Godforsaken: Book 1 (Shade of Light)

by Suren Hakobyan

  Lily stared ahead into the blueness of the sky. Her mind was farther away than the endless space above. Why was she so important? She was the key? What for? Why her? There were so many questions that needed answers, but Beelzebub, who was sitting next to her, seemed unwilling to tell her anything anymore. If he had come to rescue her, then why was he keeping these secrets from her?

  “Where are we going now?” Lily tore her eyes away from the sky.

  “To a safe place,” Beelzebub replied with a mutter.

  “Yeah, I see, but where is that place?” She demanded.

  “Why are you nervous?” Beelzebub grinned at her, but it was a forced smile. “I’m taking you to the place you’ve belonged since you were born.”

  “I see we’re out of the city now,” she noticed, glancing out the window. “You didn’t tell me it was going to be so far away.”

  “I didn’t tell you anything about that, Lily. I just told you to trust me. What’s happened to make you so curious now?”

  “If you’ve come here to help me, then why do you keep secrets from me?” she grumbled.

  “Secrets?” Beelzebub laughed. “I don’t have secrets. What do you want to know?”

  “I’ve already told you,” Lily sniffed. “I want to know where are we going?”

  “I believe you know the answer yourself.” He looked on as Lily’s expression shifted. Why did she suddenly remember her dreams about the prince wearing white clothes taking her to a garden? “Yes, I’m talking about him,” Beelzebub attested, as though he had read her mind. Lily peered at him, wondering if she had thought aloud. “You know he’s waiting for you. You saw him in your dreams, you knew he would find you.”

  “Who is he?” Lily asked with a low voice. If Beelzebub was telling her the truth, then she was going to see the prince who had been dogging her in her dreams for all her life. But she had longed for Samael even before meeting him. That green-eyed man had changed everything in her world. That man was the man whom she was running away from now.

  “He’s your past and future,” Beelzebub said. “You belong to each other. You always did, but the man sitting up there,” he pointed up, “thought differently. And do you know why?”

  He bent close to her and whispered, “Because he doesn’t know what real love is. He doesn’t know the passion, the moment when two bodies become as one.”

  Beelzebub smiled with a supercilious look, letting Lily take her time. She tilted her eyes down, diving deep into her thoughts and considering his words. Then the answer popped into her head briefly, and it dawned on her that somebody had planted the idea in her head.

  Lily’s eyes got wide involuntarily when she raised them to glance at Beelzebub. “You’re not an angel, are you?” she said, her voice barely a whisper.

  “I told you I was some kind of angel,” he corrected her. “We’re the same creatures, but we have different goals. Before jumping to conclusions, let me show you the world, the future you will have. You deserve to at least see what belongs to you, something the guys up there won’t give you, no way.”

  “You’re taking me to hell, aren’t you?” Lily asked desperately.

  “Hell?” Beelzebub laughed loudly. “You’ve got a false impression about that place. You think it’s a scary place in fire and full of tortured souls?”

  “Isn’t it?” Lily cut him off.

  Beelzebub glared at her, taking some time to gather his thoughts. “Listen, Lily,” he began. “It’s about politics; the place you call Hell, or the residents of it. Look at me, do I look like the devil you used to see on TV, or in fantasy films? Tell me, when you look at me, do you see a scary face, or red eyes, or black skin and ugly wings on my back? Do I blow fire out through my nose?”

  Lily kept silent. For some seconds she couldn’t believe she wasn’t dreaming. Soon Nancy’s voice would wake her up, and Beelzebub, Samael, and even the car she was in now would vanish into the depths of her dream. But nothing was happening, Nancy’s voice was silent, and she was left alone with this eerie creature, the devil or whoever.

  “Lily, you really have nothing to worry about. You’ll be a princess, you’ll see I’m right. You’ve always been waiting for him, you just didn’t know it yet.”

  Lily peeked up at his black and gleaming eyes. She knew that half of her believed Beelzebub, and that half helped her not to panic and sit tight. She had accepted this trip to find out who the man from her dreams was. But the other part ordered her to wake herself from this nightmare. Just the other morning she hadn’t had any clue about angels and devils or any other world except the typical life people live.

  She tucked her hair behind her ear and glanced out the window. Who knew, maybe it was her last dawn she was seeing along the blue horizon. The sun seemed very lazy to her today, like it wasn’t going to show its beautiful body as soon as Lily hoped.

  In contrast to it, she saw a blaze swooping out of the depths of dark space and down into the atmosphere. It was too fast to be followed by human eyes, but Beelzebub’s eyes caught it. Before Lily could let out any noise, Beelzebub turned to the driver and howled:

  “Stop the car! Now!”

  The driver slammed on the brakes. Lily was thrown against the seat in front of her. She hadn’t much time to wonder what was going on and why the falling object had made Beelzebub stagger and change the plans.

  “Stay in the car!” he ordered her, and leaped out.

  As the door of the car swung open, Lily felt a strong wind breaking in and ruffling her hair. She turned to look out again and saw the falling object changing its trajectory, bending toward the cars. It wasn’t a meteorite, someone was controlling its movements. A missile? I live in a different world, Lily thought to herself, and an abrupt thought washed over her–an ANGEL.

  Holding her breath, she reached for the handle and opened the door. In a second, she leaped out the car. The strong wind found her quickly. The dust blowing up from the ground possessed her, and she closed her eyes.

  “You two,” she heard Beelzebub’s yell while she cupped her face with her hands, “stay with her. Protect her.”

  In no time Lily felt two hands catching her arms. She opened her eyes and two bouncers leaped into her view, standing on both her sides, but she didn’t care about them now.

  The fiery thing rushed down, coloring the sky above them fire-orange. Lily peeked up to follow the unbelievable phenomenon. It fell far from them, but the moment before it hit the ground, its momentum slowed considerably and it landed much more softly than she expected it would.

  The ground quaked as the feet of the creature within the fire hit the asphalt. A shockwave of air exploded out around the impact, almost knocking Lily down, but the guards kept her on her feet. The asphalt shattered, spreading toward the cars before stopping just in front Lily. Puffs of dust arose. The creature’s landing sounded like thunder.

  Lily peered around in astonishment. It was really unbelievable how much was going on around her. Dust filled the air, building a wall between her, Beelzebub and the others. Lily’s heart fluttered as she recognized the creature being released from the clouds. It was barefoot and bare chested, with malice-filled green eyes darting around at the people close to it. It was Samael, the devil who had once been banished out hell. Lily didn’t care who Samael had used to be, devil or angel or just an average man. When he appeared, she felt hope and protection.

  Seeing Samael, Lily seemed to forget everything Beelzebub had told her about him. Her heart began beating, and life came back into her soul. Samael’s presence possessed her with its magical charm. He was the one who could make her legs tremble, make time would stop for her, make her unable to control herself every time they met.

  For the first time, Lily didn’t think she was crazy about the surreal happenings going on before her eyes. Like an eagle, Samael opened his large, gray wings. He knelt down on one knee, leaning against the asphalt, his hair scattered around his face, but she could see his eyes clearly despite it. The pupils were blown wide a
gainst the greenness of his irises, and Lily had never seen such gloriousness before. Should she be scared? No, she knew for sure that behind those eyes hid the man who would rescue, protect and love her. Wouldn’t he?

  Beelzebub stood motionless, statue-like, his savage eyes locked on the fallen creature. The others gathered around him, like bodyguards ready to defend him with their lives. Kali came forward and stood a step ahead of him, balling his hands into fists.

  “You have no right to use your power upon Earth, Samael,” Beelzebub growled.

  Lily peered uncomprehendingly at him, then at Samael, then again at Beelzebub.

  “Release the girl,” Samael announced, but not in the way one normally speaks. His mouth remained shut, and his voice didn’t come out of his throat. Instead, it sounded in Lily’s head, like Samael was inside her. She studied the others, wondering whether they had heard him, too.

  “Why should I?” Beelzebub said. Clearly she wasn’t the only one who had heard Samael’s proclamation. “You have no right to demand that. And even if you had, I haven’t kidnapped her by any means. She joined me willingly.” Lily knew he was right, but now she regretted that choice, and was ready to get away from him as soon as possible.

  She felt like herself again, the way she reasoned she had been before she had met Beelzebub. Something had worn off her since Samael had appeared, a power that had been squeezing her head.

  “I don’t want to come with you,” she squealed, trying to free her arms from the guards’ grasp. They were protecting her from the creature, Samael, but it was Samael’s protection she longed for now. It didn’t matter who Samael was–a human or an angel, or even a devil. She felt that somehow, it was better to die at his hands than live like a princess in hell.

  Beelzebub glanced at her, surprise written on his face. “You don’t understand what you’re talking about, Lily. He,” Beelzebub pointed to Samael, “isn’t the right one to follow. Did you forget that he tried to break your line, to kill your predecessors?” he reminded her.

  “Why should I believe what you say?” Lily smirked. Beelzebub opened his mouth to reply, but it remained open with no sound.

  “Release the girl, Beelzebub,” Samael’s hoarse voice echoed through everybody’s head again, this time sounding angrier.

  “Samael, you can’t. We should consider this. You have to follow the rules signed in the Torah,” Beelzebub roared. “You know the punishment if you break the law, you’ll be locked away forever like Azazel.”

  Samael didn’t reply or even move. He waited patiently, as if he hadn’t even heard Beelzebub.

  Lily heard noises from the real world. The sound of car horns, wandering through the air from the other side of the dust barrier, but nobody dared to drive into the circle where she was. It was understandable. Who had seen such a phenomenon before?

  “You have to remember, we can use the power on Earth when somebody moves against us.” That was Kali, who closed his right hand into a fist so hard that his nails dug into his palms.

  Samael kept silent again, but Lily saw black smoke gathering around his right hand. He lifted off from the ground and took an attacking stance. Something terrible was going to happen soon, she knew. She felt her stomach flutter, and fear flooded her body as she imagined a fight between such inhuman creatures.

  “Kali, don’t you dare–” Beelzebub was about to give an order, but the man had already made a lunge toward Samael. Kali himself jumped high up into the air, higher than humanly possible. Lily saw a glittering sword appear in Kali’s right hand while he was still in the air. At the same time, Kali swooped down toward Samael. She looked ahead in fear, a shriek escaping her. Only a second’s delay kept Kali’s sword from slicing Samael into two parts.

  What happened the next moment Lily didn’t realize at the time. She had to wait for understanding until it was already over. The black smoke that had been gathering around Samael’s hand formed itself into a dark gray sword just before Kali reached him. Then Samael deftly sprang to his feet, faster than light, and an invisible but powerful wave escaped Samael. The wave slowed down time. Kali fell in slow motion. Samael struck.

  Lily saw the gray winged creature standing victorious, hiding his eyes behind his brown ruffled hair, with a long black sword in his right hand. Behind him, Kali tumbled down on the asphalt, parted in two. In no time, his body smoked and rose up. Mingling with the air, it vanished in the dust.

  Lily uttered a short scream and clapped her hands to her mouth. The other guards made a step toward Samael, preparing themselves for the upcoming fight. But Beelzebub, who had been watching this performance with malicious eyes, interrupted.

  “Stop!” he howled loudly, and Lily could swear that his voice quaked the even cars waiting outside the dust circle. “You prats, do you realize what you’re dealing with?” he went on in indignation. “This is not just any dog of heaven. He’s one of the archangels of The Great Nine.”

  Everybody stood still, as if it was rooted to the ground. Beelzebub made a step toward Samael, but only one. Try as he might to look fearless, his eyes betrayed him – he was scared of Samael.

  Samael lowered his wings and they folded against his back.

  “The girl is going with me, Beelzebub,” Samael spoke in the normal way this time, through his mouth. He scowled at Beelzebub, as though he was trying to force fear into him with merely his look.

  Beelzebub nodded reluctantly. Then, Samael raised his inhuman eyes on Lily. “Get into the car,” he ordered fiercely.

  The two guards on both her sides stepped away from her. First, Lily peered into Samael’s green eyes, but it lasted only a few seconds. She gathered her senses momentarily, as if somebody had jabbed her in the back.

  Lily opened the door quickly and flung herself into the backseat. She heard some voices and the sound of police cars from opposite the dust wall. Then the door closed, and the world muted with that.

  Samael headed toward the driver door, saying something back to Beelzebub, but Lily couldn’t hear him. The only thing she noticed was that if Beelzebub thought he had even a small chance against Samael, Beelzebub would tear Samael apart. But daring to attack Samael meant certain death. He was walking deity, his gray sword held tight in his hand. He didn’t even look at anybody. She caught a glimpse of his flaming eyes – they were beautiful and dreadful in equal measure.

  The two guards who had been looking after her stepped aside as Samael reached the door and opened it. The sounds of the outside world poured into the car again, the high wind howling, but silence reigned again once the door was shut. The car was filled only with Samael’s scent now. His sword vanished in the air like the smoke it had been.

  Samael brushed his hair out of his eyes and turned the key, and the engine came to life. He threw the car into reverse, drove back quickly, and then pushed the pedal to drive. Lily was thrown back against the seat as the car started off with a screech, forcing its way through the dust barrier. There was a traffic jam opposite the wall in spite of the early morning.

  Despite Lily, who was left to stare out the window at the police cars and fire engines, Samael rushed away without devoting his attention to anyone or anything else. Lily glanced back at the scene. The dust had already settled down, but neither Beelzebub nor his followers could be seen. She looked ahead; opposite the windshield there was New York, illuminated by the morning sun.

  10. The Church

  One dangerous stranger had replaced by another. Only heaven knew what Samael had intended to do to Lily – would he love and embrace her like he had done that night, or would he kill her in the same way he had killed her great-great-grandfather? He must have had some kind of reason for it. The reason itself, Lily hadn’t conceived yet, but she could never grasp it. Samael might steal her from Beelzebub for his own purpose, as she was the key. The question was what for?

  Now Lily was in the same car with only hell knew what kind of creature. She felt a jolt of nervousness in her hands and legs. Looking down on her palms, she s
aw her hands shaking. Her heart began hammering like she was a rabbit being pursued by a wolf. The wolf in question kept silent as he drove the car back to New York. Lily wished he would speak first and break the quiet, but soon it became clear that the gray-winged man wasn’t going to start a conversation.

  “Where are you taking me?” she dared to speak as the pressure of the silence became almost unbearable.

  Samael glanced in the rear-view mirror and Lily saw his eyes had changed back into a normal human’s. They no longer frightened her as they had before.

  “To the city,” Samael murmured, a surprising firmness in his tone. “I need to hide you now.”

  “You aren’t going to kill me, are you?” Lily blurted out. She felt a flutter in her stomach. The seconds seemed to stretch forever until Samael finally replied.

  “As I recall, I just saved you,” Samael reminded her, sounding displeased. “If I wanted to kill you, I would’ve done it in the company of those assholes.”

  “But you killed my–” she croaked, “You wanted to break Eve’s line. I’m her heir, aren’t I?” Samael didn’t try to justify himself or even protest. He kept driving, his hands on the wheel, wholly unfazed. “Please, tell me,” Lily resumed, “what has changed in you, that you don’t want me dead?”

  Instead of answering, Samael looked up at the sky. Lily hadn’t noticed that the sun had vanished behind angry clouds, or the morning’s lucid sky had disappeared in the endless gray. Was it coincidence, or was Heaven itself mad at what Samael had done down here, on Earth?

  “We’ve got to wait now. I can’t take you back home,” Samael said. He tore his eyes away from the sky. “They know.”

  “Yeah, I think I’ve already guessed that,” Lily muttered. “Do they need me too? The angels, I mean.”

  “The bet is about you,” Samael’s voice was curt.

  “Bet? What does that mean?”

  “Not now. Keep your questions for the next time,” he said coldly, but then added gently, “baby.”