Shadow of Love: Love Changes Everything! Book 5 (The Shadow Series)

by Barbara Goss

  It was perfect; Anna loved the house.

  “Reverend Croft,” Julia said, “where would you like to put the table Caleb made for you?”

  Billy smiled, and Anna knew Julia was the first to call him Reverend, and he was thrilled to hear it.

  “Ask my wife.” He said smiling at Anna. “She’s in charge of the house.” Anna loved the way Billy had said ‘ask my wife’. It made her feel like she truly belonged and that he respected her position as his spouse. She looked at the table. She knew nothing about decorating. She ran her hand over the shiny top. “This is lovely.”

  As if Julia knew Anna needed advice she said, “I put mine in front of my sitting room window.”

  “Yes, that’s a good idea,” Anna said.

  After everyone had gone, Anna began to feel uncomfortable. For the first time, she was totally alone with Billy. What should she do or say? Fortunately, Billy came to her rescue.

  “Anna, I want you to relax for the rest of the day. I can help you with the boxes tomorrow. Today, my first concern is setting up my office so I can prepare my first sermon. I plan to be the best minister I can be. I want to write a sermon that will move hearts, bring tears to eyes, and make people want to honor and serve God; it's my life’s mission. The sooner I can begin, the happier we’ll both be,” he said, and then chuckled. “It will make both of our lives easier.”

  “I’m not sure what to do first.” Anna sat atop a crate of dishes.

  “Don’t worry about anything. I plan to take you to Pete’s for dinner because I have a friend that works there that I’d like to speak with,” he said. “You might want to sit in a chair, take a nap, or read a book.”

  “Read a book?” she asked.

  “Yes, I have a whole box of them in this mess somewhere. Would you like me to find you one?” he asked.

  “I…I can’t read,” she said, embarrassed.

  “You can’t read?” he asked, visibly stunned.

  Why did he have to say it like she was the only person in the world who couldn’t read? Her mother hadn’t been able to read either. Few in the neighborhood where she grew up could read.

  She watched Billy’s face go from happy to worried when the subject came up. He paced the floor.

  “Anna, we’ll have to fix that. Immediately. A minister’s wife must be literate.”

  “Liter—what?”

  “Able to read and write. It never crossed my mind…”

  He paced while rubbing his forehead. For the first time, Anna felt that she might be more of a hindrance to Billy than help.

  “I’m sorry. Maybe you should have asked about my past before marrying me,” Anna said, with pout.

  “Maybe you’re right,” he said, not unkindly. “Come. I’ll make the time to hear it now. Heaven knows I don’t need anymore surprises.”

  Anna decided to tell her story frankly, and honestly. They pushed some boxes off the sofa to make room for them to sit down.

  “As I told you, mother was a…a prostitute. We lived on the third floor of a warehouse, built along the wharfs in New Orleans. The locals called my mother and her kind ‘window wavers,’ because they stood in the windows in seductive clothing and waved at the sailors as they filed off the ships.

  “Men came and went, day and night, but it kept us in food and clothing, and paid our rent as well. For years I accepted this way of life as normal. ‘Window wavers’ sounded a whole lot better than the coarser name for what she really was.”

  Anna looked down in embarrassment. “I heard and saw a lot growing up. I’d made up my mind early in life that I’d never follow in my mother’s footsteps. She did what she needed to survive, and I loved her for it, but she wasn’t a happy woman, and she seldom smiled.

  “When she got sick, the doctor said she’d contacted syphilis, and soon she was unable to walk and became bedridden. I had to watch her suffer in pain before she finally died. That was when I swore I’d never ever let a man touch me in that way.” She looked up at Billy. “And that’s why I accepted your offer. For me it was the perfect arrangement.”

  “How is it that you never went to school?” he asked.

  She shrugged. “My mother just didn’t think it was important and never sent me. I was ignorant as to how important an education would be, later in life. As a kid, I was glad she didn’t make me go.”

  “Do you have any family at all?” he asked.

  “I have an aunt who moved to Abilene from New Orleans about four years ago. I came here in the hope of finding her, but she's not here anymore, and I have no idea where she might have gone. So I guess I have no one.”

  He patted her hand. “God is all-knowing. This was all meant to be.” He stood. “I’ll contact my brother’s wife, Violet. She’s a teacher, and misses the work terribly since she gave it up for her husband. We’ll solve this, don’t worry, Anna. God puts people in our paths for a reason. You’ll see.”

  Anna didn’t rest when Billy left her to arrange his office. She scrubbed the cupboards and began putting dishes away, hoping to please him; since she knew how disappointed he was that she couldn’t read. After a while, her back ached from stretching to reach the higher shelves. She took a break, went upstairs to the bedroom assigned to her, dug out linen, and made up her bed. When she was done, she went into Billy’s room and made up his bed, then she went back to her room and reclined on her bed to rest for a while.

  The next thing she knew Billy was shaking her awake.

  “Time for dinner, Anna. Anna! ” he said, gently shaking her shoulder.

  Anna rubbed her eyes and quickly sat up; embarrassed she’d been caught lying down in front of Billy.

  “Give me a moment to straighten myself,” she said in a sleepy voice.

  “Certainly. I’ll be in the sitting room.”

  Julia kissed Alfie on the cheek. “Goodnight, see you in the morning. Don’t forget you’re going with Caleb to Jonas’s in the morning to buy a full-grown horse. No more pony for you.”

  “I’m so excited,” Alfie said. “I hope I can sleep. I want a black horse.”

  After he’d scampered up the stairs, Julia joined Caleb in the sitting room. “He’s precious. It makes me happy to make him happy.”

  “I doubt Jonas will charge me for the horse, but I’ll offer,” he said, patting the place beside him. “Come sit with me, sweetheart.”

  Julia sat and cuddled up to him. “I love you, Caleb. I love my life, and I’m very happy.”

  “I’m glad. I have to admit, I also enjoy having Alfie as a son. It’s nice having my own private shadow.” He laughed and pulled his wife closer. He whispered in her ear, “I love my life, too, thanks to you.”

  She smiled and kissed his cheek. “Thank you for helping Billy, too.” Caleb waved her comment away, as if to say it was no trouble. She asked, “What do you think of Billy and Anna?”

  “I wasn’t too sure at first, but after talking with both of them, I think it’s the perfect solution,” he said.

  “You want to know what I think?” she asked.

  “What?”

  “I bet you ten passionate kisses they'll end up falling in love.”

  “You’re on. I don’t see that happening, but instead of shaking hands on this bet, I think I should have a taste of the prize, so I know what I’m getting when it turns out I’m right.”

  Julia leaned over and kissed him passionately. Caleb instinctively pulled her closer until she wound up in his lap. When they finally came up for air, Caleb said, “I have to win this bet!”

  “For now, why don’t we finish this discussion upstairs?” Julia said.

  Chapter 5

  As soon as Anna and Billy were seated at Pete’s, Billy motioned for Dora to come over.

  “Hey! Bil—oops! I mean, Reverend Croft,” Dora said. “How nice to see you both, and congratulations on you marriage.”

  Both Billy and Anna thanked her.

  “Dora, do you like your job here?” Billy asked.

  “I hate it, but I ha
ve to pay the rent,” she said. “What will you both have tonight?”

  “How would you like to work for us?” he asked.

  Dora looked stunned, and then her mouth turned up to form the biggest smile. “God bless you, Reverend. I’d love to!”

  “I owe you one, and you know the house, and the situation, besides.” Billy said.

  “Can I give Pete my notice today? Can I start tomorrow?” Dora asked.

  “Yes. We’ll need help unpacking, and just between us, I know you can be trusted. My sister told me you were discreet, and Anna will be busy learning to read. I’m going to ask Violet if she’ll teach her. This goes no further, though.”

  “Oh, I can be very discreet.” She winked at them both. “The special tonight is pig knuckles and pea soup.”

  “Um, I’ll pass on that. How about you Anna?”

  “I’m not very hungry. I’ll just have the soup,” she said.

  “I’ll take the pot roast. Give Anna the same, will you Dora? Soup is not enough, Anna.”

  She smiled at Billy. “I’m not used to spending money. How are we fixed for cash? Can we afford a housekeeper and two pot roast dinners?”

  Billy laughed. “We’re far from rich, but I have some money saved, and my pay is very generous. Besides, Caleb and Julia gave us a very large amount for a wedding gift, as did Jonas.”

  “I’m bound to forget and try to save money from time to time, so you might have to remind me. I’ve always done my own cleaning,” she said.

  “Well, I want you to concentrate on the reading, and as we previously discussed, there will be duties for you as the minister’s wife. Not too much at first, but we’ll slowly work you up to teaching a Sunday school class.”

  “Oh, I couldn’t!” she said. “I ain’t the least bit qualified.” Billy frowned and Anna corrected her sentence. “ Sorry. I’m not the least bit qualified.”

  They were walking to their buggy after they’d eaten, when a drunken man bumped into Anna. She turned around and said, “Hey, watch where you’re going, you big oaf!” The drunk turned and gave her a lopsided smile, then grunted and kept walking.

  She stood with her hands on her hips, and her mouth open as if in preparation to say something more to the man, but Billy put his hand on her lips and quietly pulled her toward the buggy.

  When he had her seated beside him, he looked at her. She looked angry—her face was red and her lips were set in a thin straight line.

  “Calm down, Anna,” Billy said calmly. “You can’t do that. You’re a lady now.”

  “But the dumb lout—”

  “Anna!” Billy said a bit more firmly. “You are the minister’s wife." He paused. "Just…calm down, and we’ll talk about it when we get home.”

  On the way home, Billy couldn't help but wonder if this had been such a good idea, after all. Now that he had the job, would he be able to keep it if someone saw his wife in a brawl with a drunk on the street?

  Was it even possible to take a girl off the streets and make a lady out of her? Only in fairy tales, he thought, and sighed.

  When they were home, Anna made a beeline for her room, but Billy grabbed her arm gently and pulled her back. “Oh, no you don’t. We’re going to have a chat.”

  Anna frowned, but she sat down on the sofa. Billy sat beside her. “You must always be aware of your manners while in public, Anna. If someone were to see you brawling in the street with a drunk I could lose my minister's job, and our paycheck, and the house—“

  “I suppose you think this is all easy for me?” she snapped.

  “Well, no. I do realize it’s a big change from the life you led before, but surely you see that it’s an improvement, Anna. You’ve been given a push up the ladder of success. God made it possible for you to be a better and smarter person. Are you going to let God down?” Billy looked at her with raised eyebrows.

  She shook her head.

  “Anna, I realize this isn’t easy for you, and I think you’re doing a magnificent job so far. I was so proud of you at the church after I was hired. You were the perfect lady. I realize you may slip from time to time, but you have to try harder to keep it together when in public…for me, please.”

  She nodded. “I’m sorry, but that man was rude to just bump into me like that and not apologize.”

  “You are so right, Anna. He was rude, but your calling him names and starting a fight with him won’t change him one bit. Whenever I’m tempted to do something I know isn’t right, I stop and pray, and God helps me to switch my thinking. It works every time.”

  “It does?” she asked, looking up at him with the prettiest brown eyes.

  “As a matter of fact, believe it or not, I was once the biggest troublemaker in Hays, Kansas.”

  “You weren’t!” she exclaimed.

  “I gambled with the likes of some dangerous men, lost thousands of dollars, and my sister had to bail me out, which almost caused her to lose Caleb. It’s a long story, but she’ll be the first to tell you: I was a hooligan.”

  “How could you have changed so much?” she asked.

  “Well, when I saw how I’d almost ruined the lives of three people with my behavior, it taught me somewhat of a lesson. Shortly thereafter Miles started taking me to church. I became a Christian, I gave my heart and life to God, and I learned to pray whenever I’m tempted to misbehave. I learned so much in college about controlling my behavior and thinking,” he said.

  “So every time I’m tempted to do something I know is wrong, I should pray? What should I pray for?” she asked.

  “Ask for God’s help. He doesn’t always give us the material things we ask for, but he almost always helps us with things like this. He is our Father, remember?”

  Anna smiled. “I promise to do better, Billy. I feel terrible that I almost messed things up for you when you’ve been nothing but wonderful to me. I’m living a dream here, and I don’t want to lose this life, either.” She kissed his cheek swiftly, as she’d done to Julia to thank her for all of her help. “Thank you for everything,” she said, and she walked up the stairs to her room.

  As she walked away, Billy prayed for God to keep his thinking about Anna pure. Just the simple kiss on the cheek had been enough to put his mind where it shouldn’t be. He stood and went to his office to work on his sermon.

  Anna gave her best, ladylike greeting when she met Violet. “It’s a pleasure to meet you.”

  “Hello, Anna,” the pretty, strawberry blonde said. Anna invited her into the kitchen.

  “Welcome to our family. You also have a little nephew named Andrew Miles Croft, and a new brother, Miles,” she said. “He dropped me off, but you’ll meet him when he picks me up.”

  Anna smiled. “Thank you.” She liked Violet immediately. Violet didn’t look at her in a judgmental way, or look down at her, and she felt comfortable with her.

  Violet agreed to tutor Anna in reading, every day, while her son was napping. Miles would bring her, run errands, and then pick her up an hour or so later. Violet usually arrived after Miles was finished work, in the late afternoon. Anna learned that Miles was a bank manager, and that he seemed overly protective of Violet.

  “Let’s get started. I can only stay an hour or so each day, but I think you’ll pick reading up quickly. Julia said you were a fast learner. Where shall we work?”

  “The sitting room?” Anna suggested.

  “Perfect.”

  After about an hour, Miles came for Violet. When they met, he took Anna's hand in his and welcomed her to the family. Miles was as handsome as Billy, but they didn’t look alike. Miles resembled Julia more. Anna felt warmed by their welcome. Of course, as far as they knew, she and Billy were in love and happily married.

  Billy tried to concentrate on writing his first sermon. He knew it would have to be extra good, being the first one, and that everyone would judge his abilities by it, first impressions, and all. No matter how hard he tried, he just couldn’t keep his mind on his task. That kiss on the cheek last night bot
hered him. Why had she done that? Hadn’t they agreed there would be no intimacy? He’d have to speak with her again. This was exactly the reason he didn’t want any romance in his life—It was just too distracting and he needed to give his work his full attention.

  After Violet left he called Anna into his office. She sat in the chair before his desk.

  “Anna, I hate to have to bring this up, but we agreed on no intimacy, did we not?”

  “Yes, and I understand, and agree.”

  “Then why did you kiss my cheek last night?” he asked.

  She shrugged. “I wanted to show my appreciation. I didn’t mean anything by it.”

  “I understand, and I value your appreciation, but please don’t do it again.”

  Anna stood, frowning. “You can bet I won’t. Is that all?”

  “Yes.”

  Anna left the room before she wound up giving him a piece of her mind. Since when was a simple kiss on the cheek considered intimacy? If that's what he thought, this man has a problem. A kiss on the cheek was the limit of affection anyone had ever shown to her. Her mother had always kissed her cheek, some of her mother's suitors had kissed her mother on the cheek, and Julia always kissed her cheek when they met.

  Anna decided to cool down, control herself, and try to pray. She decided to do it in her bedroom as it might take a while for even God to calm her down.

  Now that Dora was doing the housekeeping and had already unpacked all of their things, Anna was at a loss as to what to do with her time. She eagerly awaited her daily reading lessons, not only because it was something to do, but also because she sincerely liked Violet’s visits.

  One day during her lesson, Violet asked casually, “How did you and Billy meet and fall in love?”