Reckless Heart (Kauffman Amish Bakery 5.5)

by Amy Clipston

  “Ya,” Lydia said. “Of course.”

  “Daniel is already calling a driver,” Mammi said, standing behind Lydia. “Beth Anne, you and Paul go to the hospital. I’ll make sure Lydia, Titus, and Irma make it there.” She hugged her daughter and whispered something in her ear, and tears splattered down Mamm’s cheeks.

  Lydia sucked in a breath to prevent herself from crying. She had to be strong for her parents and for her siblings, but inwardly she was falling apart. When will I wake up from this nightmare?

  “Beth Anne!” Dat called from the front door. “We must go now.”

  “Go,” Mammi said, squeezing Mamm’s hand. “We’ll be there soon.”

  Mamm rushed out the front door, and Lydia moved to the window to watch her parents leave. The sight of their climbing into an ambulance with her baby sister on a gurney was completely surreal.

  Soon the ambulance pulled out of the driveway and its sirens blared as the vehicle reached the road at the end of the driveway.

  “The driver is on his way, but he was on the other side of town running some errands,” her uncle Daniel called. “He’s going to be delayed, but he said he’d rush over.”

  Lydia looked up at her uncle. “I know how to get us a ride right away. My English freind lives down the street. I bet he could give us a ride right now, and you could come later in your driver’s van.”

  “That’s a wunderbaar idea,” Daniel said. “Let’s go ask him.”

  Lydia and Daniel hurried down the road toward Tristan’s house. She spotted Tristan in the driveway under the hood of his car, and she rushed to him.

  “Tristan,” she called. “Tristan, we need help. It’s an emergency.”

  Tristan looked up with a surprised expression. “Hey, Lydia. What’s up?” He looked at her uncle. “What’s wrong?”

  “My sister …” Lydia worked to calm the quiver in her voice. “An ambulance just took her to the hospital, and my uncle Daniel and I need someone to drive me and my siblings there to meet them. Can you help? We’ll pay you for your gas and time. Please, Tristan. We’re desperate.” She folded her hands as if to beg.

  “Of course we’ll help you. That’s what neighbors are for.” Tristan dropped the tool in his hand onto a nearby workbench and grabbed a red rag. “Let me go talk to my father. He has a big SUV that would hold quite a few people. I’ll be right back.”

  Tristan hurried into the house, and Lydia and Daniel stood in the driveway. She hugged her arms to her chest. Her body shook with worry.

  “Ruthie will be fine,” Daniel said. “I believe the doctors will take gut care of her, and God is watching over her.”

  Afraid she might cry, Lydia looked up at him and nodded.

  The back door opened and slammed shut as Tristan and an older man with the same dark hair and eyes rushed down the stairs.

  “Lydia, this is my father, James Anderson,” Tristan said. “And this is Mr. Daniel …?”

  “Kauffman,” Daniel said, holding out his hand. “It’s nice to meet you. We appreciate your help very much.”

  Mr. Anderson shook his hand and then motioned toward a large SUV parked in front of the garage. “I’d be happy to take you and your family to the hospital. Let’s climb in.”

  Tristan, Lydia, and Daniel headed toward the truck.

  “Dad,” Tristan said. “Should I wait for Mom and drive her car up to Lydia’s house so we can help take their other family members to the hospital?”

  Lydia smiled. How thoughtful of Tristan to offer another car to help my family.

  “That’s a good idea,” Mr. Anderson said. “Or wait.” He handed Tristan the keys. “You take Lydia and some of her family, and I’ll wait for your mother and bring the car up to the house to make another trip.”

  Tristan’s eyes widened in surprise. “You’re going to let me take your truck?”

  “Yes.” James nudged Tristan toward the SUV. “Now go.”

  Lydia climbed into the backseat while Daniel hopped into the front passenger seat. They drove in silence to her house, and she rushed out of the truck to the back porch where her siblings and family members were waiting. Daniel also exited the truck and stood by the porch.

  “Tristan is going to take us to the hospital,” Lydia said to her siblings. “Quick, get into the truck.” She looked at her grandmother. “Will you come too? There’s plenty of room.”

  Her grandmother, her grandfather, her aunt Kathryn, Amanda, Irma, and Titus all piled into the SUV, and Lydia sat up front in the passenger seat by Tristan. While they drove to the hospital, her grandparents spoke encouraging words quietly to Titus and Irma.

  Lydia glanced over at Tristan, who kept his eyes focused on the road. “Thank you for helping us,” she said. “I’ll make sure you’re paid for your time. You’re truly making a sacrifice by dropping everything to help my family.”

  Tristan gave her a sideways glance. “I won’t accept your money, Lydia. I meant what I said before — we help our neighbors. That’s how I was brought up and I believe every word.”

  “Thank you,” Lydia said, wiping a stray tear that had escaped her eyes.

  “You’re welcome,” he said, stopping at a red light. “I’m just glad my dad allowed me to take his Excursion. He’s very protective of it, but I know he would do anything to help a neighbor in need too. And my mother should be home soon—she took Michaela into town for new shoes. I think she could get four people comfortably into her car.”

  “We appreciate that very much,” Lydia said. “When my uncle’s driver was delayed, I thought of coming to ask you for help. But I never expected you to help this much.”

  “What happened to your sister? If you don’t mind my asking, that is,” Tristan said as he accelerated through the intersection.

  “We’re not certain what’s wrong, but she had trouble breathing,” Lydia said. “Her lips turned blue.”

  Tristan’s expression was solemn. “I’m so sorry. I hope she’s better soon.”

  “Thank you,” Lydia said.

  They drove in silence for the remainder of the ride to the hospital. When they reached the hospital parking lot, Tristan pulled up to the emergency room drop-off.

  Lydia turned to Tristan as she unbuckled her seat belt. “Thank you again. You’ve really helped my family today.”

  “You’re welcome,” he said.

  Lydia’s grandfather, Eli, came around to Tristan’s window and tapped on the glass. “Thank you, young man, for the ride.” He held up a few bills. “This is for your time and gas.”

  “I can’t accept that, sir,” Tristan said, shaking his head. “I’m just happy I could help you out.”

  Eli shook his head. “I would like you to take the money.”

  “I can’t,” Tristan said. “I don’t charge friends.”

  Her grandfather shook Tristan’s hand. “Thank you, son.” He looked at Lydia. “You have a gut freind.”

  Lydia smiled. “Ya, I do, Daadi.” She opened the door. “Thank you again.”

  “Lydia!” Amanda called from the sidewalk. “Dummle!”

  Lydia jumped down from the seat, took Irma’s hand, and fell in step with Amanda and Titus as they moved through the whooshing automatic glass doors into the large waiting area. Her aunt and grandparents followed closely behind her.

  A large desk sat in the middle of the room, where a woman in a uniform sat next to a phone that seemed to ring nonstop. Groups of people and children sat in the clusters of chairs spread around the large, open area, and flat television screens hung from the walls.

  Lydia scanned the sea of people for her parents and found them sitting in a secluded corner, talking quietly. She rushed over to them, pulling Irma alongside her. “How’s Ruthie?”

  “We don’t know yet,” her mother said with a frown. “They’re running some tests and will call us in when they’re done.”

  Her grandfather touched Mamm’s arm and gave her an encouraging nod. “I’m certain everything will be just fine, Beth Anne.”


  Lydia sat down and spotted a children’s storybook on the small table in front of her. “Irma,” she said. “Grab that book and I’ll read it to you while we wait.”

  Irma retrieved the book, and Lydia pulled the little girl onto her lap. She began reading a story about a little bear that was afraid to go to school.

  Soon a woman in pink scrubs came over to their group. “Mr. and Mrs. Bontrager, would you please come back with me? Ruthie is asking for you. You can be with her while we’re waiting for the results of the tests.”

  Lydia’s parents stood, and her mother looked over at Lydia. “Will you be okay?”

  Mammi touched Lydia’s arm. “We’ll take gut care of the kinner. You just go care for Ruthie.”

  Lydia bit her lip while she watched her parents disappear through the double doors with the nurse. Then she continued reading to Irma to try to relieve the tension.

  Amanda dropped into the chair beside her and rubbed Irma’s arm once the story was over. “What can I do for you, Lydia?”

  Lydia shook her head. “I don’t know.” Her world was spinning out of control and she had no idea what would make it any better other than good news about her sister’s condition.

  Kathryn stepped over to them. “What if we went to get something to drink? You must be thirsty after rushing around.”

  “I don’t want to leave,” Lydia said. “I don’t want to miss my parents if they come out and have news to share about Ruthie.”

  Amanda looked up at her mother. “We’ll go get you something, right, Mamm?”

  “Ya,” Kathryn said. “That’s a gut idea. We’ll bring back something for everyone. Just let us know what you want to drink.”

  Titus looked up at their aunt. “You’re going to the cafeteria?”

  “Ya,” Kathryn said, pushing his hair back. “I was thinking that you might be thirsty.”

  Titus looked hopeful. “Could I possibly get something to eat?”

  “Didn’t you have lunch?” Kathryn asked.

  “Ya,” he said. “But I’m still hungry.”

  “Ya,” Kathryn said, touching his shoulder. “We’ll get you something to eat.” She turned to Lydia. “What can we bring back for you?”

  Lydia shrugged. “I guess some iced tea or water.”

  “Okay.” Kathryn looked at her parents. “What about you?”

  After everyone had put in their requests, Amanda, Kathryn, and Titus headed toward the desk to ask where they could find the cafeteria, and soon they disappeared from the waiting room.

  Her grandparents sat together on a small sofa and spoke to each other quietly while a news program sounded from the television suspended on the wall in front of them. Lydia rubbed Irma’s back and hummed to her while she looked across the waiting room at the other groups of people. Her mind swirled with questions and worries for her sister.

  Soon the doors opened with another whoosh and another group of friends and relatives stepped through the doors. Lydia saw her uncle David, her aunt Rebecca, and her cousins moving toward her. Her heart flip-flopped when she saw Joshua’s face in the group. His eyes searched the waiting area and then settled on her, looking concerned.

  Joshua crossed the waiting room and stood in front of Lydia. “How’s Ruthie?”

  “We don’t know yet.” Lydia fiddled with Irma’s long braids. “My parents are back there with her, but we haven’t heard anything yet. I know they’ve run some tests. We’re waiting for the results.”

  He dropped into the chair next to Lydia. “I got here as soon as I heard the news. I’m sorry I wasn’t there when the ambulance came. A group of us were playing volleyball and it took us awhile to notice everyone was leaving and heading to your farm.”

  “It’s okay,” Lydia said, looking down at Irma, who was squirming.

  “I want to get up,” Irma said, sitting up straight. “My back hurts.” She looked across the waiting room and her eyes lit up when another group of relatives came into the waiting room. “Can I go over there and sit with them?”

  “Ya,” Lydia said. “Just listen to Aenti Sadie. Remember we need to behave in the hospital.”

  Irma nodded.

  Their grandparents exchanged looks and then stood.

  “Irma,” Mammi began, “we’ll walk over with you and let the adults know what’s going on.”

  Irma took Mammi’s hand and they headed over to the family and friends who were waving to them. They found a large open area of empty seats and sat down together while the children stared wide-eyed at the television.

  Lydia was thankful the community had come to support her family, but she didn’t feel like talking with them. Sitting alone with Joshua was all she craved at the moment instead of a barrage of questions she couldn’t answer.

  Joshua reached over and took Lydia’s hand in his. “How are you?” His skin was rough from his hard work on his father’s farm, but it was also warm and comforting.

  Lydia shook her head with confusion. “I don’t know how I am. I feel sort of numb while I sit here waiting to see what happens next. Lately my life is a series of stressful events tied together by the rising and setting sun.” She studied his handsome face and longed for the air to be cleared between them. “Why are you here?”

  His eyes studied hers. “Why do you think?”

  “I didn’t think you cared,” she whispered.

  “You’re wrong,” Joshua said, squeezing her hand. “I do care and I told you that the other night when we talked. I’ve always cared.”

  “I’m glad to hear that,” Lydia said. “Who drove you here?”

  “Daniel’s driver brought a group in his van, and Mr. Anderson brought a few of us in his wife’s car,” Joshua said, leaning back in the chair. “Your English freind is bringing another group of church members out in his father’s big truck. He went back to the house to pick up more people. He called his dat to tell him he’d be back to get another group.”

  “Tristan’s making another trip?” Lydia asked.

  “That’s what I said.”

  She smiled. “He’s a very nice person.”

  Joshua seemed to frown. “His dat wanted me to tell you that Tristan would be back to check on the family after making another run. I think he and his father are going to come up to see how everyone is.”

  “That’s really thoughtful,” Lydia said. Then they were silent, and she stared up at the television screen. But the news program was only background noise to her worries. She was thankful to have the reassurance of Joshua’s warm hand.

  Lydia looked across the waiting area. It warmed her heart to see members of her family and her church waiting for news of her sister. She studied Irma as she sat with her cousins, talking quietly and smiling. She hoped that someday she would see Ruthie at school, learning to read and write in the classroom and talking and giggling with her cousins and friends on the playground. Lydia wanted to see Ruthie in her classroom, smiling at Lydia from her little desk.

  Then it hit her like a thousand bales of hay falling from the loft in the barn: Lydia did want to be the teacher. She could see herself in front of the class, leading them in their recitation of the multiplication tables. Although she’d doubted that she belonged in the classroom full time, she now knew she did want to be there instead of in the bakery every day.

  The realization was overwhelming, causing Lydia to suck in a deep breath.

  “Are you okay?” Joshua asked, his voice soft and smooth in her ear, sending warmth cascading down her spine.

  “Ya,” Lydia said. “I was just thinking about Ruthie and hoping she would someday be in school with the rest of the children.”

  “I think she will be,” Joshua said, squeezing her hand again. “Just have faith.”

  “I do,” she said. “I really do.”

  He sat up straight and gestured across the room. “Your parents.”

  Dropping her grip on his hand, Lydia jumped up and headed toward her mother and father, who stood with the large group of family members and frien
ds in the center of the waiting room.

  21

  While her mother frowned, her father rubbed her back and spoke to everyone who’d come to offer support.

  Lydia approached her parents with Joshua right behind her. “What’s going on?” she asked, her voice sounding thin and foreign to her.

  “Lydia,” her mother said, turning to her. “Kumm.” She took Lydia’s hand and led her back toward the big double doors. “Ruthie has double pneumonia. It’s a very serious case.”

  Lydia gripped her mother’s hand. “What are they going to do?”

  Mamm nodded at a nurse sitting behind the counter, and then the doors opened automatically. “Kumm,” she said.

  Her mother pulled Lydia into a busy hallway. Women and men dressed in similar nursing smocks and pants and clad in white coats with their names embroidered on them moved past each other, all rushing as if they needed to take care of a very important patient.

  “How are they going to make her better?” Lydia asked.

  Mamm kept her eyes glued to the hallway in front of them. “The doctor has called Ruthie’s cancer doctor, and he wants to move her to Hershey once she’s stable.”

  “Stable?” Lydia asked.

  “She’s having a very hard time breathing,” Mamm said. “They have her on oxygen and she’s getting an IV of very strong medicine. Once she seems to be breathing better and has some medicine in her, they’ll move her.”

  Lydia felt her lips tremble, but she willed herself to be strong for her mother. She didn’t want to cause her mother more stress.

  “This is her room,” Mamm said, stopping in front of a doorway. “She’s asked for you, which is why I came to get you. I need you to promise me you’ll be as strong as you can be, ya?”

  Lydia took a deep, cleansing breath while wondering if her mother had read her thoughts. “I’ll do my best.”

  “Gut.” Mamm took both of Lydia’s hands and squeezed them. “Ruthie is going to be okay. Just remember that and try your best to smile and act like you’re certain she’ll be just fine. This is the best way we can keep her faith strong.”