Sad Love

by Mj Fields

  Thursday night she pulled up and texted him. He walked out with the dart girl and the body shot girl walking behind him.

  “Tessa come here, please,” she was pissed and got out, “These ladies have something to tell you.”

  They told her they knew she and Lucas were engaged and that they were just friends.

  “So when you licked salt off his neck you knew he was living with me and engaged to me?” Tessa asked and she shook her head yes.

  “And when you called him hot buns as I was hugging him, you knew that as well?” she also shook her head yes.

  “Lucas dear, do me a favor,” she said and he knew she was pissed. “Don’t bring bar trash out on the street it’ll dirty your reputation, and don’t you ever again think it’s alright to discuss you and I with nasty bar whores.”

  “Who do you think you are?” body shot girl screamed.

  “Someone with a lot more class than you’ll ever have,” Tessa turned to walk away.

  “You might want to shut your mouth bitch,” she said to Tessa.

  “You may want to bring more than this bitch over here to help you,” Tessa turned back and stomped towards them.

  The guys walked out and grabbed the body shot girl.

  “Tessa, get in the vehicle,” Lucas was mad.

  “Goodbye bitches,” Tessa got in the driver’s seat.

  Everyone else climbed in. He looked at her.

  “What was that?” he asked.

  “Just like I said Lucas, don’t bring trash to me,” she hissed through her teeth.

  “What makes …” he started and she cut him off.

  “You really don’t want to do this right now,” Tessa warned.

  “Let’s do it, I was trying to show you that it was nothing,” he warned.

  “And you’re wrong” she said, “Haven’t you learned by now not to push dirty ass bitches in my face? Oh no you haven’t! I’d never been in a fight in my life and I had defend myself against all sorts of crazy, so forgive me Lucas if I didn’t greet them with open arms.” she looked at him, “are you embarrassed Lucas? Because I certainly am.”

  “Sorry Tessa,” he whispered.

  “I know,” she said. “You and your friends will need to find another ride, I won’t be going back there.”

  They dropped the boys off and they thanked her. They drove home in silence. They got out and walked in the house. She went to the bathroom and washed her face and brushed her teeth.

  “Tessa I’m sorry, I wasn’t thinking,” he said looking down.

  “Okay Lucas,” she said and walked by.

  “I’m trying Tessa,” he said quietly.

  “Well two more weeks Lucas, and you won’t have to be bothered anymore,” she said and walked in the room and shut the door.

  She sat on the bed and buried her head in the pillows and screamed.

  Lucas walked in.

  “Tessa I miss you and I need you and not just for two more weeks.”

  “What do you need, Lucas?”

  “Can you just tell me it’s going to be alright?”

  “How am I supposed to know what it’s going to be?”

  “Tessa… come sleep with me, I want to hold you, I miss you.”

  “Lucas you need to get laid. So here,” she said taking off her clothes, “Have at it!”

  His jaw dropped and he closed his eyes.

  “That’s not what I was asking for Tessa,” he swallowed hard.

  “That’s what you want, though,” she said and grabbed him. “Right Lucas this is what you want.”

  She undid his pants and pulled them off of him. She grabbed the back of his shirt and pulled it over his head. He was trying to steady his breathing.

  “Right here Lucas ?”

  “Tessa stop,” he said, “That’s not what I was asking.”

  She grabbed his hand and led him to his room.

  “I just want to hold you.”

  He went and brushed his teeth.

  He walked out and she was going through the bag of toys.

  “How about this Lucas ? Am I a dirty enough bitch now to entertain you?” she asked and opened the package with her teeth and turned it on.

  She laid back in bed and opened her legs,

  “Will this make you want me and only me, will this make you not want all that attention from all the women you surround yourself with Lucas , will it?” she asked and started to tear up. “Come on Lucas, get over here.” Tears rolled down her face.

  He sat on the bed and took the vibrator from her and dropped it on the floor. He laid next to her and covered her up. He wrapped his arm around her and pulled her into him and kissed her. She pulled away.

  “Just fuck me and get it over with!” she snapped.

  He kissed her, “I love you.”

  Lucas kissed away her tears.

  “I love you” he said again.

  He continued to kiss her and tell her he loved her until she wrapped her arms around him and fell asleep.

  She woke up in the morning and tried to sneak out of bed.

  He held her tighter, “I love you Tessa.”

  He rolled her over so she was facing him. She put her head against his chest and took a deep breath. She got up and walked to her room and got dressed and walked into the kitchen and grabbed a bowl of cereal and sat on the counter. He walked downstairs and looked at her.

  “Tessa…”

  “Lucas ,” she said. “Do you want cereal?”

  “No thank you,” he sat next to her. “Is that all you eat anymore?”

  “It’s fine, I don’t need a variety,” she said smugly.

  “Can I take you out to dinner tonight?”

  “No actually I think I’m going to drive home after class, I miss my family.”

  “Can I come with you?”

  “Why Lucas ?” she asked rolling her eyes.

  “Because I want to see you happy.”

  “Then you…” she stopped, “It would be uncomfortable.”

  “Okay, can I take you out to lunch?”

  “You have class,” she said.

  “I don’t want to go, it’s just review.”

  “Finals are next week” she said quietly. “You’ve worked hard, don’t screw it up”

  He smiled, “I’ve been screwing up far more important things than that.”

  She looked at him, “Don’t do that.”

  “Do what Tessa?”

  “Don’t put that on me,” she said looking down.

  “I didn’t say you were screwing things up, I said I was,” he looked sincerely into her eyes.

  She looked away.

  “Tessa I know I have said this a hundred times but I really am sorry, I get too comfortable and things get messed up.”

  “So you should be uncomfortable, on edge? How will that make you happy? That sounds like a pretty sad life.”

  “Tessa are you finished with me?” he swallowed hard.

  She looked down and shook her head no.

  “I don’t like feeling like this, I don’t like being angry and jealous and mad about my actions and myself. I don’t like you feeling that way either. Have you ever thought that maybe we should take a break and maybe… I don’t know Lucas see if there is something else out there that would make you happier? You seem to like having someone around all the time now, maybe you need to try a real relationship with someone else and see if it’s really me or just the relationship that you love.”

  “You’re not being serious, are you?” he asked trying to figure out what she was saying.

  “Well I just thought about it but I’d rather know now, than five years down the road wouldn’t you?”

  “No Tessa I wouldn’t,” his jaw set.

  “Well Lucas neither one of us should feel like this. I have to drop you off at a bar when I take an hour lesson so that you can do whatever it is you do there?”

  “I won’t go anymore,” his response was quick.

  “That’s not what I meant, obvious
ly our relationship is lacking if you…” she stopped, “I’m sooo sick of hearing myself talk when all I’m doing is thinking out loud, problem solving. I need to get some things done, and you need to eat something before class.”

  She laughed and grabbed cereal out of the cabinet and made him a bowl.

  “Tessa I am not hu…” he started and she shoved a spoon full in his mouth.

  “It’s very good,” she laughed.

  She shoveled a bigger spoon full in his mouth and he smiled at her. “I love your smile.”

  He swallowed, “I love you.”

  Lucas grabbed her and hugged her. She breathed and wrapped her arms around him.

  “I love you Lucas,” she said and he held her closer.

  “I can’t lose you, Tessa.”

  “It shouldn’t be like this,” Tess looked up at him, “Why is it?”

  “I told you before, if it’s worth having, it’s worth fighting for,” He frowned. “I love you so much, Tessa. You’re precious to me. I promise,” he turned her face back to him, “I promise to do better. Let me do better.”

  Lucas kissed her softly on her nose. He kissed her ear and then her neck, “I can do better Baby, let me show you.”

  The sound of his voice, heavied her heart. The touch of his lips, the heat in his eyes, and the way he moved closer to her body. His softness lifted her fear of losing. His kisses deepened and she pulled back and closed her eyes.

  “Can I take you out to dinner tonight?”

  “Yes please, because that stuff is awful,” he smiled softly.

  “It’s good for you.”

  “I don’t think it could possibly be,” his smile deepened.

  “Do we have to do dinner before we have sex?”

  He laughed, “No.”

  “Good, it’s been an awful few weeks” she quickly took off his shirt.

  “Dreadful,” he took hers off.

  “Horrible,” she pulled her bottoms off.

  “Horrendous,” stepped out of his.

  “Lucas do you have to make love to me or could you fuck me until I can’t walk?” she laughing and she jumped up in his arms.

  “I want to make love, but after you take me out to dinner, I promise to do the other,” he smiled and they ran upstairs.

  When they finished they both laid in bed and smiled looking at each other.

  “I’m very lucky that you love me, I want you to know that I’m aware of that.”

  “Lucas I feel the same, until we fight, and then I get so pissed.”

  “We can make this work,” he said. “So dinner tonight and your family’s this weekend?”

  “You’ll go with me?”

  “Yes, Tessa. That’s where I want to be. With you” He kissed her and put her ring back on her finger. “Please don’t ever take this off again.”

  CHAPTER 19

  “Thank you for doing this,” Tessa said and kissed him as they walked into the restaurant to meet Ben and his girlfriend.

  Lucas smiled, and wrapped his arm around her waist.

  “Hey Tess,” she heard from behind and she smiled and turned around.

  “Hi Ben,” she hugged him.

  She looked at the beautiful tall blonde standing next to him.

  “You’re beautiful,” Tessa hugged her.

  "Well thank you," she laughed.

  “Tessa this is Oxona and this is Lucas” Ben said, and they shook hands.

  “Nice to meet you,” Lucas she hugged him.

  “You too, Lucas.”

  They ate dinner and talked about Europe; they had met in London at school and have traveled across Europe. On every break, they would backpack or ride the train to a different country. Her family was from Germany, and he’d spent a lot of time there. They ate dessert and decided to go dancing. Ben asked Lucas if he could dance with Tessa, and he agreed and danced with Oxona.

  “Wow, you look so happy Ben,” Tessa smiled.

  “I am Tess, she’s amazing,” he smiled.

  “I’m so glad, I don’t get crazy creepy vibes from her either,” she laughed.

  “Thank God,” Ben chuckled, “And you Tess, are you happy?”

  “Yes,” she smiled. “Things are good.”

  “Is he the one forever?”

  “That’s the plan,” she giggled.

  “You make sure he doesn’t crush you,” he eyes shown worry. “I know people change and that he loves you, but you deserve the best, Tess.”

  “Thank you Ben. So do you,” she closed her eyes and swallowed.

  “What was that?”

  “What?”

  “Are you sure you’re alright?”

  “Of course,” she said. “Ben, I want you to be happy.”

  “I really am Tess, but if you have doubts about you and him I need to know,” he said.

  She smiled, “I don’t”.

  “Alright then,” he smiled back.

  The summer went by quickly. Kendall had graduated, and Tess and Lucas helped move her to Albany, to Pharmacy school. Sydney was walking and had to be one of the happiest little girls in the world. Jade and Ryan were having their second child. Alex had proposed to Phoebe. And Jake was going to be a junior, and he was amazing at everything he did. He had a girlfriend who was two years older than him, but then again Jake had many since she could remember. Becca was engaged as well, and Cassidy was dating a guy she met at college.

  They hosted another season beginning party at their house and then football was in full swing. Lucas spent a lot of time at the gym, and they spent every Saturday at his games. Sundays they spent on the couch watching NFL teams and the recorded college games from the previous week. Tessa would cook and clean and do laundry as he and his friend watched the games. She always went home the weekend before hunting season and cleaned and cooked with her mother. Landon, Audri, and the girls came to every home game and so did his mother, and Bob. They were engaged and getting married on Christmas Eve.

  Tessa continued her lessons, and she and Adam were very close. Lucas had given her tickets for Adam and his daughter to come to a game and although football wasn’t Adam’s thing, he came.

  Jade and Ryan welcomed their little girl into the world on Valentines Day which seemed very fitting, they were an amazing couple. Tessa and Lucas were there for the birth and also God parents to Riley May Brooks. Spring break they spent with Landon, Audri and the girls skiing in Aspen.

  ~

  “Tessa,” Lucas yelled as he walked in the door.

  She ran down the stairs, “Is everything alright?”

  "It's more than alright," he lifted her up and spun her around.

  “Okay tell me,” she laughed.

  “How would you feel about moving to Cortland?”

  She smiled, “I would love to but why?”

  “Coach Brown called me down today, and the Jets want me, baby,” he smiled.

  “Are you serious?”

  “Yes and they’re training at Cortland State this summer,” he said gushing. “Isn’t that perfect?”

  “Yes it is pretty perfect,” she hugged him. “I am so happy for you.”

  “For us baby, happy for us,” He smiled and kissed her.

  “What about school?”

  “Online courses and the short spring sessions.”

  “You’ve gotten it all figured out,” she said and smiled.

  “I do and as long as you’re with me, everything will be perfect. Oh and will you please marry me sooner?”

  She smiled, “Of course”

  “Christmas time?”

  “Lucas, that’s football season,” she laughed. Lucas was beaming, he was doing it, living his dream and she couldn’t have been happier for him.

  “Okay Spring break?”

  “We’ll figure it out; let’s enjoy this victory right now. We should go to Jersey this weekend and surprise your family.”

  “Sounds amazing,” he smiled and traced her lips with his fingers.

  “You just made a touchdown, huh?�
�� she bit his finger lightly.

  “I just made ten,” he kissed her and looked down.

  She smiled and kissed down his chest.

  Lucas laughed, “Touchdown!”

  ~

  Tessa got done packing, and he walked in.

  “Change of plans baby.”

  “What’s going on?”

  “They are coming up for the weekend, so I thought that we could invite your family over and tell them all together,” he smiled.

  “You’re so sweet.”

  “Because of you, besides ten, hours in a vehicle is a waste when we could spend it here celebrating” he smiled. “But first I want to go see my Mother, is that alright?”

  “Of course, let’s go now,” she smiled.

  “How about we stay here for awhile,” he grabbed her.

  “Alright,” she laughed.

  She was so happy for him, and he was ecstatic!

  ~

  Kate was extremely happy for Lucas, and she hugged Tessa and thanked her.

  They stopped to see Ryan and Jade.

  Tessa held Riley as Lucas and Lukie played.

  “Links, we’re looking into buying a house so if you guys want this place you should take it.”

  “No, this is your place is yours.”

  “No, it’s not Lucas we appreciate it but have saved more than enough to buy our own home.”

  “Buy this place, then,” Lucas suggested.

  “I don’t know if we can afford this.”

  Tessa looked at Jade, and she smiled.

  “You want to move?” Tessa whispered.

  “No, we love it here, but enough charity,” Jade smiled.

  “Alright so what are you looking at?” Lucas asked.

  They showed him some homes they had looked at and Lucas looked confused.

  “You really want to leave this for those places?” he laughed.

  “Lucas,” Tessa said and shot him a look.

  “What? They should just buy this place, you don’t want to move do you Lukie? I will cut you a sweet deal as long as you agree that if you sell the kids get ten percent each in their college fund.”

  “We would have to start those first,” Jade laughed.

  “No, you don’t, we already did," Lucas laughed.

  Tessa smiled and looked down, “Yeah, we did.”