Letting Go

by Morningstar Ashley

  Alex lifted his head away, separating their lips from yet another fiery kiss. “Please. Let me taste you,” Alex pleaded. And he would beg to be allowed that pleasure. He couldn’t explain the need, but it was there like a living, breathing thing pushing him to take that one time.

  “Yes, baby. Put your lips on me.”

  Lifting onto his knees, Alex let his eyes venture over every bit of Kelley. He couldn’t remember ever seeing someone so fucking beautiful. From his hairless chest that had a light-colored happy trail that snaked from his navel to his fucking gorgeous cut cock. To the flat of his abs, not a six-pack, but hard as steel.

  He let his tongue lead the way south along that trail as one of his hands went north finding his nipples. He could feel Kelley’s breath coming faster, going shallow as he waited for Alex’s tongue to get to where he wanted it most. But he wanted to tease, to bring him to the brink. To show him even half the want and need that Kelley always had him feeling.

  Bites and licks brought groans out of Kelley. With each one he let out Alex wanted to do it more and more. Wanted to put marks on him, to taste every bit of pale skin, to make Kelley never forget who brought him that amount of pleasure, as he had done to Alex.

  He bypassed Kelley’s hard, leaking cock, breathed in deep as his nose was buried in the trimmed hair that surrounded it. It was the most magnificent scent. Powerful and earthy. He could spend all his time just doing that.

  But he knew what he really wanted to do.

  With just the tip of his tongue, he teased him with little licks at the base of his cock. Then lower around his tight balls. When Kelley’s moans grew louder, and his body was unable to stay still, Alex knew he needed more, knew he had him where he wanted him.

  “Alex,” Kelley said in a raspy deep voice that sent shivers through his body. God, his voice did things to him. It made him want to submit. To let Kelley take control. Have him be the one giving instead of taking pleasure. But not that time, Alex wouldn’t give in to that want, yet.

  Right then, it was about Kelley.

  Giving them both want they truly wanted, he sucked each ball into his mouth, humming around them, one after the other, over and over. He moved up, taking hold of his erection with one hand, then slid his tongue along the slit, dipping the tip of his tongue into the hole, tasting his sweet pre-come, while Kelley groaned and arched up.

  Not being able to wait any longer he took Kelley’s cock into his mouth as far as he could, licking around the shaft with his tongue, letting his saliva pool to create the wetness he needed to glide his cock in and out of his mouth.

  Just as he finally got it to hit the back of his throat, Kelley cried out, “Fuck!” And satisfaction and pride filled his chest. Seeing him on the verge of spilling into his mouth was so fucking hot he almost wanted to let that happen.

  “Alex. I want your dick in my mouth. Now,” Kelley demanded. And Alex obeyed. Who would say no to that command?

  Alex sat up to allow Kelley to adjust the seat, so it lay flat. Once he was on his side, Alex quickly shuffled around so that he was now lying opposite of Kelley on his side, his cock and ass in reach to anything Kelley wanted to do to him.

  Not waiting even, a moment to see what Kelley would do Alex swallowed his thick hot cock to the back of his mouth. Alex lifted one of his hands and palmed the heavy balls, rolling them gently as he sucked. Kelley was letting out more of those growls that Alex loved. His voice going deeper than ever which made Alex whimper in return.

  The noise must’ve gotten Kelley’s attention away from the sensations on his prick because he suddenly swallowed Alex’s cock. It had felt fan-fucking-tastic.

  He loved getting his dick sucked by Kelley. Getting his dick sucked by him while having Kelley’s cock filling his mouth turned him on beyond belief.

  Kelley teased and stroked and sucked bringing him right to the edge before backing off. Over and over he teased him. Alex kept getting lost in the pleasure of Kelley’s mouth. It had him groaning and moaning around his dick. Knowing that vibration of his sounds was ratcheting up his pleasure too only increased his arousal. It’s like they had been feeding each other, making them each hungry for more.

  With his dick still in Kelley’s mouth, he reached a hand around rubbing his hole, Alex lost his mind. He became so lost in the sensation Alex had stopped sucking on Kelley. Oh god, he wasn’t sure how much more he could handle without losing it.

  It had made him want Kelley in him, wanted to be taken over by that feeling. The next thing he knew he was feeling something soft and wet licking the puckered flesh. Alex couldn’t handle it. His tongue was licking him, fucking inside of him.

  Much more of Kelley’s tongue and fingers touching him and he would shoot. His ears were filled with Kelley’s moans as he ate his ass, escalating his own need. He sucked harder on Kelley’s hard dick, swallowing when it would reach the back of his throat.

  They teased each other for what had seemed like hours. Alex’s jaw was sore, but nothing would stop him from doing it, making Kelley lose it and swallowing his come.

  All too soon Alex had felt the tingling in his balls and knew he was going to fucking lose it. His balls were so full they ached.

  He was going to explode.

  Pulling off, his voice rough from the abuse he said, “I’m gonna….” And then he was there, his cock exploding. His come shooting down Kelley’s throat as he swallowed each spurt.

  As soon as his orgasm had started, Alex sucked Kelley’s cock back into his mouth, tightening his lips around his shaft, moaning with every up and down motion. Kelley’s cock swelled getting harder with each swipe of his touch, every pull of suction then he growled, and then Alex’s mouth was full of his come.

  Alex kept him in his mouth licking with his tongue until he was soft before he let his cock fall from between his lips. Breathing heavily, he put his forehead on Kelley’s thigh. God, that was hot. Every time with him got better and better.

  “Come here, baby.”

  Alex had gotten up, turned around and lay cuddled to Kelley. They stayed like that until the fire went out and it was too chilly outside to lie naked. Gathering their clothes, they had moved into the house and up to Kelley’s bedroom.

  Once there, Kelley had suggested washing up in the shower before slipping into bed. But soon all that naked hot flesh within easy grasp had become too much temptation, and they fell into bed wet and horny and didn’t come up until some orgasms were given.

  Sated and sleepy Alex lay cuddled in Kelley’s arms, his back pressed to Kelley’s chest, and not for the first time he thought how perfect it felt. Neither had fallen asleep quite yet, but they were contented in each other’s arms.

  “I’m hungry,” Kelley whispered, and Alex wanted to laugh. Here they lay all cuddled and sleepy and all the guy could think about was his stomach. Alex rolled over to face him.

  “I’d say I am too, but I know you don’t have anything good like chips and queso.”

  Kelley made that scrunched-up-nose face as he rose up onto his elbow. It’s the same face he makes whenever they talked about Alex’s bad eating habits and constant supply of junk food, as he calls it. “No. Maybe I’ll just eat you,” Kelley said then nipped his nose. “You do look like the tastiest treat I’ve ever seen.”

  Alex had laughed then. “Oh my god. That has got to be the corniest line I’ve ever heard,” Alex replied, making Kelley bust out laughing and tumble back on the bed.

  At that moment, his heart was full and bursting with happiness.

  At that moment, he was scared as to what that meant.

  Kelley was heating up some of the food Sofia had made for him in preparation for Peter coming over for dinner. He also decided to make Peter’s favorite food, spicy cilantro shrimp with a honey lime dipping sauce, since it only took one request for him to make time and come over to Kelley’s.

  Color him shocked.

  Just for that occasion, he bought Peter his favorite beer too. Kelley figured maybe if he gave his best
friend treats like you would a dog when you trained it, he could get him to come back next time a bit easier. Not that Peter was a dog.

  As he worked, his thoughts drifted to Alex. Spending nearly every night together with and without Evie had been his norm as of late. He liked it. Coming home alone wasn’t as fulfilling as it once was.

  When he was at Alex’s, they would sit with Evie for dinner. Kelley on the occasion he made it in time, was there for homework time too. In some ways, they both included him in their routine. As much as Alex had been adamant in the beginning he had no time for a full-time boyfriend, he had one, and time was always there.

  Work was the one thing that separated them most times. Kelley worked long hours to get the proposal done along with his day to day stuff. Alex taking on bigger projects than he had ever before. It’d been a while that Kelley sent some business his way, but Alex was still killing it when it came to winning over clients. He had had the privilege to overhear one of those conversations. He jokingly offered him a sales position after that.

  They laughed a lot together. It was one of his most favorite things to do. His goal of filling Alex’s life full of all the things he pushed away before was met day by day. It wasn’t always easy. What relationship was? They fought and argued. But ever since that day Alex had hurt him, true to his word he tried harder and now always took a deep breath before he said something he’d regret again.

  The one subject that was off-limits was Alex and his panic attacks. The man was in full-blown denial and basically would plug his ears chanting la-la-la-la if Kelley even tried to bring it up.

  He placed the food out on the dining room table just as Peter knocked and walked in. “Hey, Kel.”

  “Hey, yourself. You’re fifteen minutes late. Congratulations you’ve improved your time by ten minutes. If this keeps up, you may be on time someday,” Kelley joked.

  “Aren’t you a funny guy today. You had better have slaved over all this food for me and not had made that sweet Sofia do it for you.”

  “She doesn’t slave over the food, dumbass. I pay her, and you know it. Come on, grab some food, and we’ll go eat in the family room just in case we want to watch TV.”

  “Yeah, yeah, stop being so pushy.”

  Kelley sat on one end of the couch as Peter sat on the other. He turned so he could eat and talk to his friend. Peter was one of those guys that aged well even with all the stress life had thrown his way. His dirty blonde hair was still as shiny as ever and although he knew his friend smiled a lot, he didn’t have the telltale sign of aging like laugh lines or those wrinkles between his brows. All things Kelley had.

  Lucky bastard.

  Peter was the only guy he knew that worked longer and harder than he did but still loved his job.

  “What’s going on with you?” Kelley questioned.

  “You know what’s going on with me. The same thing that’s always going on with me. Work.”

  “Oh yeah, you have no life. How could I forget?”

  “What’s going on with you? Last I heard you were chasing some young thing with a kid. How’d that work out?”

  Peter clearly wanted the answer that would allow him to say I told you so. And Kelley was never happier to say he was so fucking wrong. Peter never believed things worked out or that forever with one person even existed. Kelley thought it had been why their college days had been filled with Peter being a player, but as they aged and changed he had started to believe that someone had hurt him.

  He wanted to gloat. Tell his prickly friend how wrong he was, how happy Kelley was, but it just wasn’t worth it.

  “That young thing I was chasing is now my boyfriend,” Kelley replied with a proud grin.

  “No shit. I did not see that coming.”

  “Yeah, we started out friends then moved to dating, but it came clear to both us that we had fallen into something more than just going out on dates so…boyfriends.”

  “Huh. Boyfriends. Well good for you. And you get a ready-made family with him having a kid and all.” Peter was still a pissy prick, but Kelley could handle that.

  “Peter, you’re sounding like an asshole again,” Kelley said. “It’s not a ready-made family because she isn’t his kid. Evie is his little sister and that kid is going to be smarter than all of us combined someday and probably rule the world.” And damn if Kelley didn’t believe that.

  “Fine. I won’t say anything more about your relationship. But I still reserve the right to say I told you so later.”

  They were quiet for a few minutes. Kelley could tell there was more Peter wanted to know. Probably either afraid to ask or he wasn’t sure how to ask. Kelley had no problem waiting him out.

  “I’m happy for you, Kel. You deserve to have all the things you want,” Peter said quietly with sincerity in his eyes. “And don’t tell anyone I said that. I have a reputation to keep for fuck’s sake. But you’ve put up with my cranky ass for decades and for that alone you should be getting your world fucking rocked regularly at the very least. And with that glow you’re sporting it seems like you are.”

  Kelley laughed. It wasn’t often he saw that softer, real side of Peter. It made it even more meaningful that it had happened now. But he never stuck around for long.

  “Thanks, Peter. Your secret is safe with me.”

  “Tell me about him. This boyfriend of yours.”

  “His name is Alex. Like I said he has his little sister, who truly is exceptionally smart and thoughtful, but she’s also a wiseass and bit of a drama queen. If you remember, I said he used to work at Vivid, now he works as a graphic designer in his own company. It’s only him but he keeps busy and earns a healthy living. But, man, he is prickly. Even more so than you sometimes. It’s a lot of work to be a guardian of a child, add in the fact that she has mental health issues that stem from the car accident that killed their mother and life for him is nothing less than stressful.”

  “I have no doubts. Mental health issues are hard on anyone that have them, but no one wants to see a child going through that. He sounds like he’s got his head on straight.”

  “He does. Mostly.” Kelley sighed. He hated to bring it up. Give something to Peter that he would hold against his guy, but he needed someone else’s opinion on how to approach that with Alex. Kelley was out of ideas.

  “What do you mean mostly?”

  “He’s having panic attacks but refuses to acknowledge that’s what they are. He calls them episodes brought on by stress. I’ve tried to talk to him about going to see someone, but it always ends up with us fighting or him just shutting down the conversation.”

  He held up his hand to stay any response Peter was about to give. “Please, Peter. Take this seriously. Don’t tell me to run or ditch him for some random fuck. It isn’t going to happen. Be my friend, or we can just talk about something else.”

  “You’re right,” Peter said. “This isn’t a one-size-fits-all situation. You know from college when we would see guys go through shit and not one was helped the same way.”

  “Yeah, I know. But I hate sitting by and not helping. It’s just not in me to do. I need to be doing something.”

  “And you are, aren’t you? You’re there. Willing to talk to him. You show that every time you open that big heart of yours and tell him it’s there for him anytime he needs.”

  Kelley hadn’t thought of it that way. Not actively doing something made him feel like he wasn’t doing anything. He wanted to help Alex. Needed to see him get better. “That’s it, huh? Just be there? You know sitting back is not my strong suit.”

  “Yup, which is why I call you a mother hen. You’re like that helicopter mom everyone hates. Hovering and buzzing about waiting to nag and feed us all chicken soup.”

  “Oh, shut up, you ass. You know you love my chicken soup.” Kelley laughed feeling lighter just from talking that shit out with someone.

  “You mean Sofia’s chicken soup?” Peter said with a chuckle.

  “Thanks, man. This helped.”

/>   “You know what I think?”

  “Since you only think about work that should be easy to figure out,” Kelley said jokingly.

  “Hardy har, funny man. I think it’s time the whole gang meets this guy. It seems things have progressed to a level of serious that your best friends should have the right to embarrass you in front of him.”

  “I know. I’ve been putting it off since when I had met his best friend, Ben. Let’s just say it did not go well.”

  “What, did the guy not like you? I mean I didn’t think that was possible. Everyone likes you.”

  “Oh no, Ben seemed not to care who I was from Adam as long as he could scream to the whole room how right he was about how Alex needed to date and he should’ve listened sooner.”

  “Seriously?” Peter’s eyes had blown wide from shock.

  “Oh, yeah, as the night wore on he became even more of a prick. I won’t bore you with the details. But from what Alex told me yesterday the guy’s girlfriend is still mad as hell at him, and this happened a week ago.”

  “Well, shit. Good on her for sticking to her guns because that guy sounds like a jackass,” Peter said as he shook his head. Peter might be a cranky ass, but he still was a good guy.

  Peter left an hour later, leftovers in hand. They didn’t talk much about Peter’s life outside of work. They never usually did. He had hope that one day he would open up. But it had still been fun. They laughed and drank beer and ate food. What more could anyone ask for from a night with a good friend?

  A few minutes after Peter had left Kelley found himself calling his guy. Needing to hear his voice more than anything tonight.

  “Kelley? It’s eleven o’clock. Why are you still awake?” Alex’s sleepy voice came through the line.

  “I’m sorry, baby. I didn’t realize it was so late. Peter just left.”

  “Oh, wow. He came then?”

  “I was surprised too. I won’t keep you. I just wanted to hear your voice and to ask if you wanted to meet my friends.” Kelley knew he sounded unsure, but he was telling the truth about his fear over Alex’s reaction to being asked because of the whole Ben thing.