Raw Rhythm

by Cari Quinn

  “Yeah, well, that’s just it. Even though Nicky didn’t want to toss Snake out—in fact, he was the lone holdout for the longest time—eventually, he did for the good of the band. Snake just couldn’t get and stay clean.” She sat on the edge of the coffee table. “And he was bitter. Oblivion was on the way up with his replacements and he was working crap jobs, hustling to pay for him and Chloe with a kid on the way. She was working too, but I’m sure he had dollar signs in his eyes. If he’d won that lawsuit, they would’ve been set. The ironic part? After Snake died, Chloe came to Nicky for money and he helped her. I don’t think huge amounts. Just enough to fill the gaps.”

  “She was in a tough spot. Dead fiancè, pregnant.” Mal leaned forward and rubbed his hands together. Something was niggling the back of his neck. “Wait, you did say dead? All the way dead. But you started this off saying you saw him?”

  She nodded, shutting her eyes. “On the monitor during our big secret show. It didn’t make sense so I was sure I was imagining things. But he was a unique guy. Big.” She cleared her throat. “Bald.”

  Mal lifted a brow. “You think not having hair makes all dudes look alike?”

  “No. I just said he was unique.”

  “But then you looked at me as if we were twins.”

  “No. Not even close. His eyes—something was always off there. I wondered how Chloe didn’t see it. Maybe didn’t want to. She was so young.” Ricki shuddered. “The guy I saw on the monitor that night and the guy at the salon today, both had those dead eyes.”

  “Wait a second. The salon? You better back up and tell me everything. Step by step.”

  “There isn’t much. It all happened too fast. I was in the chair, foils in, dye on, and I glanced toward the picture windows. There was a big guy in a hoodie. He wasn’t standing close to the salon, but by the curb. He was staring right at me, but the minute he saw me watching, he took off.” Ricki gripped a strand of her hair, twisting it around her fingers. “I chased him out of the salon.”

  “You did what?” Mal was halfway to his feet before he realized. “You think you spotted a dude who’s supposed to be dead—which we’ll be getting back to—and you took after him without a weapon?”

  “Hardly.” She sniffed. “I grabbed the hair dye bowl that had the rest of my color. That shit could burn his eyes and disarm him in seconds flat.”

  It definitely was the most creative weapon he’d ever heard of, he had to give her that. He wasn’t sure if it really would cause even temporary blindness, but the smell alone of some of that stuff could probably drop a dude.

  “You don’t do that again, you understand me?”

  “What was I supposed to do? Sit there and watch him walk away? I grew up with this guy. He was in and out of my house, my bedroom.”

  “Did he ever spend time there?” For once, he wasn’t asking out of possessiveness. At least not entirely.

  She wrinkled her nose. “God, no. So not my type.”

  “Yeah, you definitely hate bald guys. I’ve noticed that.”

  “You don’t all look alike, remember? Besides, if you think it was your stunning physical gifts that got me in your bed, wrong avenue to drive up, bud.” She rose and he tugged on her hand, bringing her back beside him on the couch.

  “I don’t know what it was and I don’t care. I’m just glad it did.”

  She was quiet for a full minute. “Wow, that was almost a voluntary declaration. I’m impressed. Next week we can work on harder stuff. Like ‘hi Ricki, I missed you. What did you do today?’”

  He didn’t blink as he repeated what she’d said. “Hi, Ricki, I missed you. What did you do today?”

  Her lips curved. “Tried to track down a dead guy and stun him with hair dye. Oh, and I dyed my hair because I want to get back to me and also because my very hot, very alpha lover apparently likes it.” Though she was still smiling as she laid her head on his shoulder, he felt the tremor that went through her and drew her into his side.

  “If anything happened to you, I couldn’t stand it,” he said against her hair. Just the smell of her settled him in ways he didn’t have words for. “Do you understand?”

  She tilted her head, peering up at him under the fringe of her long bangs. “I think I’m beginning to. But feel free to elaborate.”

  “I will. After we talk about a few things.” He blew out a breath. “Teagan knows how to use a gun. Do you?”

  She didn’t hesitate. “Mmm-hmm.”

  “Would you consider carrying one?” He almost couldn’t believe what he was suggesting. He didn’t normally advocate for people to carry pieces. But if she knew how and having one would mean she could better protect herself…

  “You think he’s alive, don’t you?” Her throat moved. “You don’t think it was a lookalike.”

  “I don’t know what to think yet, except a lot of fucking weird shit is going on. And much as I hate it, I can’t be with you all day and night.” He stroked her cheekbone with his thumb. “How did it happen? His death?” He almost tacked on the word supposed. That was how much he was sure she was on the right track.

  Something was very off at Ripper Records right now, and he had a feeling Snake played a role. Somehow. In some way.

  “Washed up at sea.” Her voice was barely a whisper. “Body badly decayed. I think there was an issue with the ID. I don’t know for sure. I heard a few different stories.”

  Mal just bet.

  “He was always on the beach too, wasn’t he?” It was a leap, but not all that much of one. “Born near it like you guys were.”

  “Yeah.”

  “Strong swimmer.”

  “Yes.”

  “Deceitful, duplicitous guy who very well could’ve walked away from child support by pretending he was fucking dead.”

  She didn’t reply, but she didn’t have to. Her expression said volumes.

  “How comfortable are you with a gun? Knowing how to shoot isn’t enough.”

  “Nicky taught me years ago so I could protect myself. Comfortable enough. Do you really think that’s necessary?” She didn’t even give him time to answer before nodding. “Obviously, Donovan thinks it’s necessary we have security out the wazoo, and we already lost Randy.” Her eyes grew shiny before she cleared her throat and continued. “We can’t take any chances with anyone else.”

  “Especially not you.” Mal gripped her chin. “You hear me? If anyone does anything you don’t feel comfortable with, you do what you need to do and ask questions later. If this Snake asshole is involved somehow, he helped take away one of the fathers of Jules’s baby. It wasn’t enough for him to desert his own, he also harmed another child for life. Never mind Randy himself, and Jules, and Tristan. Never mind what he did to you. What he’s still doing.”

  Her lips trembled as she nodded. “You’re right. Clearly, I’m not in the best shape right now to protect myself. But not a gun. Not yet. There has to be another option.”

  “I can meet with Donovan and see about providing you with some personal protection.”

  “Me and Teagan with our matching bodyguards.” Ricki shut her eyes then opened them again. “I don’t love it, but I’m not going to be a jerk about it. My pride isn’t as important as being safe.”

  “Damn straight it isn’t. So I’ll talk to—”

  She covered his lips with her fingers. “We’ll talk to Donovan.”

  He removed her hand from his mouth. “Yes. Didn’t I say that?”

  “Sure you did. Not.”

  He buried his face in her hair, nearly shaking with the need to burrow inside her and never let go. To shield her from the goddamned world if he had to. “If I don’t get inside you soon, I’m gonna fucking lose my mind.”

  “Yes.” She quivered too as she climbed on top of him again. “God, yes.”

  Chapter Twenty-Six

  Clothes disappeared quickly. What Elle couldn’t shed with ease herself, Mal helped her with. But even that small measure of patience disappeared as he glimpsed her push-up
bra and the tiny scrap of panties she’d worn in the hopes of getting to see this very look in his eyes as he peeled them off later.

  Feeling guilty all the while, because she’d found happiness in the center of tragedy. A victory for her, absolutely, but what about Jules and Tris? They were grieving so much, and here she was, about to lose herself in Mal. Again.

  “Don’t.”

  The soft word shook her out of her trance. She blinked down at him, shaking forward her hair so it draped over them both. Cocooning them. He gripped her jaw and brought her mouth to his, kissing her gently. More gently than she’d known he was capable of, though he had a way of surprising her.

  “Stay with me,” he said against her lips, and she knew he didn’t just mean in the apartment. He meant in the moment.

  This beautiful, perfect moment that she wouldn’t have guessed in a million years could be theirs.

  “Not going anywhere.” She dug her knees into his hips and rubbed the heel of her hand over his belly, inching low enough to tease the waistband of his boxers. The outline of his big, hard cock was making her crazy, but she wanted to take her time. To not rush through every second as if they wouldn’t get another.

  “No, you are not.”

  He rubbed his lips over hers as he teased her nipples through the cups of her bra. His calloused thumbs stroked the tight tips, making her breath catch. She tipped back her head, offering him everything.

  Even the parts of herself she’d never given away to anyone. They were his for the taking.

  He kissed his way down her throat as he filled his hands with her breasts. The hot sweep of his mouth just above the delicate fabric that held her in made her shudder. God, she was soaked already. She squirmed against him, positioning herself so she had his thick cock between her legs, just separated by a few layers of fabric.

  “Fuck, you feel good. So wet for me already.” He cupped her between her thighs and she let out a moan, closing her eyes.

  As much as she wanted this to last, she ached. So much. She rocked to get more friction on her clit as he closed his mouth around her nipple, helpless to stop clenching around nothing. Him inside her was what she needed. Maybe they could go fast first, and slow things down later—

  The door slammed against the wall. Elle jumped and would’ve fallen off Mal’s lap entirely if he hadn’t grabbed her waist, halfway righting her as two people stormed into the apartment.

  Oh dear God, there were people in the apartment, and she was naked.

  And she was related to one of them. Had shared a womb with him, in fact.

  “What the hell are you doing?” she yelled.

  “What the hell are you doing?” Nick shouted back at precisely the same time.

  Mal stared at them for a second before shaking his head and grabbing a throw off the back of the couch. “That was the weirdest, sorta cool thing I’ve ever seen in my life.” He drew the fabric around Elle, who was still glaring at her insane brother.

  She got that Nicky was overprotective. Most of the time, she even loved him for it. But keeping her from getting her horny on was the lowest of the low.

  “Twins,” Lila explained with a sigh. “And they’re fraternal. You should see my set. It’s even worse.”

  “Way too many of them around.”

  “It’s hereditary sometimes. Just so you know.”

  Since Nick was still staring at Elle, who was still staring back, Mal must’ve felt the weight of keeping this strange-as-fuck conversation going. “Um, thanks for the warning.”

  “I’m sorry I couldn’t keep the secret any longer, Ricki. I tried to call you to warn you he’d pulled the whole thing out of me and was on a tear,” Lila said. “But your phone was off.”

  Elle didn’t respond. She had other truth bombs to worry about just then.

  “Having twins is not hereditary. At least not the way Nick told you. He just wants to pretend he has super sperm.” Elle propped her fist on her hip, nearly displacing the throw.

  So what if they saw something? They were the ones who had so rudely stormed into her private sex act.

  “What are you going on about? And I want to know what you’re doing.” Nick jutted his chin at Mal. “With him, no less.”

  Lila held up a hand. “Now I want to know what you’re talking about. Twins aren’t hereditary?”

  “They are, but only in the case of fraternal ones and the genes only affect the female. So, me, yes, I could have fraternal twins. That jackass who just ruined my evening? Not so much. The reason you have twins wasn’t because of his genetic code, sorry to say. Your girls could both have fraternal twins though, because he would’ve passed on his genes to them.” Elle jerked her good shoulder. “Identical is just an egg splitting. You got lucky, Li. Or unlucky, depending how you view it. But he didn’t have a damn thing to do with it. So there.”

  Lila frowned and glanced at Nick. “Hmm.”

  Nicky, however, wasn’t paying attention. He stomped forward and stuck his finger in Elle’s face. “We are not discussing your high school biology class recollections right now. We are discussing why you are on his lap, and why apparently you have been on his lap ever since you left California.”

  “Wow, and I missed that? Damn, guess I better start paying more attention.” Mal curled his arm around her lazily and Elle smothered a smirk.

  Until Nicky turned his ire on Mal.

  “I didn’t ask you to speak. Did I? No.”

  “No, but then again, I didn’t invite you into my apartment either. How did you get in anyway?”

  “We followed someone in,” Lila explained before Nick could.

  “Seems to be the explanation of the day,” Mal said, glancing at Elle.

  She tugged the throw tighter and went back to glaring at her jerk of a twin.

  “Lila told me what was going on. She didn’t want to,” Nick added as Elle started to interrupt. “She’d been sworn to secrecy or some such shit. But I knew something was up with you, Ricki. Barely answering my texts, evasive when I call. Hardly ever initiating your own. Today at the service, all cuddled close to Mal until someone saw you. I can’t believe you. Are you really that keen on self-destruction?”

  “Watch it,” Mal growled. “You’re about to cross the line.”

  “Am I?” Nick demanded. “Or am I just telling the truth? Why else would my sister get involved with a guy who not only helped cause his fiancée’s death, but also then did favors for his ex-stepmother to make sure the story got covered up?”

  Elle jolted, either from what Nick had said or from the way Mal’s body braced as if he’d just taken a punch. “Favors? Is that what you call it when Lila pulls in her markers and insists he do her bidding?”

  “She did it to help you, for God’s sake.”

  “I know that. I know that,” Elle repeated, glancing at Lila again to soften her words. “Something else I know is all about that story. He told me already.” She shrugged again, ignoring the pain in her shoulder.

  Okay, so Mal had left out the part about the woman being his fiancée, but he’d mentioned the rest. For him, he’d practically been verbose.

  “This is a new relationship for us,” she said into the silence. “We’re not going to know every detail about each other from day one. But we’ve been in a band and lived on the same bus for the last few years, and you know, we have some people in common.” She lifted her eyebrows at Lila.

  “So that means you don’t care he apparently has a thing for people with drug issues?”

  Because she knew Nicky was upset, she gave him a pass. A hard one, and if he kept it up, his next comment was going to lead him to getting his butt thrown into the hall.

  “He told me she was an addict. There are a few of us in the world, just FYI. But you know what else? If he hadn’t told me all that yet, it would’ve been okay too.” Elle flashed her brother a saccharine-sweet smile. “Though I do have a magic vagina, I don’t consider it truth serum. If there’s stuff in his past he hasn’t told me yet, I’m
going to give him the time to do so. Just as he’s giving me that time.”

  With that said, she finally climbed off Mal’s lap and plopped down beside him on the couch. She wasn’t even sure he was still breathing. And Nicky’s face was beet-red.

  “Was magic vagina going too far?” She pretended to examine her nails. “Oh well.”

  “No, I think it was the perfect touch actually.” Lila stepped forward and gripped Nick’s arm. “We’re leaving now.”

  “No. Not yet.” Nick’s shoulders were brutally tense as he gazed at Mal. “You’ve already dealt with one dude who turned his back on you when you needed help, Ricki. You don’t need another one. Especially since he has a history of it.”

  Mal didn’t try to defend himself. He just sat there silently, as remote as a statue. Gone somewhere else in his head.

  “Yeah, Mal definitely is the sort of guy to turn his back on me. You have that exactly right.” Elle forged on even as Mal stiffened even more beside her, if that was even possible. “That’s why he was the one who kept an eye on me all night when I got drunk and took Molly in NY.”

  The expression of pure pain that crossed her brother’s face triggered an answering one inside her, and she cupped her good arm over her belly to stave it off. She had to say the rest. To get it all out.

  “I nearly went off the rails. I slipped and I fell. And if he hadn’t been there, reminding me of all I had to lose—meaning you and Li, and the girls, and my career—I probably would’ve kept falling. He didn’t have to do that. It wasn’t like I made it easy on him. But he didn’t make it easy on me either. He didn’t coddle me, because he understood the absolute last thing an addict needs is someone already believing they’re doomed to fail.”

  She stood and went to Nicky, wrapping her arms around him. He didn’t move, and he definitely didn’t return the hug.

  But she didn’t stop.

  “He helped me to see how much I have. How much I’m worth. I’m not there yet. I may never be there,” she whispered against Nick’s leather jacket. “You may hate me now, and I wouldn’t blame you. But the one thing you don’t have to doubt is that I’m still trying. I’m trying with everything I am.”