Even When It's Wrong

by Nicole Jackson

  “Okay, man,” he breathed, before driving forward.

  “Stop right here,” I instructed.

  He frowned. “Man, you said that aint nobody here around this time of the day. But I see a fucking car in the driveway clear as day.”

  “I know.” I pushed my door open, and scooted out of the seat. Standing up, I dug into my bosom, retrieving my pocket knife. “I’ll be right back,” I promised, before wobbling over to the Honda Accord that I’d learned through Facebook was Nerie’s. Some dumb ass nigga had foolishly bought it for her disloyal ass.

  With revenge on my mind, I knelt low, before stabbing her tire. Booshhh. I then proceeded to the slash the other three, before calmly stepping back to the Porsche.

  “Okay,” I sighed, easing back into the car. “Let’s go.”

  Flame cut his eyes at me. “I gotta keep my eyes on you.”

  “What?” I threw my hands up, as he pulled away from the curb.

  “You did that shit too easy.”

  I shrugged. “She deserved it.”

  “Hey, I can’t argue with that.”

  I smirked. “I know you can’t.”

  Chapter 31

  Mya

  “Hang tight, man. I’ll be right back,” Flame instructed, as he eased out of the car.

  I took the time to glance around. We’d just pulled into some townhouses on the southwest side. They were pretty nice…nothing like where Flame resided, or even Omari, but they were nice. I didn’t know who lived here, or anything. Flame had received a call, when we were headed to Lotus’, and busted a U-turn in the middle of the street. He offered no explanation, as he sped all the way here.

  As I continuously checked out the scenery, my phone vibrated. Gazing down at the screen, I saw that it was message from Omari. Checking it out, I realized that it was video.

  “Cupid doesn’t lie, but you won’t know, unless you give it a try…”

  “Man,” I dragged out, tucking my lips into my mouth. I knew exactly what he was trying to do, as my heart raced. He wanted to wear me down. Make me weak. And my God it was working. I was missing that man so much that my body ached.

  Day by day, I considered the notion of forgiving him, and taking him back. Regardless of what he’d done, I loved him, and it was brutal punishment to be without him. Honestly, had I gone to anyone else’s home, I’d probably already be back at home, letting Omari make everything up to me, but I would’ve been the lamest bitch ever to go back that easily.

  “Why you had to fuck up?” I whispered to myself, before he called me.

  I held my phone in my hand, staring at it. I thought about everything, and how he’d hurt me, but I also considered that I was carrying his child. He had the right to know that everything was okay, and I decided to give him that much.

  “Hello,” I answered.

  “Mya!” he shouted in my damn ear.

  “Yeah, what’s up?”

  “Baby, where are you? Are you okay?” he interrogated anxiously.

  “Yes, I’m fine, Omari.”

  “Okay, where are you? Let me come get you.”

  “Now, that’s not gonna happen.”

  “Baby, why? I’m telling you that I’d never do you like that. That bitch was never worth losing you. She caught me slipping. On my son, My.”

  “So, you’d really put that shit on my baby?” I snapped.

  “Hell, yeah. God can take him from us right now, if I’m lying.”

  “Yeah, okay,” I scoffed.

  “My, please, just come home, baby. I can’t eat. I can’t sleep. Just come home. I’ll do anything. Anything,” he begged desperately.

  “I can’t,” I sniveled. “I…I can’t trust you.”

  “Yes, you can, girl. I put that on everything I love. Just…just meet me somewhere, and let me talk to you face to face.”

  I tucked my lips into my mouth, as I mulled it over.

  “You really got me fucked up!” someone shouted.

  My head shot up, spotting Flame standing right outside my door.

  “Let me call you back,” I said, before abruptly ending the call.

  “This nigga don’t know me,” Flame growled, before snatching my door open. That’s when I realized that he was carrying his little girl, which I recognized from photos. “Mya, hold my baby, right quick,” he commanded, before dropping the baby into my lap.

  I held the baby, while he slammed the door in our faces. Of course, the baby was crying, trying to escape my grasp, while my cell rang. “The hell is going on?” I grumbled to myself, as I watched a thick chick race up to Flame. She actually reminded me of myself. We had very similar shapes, and eerily similar facial features.

  “Nigga, where is you going with my child?!” she shouted, getting directly in his face.

  “Bitch, she going with me!” he belted. “Your mama texted my phone, telling me how you was planning on burning off, and leaving her with that loser ass nigga of yours. You got me fucked up, though. My baby don’t talk well enough to tell me if that nigga do something inappropriate, and you aint got no business leaving her with him.”

  “She loves that man!” his baby mama shouted. “And you can’t control my life! He’s my man, and is around her more than you! And look at this shit. You got some bitch in there holding her, and I don’t know her. What’s the fucking difference?”

  I shook my head, thinking that Flame had dragged me into some bullshit. Under normal circumstances, I would’ve been ready to take a hoe’s head off for calling me out of my name, but Flame was asking for it, bringing me to that girl’s house. And I never understood how niggas thought that their kids weren’t going to be around other men, once their relationships end.

  “Man, miss me with all that.” I waved her off, before stomping around to the driver’s side of the car.

  “Bowlly!” she screamed. “Come get this nigga.”

  The next thing I knew, a shirtless, tall, red nigga came barreling towards Flame. “I told you what I was gonna do to you, fuck nigga,” he spewed, before swinging on Flame.

  Flame blocked the blow, and countered with his own. He then yoked the dude up, putting him a chokehold.

  “Stop!” his baby mama demanded, as she ran over, raining punches all over his back.

  Flame wasn’t deterred, as ole girl attempted to stop him. He managed to get the dude Bowlly on the ground, before stomping the daylights out of him. Then once the guy had seemingly gave up the fight, Flame hocked up, and spat on him.

  “I hate you!” his baby mama roared, as Flame casually slid into the car.

  “Shut the fuck up, you stupid bitch,” he seethed, closing the door in her face.

  I sat silently, while he pulled away from the townhouses. After seeing that shit, I was speechless, and realized that even as suave as Flame was, even he wasn’t immune to drama and bullshit.

  ******

  “That bitch really got me hot, man,” Flame mumbled, as we stepped into his spot.

  “All I know is that the whole situation was crazy,” I commented, as I watched him place his sleeping daughter on the sectional.

  He lifted his head. “Yeah, it was, and I apologize for that. I be preaching about you staying out the way, and here I go dragging you into bullshit.”

  “It’s cool. You human.” I waved him off, as I sat on the opposite end of the couch.

  “Right,” he sighed, before flopping down onto the couch. “This shit is just frustrating.” He allowed his head to fall back, while he palmed his face with both hands.

  “Well, you shouldn’t have fucked up, Flame. Then some other nigga wouldn’t be around your daughter,” I offered my two-cents.

  His head snapped up. “What?”

  “I’m just saying. Yall niggas be wanting to raise hell, after creating the circumstances.”

  He frowned. “Mya. Please quit, while you’re ahead. Cause you really all off base, right now.”

  I narrowed my eyes. “So, yall didn’t break up, because you were cheating?”
/>   He shook his head, as if he was disappointed in me. “You really need to get this shit in your head.” He pointed a finger my way. “Every man aint the same, and I most definitely aint that clown ass nigga you pregnant for.”

  “So, you didn’t cheat?” I pursed my lips, refusing to believe that he’d never stepped out on that girl.

  He rubbed his hands together. “Let’s just get this straight. Me and my BM didn’t break up, because of my infidelity, okay? She was the cause of us breaking up. I was on some exclusive steez, and she shitted on me.”

  “How?” I wanted to know.

  He nodded. “I’ll give you the whole run down.”

  “Okay.”

  “Me and my BM met when I was eighteen, and she was sixteen. That was five years ago. At the time, she had a boyfriend in jail. She claimed that she was waiting on him, but I didn’t give a fuck. I liked what I saw, so I went after her. It took me a minute before I even fucked her. A whole year, honestly. She was what you called one of the good ones, and she was loyal to that nigga. But after I hit it, it was a wrap. We started fucking like rabbits, but she was still writing that nigga. After a while, that caused problems, and I started fucking with other girls. Eventually, she was in her feelings, crying and tripping. So, I made her choose between me and that nigga in jail. She chose me. From that point on, it had been about us. I aint give a fuck about no other bitch. We lived together for a year and some change, and then she got pregnant with the baby. I aint gon lie, we’d been trying to make her for a minute, so a nigga was elated. I went out of my way to do anything for her and my baby.

  Everything was all good, until that nigga got out. All of sudden, she wants to hang out more, and come in later. Then the petty arguments started. It was like everything I did got on her nerves. Like she hated me. I kept telling myself that she wouldn’t backtrack to that nigga. I mean, he had just gotten out of jail, and didn’t have shit to offer her. But after a while, I knew that something wasn’t right. So, I followed her ass one day. She took the car that I’d bought her to pick this nigga up. Then her dumb ass got in the passenger’s seat, letting him drive the fucking car I bought. You know I went off, and beat the brakes off that nigga. The scandalous hoe was on his side, begging me not to kill him. If it wasn’t for my daughter, I would’ve killed the both of them. On God. Then the fucked-up part about it was that I still loved the hoe. So, she came to me talking about how she was confused, and that I wasn’t innocent, bringing up all the hoes I’d fucked when we first started fucking around. Thinking that I could save my family, I called myself forgiving her. But after a couple of months, I realized that I couldn’t forget the shit. Then the nigga wouldn’t leave out the picture, swearing that they was still fucking. She swore up and down that she wasn’t fucking with him like that, but right after I told her that I couldn’t be with her, she announced that she was six-weeks pregnant. The killing part was that she was saying that it was for him! That told me everything I needed to know. I mean, there was no way in hell for her to really know who the baby was for, but I knew that she’d never stopped fucking with him. Anyway, she had the baby too early, and it stayed in the hospital for two months before dying. While he was in there, I had a DNA test done, and found out that his lil’ ass was mine. I was so fucked up about the whole situation that I refused to help her with the funeral arrangements, and the bitch went on a smear campaign, telling everybody that I abandoned my kids. Then after all that, I think she realized that life wasn’t what it was cracked up to be with ole boy, so she came begging me back. But I was done. And I really think that she went got back with him out of spite, making sure that the one nigga I can’t stand is around my daughter. Then when I get to complaining she tell me how this wouldn’t be a problem if I’d come back to my family. On some manipulative shit. And that done created real bad blood between us.”

  I was in shock. I don’t know why I didn’t consider the fact that the chick could be responsible for their ending. You’d think that a dude like Flame wouldn’t have a problem with scooping up a faithful girl. Then I thought about the fact that he’d blatantly gotten with her, while she had emotional ties to someone else. That told me that the flyest nigga around couldn’t make you forget about the one you love. Not when it’s real. This also made me think about our situation. I’d run to him with a bleeding heart, and he’d offered significant relief, but I hadn’t contemplated on what would happen when I was all out of tears, and was ready to deal with Omari. Would I be doing the same thing that his baby mama had done? Did I owe him more than that?

  “Flame, that’s fucked up,” I admitted. “I would’ve never guess that things had gone down like that.”

  “I know. Yall women kill me with that narrative that every nigga in the world is no good, like there aint some confused, heartless bitch that made us that way. In this day and age, women are dogs too. My BM showed me that shit.”

  “Is that why you haven’t gotten with another girl since?” I asked.

  “Partially. I aint gonna say that I’m turned off from having a gal, but I haven’t been in a hurry to go that route again. It’s way less drama that way.”

  “I think I get it now,” I smiled.

  “Yeah, but then again, it could be something up with me. Cause I can’t seem to find a girl I like that aint already with a nigga. Like you, for example. You one of the first chicks I’ve felt since my BM, but look at us. You pregnant for the next man.”

  “Right.”

  “And what are you gonna do about that whole situation, anyway?”

  “I don’t know,” I breathed heavily. “Sometimes I feel like I just need to go home. I’m about to have this baby, and I don’t know what the hell I’m doing. Then this aint your responsibility…”

  “But I don’t mind helping you,” he offered, cutting me off.

  “Flame.” I gave him a look. “I think you just saying shit without putting much thought into it. Me and you aint together, which means that anything can happen. You can get with a girl that you like, and where would that leave me and my baby? I doubt the next chick would be understanding of you helping me and my child. It would be too complicated. Then there’s Omari. You see how you act behind your daughter. So, just imagine how he’ll be tripping. It’s just too much.”

  “Mya, you full of shit. Some kind of way, you always manage bringing up a non-existent situation. I aint got a bitch, and I’m only digging you, right now. Why don’t you ever take that into consideration? I mean, what? You can’t see yourself fucking with me?”

  I swallowed hard. “Yeah, I can.”

  He scooted over, closing the gap between us. “So, what’s the problem?” he enquired, easing an arm around me.

  “There aint one. I just wanna take my time. No pressure.”

  “Oh, trust me.” he leaned in. “There aint no pressure.” He hungrily kissed my lips.

  My head fell back into the couch, as he took our kiss deeper. My hormones were raging, and my body was responding to him, as he fondled me. His touch felt so soothing, as he grazed over my breasts, and stomach. I felt him squeeze his hand between my thighs, before making his way to my kitty. Of course, I wore no panties, so he was able to quickly find his way to my clit. Using his index finger, he stroked me, causing me to moisten.

  “No.” I grabbed his wrist. “Your baby is right there. I’m not doing this with you.”

  He removed his hand from between my legs, before standing. “Okay.” He grabbed my hand. “Let’s go in the room.”

  “Nooo, Flame,” I whined.

  “Come on, girl.” he pulled me to feet, despite my protesting. “Stop acting scared.” He guided me back to his room, and closed the door behind us.

  “Flame,” I sighed. “What the hell are you gonna do with my big ass? I can’t even see my own coochie.”

  “What I’ma do with your big ass?” he regurgitated. “Shit lay your ass on this bed, and let me show you what I can do.”

  Not waiting for me to decide if that’s what I wante
d to do, he pushed me back onto the bed.

  “Lay down,” he insisted, putting me on my back.

  I lied there, gazing up at the ceiling. I felt him lift my dress above my huge belly. When he pushed my legs apart, my clit thumped against my will. Omari crossed my mind, and I knew that he’d want to kill me if he’d known that I was in that position, right then. Then flashes of him letting Nerie suck him off entered my mind, telling me that me being in Flame’s bed was justified.

  “I just want to make you feel good,” Flame whispered, before sliding his tongue across my pearl.

  “Oh,” I arched my back, as the sensation he provided caught me off guard.

  Flame was performing some type of magic tricks with his tongue. He was suckling my clit, while continuously darting the tip of his tongue across it.

  “Uhhh,” I panted, as he lapped up my juices. “Oh, God.”

  He nastily rubbed his entire face in it, driving me crazy.

  “Fuck,” I bit my bottom lip.

  Once he zeroed in on my clit again, sucking it hard, my hips began to buck. My body shook almost violently, as I busted on his tongue. My eyes rolled into the back of my head, as I struggled to catch my bearings. I was brought back to reality, as I felt him position himself on the bed between my legs.

  “Wait, Flame.” I shook my head. “I don’t know about this.”

  “Just chill out. Relax. Let me help you feel good,” he urged, pressing his dick against the mouth of my pussy.

  I gasped, as I felt him enter me. It had been a little second since someone had been inside of me, and I was tight. Therefore, he took slow, deliberate strokes. I could feel the head of his dick bumping against my clit, stimulating the shit out of it.

  “Damn, this pussy feels so fucking good,” he moaned, while his legs were tucked underneath him, and he had my lower body in his lap. He watched himself slide in and out of the me in an unhurried pace.

  I closed my eyes tightly, as he took his time with me. Admittedly, he was delivering immeasurable amounts of pleasure, but something in my soul didn’t feel right. This wasn’t somebody I loved. Sadly, he wasn’t even who I wanted. So, when he emptied himself inside of me, my soul also felt empty.