Unable to Resist

by Cassie Graham

  Aiden and I jump off our horses and rush to the hurt mare.

  Powerless to get up, Belle’s front leg is wrapped around the metal fence.

  “She’s struggling, brother. What should we do?” Aiden asks as he pulls a flashlight out of his back pocket and shines the light on the black mare.

  The trees offer a bit of help, it’s pouring now, but I’m still able to see. Her eyes look scared, so I bend down and stroke her face. “Shh, girl.”

  Aiden walks around to the back of the horse. “Uhhh, Duane. She’s giving birth. I see a foot back here.”

  My head whips around and, sure enough, she’s beginning to foal, and we don’t have any time left to get her out of the fence. It’s do or die, right now. Save the baby, and then save her. I can’t lose both. “Alright, let’s do this.”

  “Aiden, grab the gloves, it’s coming, we don’t have any time.”

  Belle is screaming, from giving birth or from her foot being caught in the fence I don’t know, but I recoil every time. I hate seeing animals in pain. Her breaths become labored and she stops pushing.

  “Dammit, we’re going to have to pull the foal out, Aiden,” I yell.

  I count to three and, as gently as possible, I pull while Aiden keeps Belle calm. The feet come first, then the head between its feet. Belle thankfully gives one last push and the rest of the foal falls out effortlessly. With a thud, the small filly falls to the ground.

  “It’s a girl, baby brother.”

  Aiden’s eyes shine at my update.

  Doesn’t matter how many times I’ve seen a horse give birth, I’m always in awe of the work of nature.

  Unlike anything I’ve seen before, the filly shakes her head and clumsily walks to Belle. Belle stops her crying and looks up at her baby. For a few seconds they stare at each other, the baby licks Belle’s face and Belle lays her head down. She stops struggling and breathes slowly.

  I approach the horses and wait. I don’t want to spook the little filly, and I don’t want to distress Belle any more. Aiden calmly walks behind me, and the baby lies down with her head on Belle’s neck. I wouldn’t believe it if I hadn’t seen it first-hand.

  Taking a deep breath, I turn to Aiden. “Sit down, keep her calm, please.”

  He nods in agreement and I turn to Simon. Despite his normal demeanor, Simon is calmly eating a bush as I walk up to him. He’s soaked from the rain, but both him and Leo are acting like this is a standard occurrence for them.

  Thank God something is going okay.

  Grabbing the wire cutters I keep in my saddlebag, I hope I can get Bell cut out of the fence.

  The two horses and Aiden are peacefully sitting in the rainstorm when I approach. I bend down and pet Belle’s face and nuzzle the new filly’s nose. She is the calmest baby I’ve ever seen. I give a kiss to Belle’s head.

  When I get to where the fence and Belle are one, my stomach rolls. It looks really bad. She somehow got a piece of wire stuck through her foot. I’m going to have to cut around it and pull it out. I tear off my shirt to make a tourniquet that I know I’m going to need. “Aiden, did you bring your phone?”

  He digs into his pocket and produces his cell.

  I breathe a sigh of relief. “Great, call Sam. Ask him to hook my truck up to the horse trailer; she won’t be able to walk back. We’re going to have to haul her.” I softly rub the caught foot, and Belle flinches. “It’s alright, girl.”

  As fast as humanly possible, I cut the wires. Almost like she knows what’s going to happen, Belle whinnies just a bit, takes a big breath, lays her head down and closes her eyes.

  With a strong grip, I pull the wire out. The filly nudges Belle’s head, and Belle doesn’t make a sound. I wrap my shirt around her foot, and rub her neck. “You did it, girl. Good job.”

  Sam pulls up with the truck and trailer, and Aiden and I high five each other.

  The three of us load Belle and the filly into the truck. And, Belle does great considering she had to walk on three legs.

  “Drive slow,” I tell Sam.

  He curtly nods, and hops into the truck. His solemn eyes are a dead giveaway he blames himself. I grab his forearm. “Sam, this isn’t your fault.”

  He shudders a bit when Belle whinnies from the trailer. “Then whose fault is it? I should have been there.”

  I shake my head, with my mouth in a thin line. “No, you got sick. You couldn’t help it. Whoever did this, the person let them out, and it’s their fault. You didn’t do this.”

  Sam nods, but seems unconvinced. When I step away from the truck, he shuts the door, and the truck roars to life.

  When they pull away, I turn to Aiden as he hops up on Leo.

  He has a stupid smile on his face, which is not all that odd.

  “What?” I ask, looking around.

  The rain has stopped, and he takes his phone out of his pocket.

  “I think I should take a picture and send it to your girl,” he jokes.

  I give him a confused look and put my foot in the stirrup to mount Simon. Aiden rolls his eyes and motions at my shirtless chest. In the heat of the moment, I’d forgotten my shirt had been used to tend to Belle. I scoff, and flip him off. “Shut up.”

  The sun has set, and the moon provides light through the clearing clouds as we slowly walk back to the ranch. The only sounds of the night are the horses’ hooves crunching on leaves and our steady breathing.

  “So, I know you and Ann are together, but what the hell, man?” Aiden starts. “I thought you were done with women.”

  I shrug my shoulders. “She’s different. I can’t explain it.”

  Actually, I can. She’s fucking wonderful. She makes me want to be a better person. She really sees me. Saying that to my little brother might make me sound like a pussy, so I’ll keep the whipped-talk to myself.

  Aiden takes off his hat, and sets it on the horn of his saddle. “So, she’s nothing like Lauren?”

  I cringe at the sound of her name. “No, the total opposite. Ann is warm and kind. She sees the beauty in the world, looks for the best in everyone. Lauren was a conceited and selfish human being. There isn’t a single selfish bone in Ann’s body.”

  “I saw her at the grocery store yesterday,” Aiden admits, almost guilty.

  I groan in annoyance. I don’t have to ask who ‘her’ is. “You did?”

  “Yeah, she said she called you the day you left with Ann. She seemed pretty pissed that you left with her.” Aiden repositions himself in his saddle and slowly moves his gaze away from me.

  “I don’t understand why she gives a shit.”

  Aiden rolls his head from side to side. “She says she doesn’t like Ann. She’s been to her bakery. Met her and got a bad vibe.” Aiden turns his nose up.

  She would get a bad vibe from Ann, simply because Ann is nothing like her. Women like Lauren want spineless friends—friends who’ll agree with everything they say and do. Ann is not that woman. It doesn’t surprise me she found an enemy in Ann.

  “I don’t really care, to be honest, brother. She’s history. We’re done. Hell, we never really had anything serious.”

  She’d tell you a different story, though. She had a bad habit of making things a bigger deal than they really were.

  “She’s called a few times in the past week and I haven’t answered. I’m with Ann, she’s my future,” I state without a fleck of doubt. “Lauren needs to back off.”

  Aiden nods. “Does she know that? She works with you, dude.”

  I hope not for long. I’m ready to quit and be done with that life.

  Lauren is the receptionist, and I’m seriously second-guessing hiring her. She’s a nuisance.

  “I’m sure she knows. The last time I talked to her, I told her to stop calling me. If that isn’t a clear enough signal that we’re completely over, the woman might be blind or deaf.”

  The barn is in sight and I hop off of Simon to pull my phone out. “I’m going to call Ann. I’ll see you in the house.”

  Ai
den salutes, clucks to Leo and they trot off.

  Ann answers on the first ring. “Hey, Cowboy. You doing alright?”

  My face instantly breaks out into a smile at the sound of her voice. “Hi, Red. I’m doing okay. Had a bit of a scare with one of our horses, but everything is okay now.”

  Ann lightly gasps. “Oh, what happened?”

  I take my time walking Simon back to the barn as I tell Ann the story.

  “Do you have any idea who would do something like this?” She asks with worry and a little anger.

  I drum my thumb on the saddle horn. “Not a clue, I’ll have to check into it tomorrow. I’m just glad Belle and the filly are okay.”

  “I bet, sweet girls, they are,” she says, with a nurturing tone to her voice.

  Belle would be the perfect horse for Ann. They are a lot alike, and I’ll admit, it would be an honor to share Mom’s horse with her.

  “Would you like to come see her, soon?” I ask. I can imagine Ann and Belle sitting in a stall together, Belle’s filly playing next to them.

  “I’d love to, but I want to see you soon, too. How does Wednesday sound? I don’t think I can wait any longer than two days to see you,” Ann says shyly.

  As if she needs to be shy about this anymore. I wish she had no doubt in her mind whatsoever that I want to be around her every second, too. With time, Ann will be whole again.

  “Wednesday sounds great. What do you have in mind?” I grab a brush and begin to clean Simon’s wet fur.

  Ann laughs a few melodic notes into the phone. “That’s for me to know and you to find out.”

  I shake my head, feisty girl. I can sense her feeling pleased with herself through our conversation. “Okay, I’m intrigued,” I answer.

  She snickers on the other end of the line. “You should be. It’ll be fun. Wear something comfortable. We’re staying in.”

  If it’s possible, the smile on my face spreads wider. Like any other guy, I like to go out and have drinks, listen to music and dance, but there’s something to be said about staying home with your girl. I don’t have to share her with anyone; our attention is solely on each other. It sounds perfect for our first official date.

  She’s been mine since I laid eyes on her. Sure, we only made it official a week ago, but that girl has my heart. That sweet, passionate, almost-broken girl captured me. There are still times during the day I can’t believe I landed a woman like her. I’m damn lucky she gave me the time of day.

  “Well, I can’t wait. It sounds like it’ll be a good time,” I say earnestly.

  “Have a good night, Cowboy. I miss you. I’ll see you in a couple days,” Ann says with sincerity.

  I mentally fist pump like a caveman. “I miss you, too. See you soon, Red.”

  Leading Simon to his stall, I toss him a flake of hay and head to the house. As much as I missed being home and sleeping in my bed, the house feels empty. It needs to be filled with more than just Aiden and I, and I know who I wish was here to fill it.

  Monday morning rolls around like the bitch she is. I hate Mondays for obvious reasons. Everyone hates Monday, right? It’s so cliché.

  But, it didn’t start out that way.

  Like every Monday, my alarm greets me earlier than normal so I can be downstairs in time for the shipment of new supplies. Once the delivery guy leaves, I whip up a few batches of cupcakes and cookies. I slice the cake Liv made last night and start the coffee maker. I might hate the taste of coffee, but good Lord, the smell? That shit can work some serious wonders.

  Plugging in my iPod, I blast music through the speakers across the shop. Shaking and shimmying in the kitchen, I have a dance party for one.

  “Hey, woman,” Liv says as she walks down the stairs into the kitchen a few minutes later. “Having a party without me?”

  I wiggle my hips, and gesture for her to join me. Skipping over to where I’m currently dancing, she grabs my hands and we dance ourselves silly. Dipping and turning each other around in circles, we laugh until the timers go off.

  Not even frosting cupcakes could keep us from moving and grooving. Icing bags in hand, we swish our hips to the beat of the music and laugh the early morning away.

  Liv swooshes her hair out of her face and turns to me. “I really missed you, you know?”

  My heart swells. “I missed you, too. It’s good to be home.”

  By the time eight rolls around, a line of people has formed outside. I wave to familiar faces through the glass and unlock the door, letting them in. The end of September brings cooler mornings, and a gust of cold wind hits me in the face causing a shiver to move across my body.

  Chet and Alfred, my regulars, stumble in laughing like they do almost every time I see them.

  They light up when they see me standing behind the counter and, without exchanging words, they shuffle to my side of the counter, trapping to trap me in a hug.

  “Hi, sweetie,” Chet says to my right.

  “We missed you,” Alfred says from my left.

  I awkwardly attempt to hug them back and sniffle a bit.

  Why am I so damn emotional?

  “Oh, boys, I missed you, too. How have you been?”

  They love when I call them boys, they say it makes them feel young, not that I think they need it. They may be in their sixties, but both men still run a mile a day, and regularly do Bikram yoga. Yeah. I don’t even do Bikram. It’s too much for me, but it always reminds me how able-bodied these men are.

  I’ve come to love their presence. They are a shining light of funny and slightly obnoxious.

  They both give me one last squeeze and step away.

  “We’re good. I’m still taking Alfred’s money during our poker games, and he still moans and groans over it, so you didn’t miss much last week.” Chet winks at me knowing he’s taken a stab at his friend.

  Alfred’s eyebrows sink in a disagreeing manner, and sly smile appears. “You bastard!”

  Chet mocks Alfred, looking slightly like a teenager. “I know, I know.” He jokingly waves his arms in the air.

  I pat both of their shoulders and snicker a little. “The usual, then?”

  They both nod, and walk to their table.

  My phone buzzes.

  Duane: Good morning, Red. Waking up without you was hell. I miss you.

  My heart grows inches in size as I read his words. Saying I had a hard time sleeping last night would be a massive understatement. It sucked. I tossed and turned, unable to get comfortable. I had to stack pillows on the opposite side of the bed into a makeshift Duane to feel even a tiny bit relaxed. Pillow Duane didn’t do it for me, needless to say.

  Me: Morning, Cowboy. I miss you, and I missed your snoring ass last night.

  Duane: False ma’am. I do not snore.

  Me: Umm, truth. You do, but it’s cute.

  Duane: Well, at least it’s cute. What are your plans for the day?

  I smile at the easiness of our relationship.

  Me: Just opened the shop. You missed my dance party this morning.

  Duane: Dammit. Think of your man next time, will ya? Record it.

  My man? I love the sound of that. Re-reading his latest text, I pfft behind the counter, and a couple customers sitting close look at me with their eyebrows raised. I straighten my back, and turn to make myself look busy, while still texting.

  Me: Will do. Heading to work?

  Duane: Yep, I’ll be here until about five. Should be a busy day, so if I’m not able to call or text, know that I’m always thinking about you. You’re always on my mind.

  Dear heart,

  Stay in my damn chest! I need you.

  It was just a text, woman, chill the hell out.

  I giggle at my response as I write it, knowing he’ll love it.

  Me: Right back at you, sweet boy. See you soon. Have a good day.

  My phone vibrates with a picture message. I hoot a laugh. Duane sent a picture of his best Scarlet O’Hara face with the caption:

  Duane: Oh my lady, I
love the way you talk to me.

  Me: I know, it’s part of my charm. Now, get to work. I’ll call you tonight. Thinking of you, always.

  I close my phone and head to top off a few customers’ coffee cups. Straightening the wall of books, my phone vibrates.

  Duane: Forever.

  Lord have mercy.

  How can one simple word keep bringing new optimism into my life every time he says it? With a smile plastered on my face, I finish my morning duties as hostess in a haze.

  It’s about closing time when a tall, dare I say, gorgeous blonde and another shorter, just as pretty, redhead walk in. Dressed in an overly tight black pencil skirt and white top, the blonde looks at me in disgust.

  That’s odd.

  The redhead grabs Blondie’s elbow, and whispers harshly into ear. Blondie roughly yanks her elbow away and stalks toward me.

  The menacing look in her eyes makes me take a step forward. My hackles are up. For some reason, I’m prepared for a fight.

  “Can I help you?” I say with a little bit more snark than intended.

  Blondie puffs her small chest out like a damn peacock and sets her hands on my counter, leaving greasy fingerprints. She licks her too-red-lipstick-stained lips and sneers at me.

  “There is a way you can help me.” She tosses a look behind her to the redhead. “Stay away from Duane. As a matter of fact, don’t talk to him again. He is mine. Got it?”

  The desperation in the air is palpable, and I scoff at her. Bitch is seriously out of her mind if she thinks I’m going to believe her over Duane. I peek over her pointy shoulder to raise my eyebrows at the redhead, as if to say, ‘is she for real?’ The redhead rolls her eyes at Blondie.

  Looking back at the face of desperation in front of me, I realize she’s more like a Monet.

  From far away, the painting looks magnificent and beautiful, but as you get closer, you come to find out it’s really quite hideous. The colors are splashed together, making a huge mess.

  I’m not one to judge, really, I’m not. I genuinely think there are no ugly people, just ugly personalities, and this woman’s attitude has made her one of the ugliest people I’ve ever met. She’s bringing out my inner bitch, and I’m only seeing her flaws. Ridiculously thin eyebrows, her nose is too pointy, and her neck? Friggin’ giraffe.