Soul Matters

by Yolonda Tonette Sanders

  “Yeah, I’m fine.” She gave a reassuring nod.

  Michael and Wendy were back with the food that they had bought. Terrance, who had claimed earlier that he wasn’t hungry, was wiping his face and hands with a napkin.

  “Kim, there’s more chicken if you want some,” Wendy said. “Daddy figured that y’all would be here by the time we got back.”

  “No, I’m fine.” Kim sat down in the chair next to Terrance and laid her head on his shoulder.

  “How was she doing?” Michael asked.

  “The nurse is checking on her right now. Mama, I told her that I was coming out here to get you.”

  “Okay, I’ll give the nurse a few minutes to do what she needs to and then I’ll go back in there,” Marlene stated in between bites of her chicken.

  Kim had picked up a magazine and begun flipping through it when an alarming cry went out over the ICU airways.

  “Code Blue . . . 4736 . . . Code Blue!”

  Kim felt a knot in her stomach as her gut told her what was going on. 4736 was Frances’s room number. She dropped the magazine and instantly ran through the ICU doors, followed by her family. When everyone arrived in Frances’s room, doctors swarmed around her with machines trying to save her life. But there was nothing that anyone could do for Frances. Her monitors had flat-lined. A solemn atmosphere arose as the doctors pronounced the time of death.

  “No!” Kim cried, and thrust herself into Terrance’s arms. “No!” she repeated. “Why . . . Why now? She said that she loved me. Why did she go now?”

  Terrance held Kim tight as she sobbed. “I wish I had an answer for you, baby, I really do. Only God knows,” he sighed.

  Michael put his arms around his wife and Wendy. Neither of them was as emotional as Kim. Both ladies had prepared themselves for this. Even still, the reality of death was very unsettling.

  Chapter Thirty-Nine

  Not Guilty

  THOSE WHO WEREN’T ALREADY CRYING were soon brought to tears while listening to Gwen’s rendition of “Precious Lord.” Frances lay in her bronze-colored casket looking so peaceful dressed in a navy blue and white suit. If she could, Frances would probably have chosen to wear the blue house robe she loved so much. However, Marlene allowed Kim and Wendy to pick her mother’s burial outfit. Instead of choosing among the clothes Frances already had, the girls decided to buy her something new. Marlene was pleased with their selection and appreciated how her daughters were so eager to assist with all of the funeral arrangements.

  The church was packed with many members who came to pay their last respects and offer words of encouragement to the family. Frances was well known at Mount Calvary Missionary Church even if she wasn’t well liked. She’d had a reputation of being nosy and a gossip, and, unfortunately, very few members had gotten a chance to see how much she had changed in the last couple of months. Because it was more convenient for her to do so, Frances had been attending services at the senior center. Those who had spoken with her before she passed away and seen how different she had become were especially saddened by her untimely death, including Harold.

  Unbeknownst to anyone, Harold had taken a bus to visit Frances at the senior center a couple of weeks before she died. She was surprised, but glad to see him even though she hadn’t known he was coming. Besides the day he’d called for Marlene, when Kim eavesdropped on their conversation, it had been over forty years since the two of them had spoken. It was a tear-jerking moment. Unlike Marlene, who had noticed his scar, Frances took one look at him and instantly knew who he was.

  “Harold,” she said the moment he walked into her room.

  “Um . . . I know you didn’t expect me—but—I . . .” he stuttered. The two of them stared at each other for a few seconds. Both were uncertain about what to say. Harold wasn’t exactly sure why he had come in the first place. Part of him just wanted to see Frances and make peace with her after all these years.

  “I’m sorry”—Frances finally broke the silence and tears burst from her eyes—“I’m so sorry for keepin’ Marlene away from you.”

  Harold began to cry also. He hadn’t been sure she would welcome his visit, let alone apologize. Frances invited him to sit down, and the two of them spent an hour or so making amends with one another. “Take care of our baby,” were the very last words she spoke to him. Harold held her hand and promised that he would. He left the center that day and never saw Frances again until today, when she lay in her casket.

  Unfortunately, Otis didn’t attend the service. He hadn’t been to a funeral service since his mother died when he was eleven years old. He hoped to attend only two more during his lifetime: his uncle’s and his own, although he wasn’t looking forward to either of them. Plus Otis had never met Frances, so he didn’t feel that his presence was needed. However, he did send his condolences, along with a beautiful floral arrangement.

  After Gwen’s solo, Pastor Jones took his place in the pulpit as he prepared to share the things that were on his heart. “Today, we are gathered together because five days ago, one of our members departed from this earth and entered into the other side of life called eternity. I must warn you”—he paused—“I am not going to deliver a typical eulogy. As a matter of fact, I’m not sure that this should be called a eulogy at all. Usually when someone dies, we have a whole list of good things to say about that person’s life. That’s not the case here, is it? It’s no secret that Sister Frances wasn’t the most exemplary member of our church. In fact if y’all are honest, most of you who really knew her did not like her,” Pastor Jones said without biting his tongue.

  Several people in the congregation gasped, as no one had expected such an unusual introduction.

  “Sister Frances lived seventy-five years, and I believe that it was in the last few months of her life that she truly lived. You wonder what I mean by that, don’t you?” He smirked, knowing he had grabbed everyone’s attention. “I saw Sister Frances on several occasions before she passed away. I visited with her a few times when she was at the senior center, and I also saw her at the hospital the day she died. During all of my encounters with her, there was something different about her—something that brightened her smile, something that gave her peace, something that I’m not sure many of you have yet.” Pastor Jones took a sip of his water from the glass that sat on the podium.

  “At the age of seventy-five, Frances Eileen Gibson had developed a relationship with the Lord. That’s why the family has called this a ‘Home-Going Service.’ When Frances died, several days ago, she did so with peace because she knew that she was going home to be with the Lord. How many of you can honestly say the same thing? If, in the next hour, you took your last breath, would you spend eternity in heaven or hell?”

  The church was so silent that it was possible to hear a pin drop. Kim recalled wondering the same thing the day she heard on the news that a former employee of the Mid-Western Steel Plant had walked in and killed several of his co-workers. Without warning, their lives were rushed into eternity, but to which place?

  “What is the one thing that determines our destiny after we leave this earth?” Pastor Jones asked, although he was prepared to answer his own question. “I’ll tell you what: The only sure way to guarantee that you don’t spend eternity in hell is to have a relationship with Jesus Christ. In the last few months of her life, Frances got a revelation of what it really meant to accept Jesus as her savior and instantly she got a new start. Everything she had done wrong in her life became covered under the blood of Jesus when He died on the cross. Thus, Frances was free from the guilt of her past sins. We all have to stand before God one day. We will all be accountable to Him for the things that we’ve done in this life. But will we all be rendered a verdict of Not Guilty like Sister Frances was?”

  Pastor Jones searched the crowd for unbelieving faces. “Just in case you doubt what I have said, let me back it up with scripture. Turn to Second Corinthians 5:17.” He opened his Bible and waited while those who volunteered with the media ministry
projected the scripture onto the overhead screen. “Two Corinthians 5:17 states ‘If any man be in Christ, he [or she] is a new creature: old things are passed away; behold, all things are become new.’”

  “Perhaps many of you have become burdened by the sins of your past. Maybe you had children out of wedlock, were addicted to drugs, or you were promiscuous, you lied to people, you’ve stolen from people, or maybe you’ve basically been a good person all of your life and haven’t done any of these things. It’s funny that we put weights on sin. In our scheme of thinking, telling a small, white lie is not as serious as committing adultery. But in God’s eyes, it doesn’t matter how serious or minor our actions are—sin is sin, and the only way to be cleansed from sin is by accepting Jesus as your Lord and Savior. It’s very simple to do.” Pastor Jones took another drink of his water.

  “Turn to First John, first chapter and ninth verse. 1 John 1:9 says, ‘If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive us our sins, and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.’” He shut the Bible. “Frances did just that. She confessed her sins and she was forgiven of them. The Bible says that God is no respector of persons, meaning that what He did for Sister Frances, He’ll do for you if you’re willing to live your life for Him. He did it for me, as well as several others who are present in the church today. Just because I’m a pastor it doesn’t mean that I was born saved. There was an anointing on my life to preach, but I had to confess my sins and accept Jesus into my life just like everyone else.”

  The musicians and choir took their cues from Pastor Jones and began to play a hymn softly. “Perhaps you want to give your life to Christ but you are afraid of what others will say. Those who know the things you’ve done wrong wouldn’t likely accept you or believe you if you were to tell them you got saved. Fortunately, salvation frees us from being bound by other people’s opinions or perceptions of us. God doesn’t care what people think about us, especially when we first get saved. One of the tricks that satan uses to deter us from salvation is whispering in our ear that no one will believe us. But guess what? Actions speak louder than words. Over time, those people who initially doubt your salvation will be able to see the difference in your behavior. The change that takes place on the inside of you once you accept Jesus Christ as your Savior will display itself on the outside. It’s inevitable. The most important thing you can do is give your life to Christ. No matter how much money you make, what kind of titles you hold, how many committees you serve on, God is not impressed. To Him, it’s the condition of every soul that matters. Your soul matters! I know this is a burial service, but I feel led by the Holy Spirit to open the altar for anyone who is ready to accept Jesus. Won’t you come today and make the decision that will give you the assurance of knowing that, if you never see another day on earth, you will spend the rest of your days of eternity in heaven?”

  The musicians were still playing softly as Kim considered Pastor Jones’s plea. Is this my time? she thought. Can I really commit to Christ?

  A little voice inside her head cried out, “Yes!”

  But how? My sister backslid, and her entire life she has been more faithful to God than I have been.

  “You’re not accountable for the actions of others, only your own.”

  But what about all of the things I have done wrong? I’m no angel, you know.

  “Yes, I know. All you have to do is accept and acknowledge Me as your Savior and I will take care of the rest.”

  But what about—

  “What about Me? I am everything you need. You have sinned, but I have come that you may have life and have it more abundantly!”

  There was nothing left to ponder. Kim hearkened unto the voice and was among the first to walk up front. Surprisingly, she was not alone. Terrance felt led to walk up with her, as he too desired to be saved.

  “Maybe you have already given your life to Christ before, but for one reason or another you have strayed away from Him,” Pastor Jones said. “Sometimes situations happen in our life and instead of turning to God, we turn away from Him. But what I love about God so much is that even though we may give up on Him, He never gives up on us. In Jeremiah 3:14, God says that He is married to the backslider. He wants to restore the relationship you once had. In fact, He wants to make it better.”

  Wendy wept as she realized she had made a mess of her marriage this past year. Mainly because she hadn’t sought God’s help in solving her problems; she had always tried to do everything on her own. It had been six weeks since she had discovered that Kevin really hadn’t committed adultery. Although the two of them had spoken since then, neither had brought up their marriage or pending divorce. Wendy still wanted to give her marriage another try, but she wasn’t going to force the issue with Kevin. Before she could restore her marriage, she knew that she needed to restore her relationship with God.

  “I’m so sorry!”she said to God and fell to her knees and cried. She hadn’t even noticed that Kim and Terrance had walked to the altar, although they were all sitting in the same row. Wendy momentarily had tunnel vision. The only thing she could see was the need in her life for God. Without Him, nothing else mattered.

  Wendy continued sobbing and asking for forgiveness until she felt someone tap her shoulder. It was Kevin. She got up and hugged him. She thought he’d come up merely to offer moral support, but Kevin had other plans in mind. As he listened to Pastor Jones, he recognized the need in his life for Jesus and wanted a relationship with Him.

  “Together we’ll live out our Christian walk as husband and wife,” he whispered to Wendy, and gave her a warm smile.

  Wendy’s mouth fell open and Kevin embraced her. “Thank You,”she whispered to God, closing her eyes.

  The musicians began to play even more softly as Pastor Jones got ready to pray with those who had come forth. Kim, who hadn’t wanted to interrupt Wendy earlier while she was praying, took the opportunity to hold Wendy’s hand after she and Kevin finished their embrace.

  Pastor Jones looked at the number of people who had come forth. He smiled when he saw Wendy’s husband standing next to her. He had been praying for them since the day he’d run into Wendy at the diner. “Praise God,” he said aloud. “I want all of you to repeat this prayer after me.” Line by line, Kim, Wendy, Terrance, Kevin, and all the others who wanted to give their lives to Christ repeated the following words:

  Dear Heavenly Father,

  I confess that I am a sinner. I come to You in the name of Jesus asking for forgiveness of my sins. I believe in my heart that Jesus died on the cross for my sins, was raised from the dead, and is the only Lord and Savior of the world. Right now, I ask Jesus to come into my heart and cleanse me from all unrighteousness. I believe that I am saved. I believe that my past is forgiven. I believe that I am a new creation in Christ Jesus. Thank You, Lord, for saving me. Amen.

  Marlene was filled with joy. After Frances had died, she’d spent her private time with God asking Him to help her understand what good could come out of her mother’s death. She loved Romans 8:28, but she couldn’t comprehend why Frances had died just as they were rebuilding their relationship. Today, God answered that prayer by using Frances’s death to bring her family closer to Him. No matter what Terrance, Kim, Wendy, Kevin, or anyone else had done, if they met God tonight, all would be rendered a verdict of Not Guilty.

  Chapter Forty

  Unconditional Love

  THE CROWD BROKE OUT IN CHEERS when Gwen caught Kim’s bridal bouquet. She had mesmerized the wedding guests during the ceremony when she sang “Unconditional Love,”a song she’d written specifically for Kim and Terrance. Now she stood next to the gentleman who’d caught the garter belt as they posed for a picture with the bride and groom.

  Terrance and Kim made a good-looking couple. He was dressed in a black tuxedo with a purple vest and a silverish purple tie. Kim was absolutely stunning in her wedding dress. She had found white satin shoes with clear heels to match the sequins on her dress.

  “Baby, I’ll
be back. I see one of my relatives I want to say hi to,” Terrance said to his wife.

  “Okay,” Kim said, and gave her husband a peck.

  “Oh, please,” Gwen teased. “Y’all can do better than that!”

  “Oh, be quiet. We’ll see how you do on your wedding day,” Kim responded.

  Gwen gave her a smirk as if to say Don’t even get started. She knew that Kim was going to pick on her about her new beau since she’d caught the bouquet and he’d caught the garter belt.

  “This just may be a sign—the two of you seem to be getting pretty cozy,” Kim said, unable to resist the temptation.

  Gwen and her friend laughed.

  “I will have to admit the two of you look very good together.” She pointed at the gentleman. “I just can’t get over how much you’ve changed. You’re not all scrawny like you used to be.”

  “Why, thank you, lil’ ’cuz,” Otis said, and flexed his muscles. “I guess drinking milk did my body good after all,” he joked. Otis had indeed stepped up a few notches and had changed himself from a pseudo-pimp into a nice-looking man. He had stopped wearing his fake gold jewelry, invested in some contacts, and started working out that year. The locks of his Jheri Curl were now in the trash as he sported a nice, clean cut. He had sort of a Wesley Snipes appeal going on. There was, however, one thing Otis wasn’t willing to change about his appearance. No matter what, he wasn’t ready to get rid of his gold tooth. It had been his trademark for many years.

  In her wildest dreams, Kim would never have imagined that Gwen and Otis would be compatible. The two of them had become interested in each other about a month ago at a barbecue Marlene had held at her house. Otis had debuted his new look then. In fact, Gwen barely recognized him from the time she had met him at Christmas. Otis kept Gwen laughing the entire day. When the barbecue was over, the two of them exchanged telephone numbers and had been getting to know each other ever since.