Sin's Flower

by Carlene Love Flores

  “You know what? You acting like a jerk, it’s annoying. But it doesn’t hurt.” She looked straight through him; tears showed up like a magic trick and filled the corners of her eyes. “Lying to me, saying you want me to leave when I know you don’t, that hurts.”

  “Why?” he asked her, frowning.

  “Because that means you don’t respect me enough to be honest. And that means we can’t be friends.”

  He didn’t know if it was what she’d said or the way her constant look bore down into his aching heart.

  “You’re right. That’s exactly what that means.”

  And that was not what he’d come here to do. Hurt and lie.

  “Come here, Lily.”

  Too scared now to trust him, she didn’t budge from the corner. She didn’t even blink.

  “Please,” he said.

  She extended her arm, covered in long sleeve flannel, the wrist he’d undoubtedly hurt earlier poking from the opening. It would be the first thing he kissed. Trying to be tender, trying to be the good man he’d set out to become on this trip, he beat back the insane, intense desire to squeeze her until he felt her pulse beneath his grip. He laced his fingers with hers as she offered them to him.

  “I can’t stop thinking about your lips,” he whispered.

  She didn’t say anything. As he came closer to her face, she closed her eyes.

  “No, Lily. Don’t close your eyes.”

  Two shots of blue, stronger than any tequila he’d ever chased, opened back up, blue fire. His lips were dry but he wouldn’t lick them. She would do that for him. God, he felt himself becoming that guy again. That man who didn’t know how in the world he was ever going to change. That man, who wanted to have this beautiful flower riding all the way back to California, where he would keep her and never let her go.

  Chapter Sixteen

  “Okay.” She blinked, once for balance, once for a reality check and once more for time. Even a few short seconds would help her adjust to what was happening here. Her breath came out in a cool fog, unbelieving that she was about to make out with Jaxon. So she stood there, eyes wide open, waiting for him to make the next move because she had no idea, apparently, how one leaned in for a romantic kiss with their eyes glued to the other person. “I’m sorry, I don’t know how to do this…like this.”

  “Shh, I’ve almost found it,” he scolded her lightly.

  “Found it? Found what?”

  “This.”

  Oh my God. It was wrong to take the Lord’s name in vain so often, but she was about to die, she just knew it.

  “Keep your eyes open,” he said just as she’d begun to slip away into bliss.

  “Okay,” she said with no more than a wisp of the chilly air her breath made.

  Her senses were aware of nothing and everything, like never before. Yes, it was cold but she felt each of his ten fingertips pressing against her scalp, holding her head in place, heating her all the way to her toes.

  She wasn’t going anywhere, ever.

  How long would it be until he did that thing in that place again? She extended her jaw and neck, watching him looking at the spot just behind her ear, the inch of skin between it and her hairline. She’d already memorized how the tip of his nose felt, nudging around the area and then the ridge of his upper lip teasing behind it. Then the way his bottom lip chased all those flowery sensations away. And replaced them with hot, warm, sucking pressure.

  Oh my God, again. She didn’t know how much longer she could watch the driveway, the cloudy gray sky, Grace’s dress form in the granny flat’s window that was creeping Lily out right now.

  This was crazy.

  But as she lowered her chin to accommodate his nuzzling and sucking, what she saw made her never want to close her eyes. It was a beautiful view of his neck and the permanently inked rose thorns, what she’d thought before were tiny sharks’ teeth, forever pricking their way up his slightly weathered, tanned skin. The trail of the thorns looked painful, like tracks, while the one his suckling tongue had just blessed her with felt so good.

  “Jaxon.”

  “Hmm?”

  “Can I close my eyes, please? As beautiful as your neck is, I feel weird with my eyes open.”

  “I’d rather you didn’t.”

  “Why?” she asked.

  His lips left the lucky spot behind her ear. That wasn’t a look of pleasure on his face.

  “You said without trust, we could never be friends.”

  She nodded at his words as he finally touched her again. His fingers glided as far as they could into her hair, pulled back, tangled and messy. “As hard as it is for you to believe this, I do trust you, Jaxon.”

  His head sunk, causing the tuft of dirty blond bang, half spikes and half pompadour, to fall and break from its perfect form. He let it dip for a few more seconds and then up came a more sincere, less arrogant looking man.

  “Lily.” She watched as he bit at his lower lip while saying her name. “Did you enjoy what we were doing just now?” He smiled soft and soberly, his voice deep and naughty, his warm breath a godsend.

  She blushed. “Yes.”

  “Then this is your next lesson. Please, just do as I ask.”

  What was there to think about really? He hadn’t even kissed her lips yet and she wanted desperately to find out how that would feel, whether she had turned into a Popsicle or not. She didn’t understand what his thing was about this open eyes policy but he’d asked nicely. For him.

  “Okay,” she gave in.

  “Thank you.”

  “You’re welcome, Jaxon.”

  “Shh,” he said, and then stopped himself just as their lips would have touched for the first time.

  Surely she looked like a crazy person this close up. Damn it if her eyes weren’t about to cross in such close proximity while staring into his. She had to blink. Refocus. When she did, it was like she was staring at a lost soul. But he was brave and tough too. Like he’d fight you if that’s what you really wanted, only to admit later that all he really wanted was to go home and sleep it off.

  Jaxon’s lips were beautiful this close up. She imagined the soft creases in his full pink flesh holding tiny little bursts of his taste.

  “What are you waiting for? Kiss me.” She couldn’t believe she’d just made that request. As soon as the words left her mouth, she wanted to slink back into the corner because she knew he was about to say no.

  * * * *

  There was no saying no to his Lily. He wasn’t letting her get away from him now. Not after that brave little invitation she’d just broken him with. Dammit that he couldn’t take her inside.

  She inched away but he cupped his hand to the back of her head and gently pulled her face back to his. “Lily, this is going to get me into so much trouble.” The worry flashing in her eyes was impossible to miss. He’d sensed her lack of confidence about her body from the very start. The girl lived in too many layers and too many of them made of thick, sweats material. It was a shame. Maybe he could help her learn to own her sexiness. Maybe some more lessons wouldn’t hurt but rather help. As much as he wanted to find his way inside her lush body right now, he knew the most she was expecting was a kiss. He’d enjoy that for now but that would be it. Then they would talk. And maybe, if he was lucky, he’d get her to come out of her shell. But first, that request she’d made of him. His way.

  “Lily, remember, eyes open please.”

  “Right. Sorry, I forgot.”

  He picked up her right hand, took a second to suck at the tip of the fingers resting on his lips and then placed them at the back of his neck. “It’s okay.” And then he slowly did the same with her other hand and slightly trembling fingers. “Don’t be nervous.”

  “Okay,” she said, swallowing.

  He scanned the area to be sure the Masons hadn’t arrived yet and then reached behind his head to hold her waiting hands, pressing her fingers deeper into the flesh of his neck. He could feel how hot his skin had become. Good. Giving he
r a little something to do would take her mind off being out here alone with him and clue him into whether or not she’d be able to handle his perversions, should they make it further than just a kiss.

  Once he felt her take over the massaging motion of his neck, he left her hands alone to do their magic and for a second, simply enjoyed the touch. But only for a couple seconds because with each of her feminine squeezes of his tense muscles, his dick got harder. He could have controlled it but wanted her to realize and believe in the effect she had on him, or any man for that matter.

  With her huddled safely against the sturdy wooden, corner walls, he held tightly to her hips and pushed forward until his chest touched hers. Her arms reached to meet his height and her fingers pressed more deeply to the back of his head, making their way up into his hair.

  Fuck. He couldn’t just kiss her.

  Not with her eyes holding him accountable. Not with her protected by God knew how many layers of clothes. Not even the fear he’d counted on of pissing off Trissy for life would be able to stop him from getting himself inside her should they kiss right now. But he knew that if he did nothing, it would knock her budding confidence. So he went again to her neck, just below her ear lobe and suckled her there until he’d mentally regained enough control.

  After a nice long session of memorizing the taste of her neck, he whispered into her ear, “You’re so sexy, Lily. I want you too badly.” He hoped it had been enough for her. Because it had nearly killed him to have to pull away.

  * * * *

  Holy cow. That was amazing. She could die right now and go to heaven, that was if they’d let a flaming hot woman with the sweats and the shakes inside the pearly gates. When she got her voice back, she would thank Jaxon for his special kiss. At least her vision seemed to be working. She focused on Jaxon who had stepped back and now stood there so captivating and sexy, a couple feet from her. “Thank you,” she said to him.

  His eyebrows shot up and then he wiped a thumb over his bottom lip. “You liked?”

  She nodded. “I did.”

  His face quirked for a minute like he was surprised and then it turned down into a sexy frown.

  “What’s wrong?” she asked him, afraid he would say they were done and she should leave.

  “I just realized how hard it’s going to be to sleep under the same roof as you tonight and be a good boy.”

  She loved it when he was silly. But whoa, first off, staying the night with Jaxon was more than fine with her. They were adults and who would care if she invited him to her room? It shouldn’t be a big deal to anyone but Lily. So secondly, what the heck was up with his pouting about it? But before she could respond, he shifted his body and reached out for her hand.

  “No more kissing for the night. It’s for your own good, trust me. And you might want to lock your bedroom door,” he said under a sexy but serious raised brow. “Seriously, Lily.”

  “Okay.” If it had been anyone else, she might have felt a hit to her ego but there was just no mistaking the way Jaxon made her feel. She didn’t think he could lie about the sexy things he’d said to her and if she wasn’t mistaken, neither could his body. “You haven’t found the secret stash inside yet, have you?” She would try and make his night on the couch as comfy as possible. Before she ran out of this unexpected gulp of confidence, she smiled and brought his hand to her lips for a kiss. “I’m going inside now. I hope you’re coming too.”

  * * * *

  He was in so much trouble for this. You will not fuck her tonight. And kill the visual lock on her ass. Shit. You could make this easier on yourself. Look away, dickhead. But Lily’s sweatpants covered flared hips and perfectly squeezable cheeks provoked his natural naughty curiosity. She wouldn’t lock her door. He would come to her. They would lie together. But that was it. He was a forty-four year old grown man. He could snuggle without sex.

  “Lily, you said you were going in. But…you’re still here.” He grinned, coughed and nodded in order to keep from laughing. “Get inside. I’ll be there in a bit,” he said to her, holding out his hand but letting it fall back to his side.

  Good thing too. Trissy was up against doctor’s orders again, poking her head out the door over the front porch as Lily slid past her into the house. That look on her face tunneling right for him might be priceless but Jaxon knew he’d pay dearly, very soon.

  “Well, the food nearly burned. And, your father is on his way.”

  Trissy’s knowing eyes couldn’t have been clearer. He’d just been warned.

  Chapter Seventeen

  Lily’s food smelled delicious and tasted even better. Jaxon pulled his teeth over his fork, enjoying the last bite of spicy smothered pork chops. A drizzle of buttery garlic sauce trickled down the fork to his finger. He wiped it with his napkin rather than risk being shot over a quick lick with the tongue. If it had been a meal for two, he’d have done it just to tease Lily. But there was an audience present and one he didn’t want to incite.

  “That was so good. Thank you,” he offered as everyone leaned back into their chairs looking like a round table of fat, sated house cats. Jaxon’s thumbs rapped up against the underside of the table.

  Lucky, of all people, echoed him when Trissy remained oddly silent. “Lily is a great cook.” His cousin then rubbed at his belly but gave Luke a look. “Dad, if you keep coming over here and mooching supper, your shop pants are gonna need bigger suspenders.”

  Luke chuckled. Jaxon admired the easy relationship between his cousin and uncle and then couldn’t help but glance toward his own father. Bear Mason sat with Maryellie on his lap, lost in grandpa heaven.

  Jaxon turned his attention back to Trissy who was frowning. “Yes, Lily is a great cook,” she said in her husband’s direction. But then she turned to Lily. “I don’t know what I’d do without you, little sis. You’ve kept the family fed while I’ve been useless. I don’t think I realized how much I needed you until this week.”

  Yeah, Jaxon heard it loud and clear. Translation, Don’t you be getting any ideas of stealing my baby sis. Problem was, he feared he’d already surpassed that.

  “Daddy, did you know who made the green beans?” Maryellie asked.

  Jaxon turned back to his daughter and father. “What? There were green beans? Did you sneak some of those yucky things on my plate?”

  “Daddy! I made them.”

  Everyone at the table chuckled.

  “Oh wow, I really hope I didn’t eat any gross green beans,” he said it with a huge grin and a tickle to her belly.

  “Oh, I’m sure you did. I made sure to serve plenty on your plate.” Lily’s voice kissed his ears and she just smiled in his and Maryellie’s direction. He was so grateful for her participation in silly talk to cover up his nerves.

  He turned from listening to Lily back to his daughter. “Well I must not have realized what they were because they were so delicious. What a wonderful chef you are, sweetums.”

  Now that Jaxon was smiling, his father must have felt at ease enough to ask him a direct question.

  “So Jaxon, any chance you and Maryella might stick around past the holidays?”

  “Um, you know, Bear, I hadn’t really thought that far out.” Jaxon didn’t know what else to say.

  But apparently Trissy did. “Well, it’s time for me to get back to my back, ugh.”

  Lucky stood to help her but she rested her hand over his arm. “Actually, I was hoping Jaxon could help me this time. We haven’t really had a chance to catch up yet.”

  “Sure, no problem,” said Lucky and then kissed her forehead.

  “Jaxon?” Trissy asked, “Walk me back to my room?”

  Was anyone going to protest? Nope.

  Why did that not look like a girl who was over the moon that her best friend was back?

  Jaxon excused himself from dinner and followed along, hoping he was reading her all wrong.

  Once they were in her room and he had helped her lean back onto the bed, he blurted something out just to kill
the silence. “So hey, what’s up with all the cheating on doctor’s orders to stay in bed? Hmm?”

  She was holding it in. She didn’t want to have this talk any more than he did. Oh shit, what if this had nothing to do with the eyes he’d had for Lily in front of Trissy but was everything about that night in the field?

  “Jaxon, I know how hard it was for you to make this trip, and it means so much to me that you did.”

  He let out a giant pent up breath.

  “I’m glad you feel that way—”

  “I wasn’t finished, hun. It took all of two seconds for me to see the way you look at my sister. As grateful as I am that you came, we are not going there, Jaxon. I mean it. I’d love to have you stay through the New Year, as long as you promise not to get involved with Lily.”

  What could he do? At ten years his junior, Trissy hadn’t changed and still didn’t mince her words when it came to pointing out the obvious to him.

  “I hear you and you’re right.”

  “Good,” she said, eyeballing him still.

  “What? Am I supposed to ignore her completely?” he asked, hiding the hurt Trissy had caused him.

  “No, that would be strange and rude. Maryella loves Lily already. Just keep your hands to yourself. Jaxon, please.”

  “Like I said, you’re right.”

  He leaned over and kissed her forehead then pulled a blanket up and over her lower half.

  “I’m just looking out for her best interest,” Trissy said as he went to pass through her door.

  “I know.”

  He didn’t bother adding that he too, genuinely felt protective of Lily and wanted only to do good things for her. Trissy wouldn’t hear that crap. But he cared, beyond belief; he cared about Lily.

  The question was, was it inevitable she’d get hurt because of it? As a friend, Lily could end up collateral damage just like Trissy had been in that field. Worse, as a lover, Lily might become twisted into the epitome of jealousy and rage, like Vangie.