Finding Jordie: Things aren't always what they seem. (The Love Lies Bleeding Series Book 1)

by Harley, HJ

  “Just walk, act as if they aren’t there, all right?” He kissed my forehead and put my sunglasses on my face.

  “No, I thought I’d stop and greet each one of them.” I puckered my lips in a sarcastic pout.

  “Ha ha ha. I never know with you.” He raised an eyebrow and took my hand. We walked through the path airport security had provided for us with Frank no more than five steps ahead of us. Behind us were three airport security guards. Frank stopped short, then was next to me in an instant.

  “Let’s go. Pick up the pace, you two.” He scowled and rushed me forward with his hand on the small of my back. The crinkles in Nathan’s forehead were a dead giveaway for his concern, so I did just what I was told and double-timed it to the SUV waiting at the curb for us. Frank opened the door and assisted me into the vehicle hastily, Nathan right behind me. The driver put our bags in the back and Frank got in the front passenger seat.

  “What was that about?” I slipped the shoulder harness around me and clicked the buckle closed.

  “That’s the norm for Frank, Jordie.” Nathan chuckled. “Too many people. He wanted us out of there is all.”

  “Ooookay, then.” I shook my head.

  When we arrived at Nathan’s apartment the paps were all over once again but the building security had it under control so we breezed inside. His apartment was one of those bachelor pad-type deals. There was barely any furniture except a huge flat screen, tons of electronics beneath it, and a huge couch. No pictures hung on the white walls. The windows were covered by brown blackout curtains like mine and the carpet was thick and brown. In his room, there was a queen-sized bed—unmade of course—a dresser, and another huge flat screen with video game consoles and other electronics underneath that one as well.

  “Like video games much?” I laughed.

  “When you spend as much time as I do inside, you’ve got to do something to keep you sane.” He grinned. “Now that I have you, I’m sure I won’t mind being cooped up as much and won’t be playing any of them.” He grabbed me around my waist and pulled me hard against him.

  “What, do you have that thing on speed dial?” I could feel him against me. I slid my hand down over his jeans to feel him with a mischievous grin.

  “Oh yeah, not going to need those at all any longer.” He flashed me his nut job smile and tugged the back of my hair just enough to send me over that edge again.

  The next six days consisted of a lot of staying in. Nathan had a few meetings to go to so while he did that I shopped. I thought some of the shops in New York were expensive? Los Angeles was twice the price. I was a bargain bottom shopper as it was, so naturally I didn’t get much. I did find a vintage Chanel jacket that I had to have, though. The guy that helped me out said it was a Rachel Zoe favorite. I pretended to know what the hell he was talking about and nodded and smiled. After he tried to coerce me into buying half the store, I high-tailed it out of there with just the jacket.

  Nathan and I went out to dinner twice. I much preferred eating in with him. We watched a lot of television. That was when I was convinced the world had gone bat-shit crazy. What was with all that reality crap anyhow? After three episodes of a show called the Jersey Shore, I remembered why I stopped watching television altogether. I was born and raised in New Jersey. We never behaved like that. Although, I had to admit, I loved that Snooki chick.

  I thought about how drastically my life had changed in three short weeks. If someone would have said to me that my life would be going in the direction it had a month ago, I’d have told them they needed some professional help. It’s funny how things could change in the blink of an eye. I was happy, though. Unbelievably, blissfully, shit-eating, goofy grin plastered to my face twenty-four seven kind of happy. On the last day I helped Nathan pack up some of his stuff to take to New York. He was going to be there for about five months. Talk about the icing on my happy cake.

  “When we get back to New York, what’s your schedule going to be like? I’m not really familiar with a movie star’s schedule.” I laughed. It sounded ridiculous coming out of my mouth.

  “It just depends.” He flipped open his suitcase and started unloading the dresser drawers into it. “Sometimes I’ll be on set twelve to sixteen hours, sometimes just in the day, some just at night. It all depends on what filming is called for and when. This film will be cut into part one and two, so it’s a bit longer filming time-wise.”

  “Oh.” Great, he got to smooch up gorgeous women twice as long. I felt that pang of jealousy run through me again. “So you’ll be in New York, but I’ll never see you.”

  “Of course we’ll see each other. What are you talking about? What’s the matter?”

  “After you’re done, you’re just going to want to go back to your hotel room and crash. I can’t go there at night. I have a kid, remember? My nights aren’t exactly free. And I’ll be at the bar on the weekends. No matter how well the place has been running without me, I feel terrible not being involved. I’ve always worked. I feel... useless, Nathan.” I let out a frustrated sigh and I may have even folded my arms across my chest like a child having a tantrum. Okay, I did do that.

  “How about this, I promise every day after I’m done working I’ll come and spend time with you. I can’t believe you thought I wouldn’t.” His tone hinted he was annoyed and I may have even hurt his feelings.

  “Nathan, honestly, you’re going to work sixteen hours and then come all the way to the East Village so your spoiled-rotten girlfriend doesn’t have a temper tantrum? That’s crazy.”

  “No, what’s crazy is that you think I’ll do that to appease you. What if I told you it’s to appease myself?” He smiled. My smile. All I could do was stand there dopey-grinned myself.

  “If it were up to me you’d just stay with me,” I admitted quietly. “But I don’t think that’s sending the right message to Emma.”

  “What kind of message do you think you’d be sending, Jordan?”

  “Uhhh, move in with a guy after only knowing him for a month?” I said sarcastically. What kind of mother would I be if I invited a man to move in with us, even if it was only for a few months? After only knowing him for a month? Would that send a message that rushing into relationships was the thing to do?

  “Ah, yes, I forgot, you’ve had a revolving door of men in and out of your life over the last eight years.” He rolled his eyes. “I think Emma would be insulted if she knew you thought she perceived us that way, Jordie. She’s a brilliant kid. She knows we aren’t like that. She knows how much I love you.” He stood in front of me with his arms resting on my shoulders. “Besides, Tyler is shacking up with Rachel until he finds his own place.” He blurted this out like it was no big deal.

  “Whaaaat? No way, Rachel is far too picky to let someone live with her, a terminal bachelorette. I don’t believe it.” I felt my mouth hanging open and closed it.

  “Believe it,” he said simply.

  “Well, the apartment downstairs is vacant right now. Maybe... I don’t know, I’ll talk to Emma and see what she thinks about it. I never thought in a million years I’d be having that conversation with my nine-year-old.” I furrowed my eyebrows and crinkled up my nose at just the thought of that conversation.

  “Whatever you want me to do, I’ll do it, Jordie. I’ll stay at a hotel and visit every day, stay downstairs, whatever you decide after you talk to Emma. Just let me know.” He kissed me between my eyebrows and put his arms down. I was a smiling idiot again.

  He let out a small laugh when he picked up the picture frame from his dresser.

  “Who’s that?”

  “It’s a picture of my parents and me. This was taken right before I left for L.A.” He flipped the picture towards me so I could see it. He wore a trace of a smile like he remembered something special.

  “You look like your dad. How long have they been together?”

  “Thirty years.” His smile widened. “They were high school sweethearts, met their junior year. My father had moved to Sacrament
o from Nebraska.” He put the frame in his suitcase between some sweaters. “He told me the moment he heard my mother telling the lunch lady that ‘maybe she should try eating that slop,’ he knew he’d marry her.” He zipped up his suitcase. “He offered her his sandwich, and she said to him that she’d rather take her chances with the slop. They started dating and they were married at eighteen. I popped out two years later.”

  Now there was nothing subtle about his expression. His smile touched his ears and he looked at me. “That’s why I don’t doubt us, and how I feel about you, no matter how fast you, I, or anyone thinks it was. It happened to my parents, so it’s possible.” He shrugged and heaved the large suitcase from the bed to the floor with a thud. “My parents will tell you that they are just as in love as they were thirty years ago, and I believe them. It’s got to be love if my dad could stay with my mom for that long.” He walked the suitcase over to the door. “Love or insanity.” He chuckled. “I’m just kidding. You’ll see she’s great. My dad’s a good guy too.”

  My phone rang and I grabbed it off the dresser. It was never more than five feet away from me while I was there. “It’s Emma,” I told him as I walked out of the room to answer it. “Hey honey, what’s up?”

  “What time will you be home tonight? Aunt Kelly wanted to know if I was staying the weekend or if you wanted me home.”

  “Hello, Mom. How are you, Mom? I miss you, Mom. Nothing, huh?” I teased.

  “Hello, Mom, how are you, Mom, of course I miss you, Mom.” She laughed. “Sorry.”

  “I miss you, Emma. Of course I’d like you home. Is there something that you wanted to do with them this weekend? Is that why you’re asking?” I smiled because I knew my daughter better than anyone, and I could hear it in her voice that there was something she wanted to ask me.

  “Kinda, John’s school is having a carnival thingy.”

  “Emma, if you want to go, I’m fine with that. I would like you home early Sunday then. We can pick you up.”

  “I miss you, Mom. I love you!” she shouted with excitement.

  “I love you too, honey.”

  “Aunt Kelly said she’ll call you later. She’s in the bathroom right now. Bye, Mom. Love you.” She hung up.

  “Picking her up Sunday?” Nathan glanced over at me.

  “Yeah, she wants to go to a fair at my nephew’s school.” I shrugged and tossed my phone on the bed.

  It was just before one o’clock when the doorbell rang.

  “Time to go,” Nathan announced.

  All five suitcases were crammed in the back of the SUV we took to the airport.

  “That’s a lot of stuff for a guy.”

  “You have to figure by the time I’m done filming, it’ll be summer right?”

  “It’ll be September. Shit, that’s almost Christmas.” I shook my head at the way time flew.

  “You know, I probably won’t let you come back to L.A.” I stared out the blacked-out window.

  “I’m pretty sure I won’t want to come back.” He sounded so certain of himself.

  I woke after some time to find Nathan standing in front of me.

  “Sorry, baby, I was trying not to bump you. I need to use the restroom.”

  I pulled my knees up against my chest and put my feet on the seat so he could pass.

  “Thanks.” He leaned over and kissed the top of my head before he stepped out into the aisle. He’d left his laptop on his seat. I picked it up out of curiosity. I had seen plenty of laptops before, everywhere. I just never had any use for one, and this was far better than the relic that was in my office. I opened it up and saw he was in the middle of writing an email so I started to close it, but then I saw my name and curiosity got the best of me.

  Dad, honestly, I’d have married Jordie yesterday if she wouldn’t think I was a completely insane maniac. LOL. I am worried though. Frank is pretty adamant that she has a stalker, a very well-trained stalker at that. But Jordie doesn’t seem to think so. We can talk about it later, hopefully we’ll know more once we’re back in New York. I’ll keep you—

  I heard the toilet flush and I quickly put it back on his seat the way I found it.

  Marry me yesterday? I repeated the words in my head and a small smile touched my lips. As much as I would love to jump out of my own skin with happiness I couldn’t say anything to him—then he’d know I was reading his stuff. What was this about a highly trained stalker?

  He sat back down next to me and took my hand. “How are your ears?” He gave me a light kiss on my left one.

  “If you keep that up I’m taking you back to the bathroom.” I turned my head to kiss him. A little pang of guilt unsettled my stomach. “Ah shit, Nathan.” The jig was up, I was tattling on myself. “I picked up your laptop because I was curious about it. When I opened it I saw my name in the email you were writing, and I read it. I’m sorry.” I blurted it out in one quick sentence, taking a huge inhale when I was finished.

  “We can talk about it later.” He put the laptop back in his bag as the announcement to stow all electronics finished. He looked pissed.

  For the rest of the flight his eyes were everywhere else but on me. He was mad. He had been so private for so long, I should’ve known better. Shit, shit, shit. He hadn’t spoken a word to me in thirty minutes. He just stared out the window while holding my hand. After we landed I couldn’t take the silence any longer.

  “How long are you going to be mad at me?” I asked in a hushed voice. “I don’t know what to do here. I’m sorry, I wasn’t snooping, I picked it up because I was curious about the laptop itself. That’s all. I’ve been thinking about getting one for Emma. When I saw that it was an email, I went to put it back down, but I saw my name. I only read like two lines.” I trailed off because he was just staring out the window unresponsive. Shit, Jordie. You really pissed him off.

  “We can talk about it after we get home.” His voice was quiet.

  As upset as I was, my belly reacted with a familiar dance of happiness to his words. Home. I liked that. A lot. “Nathan—”

  “Jordan, let’s just do this where we are alone, please?” He looked down at me and scowled as he retrieved my bag from the overhead compartment. I was so caught up in my major fuck-up that I hadn’t even noticed that it was time to get off the plane.

  “Hood up, sunglasses on,” he said when we reached the end of the ramp.

  “I’m inside and it isn’t dark,” I snapped.

  “You’ll want your sunglasses, Jordie. The flashes will hurt your eyes and your hood helps block the flash from your peripheral vision. It can get very disorientating.” He proceeded to put my sunglasses on me and tugged my hood up over my head. He took my hand and led me off the ramp. There weren’t as many paps as there’d been in L.A. but there were quite a few and some fans as well. Ignoring everyone, he stayed close behind Frank and literally dragged me behind him. I stumbled a few times because a) I couldn’t see very well, and b) my equilibrium was a little off from flying. My ears still felt clogged. We got into the SUV waiting for us at the curb.

  Still not a word out of Nathan’s mouth, except for his little speech on the ramp. That was it for me. If he was going to be mad at me for snooping when I wasn’t then I was going to be mad at him for withholding information from me. That’s right, buddy. Two can play this game. He should’ve told me what Frank suspected, and as insane as it sounded, I would marry him, too. Yesterday. I let out a small laugh at my thoughts. Maniac. Nut job. Insane. I’d marry him. In a heartbeat. Then Emma would really get the wrong idea about love and marriage and all that. But would she though? I mean, why would she? We were in love, we got married, we stayed together. Just like Nathan’s parents had.

  “Do you want to stop in the bar before we go in? Also, what would you like for dinner? I’ll call and order it,” Nathan said dryly, not bothering to look my way as we pulled up to my place.

  “Um, yes, and I don’t care, order whatever. I’m not hungry.” I opened the truck door and hopped out.r />
  “Wait for Frank, please.” He finally looked at me and grabbed my hand.

  “I’m a big girl, Nathan.” I put my sunglasses on, flipped my hood up, and slammed the door. Flashes were coming from every angle. I gave a small smile, buried my hands in my sweater pockets, and kept my head down as I made my way to the bar. Once I was inside I could see Rachel and Amber were busy behind the bar and Isobel was taking orders on the other side of the room.

  “Rachel! Rachel!” I screamed and waved my arms. The place was packed.

  “Biotch!” she screamed back and waved me over.

  As soon as I made it behind the bar she threw her arms around me and squeezed tight.

  “I missed you, skank ho!” she said playfully. “What’s wrong?” Rachel missed nothing when it came to reading me.

  “Nothing. I’m fine.” I didn’t want to have this conversation screaming over loud music and unwelcome ears. “Tomorrow we’ll talk,” I yelled and she nodded.

  “Hollerrr.” She yanked out two beers from the ice bay and gave me an air kiss.

  I let out a small laugh. Rachel always could make me feel better. “Oh!” I spun around quickly. “I want to know all about your new roommate!”

  Her mouth opened, but then she shut it and nodded with a huge grin on her face.

  I DIDN’T HAVE MY keys on me so I had to buzz in when I got back to my place, Charles right behind me. I heard the beep for the alarm followed by the click for the door and opened it and stomped up the steps slowly. I was tired, annoyed, and hungry by then. I walked into the apartment and Nathan locked the door behind me and turned the alarm back on.

  “Seriously, do we need it on all day and night? It’s such a pain in the ass.” I tossed my sunglasses and smokes on the table. He said nothing. So this was pissy Nathan—he gave the silent treatment. Well, whatever worked for him was fine by me.