I Am Yours (Heartbeat #3)

by Faith Sullivan

  “What do you mean…a monster?” She blinks up at him, a dangerous gleam in her eyes.

  “You know exactly what I mean, and if you don’t want him to see this video, you’re going to put an end to whatever the hell he’s doing to us.” Adam lowers himself to the floor, preventing Kelly from avoiding his gaze.

  “Adam, he’s a genius. You don’t know what you’re talking about. He only wanted to help you.” She sounds so sincere that it’s hard to tell if she’s lying. “George is a good man, a pioneer in his field. He’s going to make a difference in so many lives.”

  “Kelly, he experimented on us without our consent. Yeah, he sure sounds like an ethical human being,” I grumble behind her. “You let him use us like we were his puppets. How could you stand back and let that happen?”

  “You don’t know him like I do,” Kelly says adamantly. “George has devoted his life to working with patients suffering from post-traumatic stress disorder.”

  “Then why all the secrecy?” Adam asks, determined to get an answer. “Why were we kept in the dark?”

  “Because he needed a blind study. You couldn’t know what he was doing or the results would be skewed.” Kelly brings her hands to rest on her belly. “We were in a bit of a time crunch, and I needed to act fast. He asked me if I knew anybody who might fit the criteria and you were the first two who came to mind. It was completely innocent. I swear.”

  “How much money is at stake?” Undeterred, Adam continues to prod.

  “Potentially millions if George succeeds and no one beats him to the punch. The military is concerned with how the number of suicides has increased over the past few years. Medication doesn’t seem to be working and they’re desperate for a new approach.” Kelly wipes away a stray tear trickling down her cheek. “I didn’t think being a part of the study would do any harm. You were the perfect candidates, and I thought you’d see nothing but positive results.”

  “Yeah, well, we didn’t,” I say glumly.

  “Really, Katie?” she asks, placing her hand behind her back for support. “Are you still having problems with intimacy?”

  “Kelly, back the fuck off.” Adam’s voice is murderous.

  “No, I’m not afraid of her, Adam. Let her know what a farce this whole thing is.” I join them, sitting on the floor. “I was fine up until Brian’s big revelation on the beach. I guess the stress that caused threw everything out of whack.”

  “And what about you, Adam?” Kelly’s attention shifts to him. “Do you still blame yourself for not saving that girl in the movie theater parking lot?”

  “I’m still having nightmares about it, if that’s what you mean.” He glares at Kelly from under his sandy eyelashes.

  “Really? That’s not supposed to be happening. I already told George to discontinue your treatment.” Kelly seems ruffled, like things aren’t turning out the way she thought they would. “I saw you that morning in the Outer Banks and it scared me. I called George after that and he promised to stop the trial. We’d already collected all the data we needed. When you met Katie, that was supposed to be the end of it.”

  “It doesn’t seem like it. Adam had another nightmare yesterday.” I’m certainly not about to let Kelly off the hook that easily.

  “And that’s why I’m here. I couldn’t believe it when you told me. I had to come and see for myself.” Kelly massages her temples, the tension getting to her.

  “You have to make him stop, Kelly. This can’t go on any longer,” Adam declares forcefully.

  “I’ll talk to him again,” Kelly says in a rush.

  “Talk to him now.” I’m sick of her false promises. It’s about time she delivered on them.

  “Uh, okay. Can you hand me my bag?” She points across the room, and I retrieve it for her. It’s super heavy, bulging with manila folders. Rooting through it, she pulls out her phone. Her gaze shifts between Adam and me. “Maybe I should do this in private?”

  “Kelly, cut the crap and just call him already.” Adam sighs, raking his fingers through his hair.

  “All right, fine,” she huffs, thumbing through her contact list. “He’s not going to like this, you know. He might get really mad and—”

  “And what? Leave you? Fire you? Good, I hope he does.” I can’t help it. Hearing how she only cares about herself is pissing me off—big time.

  “But where am I going to go, Katie?” she whines, holding off hitting the call button. “I’ll be right back at square one.”

  “Maybe you should have thought of that before you did all this.” Adam lectures her without an ounce of sympathy. “You better ask him if there are any side effects for stopping this form of hypnosis. Because as soon as you hang up, we’re getting new phone numbers and cutting him out of our lives completely.”

  “I don’t think that’s wise, Adam. George is a powerful man. He’s not going to let you just walk away, especially if he thinks you’re a promising candidate for his study. He has too much invested in you now.” Her voice trembles when she considers the possibilities looming in front of her. “It looks like he’s finished with Katie since she hasn’t been dreaming of you. His phone calls to her have probably stopped. But if he’s still contacting you…”

  “I don’t get it. You said all he needed was for me to meet Katie and I did. So why cut one of us out of the study and not the other?” Adam’s eyes are blazing as he questions her.

  “I don’t know, Adam. Really, I don’t.” She lowers the phone to her lap, putting off the inevitable.

  “Did you do something more to Adam in the Outer Banks, Kelly?” The idea pops into my head, and I immediately put her on the spot. “I saw you come out of his room.”

  “Jada was a complication we didn’t expect,” she mutters. “I didn’t know about her until Adam said he was bringing a plus one to the wedding. When I told George about her, he got pretty upset. He said she was a variable that could throw off his calculations. Adam couldn’t be in love with two people at the same time or we wouldn’t get an accurate reading for the study.”

  “How was he monitoring us anyway?” Adam asks, perturbed.

  “George would turn on the FaceTime applications on your phones to gauge your progress. He would plant ideas into your heads by voicing them through the speakers of your phones while you were asleep as a type of subliminal messaging system.” Kelly seems fatigued as she leans against the couch.

  “Did he turn our webcams on during the day?” I rub my arms as a creepy vibe washes over me. What if he spied on me changing my clothes—or doing other things?

  “Only periodically to see how well you were doing in your daily lives but not as frequently as his nighttime calls. That’s how we knew Jada was Adam’s new partner, but we had no clue that he was dating her,” Kelly continues, seemingly lost in thought.

  “I wasn’t dating her,” Adam protests.

  “But you wanted to?” I can’t help asking.

  “I don’t know. Not really. I was too caught up in you to even think about anyone else,” he admits grudgingly.

  “But that’s not exactly true, is it?” Kelly pipes in. “There must have been something there or George wouldn’t have asked me to conduct a hands-on session with you. It’s risky repeating the initial hypnosis after you’ve already been put under. I was surprised George had me do it to you again, but he was worried how Jada was affecting things. Resisting your feelings for her was causing a buildup of stress in you that he didn’t like.”

  “So if Jada hadn’t entered the picture or Brian hadn’t spilled the beans, would Adam and I even be questioning our feelings for each other right now?” My cheeks burn when I feel Adam looking at me.

  “Those two factors became pretty major obstacles when it came to your recovery, that much is certain.” She nods her head slightly, agreeing with my theories.

  “You’re telling me we were supposed to fall in love? That was the cure?” Adam sounds absolutely flabbergasted. “You’ve got to be kidding me. All that just to brainwash us int
o developing feelings for each other?”

  “Kelly, it’s pretty farfetched to think that Dr. Savoy could develop some kind of mental love potion.” I’m trying to get a handle on things, but I’m as floored as Adam. “Seems kind of naïve for someone so educated and respected in the field.”

  “I told you, George is a romantic at heart. He only wants what’s best for his patients. He wants them to be happy.” It’s scary to see how much Kelly believes in this quack.

  “Did he ever hear of free will? Obviously not if he thinks he can play matchmaker like some psychologically demented Cupid.” Disgusted, Adam pushes himself up off the floor and gets to his feet. “Call him now, Kelly, and get me the hell off his list.”

  “So this is it? You’re just going to give up on Katie so easily? You’re not even going to try to make it work with her?” Clumsily, she hauls herself into a standing position, but he still towers over her. “You two could be so good together. I’ve seen the way you look at each other. Why don’t you at least give it some time? It’s worth giving your feelings a second chance.”

  “Why, Kelly? To save your skin? Our entire relationship is built on a lie. There’s no moving forward from something like this. We’d always question whether what we have is real or if we were duped into believing someone else’s fantasy.” Getting angry, I’m grateful that Adam gives me his hand as he pulls me up to stand between them. “Whether you like it or not, it’s over. What we had never really existed in the first place. It was just a bunch of smoke and mirrors that clouded our judgment.”

  “Kelly, it’s time for you to make it right. Quit horsing around and call him already. I’m not going to ask you again.” Adam tilts his head in the direction of her phone, indicating what he wants her to do.

  Without another word, she picks it up, hitting the button.

  “Put it on speaker,” Adam commands.

  The number of rings begins to multiply as Adam clenches and unclenches his jaw.

  “Hello?” I’m filled with longing when I hear the smoothness of Dr. Savoy’s voice on the other end of the line. It’s one I’m deeply familiar with, my unconscious responding warmly to hearing it in a wakeful state. I haven’t talked to him in weeks, but I’d know his voice anywhere. It’s the calm within the storm.

  I look over at Adam and he’s holding on to the armrest of the couch, a tortured expression on his face. He recognizes it too and it’s throwing him for a loop. He doesn’t have pleasant associations with that voice—only pain.

  “Honey, it’s me. We have a bit of a problem here.” Kelly speaks soothingly into the receiver.

  “Where are you, love?” The rich timbre of Dr. Savoy’s reply fills the room.

  “I’m with Katie and Adam actually.” She pauses, taking a deep breath. “They found out about the study, and they’re not too happy about it. They wanted me to call and see if you could let them drop out. I know how important their participation is to you—”

  “Listen, Savoy. I’m through playing games. You’re going to stop spying on us. You’re going to stop calling us. You’re going to stop messing with our heads. This ends today. Do you understand?” Adam’s dander is up as he takes the phone out of Kelly’s hand.

  “I’m afraid that’s not possible, Mr. O’Malley. You’re too deeply entrenched now. I’d fear for your psychological well-being, if we just stopped your treatments.” Dr. Savoy is so cool, so collected. It’s frightening, like we’re all children and he’s the adult.

  “You never asked for our permission, Dr. Savoy, and that’s illegal. Do you really want us to go to the police with this?” Inspired by Adam’s courage, I take a stand in backing him up.

  “That’s funny, Miss Turner. I thought you were a patient of mine.” Dr. Savoy chuckles softly. “I can’t help it if your paranoidal tendencies are getting in the way of your recovery.”

  “So that’s how you’re gonna play it, huh?” Adam narrows his eyes, seething.

  “Mr. O’Malley, do you really want to go there? What, with your alcoholism and marijuana addiction? And let’s not forget about that poor old man and his wife you injured while driving under the influence. I’m sure your boss wouldn’t want that getting out now, would he?” His threat is coated in politeness, making it sound even more sinister. “I have a lot of colleagues in the law school here at Penn who would be more than willing to back up my story. Besides, can you even afford an attorney to make these wild accusations on your behalf, Mr. O’Malley?”

  “So you’re going to leave me hanging indefinitely?” The fight seeps out of him as he sinks onto the couch. “I’m just going to be your guinea pig until you’re done with me?”

  “No, not at all,” Dr. Savoy responds. “But you’re going to stay away from Kelly. I just downloaded that video from your phone, and while it’s an impressive display, I’m not buying it.” A haughty undertone enters his voice. “She might have some sort of fixation with you, but I’m working to remove that. And having you in the picture isn’t helping her progress.”

  “Oh no, George. You saw that?” Kelly covers her face with her hands, mortified. “Honey, I didn’t mean—”

  “It’s all right, sweetheart. Relax. We’ll take care of it when you get back,” he reassures her, but it doesn’t sit well with me, having my cousin under his thumb again.

  “And what if she refuses?” I say, striding up to the receiver.

  “Katie, don’t,” Kelly warns, her eyes wide with fear.

  “Seeing that Kelly wants to terminate Adam’s participation from my study and the fact that she’s carrying my child doesn’t put her in much of a bargaining position, now does it?” Dr. Savoy has the upper hand in all of this and he knows it.

  “And if I come back, will you let Adam go?” Kelly asks quietly.

  “I’m not too happy about having to start over, but I’m going to need your assistance in finding new test subjects, seeing how Miss Martin caused more damage than I initially believed.” A chill runs through me when he mentions Jada. I glance over at Adam and his jaw tightens.

  “I’ll be home in two hours. We’ll talk then,” Kelly says as if she’s trying to placate a toddler ready to throw a tantrum.

  “I’ll be waiting, sweetheart. Drive safe,” Dr. Savoy croons, making my skin crawl. He doesn’t love my cousin as a person. He only sees her as a possession, a plaything. Someone he can manipulate into doing whatever he wants. She can’t go back to him—she can’t.

  “I will, darling. See you soon,” Kelly proclaims, a false cheerfulness echoing in her farewell.

  “Kelly—” I start, but she doesn’t let me finish.

  “What’s done is done, Katie.” She smiles at me sadly. “There’s no going back now. As they say, I made my bed and now I have to lie in it.”

  “But he’s practically a criminal,” Adam grumbles. “He’ll lock you up in that fancy mansion of his and never let you out of his sight. You’ll be nothing more than a prisoner. Did he even offer to marry you?”

  “No.” She shakes her head mournfully. “Only your brother had the decency to do that after I blackmailed him into it.”

  “What a mess,” I moan, pulling my hair away from my face.

  “But I created it. And it’s about time I took responsibility for cleaning it up. I thought I’d have everything I ever wanted. Trampling over anyone who got in my way.” She stares absently into space as if imagining a different outcome. “I was angry with Brian when, after five years of dating and living together, he never proposed. I wanted to hurt him.” She frowns deeply. “Yeah, I have a thing for you, Adam. I mean, who wouldn’t? Brian was always jealous of you, and I knew I could use that to get what I wanted from him. Too bad it blew up in my face, huh?”

  “But how does Savoy factor into everything? He knew you were going to marry Brian, even if the baby was his.” Adam sits up, encouraging her to explain.

  “George didn’t know the baby was his. He thought it was yours.” She looks at Adam guiltily. “I only submitted to a paternity
test after Brian left me at the altar. That’s what I was doing after you left yesterday. I had to tell George the truth because I had nowhere else to turn. Adam, you’re unemployed, living hundreds of miles away. There was nothing you could do for me. Besides, I couldn’t hide it from George anymore. I was sick of lying.”

  “Why were you trying to pin it on Adam, though? I don’t get it.” I stare at my cousin in disbelief. “Dr. Savoy is definitely the better prospect. He’s rich, successful, handsome. Why go after Adam?”

  “Yeah, George is all of those things, but he’s not exactly available. He sleeps with all of his assistants—it’s practically a job requirement. I’m just one in a long line that he’s bedded. Everyone knows he’s not looking to get married. I was terrified he’d turn his back on me when he found out I was pregnant.” Kelly sniffs, dabbing her eyes with her sleeve. “I knew what he was doing was wrong, but I was so desperate to hold on to my job. I didn’t consider the consequences of the damage he was inflicting on you.”

  “But you said he’s a romantic a heart. How does that compute? Shouldn’t he be showering you with roses and massaging your feet for bearing his child?” Adam furrows his brow, trying to get a better picture of the man.

  “He doesn’t want children. He thinks raising a child will take valuable time away from his research.” Kelly sighs, closing her eyes. “He made it clear that he’s not interested in becoming a father.”

  “And what? Now he is?” I watch her reaction carefully.

  “I wouldn’t say that, but I know he’ll provide us with a comfortable home, even if he’s never there to share it.” The sadness etched on her face is painful to behold.

  “Kelly, you can’t accept this as your fate. Leave him. Find another job. Raise the baby on your own. Do whatever it takes,” Adam pleads with her. “It’s not fair to either one of you.”

  “But don’t you see?” she asks, looking at both of us. “Now that he knows the baby is his, he’ll never let me go. He’s extremely possessive when it comes to whatever belongs to him. Can’t you see? He won’t even let you out of his study, Adam. It’s just how he is.”