enough to help him when he needed it.

  As Walker’s words penetrated her slow thoughts, she stiffened. It honestly hadn’t occurred to her that she could be in danger. Not with the adrenaline that had been running through her system and the power of the wolves surrounding her. Walker had protected her, had literally thrown his own body over hers even though he was the Healer and there was no one there to Heal him.

  And while the seriousness of the situation crept into her bones, so did her worry for the man who only thought of others, never himself.

  “As long as you come with me,” she said firmly.

  He gave her a strange look and then pulled her closer. She wasn’t even sure he was aware he’d done the latter. “Of course. I’m not leaving you alone.”

  She did her best not to warm at the thought. He was just being protective because that was who Walker was. Nothing more.

  He held her hand once again as he led her through the wards. Since she wasn’t a wolf or Pack, she had to be led in by someone who’d invited her or the wards—and then the sentries who guarded the gates—wouldn’t let her in.

  “Will Parker be okay?” she asked softly once they were through. She had kept that question to herself not only because she didn’t know who else was around that might hear, but because she’d been afraid of the answer. What if Parker wasn’t as okay as he looked? She didn’t know anything about Healing or burns such as his—she barely understood what was going on with her.

  Walker squeezed her hand and nodded as they made their way to a small home on the outskirts of the woods that was situated right behind the clinic. She’d never been to this particular place before, so she didn’t know where she was. “He will.” Walker opened the door after pressing his palm against the scanner and gestured for her to go inside. “Come on in. We can talk for a bit. This is my place, and we’re right behind the clinic if they need us. Leah is taking over Parker’s case for now, so I can restore my reserves since that took a lot out of me. And since she’s a water witch, she’ll be able to take care of him better than I could at this point anyway.”

  Aimee nodded and stepped into Walker’s house, her gaze landing on everything at once as she tried to think about what to say. “Leah is Ryder’s mate, right? He’s the Heir?”

  “Yeah. Until Fallon, Gideon and Brie’s daughter, is older and can handle the mantle of power that comes with that. She’ll one day be the Heir, then the Alpha when the time comes. Once the next generation grows up, they slowly start to take our positions. Though I will always be a Healer, eventually, I might not be the Healer with as much connection to the wolves as I have now.”

  She wasn’t sure how he felt about that considering he kept his voice in lecture-mode, but maybe one day she would ask. Not that she was sure she had that many days left, but she wasn’t going to think about that right now.

  “Okay, so you said that you needed to replenish your reserves. What can we do for you to make that happen?” She paused, her brain finally catching up to where they were. “Oh, and did you want me to go back to Mitchell and Dawn’s? Or even my own apartment? Because if you need space, and if the Pack needs to regroup or something while they figure out what happened, I’ll totally get out of your hair.”

  Or fur.

  O
h, great, now she was making internal jokes and letting her mind wander. Being so close to Walker without anyone around was apparently making her lose part of her sanity.

  Walker cupped her cheek, forcing her brain to stop going in a thousand different directions and only focus on him. “We’re here because Dawn and Mitchell are on their way to the Centrals to ensure that there aren’t any issues there. Most of my other family members are either on patrol, trying to see what the hell happened, or with Gideon right now, forming a plan. As I’m not a fighter and in need of food to restore my energy, I’m at home. I told them I’d bring you with me so you’d be out of danger.”

  And probably out of the way, as well, but neither of them said that. She wasn’t sure where she stood with the others in the Pack, but right then, it didn’t matter. Not yet, anyway.

  “How on earth do you know all of that?”

  Walker shrugged and pulled her toward the kitchen where he started taking out fixings for a sandwich. “Some texted me what was going on, and some of the other soldiers were around when we were putting Parker in the truck and explained it to me.”

  She pushed him gently out of the way and forced him onto one of the barstools in the kitchen. “Let me make you some food. You rest.”

  “I can handle it,” he grumbled, ever the wolf.

  “It’s a sandwich. Let me help, okay? I can’t do much right now since I’m not a shifter, not Pack, and I don’t even have a freaking job, but I can help you eat. Just let me know what you want on it, and I’m there.” She hadn’t meant to blurt all of that out and sound so useless, but it wasn’t as if she could really help herself. She was so far out of her depth, it wasn’t funny.

  “I like everything I pulled out of the fridge,” Walker said patiently. He was always so damn patient…except when he had her in his arms for those few brief kisses, then, he wasn’t so unflappable.

  She was sure her cheeks were bright red, and Walker probably knew exactly what she was thinking about given his knowing look, but she ignored it.